FabSwingers.com forum: Is there something im doing wrong

By *exyEmmsy47 OP Couple
19 weeks ago

alfreton

Me and my partner have been trying to find a lady to join us but every time it gets to the crunch they dont show or want money which im not interested in paying for it, we're just looking for a honest person and have total respect for what the other lady wants can anyone tell me am I doing something wrong as im on the verge of giving up thanks for any advice given

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By *aven RedWoman
19 weeks ago

who knows, but it's not raining x

Maybe with a couples profile you might have more luck OP x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
19 weeks ago

East Sussex

Possibly they're concerned about meeting a couple from a single woman's profile. If I was meeting as a single woman I wouldn't feel safe under those circumstances

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
19 weeks ago

East Sussex

Also report people who ask for money

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By *hortieWoman
19 weeks ago

Northampton

Hey, I've got a friend who'd ...

'block, delete'

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By *ev_1Couple
19 weeks ago

Bickliegh

Join the queue sorry it's not easy

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By *allySlinkyWoman
19 weeks ago

Leeds

Maybe it's the "let's see if you can handle us" phrase which is a bit daunting.

Also, you are expecting the woman to come to your home which again is daunting.

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By *acky RacersCouple
19 weeks ago

Lincoln

"Me and my partner have been trying to find a lady to join us but every time it gets to the crunch they dont show or want money which im not interested in paying for it, we're just looking for a honest person and have total respect for what the other lady wants can anyone tell me am I doing something wrong as im on the verge of giving up thanks for any advice given "

You're looking to meet as a couple on a single female profile as a start...we call those bait profiles and were an absolute no for me when I had a single female profile

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By *oucancallmeAlMan
19 weeks ago

east anglia

To be honest a few things make the alarms sound.

1. Single woman's profile

2. A rather generic profile

3. Lack of Verifications

4. Lack of information about your friend.

If I was a single woman I wouldnt meet you. I would think there is a chance your profile is fake.

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
19 weeks ago

Tamworth

I never engage with singles who contact me looking to meet with a friend or partner.

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By *oiluvfunMan
19 weeks ago

Birmingham

Wow OP! You’re about to give up after a hectic, full-on commitment of 6 weeks in here, without the success you were hoping for………?

The majority of single guys won’t get a meet through here after a year, yet day after day, the advice they are given is “just be patient”.

Perhaps there are bi ladies out there, who would like to join you, 121, without your bbc partner? Perhaps there are bi ladies looking for you, as the couple you are, but will only meet in a swinger club (this is very common in Fab, many swingers do not step outside of the club scene 🫣 )

Adding some punctuation to your profile text will make it appear less like you tapped it out on your phone screen in the taxi to work 🤭

Give it time OP; the right people are out there, let them find you 😎👍

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By *uperstar76Woman
19 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

The line can you handle us.. naw just naw

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By *iss DevilWoman
19 weeks ago

Bedford

As above, way too many red flags. Either create couple's profile with your partner or try clubs. And definitely rethink your bio. Though ultimately, it is your profile and should be reflecting you.

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By *aandLoCouple
19 weeks ago

Southampton

As previous posters have said a couples profile with a considered bio would definitely improve your chances.

Think carefully about how you, as a single woman would be confident and feel safe to meet and progress a connection?

I like the fun, casualness of your profile but the jarring thing for me is there's a full face picture of you, and not so much as a tease of your partner. Also, isn't he more than just a BBC, and hence deserves a bit more of a mention if he's going to be at meets?

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By *hoice-DuoCouple
19 weeks ago

Bristol

Couples profile. No interest from single bi women, or many bi couples to be honest. Loads of men want in, of course, hahaha.

Beginning to think that’s just Fab. Guessing the best experience on here has to be for the Straight/Bi couple..?

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By *parky123Man
19 weeks ago

Lincoln

There may be more success had by making connections at club/s. Single bi women often report that they feel “preyed upon” by couples so will have their defences up. These things can happen, but maybe getting the vibe with no pressure might be best

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By *hoice-DuoCouple
19 weeks ago

Bristol

Wouldn’t go to a club these days. They were quite fun when we were in our 20s, but if you want a totally private situation in own home, they’re not a remotely useful fit. It is what it is. If only men are interested, we’ll probably just sign out of the profile for good at some point. You can’t make people meet hahaha

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By *e and him 2021Couple
19 weeks ago

stoke on trent

We’ve been on and off this site for years and unfortunately never found a single female on here, we’ve messaged loads of singles who’s profiles say want to meet couples but then to get a reply back to say it her and a partner, or to not even get a reply back to say no thanks. We’ve probably blocked more single females now so we won’t bother them again.

We’ve met a single females twice in clubs and one we do meet regularly when we are all free and booked a hotel for the night a few times.

We understand the safety situation and would always meet in an open area first time are even a few times to get the connection first.

So in our eyes a club situation is probably the best place to look and chat or going to a social event might work better.

Wishing you luck. X

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By *hoice-DuoCouple
19 weeks ago

Bristol

Makes sense. We would always do a safe vibes-check social first as much further other person as ourselves. But not going back to clubs. It’ll do what it does. If no dice, no worries.

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By *dwalu2Couple
19 weeks ago

Bristol

"We’ve been on and off this site for years and unfortunately never found a single female on here, we’ve messaged loads of singles who’s profiles say want to meet couples but then to get a reply back to say it her and a partner, or to not even get a reply back to say no thanks. We’ve probably blocked more single females now so we won’t bother them again.

We’ve met a single females twice in clubs and one we do meet regularly when we are all free and booked a hotel for the night a few times.

We understand the safety situation and would always meet in an open area first time are even a few times to get the connection first.

So in our eyes a club situation is probably the best place to look and chat or going to a social event might work better.

Wishing you luck. X"

We’ve always found it easier to meet single women through here than in clubs. We’ve not been active for a while but even when we were people were saying the same thing, that clubs were easier, but it never seems that way to us. Most of these women met us in our home, sometimes without a social (rarely our preference but sometimes that’s how it works).

If you are nice, relaxed, friendly and patient there’s no reason why you can’t find single women who will meet a couple on Fab. Which is not to say you are none of those things of you’ve not found Fab a success in this way of course, just that the above probably helps.

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By *issmorganWoman
19 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

I'm not your target market as a straight woman, but here's my take.

Single woman profile, not verified and asking for a single lady to meet, with a man, that there's no pics of.

If he's too shy to have a profile or any pics up, that's a bit concerning. What would he be like playing with 2 ladies?.

Most of us are suspicious of anyone who asks a man /woman to join them and someone else, from a single profile.

You'd be best going to a club, if he won't agree to join you here op.

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By *estinysswingersCouple
19 weeks ago

Worsley

You’re ‘unicorn’ hunting. You and thousands of others on here. Numbers aren’t on your side.

Doesn’t help you’re not on a couples profiles.

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By *aughtyandshyguyCouple
19 weeks ago

midlands based

If you are bi and wanting to meet a single woman why does your partner need to be involved ?

Your profile says he’s going to sit in the corner - that’s not creepy or off putting at all !!

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By *una_RaineCouple
19 weeks ago

worcester

Honestly it’s really difficult to meet single females on here, I’m not surprised because single women are bombarded by many messages of pretty much everyone, they can afford to be picky!

Since we joined we have been looking for a single female and we’ve spoke to a few but they end up losing our messages or bails on a social,

I’ve also been looking for a single female on my solo profile because sometimes it would just be nice to have a female friend and any added fun is a bonus, but not had much luck with that either

It’s extremely difficult to stand out to single women, I’d advice you go to clubs as a couple and find another couple who you get on with rather than a single female, even if you aren’t comfortable having the male half playing with you, you can tell them your boundaries and see if they align with what they are looking for

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
19 weeks ago

Pembrokeshire

finding the right match here has become more difficult we have found.

Some of that might be down to us, we have to face facts, time has ticked by since we started.

It would seem that single ladies are cautious (rightfully so) and it will take time to find somebody who wants the same things you do.

Think about what you can offer them to help them feel good about the prospect, not just demand what you want. Sounds obvious, but its what we have been told a few times by a few ladies.

We all need to be sure what we are getting into will be positive.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
18 weeks ago

Leeds

3 way attraction is difficult especially when they can only see one of you.

Mrs

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By *ortheastguy99Man
18 weeks ago

Sunderland

You do need to patent i got a meet pritty quickly this time back, but i would take on all the advice given to you by the other posters in the thread.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
18 weeks ago

North West

You can’t see the man in the profile so I wouldn’t meet blind.

Maybe attend a club organised social and get verified as a couple so people can see you both? You say your partner is shy for online but there is no expectation to play at such events and may be a good say to get into swinging. People would think you’re genuine much quicker I personally think.

And lastly, your bio reads as though you are much more into it than he is. Even mentioning cheating. Personally, if you guys aren’t 100% into it I’m probs not gonna take the chance of getting involved.

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By *DW1983Man
18 weeks ago

Blackpool, Aberdeen or Sheffield

It's maybe not a useful answer but I can't help thinking if you were a man asking for help, people would be responding much more harshly. Your situation soinds precarious, you say he feels like it's cheating but is slowly coming around to the idea - and while it's good to be open and honest and upfront, you really need for him to be on board before you start looking to meet. No one will want to jump into a situation where the other partner is potentially not comfortable.

You also mention your boundary of no kissing, say that's what he wants, but then that you don't know why it's a boundary. Again, it's a huge sign that you're probably not in the right place yourselves, so no one will want to get in the middle of it. If you don't understand your/his boundaries, you really need to sort that first. Clear communication is vital.

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By *hortieWoman
18 weeks ago

Northampton

"It's maybe not a useful answer but I can't help thinking if you were a man asking for help, people would be responding much more harshly. Your situation soinds precarious, you say he feels like it's cheating but is slowly coming around to the idea - and while it's good to be open and honest and upfront, you really need for him to be on board before you start looking to meet. No one will want to jump into a situation where the other partner is potentially not comfortable.

And you're sure it's not a man asking for help how, exactly??

😂

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By *uliette500Woman
18 weeks ago

Hull

You say you are a couple looking for a lady to join you but there is no details or pictures of the second person on your profile.

This on its own would be a huge red flag to me.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
18 weeks ago

Coventry

I would say try clubs or organised social events, it cuts out so much of the BS. You just get to meet single ladies face to face, if you click great, if not move on to the next. No wasted time, no trying to match diaries, just go on a night of your choosing.

For single ladies I'd especially recommend a couples and single ladies only night.

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By *attering_ramMan
18 weeks ago

Near You

Couples communicating via a singles account is the biggest red flag on this site 🚩

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By *eyeYCouple
18 weeks ago

Nr Leicester

"3 way attraction is difficult especially when they can only see one of you.

Mrs "

Yup!! 🤷😄

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By *estinysswingersCouple
18 weeks ago

Worsley

All the single women we’ve met have been at clubs rather than through Fab.

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By *razycoupleniCouple
18 weeks ago

belfast

Single bi females are called unicorns for a reason. If you are wanting to dip your toes into it possibly might be easier meeting a couple or at clubs. That profile for me is a total red flag. I would just delete it and make a fresh one

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By *issmorganWoman
18 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

"Couples communicating via a singles account is the biggest red flag on this site 🚩 "

I agree. I get lots of men who claim they're a couple looking my way,on single male accounts.

I don't even meet couples.

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
18 weeks ago

Tamworth

I’ve seen your profile update but I’m not sure it helps. If you’re looking to meet with someone else in the room, even if they’re just watching, you’re a couple in my view so I really think you should set up a new couples profile to maximise your chances.

If I can be very honest I’d also say your reference to him feeling it’s cheating would make me very reluctant to engage. Over the years, I’ve had encounters with couples who aren’t genuinely comfortable with the whole kit and caboodle and it’s been awkward, to say the least. It’s absolutely ok and natural to feel nervous but others will want to know you’re solid and that they’re not going to get caught up in issues.

Best of luck to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
18 weeks ago

Profile is off putting if I’m going to be blunt.

It doesn’t clearly state what you want. Is hubby watching? Is he participating, what roles are you playing? What are you doing? definitely make it sound sexier to entice your audience. Add a social meet, which may lead to hot fun.

Mine isn’t great, it’s not easy, I write for a living but this isn’t a standard dating site, being generic doesn’t work.

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By *viatrixWoman
18 weeks ago

Gatwick

I almost never fancy the man in a couple. 🤷‍♀️

So it is very rare that I actually meet couples for sex. Socially, definitely, but it very rarely does it go any further.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
18 weeks ago

Leeds

I wouldn't want to "perform" with a woman with a nervous, uncomfortable man watching.

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By *eyeYCouple
18 weeks ago

Nr Leicester

"I almost never fancy the man in a couple. 🤷‍♀️

So it is very rare that I actually meet couples for sex. Socially, definitely, but it very rarely does it go any further. "

You're not alone x

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By *anandwifeCouple
18 weeks ago

Melton Mowbray

We would love to chat

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