FabSwingers.com forum: Our first meet

By *obertandDenise OP Couple
34 weeks ago

LONDON

Good morning

It looks like we are going to have our first meet with another cpl.

Both of us are nervous to say the least.

The other cpl are more experinced, any tips or advise on how to make this a really enjoyable exp for my partner and myself

Thanks x

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By *hatsWhatCoupleCouple
34 weeks ago

Northampton

Be a little nervous, it’s a good sign

Don’t overthink it. Assuming you have met people before and had sex before.

Agree your boundaries beforehand and don’t change them

No means no at anytime, even if you originally said yes

Assuming the other couple know you are inexperienced, don’t worry

Debrief afterwards and then debrief again

Have fun

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By *herryEatersCouple
34 weeks ago

East Cheshire

ALWAYS state the first meet is a 'social' with no promise of play that day. Real life can be somewhat different to the image others profiles create !. Be ready for a no-show too, relax and enjoy the night out anyway... If they do show suggest sitting with opposite partners to break the ice, test chemistry and allows for wandering hands and sneaky kisses

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By *rpeggioCouple
34 weeks ago

Baughurst

All of the above. If it's just a social, enjoy learning about their experiences and don't be shy to share what is what you are looking for, what turns you on.

If it is a play meet, agree beforehand any boundaries, among you and with them. Let the experienced couple suggest the tempo (when to spice things up and move to next level). Remain together in the same room if it's the first time you play with another couple so each of you can pay attention to your loved partner for signs of stress. Don't be afraid to pause at any time and have a private chat or even stop. No one knows what you will feel the first time (jealousy, excitement, relief, etc) so just pay attention to your loving one, ask if they are enjoying it. Wishing you a good time

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By *ames250122Man
34 weeks ago

Worcester

"Good morning

It looks like we are going to have our first meet with another cpl.

Both of us are nervous to say the least.

The other cpl are more experinced, any tips or advise on how to make this a really enjoyable exp for my partner and myself

Thanks x

Try not to let the nerves turn into pent up tension as the last thing you want is to start being short with each other and end up having a blazing row just before meeting them. Don’t get sauced either as drink may help with the nerves but turning up d*unk will ruin things.

Sounds silly to mention but everyone reacts to alcohol differently and even though someone doesn’t really drink or they have a low tolerance to alcohol you’d be surprised just how many decide to have a drink before a meet due to nerves and it effects them more then intended. Most importantly, just be yourselves because that is what they liked about you in the first and why they want meet, so just be you and comfortable in your own skin. Likewise, just be who you said you are to them when you go to meet. If you’re actually a smoker but you’ve not mentioned it on your profile and they say on theirs they won’t meet smokers, then tell them before meeting. In those situation’s you can just say you was nervous about saying. Obviously you respect their feelings and wanted to be honest with them. Going with the smoking example you can also say you won’t smoke before or during your meet, like wise you can say the same about vaping if that’s also an issue for them and then stick to that promise. Least then you’ve been upfront and done your best to meet and respect their wishes as well as giving them opportunity they deserve to have to decide for themselves if it’s still ok to meet. I know that might not sound great advice but believe me it is going to far better for you by addressing anything about who your are that’s not true before a meet then when you get there or during a meet and things suddenly turn awkward. I know those pointers might seem a bit odd to mention first as there’s more important ones further down, however I genuinely know a lovely couple I’m friends with from here and they had all the above happen to them in one meet. They don’t smoke and state that on their profile and that they don’t want to meet smoker. They arranged a meet with a couple they chatted with. The other couple decided to drive to them for the first time they all meet but had a big row on the drive down to them as they where running very late and nervous amongst other things. So they were also partly late as they had decided to stop of on the way down to get drinks as it turned out the wife was overwhelmed and just going along with things to make her husband happy more then anything else. So naturally she was a bag of nerves from being put in a position no one should be put in and got the drink to help to combat her nerves. However she wasn’t a drinker so by the time they turned up three hours late, both where stressed and not really talking to each other, she was pretty sauced and the first thing the guy asked was if he could outside and stand in the back garden which puzzled them as why he wanted to stand in the back garden until he then proceeded to light a cigarette once in the back garden lol. Obviously the meet was a big waste of time and nothing happened as it ruined everything.

Probably the most critically important thing you should do during a meet is maintain a good level of communication between you with where your both at and are ok with the situation. It’s a lot easier to forget to keep that communication going than people might think as your both are there to relax and get to know the other couple. You get involved in a conversation or looking at something they’re showing you (nothing rude, you naughty minded lot) and you miss your partner trying to subtly signal you to tell you something up, what ever that may be. You may be getting on well with one half of the couple your meeting but at the same time while your distracted having fun your other half, may after meeting and chatting with their other half, decides they want to go or not take things further despite trying to get your attention for support they are left in a horrible awkward situation until they are left with no other choice but to make a scene to get your attention, which most people don’t like being put in a position where they have to do that.

Lastly try to push the thought of sex or potentially hooking up to the back of your mind or completely out of your mind if possible so it’s no different to when you go to see your friends. Then just relax, chat and have a laugh together as a group as you get to know each. Removing any pressure so you all can just chill in each other company and things will progress naturally and happen organically so by the time you leave you come away enjoying a far better meet then you imagined x

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