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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it" Having rules is so so important! please don't think otherwise! My advice is let them meet the male one on one for a chat at a location away from the hotel and coordinate that way, its a good starting test and creates a confidence requirement! | |||
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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it and Essex is full of Asians so no-one really cares, not sharing face pics before meeting is a huge red flag. Why no just meet in the hotel bar and chat and discuss any boundaries at the time once everyone is comfortable?" No such thing as "so many rules" They can have 100 rules if they wish it's upto them, and it's only between them and the people who chose to meet them! | |||
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"Meet them in the bar, and definitely meet them as a couple. The ideal outcome is surely that the guy only gets as far as the room if it’s all systems go, no? Otherwise it may be risky for you two, gives the impression that Mrs isn’t as engaged in the whole thing as you are, and makes it two interviews that he’s got to pass instead of one. " Indeed and OP only has to pass one interview as well. Presumably the man in question may meet and decide not for me especially as no face pics before. We don’t just massage and wank over anyone | |||
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"Meet them in the bar, and definitely meet them as a couple. The ideal outcome is surely that the guy only gets as far as the room if it’s all systems go, no? Otherwise it may be risky for you two, gives the impression that Mrs isn’t as engaged in the whole thing as you are, and makes it two interviews that he’s got to pass instead of one. Indeed and OP only has to pass one interview as well. Presumably the man in question may meet and decide not for me especially as no face pics before. We don’t just massage and wank over anyone " An excellent point, well made! | |||
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"We are now on our mini-break in Essex. I've set up ads for Sunday and Monday and already get several dozen contacts. We dont want to meet the guy in our hotel bar as we do stick ot as atm only asian people there and nor do we feel we would feel comfy talking to the guy/s where possibly others could hear. my plan is having arrange a meet just past the hotel, if they guy is what he claimed, invite him back to the bedroom to meet mrs and then have a 5 min chat. We'd make clear and have as per our ad/profile that we may not click If we click then its a nude massage for the wife, she wears very small pair of knickers and guy gives her all-over massage and then can wank afterwards but nothing more. We were just looking for younger, well hung for first meet but are now considering older guy/s not possibly well hung Have you met anyone at your hotel and was new, relatively new to this and what would your tips be? Should I remove the gallery pic of Mrs, pussy pic and only put this up once we've had a meet/s and more confident, ie most likely more than massage? feel free to pm thanks again" Nobody is going to want to even speak to you without you showing face pics tbh...would you be happy arranging meets with someone that has refused to share pics with you? | |||
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"We are now on our mini-break in Essex. I've set up ads for Sunday and Monday and already get several dozen contacts. We dont want to meet the guy in our hotel bar as we do stick ot as atm only asian people there and nor do we feel we would feel comfy talking to the guy/s where possibly others could hear. my plan is having arrange a meet just past the hotel, if they guy is what he claimed, invite him back to the bedroom to meet mrs and then have a 5 min chat. We'd make clear and have as per our ad/profile that we may not click If we click then its a nude massage for the wife, she wears very small pair of knickers and guy gives her all-over massage and then can wank afterwards but nothing more. We were just looking for younger, well hung for first meet but are now considering older guy/s not possibly well hung Have you met anyone at your hotel and was new, relatively new to this and what would your tips be? Should I remove the gallery pic of Mrs, pussy pic and only put this up once we've had a meet/s and more confident, ie most likely more than massage? feel free to pm thanks again Nobody is going to want to even speak to you without you showing face pics tbh...would you be happy arranging meets with someone that has refused to share pics with you?" You don't know Fab very well. Plenty of men will meet without seeing face pics. They may not meet because of all the other issues and may attract the wrong but face pics per se not a barrier. | |||
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"Most people are oblivious to what others are doing, meet them in the bar. Stop treating the lifestyle like a dirty little secret!!" It is a dirty secret to some people. Me included. So totally understand the want for discretion. But on holiday, away from your home town meeting in a bar shouldn’t be an issue IMO. | |||
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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it and Essex is full of Asians so no-one really cares, not sharing face pics before meeting is a huge red flag. Why no just meet in the hotel bar and chat and discuss any boundaries at the time once everyone is comfortable?" Essex is full of Asians?!!!!! | |||
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"I believe we each have the right to stipulte what works for us, whatever that is. If people dont like it then just trot on. If I were available I would certainly be interested not all meets have to be the same." Yes but would you be prepared to drive 2 and a half hours for an interview with Mr? Of course up to all what they want but it does reduce the field of available candidates rather drastically. | |||
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"There's good advice and considerations on here, from some of the single guys. Ignore the issue regarding face pictures being a red flag. We've been on this site, and others like it for about a decade. We've never shared our face pictures. Our first ever meet was with a younger single guy at a hotel. We didn't realise at the time, but we were very fortunate - because we now know, many single guys simply don't turn up! Even friends who DO share face pictures complain about this! Using the term boundaries, is probably better than rules. Keep your boundaries as you see fit, because there are two possibly outcomes of regret a) you keep your boundaries and later wish you had been more flexible, or b) you loosen your boundaries and later wish you hadn't. Guess which outcome is going to be the most difficult to deal with. Of the good advice you've been given here, I/we would agree that you should consider how nervous the single guy will be. So don't over complicate the meet. Like another person has mentioned above, just meet in the bar and make it look like a normal meet from day to day life. Good luck, and have fun. " Thank you and the others with good advice | |||
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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it and Essex is full of Asians so no-one really cares, not sharing face pics before meeting is a huge red flag. Why no just meet in the hotel bar and chat and discuss any boundaries at the time once everyone is comfortable? Essex is full of Asians?!!!!!" lol yes that did make me laugh but I think it was just a clumsy way of saying Asians are not uncommon so wouldn't stand out | |||
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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it and Essex is full of Asians so no-one really cares, not sharing face pics before meeting is a huge red flag. Why no just meet in the hotel bar and chat and discuss any boundaries at the time once everyone is comfortable? Essex is full of Asians?!!!!! lol yes that did make me laugh but I think it was just a clumsy way of saying Asians are not uncommon so wouldn't stand out" Also this brings me back to a question I asked about where in Essex as it's huge despite the TOWIE focus on Brentwood and Chigwell and other bits near London. | |||
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"We are now on our mini-break in Essex. I've set up ads for Sunday and Monday and already get several dozen contacts. We dont want to meet the guy in our hotel bar as we do stick ot as atm only asian people there and nor do we feel we would feel comfy talking to the guy/s where possibly others could hear. my plan is having arrange a meet just past the hotel, if they guy is what he claimed, invite him back to the bedroom to meet mrs and then have a 5 min chat. We'd make clear and have as per our ad/profile that we may not click If we click then its a nude massage for the wife, she wears very small pair of knickers and guy gives her all-over massage and then can wank afterwards but nothing more. We were just looking for younger, well hung for first meet but are now considering older guy/s not possibly well hung Have you met anyone at your hotel and was new, relatively new to this and what would your tips be? Should I remove the gallery pic of Mrs, pussy pic and only put this up once we've had a meet/s and more confident, ie most likely more than massage? feel free to pm thanks again" My first hotel meet her partner met me at the coffee shop next to the hotel and I spoke to him for a while before he took me up to the room and left us to it. Filmed everything on the go pro | |||
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"I couldn't speak to whether this would be an appealing offer to other guys but it certainly wouldn't be for me. I would essentially feel used. But in fairness if I had a kink for jerking myself off over a woman while her husband watched it would be totally different. I do think you can have as many rules and boundaries as you like and as long a the guy knows what he's getting into all is fair." Agreed | |||
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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it and Essex is full of Asians so no-one really cares, not sharing face pics before meeting is a huge red flag. Why no just meet in the hotel bar and chat and discuss any boundaries at the time once everyone is comfortable?" Agree .. Meets cloaked in restrictions because you feel anxious isn't really going to work is it .. Just met at the hotel bar. Move to a corner of three areas to a table and talk quietly, who cares if people hear anyway. People meet in a hotel bar and go up to the room for a shag, shock horror !! | |||
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"We are now on our mini-break in Essex. I've set up ads for Sunday and Monday and already get several dozen contacts. We dont want to meet the guy in our hotel bar as we do stick ot as atm only asian people there and nor do we feel we would feel comfy talking to the guy/s where possibly others could hear. my plan is having arrange a meet just past the hotel, if they guy is what he claimed, invite him back to the bedroom to meet mrs and then have a 5 min chat. We'd make clear and have as per our ad/profile that we may not click If we click then its a nude massage for the wife, she wears very small pair of knickers and guy gives her all-over massage and then can wank afterwards but nothing more. We were just looking for younger, well hung for first meet but are now considering older guy/s not possibly well hung Have you met anyone at your hotel and was new, relatively new to this and what would your tips be? Should I remove the gallery pic of Mrs, pussy pic and only put this up once we've had a meet/s and more confident, ie most likely more than massage? feel free to pm thanks again Nobody is going to want to even speak to you without you showing face pics tbh...would you be happy arranging meets with someone that has refused to share pics with you?" The above. To all fabswingers, and some have stated it here already. There are MANY that will not just "SPEAK" to you but will meet you and that is a fact As long as one's ad/profile is clear, it is as others said the cnatactors choice if to contact or not. Most guys have their face pics on their profile and most couple don't and that is another fact. What we are seeking is clear and the fact we won't provide a face pic is clear and we get many, many contacts. Those that cotnact us are aware of this. After all we are not looking for a love-affair, lol Many thanks for the help as it was really useful. | |||
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"We are now on our mini-break in Essex. I've set up ads for Sunday and Monday and already get several dozen contacts. We dont want to meet the guy in our hotel bar as we do stick ot as atm only asian people there and nor do we feel we would feel comfy talking to the guy/s where possibly others could hear. my plan is having arrange a meet just past the hotel, if they guy is what he claimed, invite him back to the bedroom to meet mrs and then have a 5 min chat. We'd make clear and have as per our ad/profile that we may not click If we click then its a nude massage for the wife, she wears very small pair of knickers and guy gives her all-over massage and then can wank afterwards but nothing more. We were just looking for younger, well hung for first meet but are now considering older guy/s not possibly well hung Have you met anyone at your hotel and was new, relatively new to this and what would your tips be? Should I remove the gallery pic of Mrs, pussy pic and only put this up once we've had a meet/s and more confident, ie most likely more than massage? feel free to pm thanks again Nobody is going to want to even speak to you without you showing face pics tbh...would you be happy arranging meets with someone that has refused to share pics with you? The above. To all fabswingers, and some have stated it here already. There are MANY that will not just "SPEAK" to you but will meet you and that is a fact As long as one's ad/profile is clear, it is as others said the cnatactors choice if to contact or not. Most guys have their face pics on their profile and most couple don't and that is another fact. What we are seeking is clear and the fact we won't provide a face pic is clear and we get many, many contacts. Those that cotnact us are aware of this. After all we are not looking for a love-affair, lol Many thanks for the help as it was really useful. " | |||
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"Man you have so many rules, very offputting I would imagine. Sounds like you're over thinking it and Essex is full of Asians so no-one really cares, not sharing face pics before meeting is a huge red flag. Why no just meet in the hotel bar and chat and discuss any boundaries at the time once everyone is comfortable?" I don't see too many rules or red flags at all. It's their first meet and they both need to be comfortable and happy with it. They are not there as a public service, it is about real people and they can safeguard themselves how they see fit. I think that the idea of a laptop and appearance of a business meeting is a great one. Nobody will know and you can go at your own pace that way. You are in control and any men you meet need to follow your rules. | |||
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