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Struggling in open relationship

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By *NMale OP   Man
1 week ago

Portsmouth

Evening. Start of last year my wife suggested an open relationship, reluctantly I have gone along with it. I have no issue being with others but really struggle when she meets people especially as she enjoys the social/dating aspect. People have said if both sides don’t agree to stop but I feel in time it’ll get easier and feel more normal.

Am I doing the right thing here, it’s been a year and I still wouldn’t say it was easy.

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By *indsay96Woman
1 week ago

foel

Not if your not happy, both need to be happy with it

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By *ykiesxMan
1 week ago

Eastbourne

In my experience, one partner is always most certainly tagging along for the other.

As a singl guy that date couples, i havent met a conpletely equally invested couple in the lifestyle.

Its always tinted somehow to one person's kink or fetish and the other partner comes along.

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By *aandLoCouple
1 week ago

Southampton

If it's been a year and you're still unsettled by having opened up your sex life, then I'd say you need to talk to your wife. Tell her how you feel and find a way forward that makes you both happy.

We've been on the scene around 18 months now and through that time we have always said it's just sex, it's fun and does not define our relationship.

Ja actually found he wasn't that interested in fucking other women but loved watching, and being part of other men fucking me. So, over the last few months we've tailored our connections to those which make us both happy.

I would have liked couple swaps, and the opportunity of FF fun that brings too, but is me having that fun more important than our marriage? No way!

If the marriage being open is more important to her than what the two of you have then perhaps you need to consider your options.

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By *otshot14Woman
1 week ago

tunbridge wells

Have you thought about doing some dating aswell when she is out,I used to be in one,and found when he was out I would either date or find something to keep me busy,she could film it so I don't feel so crappy.

U really need an open up front conversion

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By *ichaelsmyMan
1 week ago

douglas

if you are not happy after a year, then you will not be happy.

change the relationship

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
1 week ago

Cambridgeshire

The one thing I'd say is that while you can talk to her, and she may agree to stop, that doesn't mean she'll actually stop. She'll just stop telling you...

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By *eriously KinkyMan
1 week ago

West Midlands

In my experience, compromises rarely work in the long term. Jealousy occurs, people start keeping secrets (to avoid hurting the other), then the relationship suffers.

It’s easy to say, but be honest with her about your feelings and try to find things that bring you both pleasure at the same time. Stick to those things until you find new ideas that excite you both, and enjoy that journey together.

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By *WB85Man
1 week ago

Staffordshire

The problem is your partner can be inundated with offers, but as a single man effectively your audience is much smaller.

You need to find a way of balancing it.

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By *um n raisinWoman
1 week ago

taunton

its simple as a couple your both on the same page or it simply wont work many couples end up killing thier own relationships this way . there a reason many try swinging and realize its not for them the turn over of couplers is high...

now if you are on the same page then you must understand the woman will all ways get the main attention if meeting singles and the man will be treated like every other single male on the scene being in a coup;e will not make it easier ..

hope you get it sorted good luck x

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By *issmorganWoman
1 week ago

Calderdale innit

Hi op, you should talk to your partner and explain its not feeling right for you.

You shouldn't have to do swim thing that isn't working or sitting well with you.

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By *izards SleeveTV/TS
1 week ago

Newport

If you have no issue meeting others yourself, you should deal with your jealousy of her meeting others or call it off all together. Can't have it both ways unfortunately.

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By *lwaysup4it69Couple
1 week ago

Kirkby in Ashfield

As already says you both have to be in the same page with opening up the relationship to include others. We have meets as couples and open to meeting alone. So far I (male) has had a few solo meets, f has not as yet but will do at some point. For us it is just sex and anyone we have or will meet is told this from the start

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By *DHotwife24Couple
1 week ago

warrington

We are swingers but haven't opened up our relationship to actually coupling up with someone. However, sometimes I (female) have people that I chat to and get to go for drinks and stuff as part of having hotwife meets and that's enough for me. D doesn't really do that, both because it's harder for him as a single male and because I don't think he enjoys the social side as much as I do.

Would a similar arrangement work for you? I have a lovely time on the odd occasion I go out with someone and love making friends but I have no desire to have a relationship with anyone other than D for all sorts of reasons. Does she want socials or a relationship with the other people?

You do definitely need to be on the same page though as others have said otherwise problems will start to appear. Good luck

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By *iking_on_a_bikeMan
1 week ago

marlborough

Talk talk talk.

Talk to your partner and work things out.

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By *heSuccubusWoman
7 days ago

Darlington

Does she know how you feel? If not, tell her .

I like the dynamic i have with my husband, but I certainly don't like it more than making him unhappy .

Just fyi, I'd be all over your profile if I were closer

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By *omsarah73Couple
7 days ago

Suffolk

Must admit this is a love hate relationship for me Tom

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By *iver78Man
7 days ago

barton upon humber

Never been in one but have met a women who was

I had the unfortunate situation were her husband came to me to tell me he wasent 100 percent on board. Was a very hard conversation " I'm not good with deep conversations " but I did stop seeing her , but as I said to him ,the chances are she just go behind his back !

It's a tough one , but if one is wanting it then chances are they will do it without there partners consent !!

Good luck mate

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By *herrybakewellCouple
7 days ago

Staffordshire


"Must admit this is a love hate relationship for me Tom"

I'd really have to agree with you on this.....my mood with it all varies. Some times I'm all over it, other times I feel a little overlooked and irrelevant.

I get far less interest than my wife....as we have to expect.

Mr.

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By *urry BlokeMan
7 days ago

You need to find the common ground

That involves adult conversation and checking in with both yourself and each other regularly

I am in an open relat and it isn't easy, especially as I am older by 24 years, so meet far less regularly

We have a framework to adhere to and some hard no's

You have to trust that their respect for you stays within that framework and doesn't cross any lines you have agreed to

I too, am not happy about the whole familiarity / dating thing, so we have a 3 meet maximum with any 1 person

Beyond that,to me, it goes in the direction of a sanctioned 'affair'

Physical infidelity I can live with

Emotional infidelity is a huge barrier that, once crossed, I'm not sure I could come back from

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By *ayd100Man
7 days ago

clitheroe

I'm cuck husband so don't have much of a choice.

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By *essTTWoman
6 days ago

Birmingham

You need to speak to her. It won't work if you not both into it

Hope it works out

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By *esparate danMan
5 days ago

glasgow


"You need to find the common ground

That involves adult conversation and checking in with both yourself and each other regularly

I am in an open relat and it isn't easy, especially as I am older by 24 years, so meet far less regularly

We have a framework to adhere to and some hard no's

You have to trust that their respect for you stays within that framework and doesn't cross any lines you have agreed to

I too, am not happy about the whole familiarity / dating thing, so we have a 3 meet maximum with any 1 person

Beyond that,to me, it goes in the direction of a sanctioned 'affair'

Physical infidelity I can live with

Emotional infidelity is a huge barrier that, once crossed, I'm not sure I could come back from"

Theres always going to be a danger of slipping into an uneven power dynamic putting restrictions into a relationship where you are not fully invested

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By *avrick180Man
6 hours ago

Pontypool

Its hard work as my ex gave me a week to decide if I want to stay with her we have a open relationship then found out after we finished she been seeing him for 3 months

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By *ust and PoundCouple
2 hours ago

Wirral

Open relationships seem best when established from the start. Introducing one later in a relationship can create differences in expectations or experiences, which can cause issues depending on what you both want from the situation

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By *aren_nylonsWoman
2 hours ago

Great Dunmow

You sound a genuine nice guy.

Is your wife on here with her own profile or where is she finding her partners?

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