FabSwingers.com forum: Hard to get replies as a single man

By *2828 OP Man
8 weeks ago

Exton

Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet?

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago

Both, plus about a hundred other reasons (probably).

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By *leaningdutiesMan
8 weeks ago

South London

Men ejaculate an average of 80 to 300 million sperm each time they cum, only one (occasionally more) gets lucky.

Take this rather exagerrated analogy and apply to the stuggles for single men on here, the competition is large as it is strong

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By *ean directMan
8 weeks ago

havant

Women and couples have so much choice so it’s expected that single guys will have to put more of an effort in there messages etc. just remember it’s not a cattle market be approachable be yourself and treat people respect.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
8 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

It's likely neither.

Most people will look at a profile before opening a message. If they see nothing of interest in the photos and text, or insufficient details to make a judgement call on whether you're potentially what they seek, then they'll not read it and move on to someone else.

The biggest mistake people make is putting more effort into a message than they do their profile. 🤷‍♂️

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By *WANDTGCouple
8 weeks ago

Borough of Greenwich

We always reply even if it's a no thanks.

But our query is this, why are all the single men on here ?

Especially anyone under 30. Surely the dating apps are more successful or why aren't you chasing skirt in the pubs and clubs. Our mindset is to go with swinging couples , yes there probably is a place for a third, if and when required. But I find single men trying to hook up for sex then moaning when they get nothing weird.

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By *enk15Man
8 weeks ago

Evesham

Chin up, OP. You've only been here 6 weeks.

Forget about the ratios and numbers.

Make your profile uniquely you, it's the first thing people will look at before/after reading your message.

Get involved in the forums. Look for local socials.

Be positive, respectful and kind but most of all be patient.

This is a lifestyle, not a quick leg over.

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By *eats888Man
8 weeks ago

Warrington

Yep. A lot of messages don’t even get read. It’s because it’s a cock fest on here and then women get absolutely hammered with messages and this also allows them to be picky (understandably and rightly)

Any tips ladies

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By *2828 OP Man
8 weeks ago

Exton

Thanks guys, I’ll try to make a bit of an effort with my profile

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By *ean directMan
8 weeks ago

havant

It’s like being in a pub and if Tom hardy or someone like you know all the women etc are looking at him not you. Just because it’s an app online it’s still that’s life.

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By *heelerMan
8 weeks ago

Northants

Keep trying there are females out there despite what you may think that will reply and things may develop.

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By *entenTeaCouple
8 weeks ago

Buckley North Wales

Use fab to stay in contact with the people you meet at clubs and events. Using it as single guy to contact new people is often a lesson in futility.

We get so many messages that clearly haven't read our profile or are so appalling written that it is utterly off putting.

Even well written messages just get depressing.

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By *oiluvfunMan
8 weeks ago

Penrith

"Use fab to stay in contact with the people you meet at clubs and events. Using it as single guy to contact new people is often a lesson in futility.

I found visiting clubs as a single guy a lesson in futility, and would never recommend the club scene to a mate……

OP; there are definitely far too many men in here, chasing ridiculously too few women, but it’s not impossible to get meets. Just be realistic about who you are hoping to make connections with, and be patient!

Statistically you are more likely to meet single ladies out there in vanillaland, than you are in here, or swinger clubs, so just enjoy Fab as an extra to life. Never take this place too seriously, and never think this is the only way to meet women! Good luck my friend

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By *rsKOTCTWoman
8 weeks ago

Leeds

You've only been here 6 weeks.

The 1st thing I do when I get a message is look at the profile, if it matches what I'm looking for and there's an initial attraction I'll reply, if not I won't.

Your profile is bare I wouldn't respond.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
8 weeks ago

Coventry

I was a single guy on scene before I met Mrs Misfit. So I have a few experiences of being a single/lone guy on the scene as well as seeing it from a couples side as well as a lone woman's side (from Mrs Misfits point of veiw).

First it's difficult, simple as that. Which can be demoralising and lead toa real blow to the self esteem of someone who is not in a good place within them self. However it's important not no take it as a negative reflection on you. There's plenty of decent gents who don't get no where. If the site is doing more damage to you than good then go.

A few things I would point out:

This is not the best place if you're just seeking casual no strings hook ups and not so much the wider swinger scene/group activities. For that as a single male I had far more success in the vanilla world and vanilla sites. Because this is a swinging site and a lot of the women out there looking for no strings who are not swingers or have any intrest in the scene or to come on a site like this.

Sometimes you are just at the mercy of timing. Sometimes to can make contact at just the right time to be noticed. Sometimes not. For example you may message when someone is not particularly looking and even get lost in a sea of winks and messages. On the other hand you may make contact at a time you get noticed immediately and they are actively seeking. After all a lot of the time we've busy and not actively seeking. On the point of timing it's OK to messages again a few weeks in the future. One of my successful meets was off a second try. She just didn't see me first time around. Just don't harass or keep firing messages.

Messages are important to some extent but profile is King. Golden rule with a message is what you say is isn't massively important. What's more important is you don't put the wrong things and have a good profile. We've had some really good messages but the profile not for us. We've had some of the classics fuax pas and horrible messages and thus a no regardless of profile. Then we've had a simple wink or hello message from an awesome profile and it's been a yes from us. So yes to care with your messages but your profile and photos is what sells you the most.

As to clubs that's mixed advise. First clubs are not a wonder cure. However some like myself find advantage being able to talk and flirt face to face. Both easier to sell ones self in the real world and to communicate and read others. I think if clubs work for single men that's very much down to the individual. I would say give it a try. We mainly swing in the club scene and we know a few guys who really thrive and clean up on the club scene. In our experience the guy who do well tend to do well in clubs tend to be sociable, great personality and comfortable in her own skin. Although being easy on the eye doesn't harm the guys who do well tend to be a range of average looking blokes and sizes.

Just learn to accept that people are fickle. That's something common to us all. Sometimes you can just say the wrong thing (no blame on yourself). Or their life circumstances change sort notice (life happens). Or as harsh as it sounds they find a more attractive offer (we all have limited time, want the best with that time). There is an element of competition, especially from the male experience. Unfortunately we can only control ourselves not the stuff that's out of our hands and ultimately no one owes us their body despite how much has been invested.

And of course a break through can help within the swinger scene. And this is where the club/party/organised social event scene can really help. Good verifications from established and trusted accounts always helps. There's also an element of word of mouth within the scene, especially in the club and party scene. Some single guys do get recommended to others. Leading to other opportunities and party invites.

In sort it's rough as a single male and all you can do is your best and it's not without lots of effort. But do things right and even make a breakthrough and it is possible to do ok. I had relative success as a single and there are other men that do. You may even find what you're not looking for or expecting like when my first meet with Mrs Misfit turned into something so much more.

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By *inceIlkestonMan
7 weeks ago

Ilkeston

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

Well your profile is hidden so that won't work

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By *uzzleMan
7 weeks ago

Hastings

A well written profile without verifications of meets sends women running for the hills. Some women/couples won't meet without published verifcations.

As has been said, you've hid your profile, you've knowingly and willingly done this, it doesn't happen by accident.

At the moment, you've got more chance of plaiting fog then getting a meet on here. Mind you even with a fully completed profile and pictures, your chances aren't much higher!

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By *weetRollMan
7 weeks ago

Angus/Dundee/Perth

"We always reply even if it's a no thanks.

But our query is this, why are all the single men on here ?

23 year old here, ill have a crack at this.

Firstly, dating apps are shite. I have been on tinder for like 3 months and not got a single match. Not one. I'm also frequently seeing the same accounts.

Without matching, I'm not even allowed to message women on it. So its a boring scroll app to me, I don't even have the motivation to use it anymore. Many other conventional dating sites are the same.

I'm not willing to pay their egregious monthly prices (granted tinder is not the worst one)

For additional feature that from what I've read in reviews, don't make much of a difference to the overall experience anyway.

Fab is great in the sense that I can at the very least message people I'm interested without facing a paywall. And when I do decide pay to support the site, the price is a very reasonable 5 quid a month

Other sites can ask for over 15 or even 20 quid a month just to be able to use their app or message people. They are all just crap.

Chasing skirt in the pub? The current tension between men and women relating to harassment and accusations, I don't want to approach a local girl I know and she doesn't take kindly to my approach because she is just there to have fun and proceeds to create drama with her friends about me.

Also, in my mind people generally go to clubs to spend time with friends, dance, etc. I feel like id more often than not be an annoyance if I tried to chat girls up. I'd make lots of friends if I went at it from that angle, but I already have a lot of friends, I'm not looking for more platonic friends.

I also kind of dislike the club environment for the most part with the loud music and all that, would much prefer a relaxed scene where I could have a nice chat with someone.

Its also harder to be discrete and for me that's pretty important, even as a single male. The place I'm at has a relatively small population and Its very likely that someone I know could be at the club and that would create some awkward moments. I'd really not want to be someone who gets attention that way and have people I know approach me asking, was it really you who approached 'x' at the club a few days ago? She's been telling x, y, z about you.

No just no.

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By *ilverfox for youMan
7 weeks ago

Hull

Waiting game I’m afraid !

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By *weetRollMan
7 weeks ago

Angus/Dundee/Perth

I'm still on the vanilla dating sites, but have got no issue with using swinger sites as well. So long as they welcome single males, then there is no harm in using em too.

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By *eahxocallumCouple
7 weeks ago

studley

Don't just have a penis pic, don't be sleazy, and try to be somewhat normal.

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By *ust Ms LovinWoman
7 weeks ago

birmingham

1. Ref the profile shows you read it

2. Change your age limit would you really fuck a 99 year

3. Don’t say you can accom if you don’t

4. Get yourself to clubs - this is a lifestyle

5. Profile pic

6. Don’t copy and paste it’s obvious and we will know

7. Expect a social first - I would never say I’d fuck someone off pictures

A simple hi will never get you a reply not Exactly a conversation starter

Disclaimer - just my personal opinion

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By *uzzleMan
7 weeks ago

Hastings

Some people just lack confidence and are extremely shy, I am one of these people, in short I am one of lifes loners and a recluse.

I would never dream of going to a Fab social or a club, even if i were accompanied.

In the old days of Craigslist, I could reply to a personal add, go round and f**K a blokes Mrs while he watched and go home without giving it a second thought. Ask me to have a social first though, f**k that no way!

I don't drink, date, dance or smoke so Fab is my only hope.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
7 weeks ago

cahoots

"We always reply even if it's a no thanks.

But our query is this, why are all the single men on here ?

With you on this

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By *oxy jWoman
7 weeks ago

taunton somerset

your a guy so simple maths will tell you why its going to be very very hard or impossible the percentages of guys ver couples/women is massive..

add in lots of couples/women profiles are fake aka men pretending

add in many couples just meet couples and women

add in many women are seeking just couples or women

add in many couples /women acually dont meet at all or very rarely

add in many couples/women are clubs only

and all that is way before we get to sexual attraction which will rule 99% of men out str8 away and then the communication / messaging that will let most guys down ...

so as you can see its very hard for guys and impossible for many ... its a select/reject scene

you will get guys pop up saying things like theres someone for everyone but the truth is theres not as said simple maths will tell you that ...

however it seems that some guys are getting success when they go to clubs for some its feet on the ladder not all but some .... i would not want to be a guy on todays scene ..its alway been hard for guys but now well i feel sorry for guys well some as alot will shit there own bed ...

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By *weetRollMan
7 weeks ago

Angus/Dundee/Perth

"We always reply even if it's a no thanks.

But our query is this, why are all the single men on here ?

With you on this

If you're curious as well, read my response to her earlier in the thread.

A short answer is that conventional dating sites are not all they are cracked up to be, they are worse than they were in the past. Poor matching algorithms, too many restrictions, too expensive, low potential for those in less populated areas or all of the above.

Moreover, some of us want to be discrete in a manner that actively going to clubs wont allow, many single men also value discreetness.

For many single men, we don't use fab as a replacement for those other common sites but in addition to them. Not all women use tinder, nor bumble, nor 3fun, nor fab. Logically speaking it makes sense to get involved in as many communities as possible to maximise chances, so long as they are welcoming. Which Fab seems to be for the most part though there is a LOT of tension and dissatisfaction with single men

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By *oomerangBangMan
7 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 06/11/24 17:58:56]

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By *weetRollMan
7 weeks ago

Angus/Dundee/Perth

"We always reply even if it's a no thanks.

But our query is this, why are all the single men on here ?

With you on this

I should add that I don't agree with the complaining. It doesn't improve a mans chances nor would it change anything.

Its a venting exercise which some men do out of frustration or confusion, but its more helpful to ask for advice than just moan. But hey some people just want to vent at times lol

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By *WANDTGCouple
7 weeks ago

Borough of Greenwich

"We always reply even if it's a no thanks.

But our query is this, why are all the single men on here ?

23 year old here, ill have a crack at this.

Firstly, dating apps are shite. I have been on tinder for like 3 months and not got a single match. Not one. I'm also frequently seeing the same accounts.

Without matching, I'm not even allowed to message women on it. So its a boring scroll app to me, I don't even have the motivation to use it anymore. Many other conventional dating sites are the same.

I'm not willing to pay their egregious monthly prices (granted tinder is not the worst one)

For additional feature that from what I've read in reviews, don't make much of a difference to the overall experience anyway.

Other sites can ask for over 15 or even 20 quid a month just to be able to use their app or message people. They are all just crap.

I also kind of dislike the club environment for the most part with the loud music and all that, would much prefer a relaxed scene where I could have a nice chat with someone.

No just no.

Fair comments, but even as a 50 something I've chatted to and been hit on in a dance venue, so it is a possibility. As for apps I've also had success, so again, options are there. It's just bewildering to us as to why so many youngsters want to meet people who could be their parents or even grandparents.

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By *itygamesMan
7 weeks ago

your just one of 35,000

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Central

It's important to make realistic expectations if a single man.

Most people are not mutually compatible with most other people, irrespective of gender etc

This most messages won't reach someone who is compatible. You can only make your profile as accurate as it can be and to give people what they want from seeing you, to make a good decision on your suitability

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By *neeyedwillieMan
7 weeks ago

Darlington

Fabs a waste of time. The sites 75% single guys.

It's the metaphorical equivalent of 1000 fisherment converging on a pond with 100 fish in it hoping they'll all catch a fish.

Ain't worth the time or effort.

Go outside and talk to real women. Go to clubs or socials.

Anything but waste time and effort here.

I'm not bashing fab either. It's just a tool to.meet people at the end of the day but if what youre doing isn't working, change what you're doing.

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By *oiluvfunMan
7 weeks ago

Penrith

"Fabs a waste of time. The sites 75% single guys.

It's the metaphorical equivalent of 1000 fisherment converging on a pond with 100 fish in it hoping they'll all catch a fish.

Ain't worth the time or effort.

Go outside and talk to real women. Go to clubs or socials.

Anything but waste time and effort here.

I'm not bashing fab either. It's just a tool to.meet people at the end of the day but if what youre doing isn't working, change what you're doing. "

Pmsl! The difference of experiences in this wonderful side to our lives is incredible!

I have 3 new solo female meets (through Fab only) lined up, from the last two weeks, and an offer from a new couple dropped in my inbox just this morning. These on top of my regular play friends, so time to align diaries, it’s looking like a very busy run up to Xmas……

And all from just using Fab, which I can do from the comfort of my home, and all totally free of charge to use this site (if I didn’t decide to be a site supporter)

Compare that to, let’s say; the 6 times I made the effort to drive over to Club f. Best part of 4 hours driving, there and back, an average of £30 entry fee, and not a single connection made with any of the so-called friendly locals……

I’ll stick with Fab thank you very much, but do agree with the point you made above; if something isn’t working for you, change it. Worked for me

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By *weetRollMan
7 weeks ago

Angus/Dundee/Perth

"Fabs a waste of time. The sites 75% single guys.

It's the metaphorical equivalent of 1000 fisherment converging on a pond with 100 fish in it hoping they'll all catch a fish.

Ain't worth the time or effort.

Go outside and talk to real women. Go to clubs or socials.

Anything but waste time and effort here.

I'm not bashing fab either. It's just a tool to.meet people at the end of the day but if what youre doing isn't working, change what you're doing.

Pmsl! The difference of experiences in this wonderful side to our lives is incredible!

And all from just using Fab, which I can do from the comfort of my home, and all totally free of charge to use this site (if I didn’t decide to be a site supporter)

I’ll stick with Fab thank you very much, but do agree with the point you made above; if something isn’t working for you, change it. Worked for me

You are a veteran on this site Sir, well played.

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By *outhlondondudeMan
7 weeks ago

london

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

Please consider going to sex clubs and swinging social events. Maybe consider why you are on here. There has to be easier ways of getting sex, for example on dating sites. This isn’t easy. You have to really want it, to work at it. Unless you are clearly what the majority of couples want, then it will take take more time to be a success on here. Good luck.

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By *neeyedwillieMan
7 weeks ago

Darlington

"Fabs a waste of time. The sites 75% single guys.

It's the metaphorical equivalent of 1000 fisherment converging on a pond with 100 fish in it hoping they'll all catch a fish.

Ain't worth the time or effort.

Go outside and talk to real women. Go to clubs or socials.

Anything but waste time and effort here.

I'm not bashing fab either. It's just a tool to.meet people at the end of the day but if what youre doing isn't working, change what you're doing.

Pmsl! The difference of experiences in this wonderful side to our lives is incredible!

And all from just using Fab, which I can do from the comfort of my home, and all totally free of charge to use this site (if I didn’t decide to be a site supporter)

I’ll stick with Fab thank you very much, but do agree with the point you made above; if something isn’t working for you, change it. Worked for me

See Club F is my club. I'm there on average 3 Saturdays out of 4. Sometimes with my wife, sometimes with one if my single lady freinds or even on my own. I have a lot of freinds there and I'm never alone. Even if I don't bother dressing down I have a good night with good company. Better than going to a pub imo.

But on Fab...most messages I sent where ignored (and that's polite thought out messages, no dick.pics either I'll add) and no one ever messages me so...what works for.you dosnt work for.me and vice versa.

But to be fair...where I live is a bit of a dead zone (and thats a complaint i hear off freinds in my area as well) so if I have to travel 30 plus miles it might as well be to the club.

Teesside, Durham and Cleveland to be fair, a bit quiet for Fab accounts when compared to other areas.

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By *tockingsstephTV/TS
7 weeks ago

northampton

I always reply to single men

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By *oiluvfunMan
7 weeks ago

Penrith

"Fabs a waste of time. The sites 75% single guys.

It's the metaphorical equivalent of 1000 fisherment converging on a pond with 100 fish in it hoping they'll all catch a fish.

Ain't worth the time or effort.

Go outside and talk to real women. Go to clubs or socials.

Anything but waste time and effort here.

I'm not bashing fab either. It's just a tool to.meet people at the end of the day but if what youre doing isn't working, change what you're doing.

Pmsl! The difference of experiences in this wonderful side to our lives is incredible!

And all from just using Fab, which I can do from the comfort of my home, and all totally free of charge to use this site (if I didn’t decide to be a site supporter)

I’ll stick with Fab thank you very much, but do agree with the point you made above; if something isn’t working for you, change it. Worked for me

See Club F is my club. I'm there on average 3 Saturdays out of 4. Sometimes with my wife, sometimes with one if my single lady friends or even on my own. I have a lot of friends there and I'm never alone. Even if I don't bother dressing down I have a good night with good company. Better than going to a pub imo.

But on Fab...most messages I sent where ignored (and that's polite thought out messages, no dick.pics either I'll add) and no one ever messages me so...what works for.you doesn't work for.me and vice versa.

But to be fair...where I live is a bit of a dead zone (and that's a complaint I hear off friends in my area as well) so if I have to travel 30 plus miles it might as well be to the club.

Teesside, Durham and Cleveland to be fair, a bit quiet for Fab accounts when compared to other areas. "

That's quite amusing to hear, when I think of the day rate hotel fun I've shared in Middlesbrough, with a local lady I met through the Forum, along with a regular friend who travels from Darlington to meet me, and I have a new lady from Stockton primed lol......

In all honesty, if there was a club within 30 miles of where I live, I probably would visit more often, but therein lies a great benefit in my eyes; because there's no club locally, I genuinely believe people put more effort in to using Fab 'properly'. I don't live in a heavily populated area, but I've done very well through Fab over the years

Potentially, if I'd chosen 'better' events at clubs, I may have felt more welcome, wanted to visit more often, and made some genuine connections in that scene. But my experiences could generally be described as lacklustre, unwelcoming, and a waste of an evening. Henceforth, I would never recommend the club scene as a solo male to a mate...

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By *ig busty boobs300Couple
7 weeks ago

Stratford upon avon

What we find is single men either dismiss the man in the relationship yes granted you want the wife but he is the one letting you so he is part of it or go too quick which can be off putting. we love mmf but trying to find a bloke close who can accommodate and doesn't go wierd is hard but I'm sure they are out there.

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By (user no longer on site)
6 weeks ago

Some of the messages I receive are ridiculous why would I bother

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By *ee69Man
6 weeks ago

glasgow

You can only say hi and be you , most girls won’t bother but it’s there choice and you wouldn’t chat to someone you no like the look off it’s better to be normal and chat too a few folk if you can than be a perv or dick

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By *enelope2UWoman
6 weeks ago

Fife

Read the profile

Only message if compatible..

the end..

most single men don't listen or care to do those 2 simple things so of course they then moan.

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By *enelope2UWoman
6 weeks ago

Fife

"Some of the messages I receive are ridiculous why would I bother "

I think they are unaware of the preview of ALL messages. You can generally see if it's worth a response.

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By *r SensualMan
6 weeks ago

London

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

Easiest way to get past the metaphorical “gate keeper” that comes with messaging is to just bypass all that and go to clubs, parties and organising socials to meet people.

Don’t have to bother questioning whether there’s an attraction based on characteristics from an online profile that way. People can take you at face value and vice versa.

128 (published) verifications I have, all of which are folk I’ve met in person first and connected with on here afterwards.

Even in spite of the above, with a relatively decent well written profile & tasteful pics, I find a lot of my messages go ignored or unread.

Women and couples are just unresponsive in general on here for the most part no matter how well written your message is.

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By *izandpaulCouple
6 weeks ago

merseyside

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

About 75% of people on here are timewasters when it comes to real life meets, so best to put yourself in the arena of non timewasters.

You need to go to a place where people actually meet in real life, not online.

BTW, its not just couples and single women who are timewasters, loads of single men are too, so why put yourself in the timewaster group.

Look for a social in your area or a club and get yourself along.

Be yourself, smile and don't be a limpet.

Use the first meet as a trial, you will always live to fight another day and don't get pissed.

We know a group of great guys who are often at parties and most of them had invites because they put themselves around not just hid behind a keyboard.

Give it a whirl, its great fun.

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By *ondonlad_88Man
6 weeks ago

Here and There...

Just stay polite, patient and classy and eventually the lovely ladies will notice.

They are a good bunch

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By *londebiguyMan
6 weeks ago

Southport

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

I let interested people message me.

I am very relaxed about it all.

Anyone who wants to will message and chat with you if you are friendly and approachable I think.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
6 weeks ago

Leeds

"Fabs a waste of time. The sites 75% single guys.

It's the metaphorical equivalent of 1000 fisherment converging on a pond with 100 fish in it hoping they'll all catch a fish.

Swinging women have sex with multiple men, not just one fisherman

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By *uncouple153Couple
6 weeks ago

Abergavenny

The first line or two of your message can be read without opening it. Don't waste those lines .

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By *allySlinkyWoman
6 weeks ago

Leeds

"Thanks guys, I’ll try to make a bit of an effort with my profile "

I suggest you crop your profile pic to remove the black bar at the top and the emoji. Then we would be able to see more of your sexy torso.

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By *ambridgezwingerMan
6 weeks ago

Cambridge

Possibly a good idea to have other interests away from a site and dip into it now & then. This may lead to a diminution in disappointment levels and/or a pleasant surprise...

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By *ambridgezwingerMan
6 weeks ago

Cambridge

Excellent post 👍🏼 :--)

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By *ambridgezwingerMan
6 weeks ago

Cambridge

Balance of Fab + Club attendance could be beneficial...

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By *ambridgezwingerMan
6 weeks ago

Cambridge

Health is (potentially) wealth (not necessarily financial), more a case of individuals looking after themselves in various aspects of life. An hour of cycling or lifting weights may soon diminish being ignored or blocked on a website. Not saying it's a panacea, but may help not to dedicate too much emotional investment in individuals one hasn't met (yet)...

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By *lla_eastWoman
6 weeks ago

Manchester

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet?

It's likely neither.

The biggest mistake people make is putting more effort into a message than they do their profile. 🤷‍♂️"

^^This ^^

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By *enelope2UWoman
6 weeks ago

Fife

Came back to see if the profile was updated to reflect comments but...

...not quite

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By (user no longer on site)
5 weeks ago

I have replied to couple of single men no conversation so I just deleted

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By *WB85Man
5 weeks ago

Staffordshire

"I have replied to couple of single men no conversation so I just deleted "

I guess that's their loss and someone else's gain.

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By *exy Black JenWoman
5 weeks ago

London/Eastbourne weekends

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet?

It's likely neither.

The biggest mistake people make is putting more effort into a message than they do their profile. 🤷‍♂️"

I agree...a lot of single male profiles have less than 8 words???

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By *exy Black JenWoman
5 weeks ago

London/Eastbourne weekends

"Yep. A lot of messages don’t even get read. It’s because it’s a cock fest on here and then women get absolutely hammered with messages and this also allows them to be picky (understandably and rightly)

Any tips ladies

Yes...a sensible profile consisting of more than..'looking for a f**k'...just be yourself, and anything other than c**k pics over the toilet from 17 angles..lol..

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By *eepConnectionMan
5 weeks ago

Bath

Im always a little surprised hearing about guys struggling to get messages from women and couples here. Well apart from those that are clearly niche.

Keep at it tho, im sure things will turn round.

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By *he maker of funMan
5 weeks ago

Near the Park

This is cock fest.

Try to message with a thought for message receiver.

If you are messaging a single girl acknowledge she gets bombarded with messages and be compassionate for the effort of receiving so many messages.

Ensure your message stands out from the full inbox of messages

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By *aldy321Man
5 weeks ago

Huddersfield

It is bordering on impossible. I would like to know what the ratio of single men to everyone else on this site is but guess it's massive! It is worth persevering though. Out of the hundreds of unanswered messages I have sent I have made very good friends with two couples. Why they responded and get on with me and others don't see my messages never mind respond is beyond me although I'm truly grateful! Hang on in OP it eventually becomes less frustrating !!

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By *jonesMan
5 weeks ago

Plymouth

I've had great fun on fab

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By *endalshaggersCouple
5 weeks ago

Kendal

The majority of blokes are here for one of two reasons:

1) They think it's a fuck-me-quick site where you'll get rewarded for very little effort.

2) They realise they can talk to other like minded men about their fantasies, tell tall tales, etc.

If you're not getting replies, it's quite obvious unfortunately either the people your're messaging don't find you attractive, aren't interested in your profile, or simply don't actually want a single male to join them. When most couples are actually seeking a single female, or other couples to swap with, then that reduces your chances even further. Those who may want to meet a single male - females, or couples looking for a single male - are absolutely bombarded with messages daily. Your're lucky to get yours read, in truth, and most get immediately deleted as there's so many men who don't put effort in. Unfortunately for you you may see your messages getting caught up in the mass deletion, but if not, then as I've said above will apply.

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By *ilf and old fartCouple
5 weeks ago

Between Ely and Mildenhall

You have only been on here 9 weeks, that's a nano second of time in fab world for single guys, be patient, it's not a shag fest on here with women lining up waiting to get fucked. Understand that for every single woman or couple on here, there are potential 100 single guys trying to get lucky.

A simple example is if you were to do a search on here, using the same age range on your profile, for single guys within a 5 mile radius of Exton, it will show that there are 300+ guys and the same search for women show only 32 women.

Patience is a necessity for a single guy on fab.

You really need to make your profile interesting. You need to remember that your profile is your shop window. You have to sell yourself to others through it.

So the more interesting/eye-catching it is, the more people will look at it.

At the moment, your profile says nothing about who you are or what you are looking for. It does exactly nothing for you.

Rewrite it and read it as if you were a couple looking for a male. If you have doubts about it, then modify it until you think it is right.

Change your profile picture as it doesn't do anything for you. Admittedly it's far better than many others but it needs improvement. Add more photos but don't put hundreds of cock pics on your profile but add at least one so people can see what they are getting.

Women like to see what they are getting.

No cock photo=no interest from others.

Don't put photos on your profile that show an untidy room or floor, as people will doubt your hygiene then on the basis that if you have a dirty house, you will be too. It may not necessarily be true, but that's how it will be perceived.

Carry out some changes, have Patience and sooner or later, you'll get lucky

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By *ondonlad_88Man
5 weeks ago

Here and There...

It's a brutal world fab... I genuinely find it amazing when I get a reply. Let alone anything else. You just need to be prepared to listen and be patient

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By *sLillyMrWolfeCouple
5 weeks ago

near you...

Think of it this way: you're selling yourself in a busy market. Verifications and photos of something other than your cock are a minimum for us. You need to stand out or you will be ignored x

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By *he James gangCouple
5 weeks ago

NEWTOWNABBEY

Let's call a spade a spade. You were informed 3 weeks ago, your bio was lacking. I'm assuming it hasn't changed because it looks very poor now. Your only pic shows a skinny body and your bio is non existent. Why post your problem and then ignore the advice.

As the usual advice says, look at other successful profiles and then you'll get an idea of what to do. No effort in = a nil response!

If your messages are like your bio then you'll get nowhere. If we got a 'hows you' message and took one look at your profile, it would be deleted immediately. Now, you may look like Brad Pitt but you'll get nowhere fast. I'll shout it, take decent pics as that's anyone's only frame of reference! Other than that, go to PDI if you want your nat king cole.

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By *ondonlad_88Man
5 weeks ago

Here and There...

"Let's call a spade a spade. You were informed 3 weeks ago, your bio was lacking. I'm assuming it hasn't changed because it looks very poor now. Your only pic shows a skinny body and your bio is non existent. Why post your problem and then ignore the advice.

As the usual advice says, look at other successful profiles and then you'll get an idea of what to do. No effort in = a nil response!

Ouch... brutal

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By *olinOfBathMan
5 weeks ago

Corsham

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

Fab has hundreds of threads on this, but there's no point in directing you to them. You've ignored the advice in your responses here, so you won't be paying attention anywhere else.

So, am I really qualified to be so harshly critical?

Read my verifications.

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By *uphoria_HubMan
5 weeks ago

London

I have the same issue. I never send harsh or abrasive messages. And I never get a reply and I am often blocked by black females, literally, after sending one message.

I honestly don't know what I am doing wrong

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By *iss_Juicy79Woman
5 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Cause women and couples get bombarded with so much shit decent ones struggle to get seen

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By *jonesMan
5 weeks ago

Plymouth

"Cause women and couples get bombarded with so much shit decent ones struggle to get seen"

I know you get a lot of crap messages..I never understood why you don't put your filters on and do your own looking for a nice guy ...

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By *harAndBryCouple
5 weeks ago

Peterborough / Stamford

"I know you get a lot of crap messages..I never understood why you don't put your filters on and do your own looking for a nice guy ..."

We tried that - but we'd send messages detailing who we were, what we were looking for and what we could offer and nine times out of ten we got one word messages back and no conversation. At least waiting for guys to message first gives us a bit more of an indication of how we'll get on from their message.

(Bry)

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By *ymClassDropoutMan
5 weeks ago

Berkshire

All I will say is the following - regarding these kind of ‘I get nowhere’ type messages.

You, OP, are the shop. You are the goods, the merchandise, the goods on offer.

The profile is merely the shop window.

I feel far too many people on here, when getting little success, think they need to tinker with the shop window rather than asking how can I improve the shop.

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By *he Silver FuxMan
5 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

"I know you get a lot of crap messages..I never understood why you don't put your filters on and do your own looking for a nice guy ...

(Bry)"

So you’re just lazy swingers then? 😂 Rather than keep messaging in an attempt to find a good guy (like most single men have to, for months, years even) you’re going to just wait for the right one to pop up…

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By *r SensualMan
5 weeks ago

London

"Cause women and couples get bombarded with so much shit decent ones struggle to get seen

I know you get a lot of crap messages..I never understood why you don't put your filters on and do your own looking for a nice guy ..."

You wouldn’t know how many of my couples and lady friends I’ve told to start doing this… it usually falls on deaf ears and is followed up with an excuse (similar to one made by a couple on this thread) as to why they can’t or won’t 🤷🏾‍♂️

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By *att212Man
5 weeks ago

Formby

I was just about to ask this myself!!!!! I just feel that sex is not available to me. I would say I'm ok looking and fairly regular ,but like yourself....absolutely no interest whatsoever, other than from TVs or men. Extremely depressing isn't it....

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By *ristolmark87Man
5 weeks ago

Southsea

It can be hard on here but i say keep trying and be genuie as lot of fakes as you never know just dont give up even tho it can be tempting to

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By *ucka39Man
5 weeks ago

Newcastle

The volume of men to women can only differ per location and not as a whole

Then it's effort, how much you've made on your profile and who may find it appealing/interesting for wanting to possibly go further

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By *WB85Man
5 weeks ago

Staffordshire

Here's my advice....I've been doing this for a couple of years now (mainly with my partner and also with solo accounts)

Use the forums. Get your username seen by others.

Only message someone once, if you get no reply, they aren't interested....it's not an invitation for more messages.

Find local social events. You have a far better chance at social events. Compared to the women to men ratio on here.

Go to clubs, be chatty but not clingy.

It can be really bad for your mental health investing lots of time into the swinger world and getting no responses. Don't make it the most important thing in your social life.

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By *ir-spunk-alotMan
5 weeks ago

Southern England

"Hi guys, I’m struggling to get replies after sending a nice little intro message.

Is it that there are so many single men on here or have I just not found anyone who is interested in me yet? "

My advice would be to build a bridge and get over it. Move onto the next. Men to women ratio is so unbalanced, so no need to feel deflated.

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By (user no longer on site)
4 weeks ago

Its hard to find couples that actually want to meet too, that are also to our liking. So don't think it's just single men struggling. Meeting in person in a club is where we've had far more success so maybe you should try that?

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By *TWboyMan
4 weeks ago

Norwich

Very good advice.

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By *ijay_AnansiMan
4 weeks ago

Wembley

As the usual advice says, look at other successful profiles and then you'll get an idea of what to do. No effort in = a nil response!

What does a successful make profile look like?

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By *olinOfBathMan
4 weeks ago

Corsham

What does a successful make profile look like?"

Like mine.

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By *he James gangCouple
5 days ago

NEWTOWNABBEY

As the usual advice says, look at other successful profiles and then you'll get an idea of what to do. No effort in = a nil response!

What does a successful make profile look like?"

Look at single guy profiles with recent verifications. Id wager their profiles aren't shitty.

Ahh, you say, I can't get verified. Then go to clubs and socials.

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By *ack again100Man
5 days ago

Tamworth

It took me nearly 10 months to get a meet with a couple.

They then invited me to a gangbang and from there I got some verifications, which as a single man are like gold dust.

Going to socials is a great way to meet people as well

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By *enelope2UWoman
5 days ago

Fife

As the usual advice says, look at other successful profiles and then you'll get an idea of what to do. No effort in = a nil response!

Ouch... brutal

Accurate truths sting

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By *anonfire96Man
5 days ago

Mansfield

Possibly the same reason lots of under 30 single women are on here. Lots want an uncomplicated time I suppose.

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By *laisir erotiqueCouple
5 days ago

Northampton

Most Guys on here don't have clue they don't read a profile in full so don't understand what sort of exprience is wanted, they think its ok to send a one line message or even worse Hi hows you !.

There are hundreds of guys on here so my advice is read the profile and understand what is wanted ie Bi or Straight or whatever else make your message stand out from the rest, if you don't make an effort you wont inspire anyone to meet you.

By you way I've been a single guy on here and now I'm in a relationship with a lady who was also on here.

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By *on_departCouple
5 days ago

West Midlands

We’re actively looking for single men, but honestly my impression is that most men are extremely bad at selling themselves.

My advice would be:

- Write a profile that’s a decent length but not an essay.

- Sell yourself - it’s like writing a CV, you need to understand what people are looking for and demonstrate how you meet those things

- Be matter of fact about what you are looking for, this is a hook up site, people want to know whether you’re on the same page in terms of what they are looking for (but don’t be overtly sexualised)

- Invest in some good photos - grainy poorly angled photo of you on the sofa ain’t gonna cut it, screenshot of you from a wedding ain’t gonna cut it, just a sea of dick picks doesn’t tell me anything about you and is offputting to lots of people

- If you’re going to message someone, you get one shot so make it count. Show them you’ve read their profile and explain why you think you meet the brief of what they are looking for. Don’t message again if they don’t reply, you’re just digging yourself into a hole.

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By *laisir erotiqueCouple
5 days ago

Northampton

Like you being a bisexual couple how many straight guys do you get saying I'm bi really but I'm to scared to put it on my profile really get a life, they use it as just as an excuse to fuck the lady of a the couple and are so thick they think its going to work

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