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What do I do?

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon

Curious to know if anyone has experienced this? My wife was the instigator of us swinging and convinced me we would enjoy it. The last few times we have met up with someone she’s her usual giddy self but once the action starts I can tell she’s not completely enjoying it. I always check she wants to stop but she never does and when I ask afterwards what up. She just says everything was fine. So I never push for another meet and she’s the one who wants us to arrange another?!? Any advise as to what to do?

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By *ellhungvweMan
50 weeks ago

Cheltenham

It would seem that she is enjoying it more than you think she is. The fact that she wants to go again would suggest she is making an active choice.

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Sounds like you don’t enjoy it not her

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon

I do enjoy watching her being super in to it. But sometimes she looks like she not 100pc willing and that’s difficult to see

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By *orny-DJMan
50 weeks ago

Leigh-on-Sea


"Sounds like you don’t enjoy it not her"

I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking this

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon

Does anyone else’s partner do this? I’m getting the impression I’m being paranoid

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By *cottish guy 555Man
50 weeks ago

London

Have you told her this?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
50 weeks ago

East Sussex

Until she says differently you are going to have to take what your wife says at face value.

If you personally have doubts about how she's feeling perhaps you should call a halt to meeting until you can resolve this

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
50 weeks ago

East Sussex


"Does anyone else’s partner do this? I’m getting the impression I’m being paranoid"

Do you think she's not telling you the truth?

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon

Yeah ive brought it up and she’s says it all fine. Maybe I should try and ignore it.

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon


"Does anyone else’s partner do this? I’m getting the impression I’m being paranoid

Do you think she's not telling you the truth?"

I hope not as honestly she is under no pressure from me to meet.

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By *ellinever70Woman
50 weeks ago

Ayrshire

How does she feel about you posting this on here?

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon


"How does she feel about you posting this on here?"

Errr I haven’t thought abt that

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
50 weeks ago

East Sussex


"Does anyone else’s partner do this? I’m getting the impression I’m being paranoid

Do you think she's not telling you the truth?

I hope not as honestly she is under no pressure from me to meet. "

I think if either partner has *any* doubts or reservations about anything that they should stop meeting, discuss it until the problem his resolved and only then get back to swinging.

You obviously have doubts.

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By *pl4FunDom OP   Couple
50 weeks ago

swindon

Yeah food for thought.

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By *untimes wantedMan
50 weeks ago

Huddersfield

Op have you thought about she maybe picking up on your doubts that she is enjoying it and its making her feel uncomfortable from maybe your body language or expression on your face etc.

If your a close couple she will pick up on how your feeling.

Also are you enjoying it or is it you having doubts about the lifestyle and hoping she is not enjoying it.

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By *ickD80Man
50 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

I get the impression that you’re looking for a reason to stop meeting other men so I assume you don’t enjoy it. Your wife had to convince you to try it, you look for reasons to stop whilst you’re doing it, you never suggest arranging another meet….all signs that you’re really not into it.

Are you doing it just to please your wife because you know she wants to do it? Do you feel pressured to do it? If it was up to you would you carry on doing it or stop? If you don’t enjoy it and don’t want to do it then you should tell your wife.

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
50 weeks ago

Stockport

A no is a no

Any funny feelings is a no

Any doubt is a no

In fact if its not a 100% yes with bells on

Then it's a no

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago


"A no is a no

Any funny feelings is a no

Any doubt is a no

In fact if its not a 100% yes with bells on

Then it's a no"

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By *adgerMan
50 weeks ago

york


"A no is a no

Any funny feelings is a no

Any doubt is a no

In fact if its not a 100% yes with bells on

Then it's a no"

Totally agree

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By *ebaucherous_duoCouple
50 weeks ago

Bristol/ Daventry

[Removed by poster at 12/01/24 08:08:51]

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By *ebaucherous_duoCouple
50 weeks ago

Bristol/ Daventry

It sounds like the OP is projecting and looking at the profile description I suspect that the meets are not living up to his expectations rather than hers. If she wants to go again and asks for it, then that’s a sign of a good thing. Perhaps get her to set up a profile, do the fabmin, organise the meets. Given that you would like a cuck arrangement, the FLR approach may suit you better and result in meets that fulfil both your wishes and ensures absolute consent.

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By * and BCouple
50 weeks ago

Durham


"How does she feel about you posting this on here?

Errr I haven’t thought abt that"

Start with communication between the two of you, secondly communication then communication.

Maybe she is holding back with the emotion as she might think you may get jealous if she shows to much enthusiasm towards her play mate.

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By *reenleavesCouple
50 weeks ago

North Wales

Sometimes it's all about the build up, rather than the actual meet. It could be she gets off more on the pre-meet fantasies and excitement than the actual sex. And going through with the meet is the "price" she has to pay to get that mental kick before hand?

Reality very rarely lives up to the fantasy so her not appearing to be enjoying herself could just be that it's not matching her expectations? Like, the actual meet was OK, just not the fireworks she'd imagined.

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By *rpeggioCouple
50 weeks ago

Baughurst


"Sometimes it's all about the build up, rather than the actual meet. It could be she gets off more on the pre-meet fantasies and excitement than the actual sex. And going through with the meet is the "price" she has to pay to get that mental kick before hand?

Reality very rarely lives up to the fantasy so her not appearing to be enjoying herself could just be that it's not matching her expectations? Like, the actual meet was OK, just not the fireworks she'd imagined. "

__

I see no issue with consent from either you or her in this arrangement.

She suggested swinging and you agreed, and you say she asks for more meets. During the meetings, she is not into it because she can't help but worrying if you are ok with it, and so she can't relax and enjoy herself.

This is reinforced by you constantly asking her if she's ok, or if she wants to stop play. Lena or I would not be able to get into it if we were asking each other every 5 minutes "are you ok?", "are you ok?".

She is a grown up and she is capable to give or deny consent and say stop whenever she wants, she suggested swinging so does not sound like the person who is not ok but afraid to say so during a meet. Perhaps if you let go and enjoy play, rather than constantly second guessing her, she might be able to relax and enjoy it fully.

You are a grown up too and also capable to give or deny consent in regards to your involvement, so if you really don't want to meet, or play, you can say so at any time.

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By *esYesOMGYes!Man
50 weeks ago

M20

Ask her maybe?

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By *cnugatugMan
50 weeks ago

Chatham

Talk to her about it dude talking is a major part of being a swinging couple if ones not into it then maybe take a break rekindle your own spark and then possibly jump back in when you both feel the interest

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By *ete_wifeCouple
50 weeks ago

suffield

maybe she should do this in another room without you?

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