FabSwingers.com forum: Advice for a shy person wanting to start.

By *omfortzone27 OP Man
39 weeks ago

Cleveleys

Ended up losing virginity at 29 and I've been sexually awoken so to speak. Proper body self conscious but looking for someone understanding.

I've got toys and I love to please, quite daunting as I'm shy to meet but hopefully someone fits the bill

I've had a few chats but most want to meet immediately and I want to get to know them. Maybe I'm in the wrong place but I like the fact everyone is so sexually open on here.

That's how I am. I wanna try everything.

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By *ucka39Man
39 weeks ago

Newcastle

Hiya op

Patience is the key and it's always interesting to get to know someone prior without being rushed. The sexual side of things become a little bit more

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By *omfortzone27 OP Man
39 weeks ago

Cleveleys

Yeah I like connection. I'm only attracted when I have the connection and then I like kissing, hand holding, massage and stuff. But it seems hard to forge a connection on here, or maybe I'm just not very attractive to start the conversation.

But I'm only after sex and coffee dates, so not wanting tinder etc

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By *orthernJayMan
39 weeks ago

Lancaster

Just sex and coffee dates, you’ve come to the right place then!!!

Genuinely, delete your account save yourself the head fuck; any confidence issues will be magnified x-fold when you’re ignored and deleted.

It’s not you, it’s Fab in 2024.

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By *ueerKinkyCoupleCouple
39 weeks ago

Cambridge (She/They And They/Them)

Hi there

Welcome. It’s very nice that you’re starting to find the things you want in life. You seem like a nice, open person.

Given that you’re a bit kinky (sex toys etc) I wonder if you’d enjoy a “munch”. This is a social for people into kink and BDSM. Some are very friendly to newbies and you could get to know people who might be into similar stuff.

Fab can be tough for single guys. You’d need to think about going along to socials and events too to get yourself known. It’s normal to face a lot of rejection due to uneven numbers of men and women. You’d need to feel robust enough to handle that.

On the plus side, you come across well and you’ve written a nice profile and taken some nice pics which is better than many people.

Join in the forums too.

I wish you lots and lots of luck.

Dee

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"Just sex and coffee dates, you’ve come to the right place then!!!

Genuinely, delete your account save yourself the head fuck; any confidence issues will be magnified x-fold when you’re ignored and deleted.

It’s not you, it’s Fab in 2024."

This place isn't for everyone and you might be better suited to finding what you're looking for via other websites or something like speed dating.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
39 weeks ago

cahoots

"Ended up losing virginity at 29 and I've been sexually awoken so to speak. Proper body self conscious but looking for someone understanding.

I've got toys and I love to please, quite daunting as I'm shy to meet but hopefully someone fits the bill

I've had a few chats but most want to meet immediately and I want to get to know them. Maybe I'm in the wrong place but I like the fact everyone is so sexually open on here.

That's how I am. I wanna try everything."

If the people you're chatting to want to meet immediately why not do that, go for a coffee and chat in person. It's the only real way to get to know someone and then you can take things further if both of you want to.

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By *oupleSouthEast69Couple
39 weeks ago

brighton

I see a lot of men on here who clearly want a girlfriend even if they aren't ready to admit it. You want a connection, getting to know someone slowly, someone who will build your confidence and explore sexual things with you. What you want is a girlfriend :/

Loads of women are both sexually open and also looking for a relationship. That's how you have so many couples on here :D Having a relationship and a banging sex life aren't mutually exclusive and honestly the sex you have within a relationship where you're able to be open and liberated is 1000x better than casual sex.

My man is very sexually successful on traditional dating sites (yes even being totally upfront about what he's offering!) but gave up on fab as a solo man a long time ago. Fab is brutal for solo men. My advice is get on dating sites and seek a nice woman who is into exploring sex with you.

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By *oxy jWoman
38 weeks ago

somerset

im going to be blunt but dont take it personally swinging is a open minded scene where people flirt if the attraction is their that means most will have lots of confidence in themselves and look for confidence ...

ive said this becausde as a man your already in the ''most wont get a meet'' club due to the high percentage of men to how few women and couples who really play there are ....

not trying to put you off but you will really have to work on your confidence ..see it all the time quite shy reserved men getting no where .... maybe build up a bit of self belief and vist a club and see for yourself if its a scene you can go with ....alot of people cant ...good luck

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By *elkieWoman
38 weeks ago

Durham

So: even with dating, I want to get eyes on someone fairly early on to see how we click in person. I want in person connection, and I don’t build that well via text. I do best meeting in person though, rather than online.

Your best option is likely to be to go to a swingers club and build friendships. Some of those friends might be people you want to fuck, but if not, you’ll have a load of new friends. Swingers clubs are typically full of introverts, so you’ll be in good company.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

"Ended up losing virginity at 29 and I've been sexually awoken so to speak. Proper body self conscious but looking for someone understanding.

I've got toys and I love to please, quite daunting as I'm shy to meet but hopefully someone fits the bill

I've had a few chats but most want to meet immediately and I want to get to know them. Maybe I'm in the wrong place but I like the fact everyone is so sexually open on here.

That's how I am. I wanna try everything."

I think your page is open and honest what you see is what you get which in my opinion is great !

Some woman may even find it a turn in to take a shy newbie under their wing so you may be someone’s kink !

There’s nothing wrong with trying to build a connection up but like someone else said on here build it up by having a face to face social only meet coffee/tea the more of these you do the more confident you will feel instead of building up thru txt messages and fab messages.

Go for it !

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

A turn on *

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By *helengthoftroubleMan
38 weeks ago

London

"So: even with dating, I want to get eyes on someone fairly early on to see how we click in person. I want in person connection, and I don’t build that well via text. I do best meeting in person though, rather than online.

And when you do go make sure you own it but don’t be weird lol

Similar boat as you but I lost mine in year eight lol

Just throw yourself in the deep end if it works it works if it don’t then fuck it init

Good luck

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By *helengthoftroubleMan
38 weeks ago

London

Scrap that, i just read your post again and we are not in a similar boat still lol but personally I wanna get to know more people so yeah my point still stands just go for it

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By *enhamhoopMan
38 weeks ago

Denham

I would recommend you get yourself to one of the 2 clubs in Blackpool and treat as though you are going to a pub to socialise. Try and be polite and friendly and no doubt as you're "fresh meat" someone will pounce on you.

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