FabSwingers.com forum: Presumptuous or predatory?

By *tto OP Woman
12 weeks ago

llanelli

Not sure if I’m over reacting here? Just starting to use this place again after a recent heartbreak and found myself chatting to a few people in chat room. I haven’t met any of them before but knew one guy who has exchanged pleasantries over the years in said room. I then entered emails with one person who told me that the other guy had contacted him saying ‘he wanted me and him involved with you, is he known to you?’

I’ve never spoken to either of them about meeting and certainly never spoken to the other guy in any other way but polite chat in a chat room! I’m pretty outraged that he was trying to tap me up without me knowing!

Is this giving you the ick or am I over reacting? I’ve blocked the bloke, I feel it’s predatory and at best presumptuous, thankfully the other person had enough respect to tell me.

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By *aizyWoman
12 weeks ago

west midlands

If it made you uncomfortable OP, you did the right thing. Me, I wouldn't be that bothered about it tbh, I'm not sure why he felt the need to tell you what the other man had said other than to get in your good books, and if I'm honest the other man telling him he wants to get with you both sounds more like he was more interested in him than you.

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By *onyHoveMan
12 weeks ago

North East

If you sense a red flag then bail out. I sometimes get men messaging me to seek details about people I've met, usually after seeing me on veris, etc. I always ignore.

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By *iss DevilWoman
12 weeks ago

Bedford

Unfortunately, some people on here do like to take liberties, as soon as they feel they have a foot in the door. A while ago, I was arranging a first meet with a guy. All was good until he asked if I "minded" if his "friend" joined us. Nah, of course I don't mind, meeting two strangers instead of just one... It's not any more risky for me as a single woman... Needless to say, he got blocked before he could reply.

OP, if it made you uncomfortable, don't listen to what anyone is saying and trust your gut, block the twat.

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By *exymarvelMan
12 weeks ago

cardiff

If it makes u uncomfortable then follow ur gut. You owe them nothing.

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By *iss DevilWoman
12 weeks ago

Bedford

Also, OP, I had a slightly similar situation, a guy who thought was my Dom (he wasn't!) was messaging men on my behalf without ever discussing it with me. I was getting messages from men all around the country, some even 200+ miles away. He got a right telling off, and I stopped seeing him shortly after, due to his erratic behaviour. It's not all bad though - I got an amazing FWB out of it, a guy who I would have never met otherwise as our criteria for looking on here were not compatible.

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By *eeshellsCouple
12 weeks ago

Reading

Suspect it was a classic chat room fantasist talking to someone else and just making things up to titillate themselves.

Block and move on.

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By *issmorganWoman
12 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

"Unfortunately, some people on here do like to take liberties, as soon as they feel they have a foot in the door. A while ago, I was arranging a first meet with a guy. All was good until he asked if I "minded" if his "friend" joined us. Nah, of course I don't mind, meeting two strangers instead of just one... It's not any more risky for me as a single woman... Needless to say, he got blocked before he could reply.

OP, if it made you uncomfortable, don't listen to what anyone is saying and trust your gut, block the twat. "

Agree and I've had this. Was chatting to a bloke and he suddenly mentioned bringing his female friend, who is very bi.

I said why and he mentioned the age old fantasy of seeing 2 ladies together.

I explained I'm straight, it says I'm straight on my bio and that I have no interest in putting on any kind of a show for him.

I then blocked him, he either hadn't read my bio in all the time we'd chatted, or he had and assumed if he asked me to play with another lady, I would.

People on here do really overstep the mark at times,only caring about what makes them horny.

If someone made you uncomfortable op then you're best avoiding them, if they overstep boundaries here, imagine what they'd be like in real life.

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By *tto OP Woman
12 weeks ago

llanelli

Thanks for all the replies, some really good points and I’m doubting myself much less. The bit that resonated loudly was ‘you owe them nothing’. Thank you for the reminder

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