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Newbies Meet Advice

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By *hatCensoredCouple OP   Couple
1 week ago

South Yorkshire

Are meets/events for new people a thing?

I can see a lot of the the bigger private meets and events usually have a requirement for a minimum amount of verifications.

For example, me and my partner were just wanting to host a chilled social for other couples that are just new (or newer) to the whole lifestyle.

Maybe like a camping trip, or an AirBnB somewhere? Or just a long walk or something?

Is that something that people already host or would that be something some people would maybe be interested in?

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By *arryandhedgehogCouple
1 week ago

Essex

Search the forums for established socials around your area, newbies are usually welcome.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
1 week ago

Leeds

I think a chilled social for newbies is a great idea

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By *oongel2760Couple
7 days ago

Preston

Would be a brill idea and something we'd be up for attending. It'd be a nice dynamic to have more newbies than experience. We enjoyed our first club visit but it was super obvious we were soooo green compared to everyone else there

No problem with that but it would be cool to be able to share some time with fellow newbies for sure!

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By *ornyOlder1000Man
6 days ago

Bury


"Would be a brill idea and something we'd be up for attending. It'd be a nice dynamic to have more newbies than experience. We enjoyed our first club visit but it was super obvious we were soooo green compared to everyone else there

No problem with that but it would be cool to be able to share some time with fellow newbies for sure! "

Agreed. The constant advice to guys to just go to a club is not helpful in my opinion.

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By *alkingbobMan
6 days ago

Hamilton


"Would be a brill idea and something we'd be up for attending. It'd be a nice dynamic to have more newbies than experience. We enjoyed our first club visit but it was super obvious we were soooo green compared to everyone else there

No problem with that but it would be cool to be able to share some time with fellow newbies for sure!

Agreed. The constant advice to guys to just go to a club is not helpful in my opinion.

"

Agreed

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
6 days ago

Cambridgeshire

The problem is that most socials or events are organised by people with a lot of experience in the scene. There are a few that are charitable enough to organise an event for newbies, but not that many.

There are one or two clubs that have newbies nights, but I've no experience of them.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
6 days ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"The problem is that most socials or events are organised by people with a lot of experience in the scene. There are a few that are charitable enough to organise an event for newbies, but not that many.

There are one or two clubs that have newbies nights, but I've no experience of them."

It's not that organisers aren't charitable or willing to give people a chance.

The issue is that for safety reasons and to manage guestlists it's often essential to have some kind of verification process in place for attendees, which can lean towards using Fab veris when managing guestlists.

Even for clubs and large organised socials, you can pretty much guarantee that nearly 50% of unverified profiles that request to be added to guest lists for events won't show, which both affects the final number of attendees and also means many genuine people miss out on attending due to number caps.

In a perfect world there'd be no need for any such management of guest lists. But there most definitely is.

As said above though, many organised socials welcome newbies as much as anyone else. Likewise clubs.

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By *HE ONLY PLAN IS NO PLANMan
4 days ago

Westmidlands

Find your local social

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By *irty130Couple
3 days ago

Bristol Area

A thought occurs: if everyone is new/newbies, then you will have a lot more shy people not wanting to make any first move, or even maybe conversation; you won’t have anyone there with advice or experience to guide folks to their next steps, where’s good to go, where’s not; and if it’s even run by people with fewer verifications or less experience, then it will be difficult for people to trust that it will be a well run and safe event.

We run a social and very much welcome newbies to come to get their first verifications, and meet people in an environment where there’s no pressure to play. I LOVE giving advice to newbies! I hate it when they sit in the corner either hoping someone will talk to them, or scared of the same!

But yes to echo the above, the newest and least verified couples on our guest list are often the ones that don’t show. We don’t mind, but we’d have an awfully quiet event if it was only for newbies!

Even the big events like FFFF and “Newbies and Notso” invite a mix of people!

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By *rivervaderMan
2 days ago

bolton

I went to a Manchester social was very new at the time they were great all made it easy for me and was very friendly. It was in a bar in Manchester so no playing just chatting and having a drink

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By *rivervaderMan
2 days ago

bolton

[Removed by poster at 16/07/25 11:22:06]

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By *adamm7406Man
2 days ago

leeds

We have been wanting to dip our toes into the lifestyle but thr nerves keep getting better of us.

We are attending a newbie social this weekend if you'd like to meet us there.

It always helps when there's someone else in the same boat.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
2 days ago

Leeds

Where is the social ?

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By *r Mrs FuckableCouple
18 hours ago

Stoke


"Would be a brill idea and something we'd be up for attending. It'd be a nice dynamic to have more newbies than experience. We enjoyed our first club visit but it was super obvious we were soooo green compared to everyone else there

No problem with that but it would be cool to be able to share some time with fellow newbies for sure!

Agreed. The constant advice to guys to just go to a club is not helpful in my opinion.

"

Disagree. Guys in clubs by themselves show confidence, they've put their big boy pants on got out there!

Sorry but as a woman I want to see confidence, I don't want to be holding your hand.

Just my opinion.

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