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"Just be open about what people can expect. There are some couples who are happy to meet socially with a view to getting to know people rather than straight in to swapping but they are few and far between as we have discovered " __ Totally this. OP, be clear about what people can expect if you are not ready to follow up with play at a later date. Also because if you find them attractive but you are not ready to play yet, and they do not know that, they will feel that you are lying and do not find them attractive, or think that you are timewasters. So, being open is the best policy. That's the way you'll find other couples who don't mind to take things slowly and are happy with one or more no-expectations socials. You can guess who these couples may be, based on their verifications. For example, mostly having regular one to one socials but no indication of many playdates. Suggests they like socials and try to find matching partners, but they are cautious and take things slowly. Like you . | |||
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"We have met new couples socially but there are a lot of couple who, for one reason or other,come on to the site and never play. Our view is if you’ve not played within 6-12 months of joining the site then the chances of ever playing are small. We’d recommend getting your head together before engaging with lots of people. If you’ve met single guys then you have experienced group sex so you have to ask what’s holding you back with couples? " Playing with couples is a different dynamic to playing with single guys. W started out as soft swap with couples and no single guys, then we did full swap with a couple but didn’t have an excellent experience so we opened up to single guys and had an incredible experience. We’ve had one soft swap meet with a couple since then and all other play has been single guys. We find it easier, there’s no drama and one less person to worry about which sounds awful but it’s true. There’s also the matter of the attraction working all ways with two couples rather than simplified with a single guy. If one of the couple has insecurities there could also be concerns about introducing a couple. The two aren’t comparable for a lot of people. C x | |||
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"We have recently been discussing the idea of meeting couples fully in the future but would be happy with potential socials now. We appreciate most couples are beyond that stage so would people advise to wait until we are in a place where a meet would be highly possible or pursue the social side and try and build up to it. We only meet with single guys at present. " Make sure you’re clear on your profile about the fact you’re taking things slowly and open to socials but not currently ready to play with couples. You could look at going to group socials. For us personally, we don’t really do social meets (aside from meeting for a drink or dinner before we head for play given everyone is happy to do that) we have such limited time that we have to be selective about how we spend it. We’re happy to chat to people via group chats for a while but if too much time passes without meeting, it kinda feels like the fire has been put out. When we first joined here, we went to clubs so we could socialise with other couples and talk to like minded people but we were exhibitionists and not playing with anyone then (that didn’t last long!) so although we chatted to people, we knew there wouldn’t be any play happening with them and it was fine. As long as you’re clear from the start, I can guarantee you’ll find other people are in a similar boat and a lot of couples prefer to have a proper social meet before any play anyway. C x | |||
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