FabSwingers.com forum: Why can't I get a social?

By *our teach OP Man
17 weeks ago

lough

I'm messaging introducing myself, interests (non sexual) and just asking to meet for a social but not getting anywhere.

I attach body pics (not dick) and someone's a face pic depending on their profile.

I know couples and females get loads of messages.

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By *iverstMan
17 weeks ago

Rossendale

Why not find an organised social. It's far more likely to happen than a 1 to 1. I would expect a 1 to 1 social being as a result of getting to know someone first, not because you messaged asking for one. And also, your photos asking who would like a biology lesson, or who would like to suck, don't scream you are purely looking for a social!

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By *iss DevilWoman
17 weeks ago

Bedford

With a 1:1 social, there are too many expectations (despite what people say). Best to find an organised social and attend that- there is a regular one in Northampton that shouldn't be too far for you, OP. There used to be one in MK as well, but not sure if it's still running.

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By *lenaMalenaTV/TS
17 weeks ago

Milton Keynes

As above-mentioned, an organised Social. I've seen many posts here about a regular organised 'Northampton Fab Social' so have a look for that?

(Or a Club visit, that's worked ok for me a few times).

Good Luck!

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By *oredmum1982Woman
17 weeks ago

E.Mids

Maybe try to build a rapport with them before launching into asking to meet in person?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
Forum Mod
17 weeks ago

Central

There is no entitlement to a social or sex with anyone here. Your expectations suggest that they aren't perhaps that close to being realistic. It would probably help you if you changed them so that they are

We can't make people to be more likely to find you attractive. That will generally be the reason that people will want to get to know each other and possibly meet. But they could take weeks or months to get to assess and know each other.

It can't generally be achieved in 1 message, similar to sending out a menu for some items and getting them delivered by return.

If you truly think your profile shows you at your best, there may be someone here who could want that. But no guarantees

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By *ot GirlfriendCouple
17 weeks ago

Crayford

Make sure you read their profile in full and don’t ask questions if the answer is in the profile.

For example we are very specific, no BBC, smokers or small cocks but we still get messages from them so we instantly block

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By *acky RacersCouple
17 weeks ago

Lincoln

We generally always have a social before we decide to take things further...heres how it goes...

Contact is made...usually an interesting, generic message that sparks interest.

Several messages are exchanged, establishing a rapport, mutual interests and deepening the desire to meet in real life. This will always include exchange of face pictures...

We say...we're interested in seeing where this goes, fancy meeting for a drink somewhere? No obligations...but we rarely meet people for play that we haven't met socially.

A mutually agreed time and place is settled on...they either turn up and we get on, they turn up and either we are not for them or vice versa and we agree not to take things further or they don't turn up and we have a nice drink out and sometimes have us tea out as well...

We don't arrange to meet in any capacity from an initial first message asking for one...social or otherwise

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By *allySlinkyWoman
17 weeks ago

Leeds

OP I'm puzzled how you know you want to have a social with someone without chatting to them first.

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By *issmorganWoman
17 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

I would take a guess that one reason, may be because nothing in your profile suggests you are into socials.

Even your meet requests suggests massages and people coming over to you in hotels. It looks like you're after to sex and nothing more, just my opinion.

Perhaps add a bit in your profile saying you like a social with no pressure for anything else, unless both want to.

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By *iss DevilWoman
17 weeks ago

Bedford

"OP I'm puzzled how you know you want to have a social with someone without chatting to them first. "
I'm guessing it's so he can get verified. As a verification from "meeting in person" is a golden ticket on here...

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By *issmorganWoman
17 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

Also op as others pointed out, not many women or couples would meet even for a social after one or two messages.

You'd be better putting time in, getting to know someone, before suggesting a meet.

It totally puts me off if someone asks to meet me in a first message, when they don't know me at all and haven't seen me etc..

Don't rush things, if you do get a social, don't expect it would be more than a social drink and chat either.

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By *our teach OP Man
17 weeks ago

lough

Thank you all to the feedback

Much appreciated and will take it on board

I'm not demanding a social, I've suggested a social and a chance to have a chat.

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By *emo2025Man
17 weeks ago

Norwich

"OP I'm puzzled how you know you want to have a social with someone without chatting to them first. I'm guessing it's so he can get verified. As a verification from "meeting in person" is a golden ticket on here...

A couple of verifications from a large social meet, hasn’t made any difference to me receiving a response to a polite first message. I was hoping it might help a little. I’ll keep trying though.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
Forum Mod
17 weeks ago

Central

A couple of verifications from a large social meet, hasn’t made any difference to me receiving a response to a polite first message. I was hoping it might help a little. I’ll keep trying though. "

It's a numbers game, as most people are not mutually compatible with most other people. Thus almost all won't reply with a message.

But more people will search for a man like you, who's verified

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
Forum Mod
17 weeks ago

Central

"Thank you all to the feedback

Much appreciated and will take it on board

I'm not demanding a social, I've suggested a social and a chance to have a chat.

It's good to see you wanting to take it on board, as the people here have lots of experience and want others to be guided by their ups and downs, etc.

Expect to take things slowly with people and not give them any perception of being pushed, etc

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By *emo2025Man
17 weeks ago

Norwich

A couple of verifications from a large social meet, hasn’t made any difference to me receiving a response to a polite first message. I was hoping it might help a little. I’ll keep trying though.

It's a numbers game, as most people are not mutually compatible with most other people. Thus almost all won't reply with a message.

But more people will search for a man like you, who's verified

Ok, fair enough, I’ll keep sending messages to those that catch my eye and mind then. Hopefully someone will reply at some point.

Thank you.

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By *aturalbabeWoman
16 weeks ago

london/surrey

"Make sure you read their profile in full and don’t ask questions if the answer is in the profile.

For example we are very specific, no BBC, smokers or small cocks but we still get messages from them so we instantly block

Is it so true. I feel like I’m forever repeating myself when people message me.

I’m alway up for a social in public but it’s normal a coffee then I started to ween out those who are genuinely interested

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By *igladAndLulahCouple
16 weeks ago

South East

[Removed by poster at 26/01/26 15:39:41]

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By *igladAndLulahCouple
16 weeks ago

South East

"I'm messaging introducing myself, interests (non sexual) and just asking to meet for a social but not getting anywhere.

I attach body pics (not dick) and someone's a face pic depending on their profile.

I know couples and females get loads of messages. "

Go to a pre arranged local social and meet multiple people, or go to a club. This way you might get some verifications and this will make a big difference

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