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why is it i can’t find a regular meet

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail

looking for a regular female to attend clubs and socials with but finding it difficult

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Because there are about 200 of you for every one of them.

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By *aughtywifeandhimCouple
over a year ago

bedford

Why don’t you attend the club first , get chatting to the single females , even some of the wife’s, I know a few of them attend the club with guys they have met when there husbands can’t be there and vice versa

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple
over a year ago

Cumbria


"looking for a regular female to attend clubs and socials with but finding it difficult "

You and 200 other men for every female. Women can afford to be picky and you have to stand out to get their attention.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail

i do attend clubs

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"looking for a regular female to attend clubs and socials with but finding it difficult "

You have plenty of verifications from ladies you have met in clubs already, what about the networking aspect of the club scene?

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By *oulou22Woman
over a year ago

Sutton

If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

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By *lackMetalMan
over a year ago

Centre

Looks like the OP has been to clubs and met women based on his verifications.

The issue may be that he can’t close - convert from chats in the jacuzzi to sex. Is that the issue, OP?

Not sure if going with a female would change that.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems. "

It may be he’s actually looking for a girlfriend/fwb style friendship?

Based on my clubs experiences as a solo guy and as a couple, I would always recommend going in as a couple

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems. "

Couples entrance fee.

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

Couples entrance fee."

I did wonder

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"Looks like the OP has been to clubs and met women based on his verifications.

The issue may be that he can’t close - convert from chats in the jacuzzi to sex. Is that the issue, OP?

Not sure if going with a female would change that."

i’m disabled and sometimes i get it in my head that i’m not good enough(which i know is stupid) so just go into survival mode and clam up and hardly talk

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

Couples entrance fee."

nothing to do with entrance fee as i’m already a member as a single male

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

It may be he’s actually looking for a girlfriend/fwb style friendship?

Based on my clubs experiences as a solo guy and as a couple, I would always recommend going in as a couple "

exactly this

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

[Removed by poster at 21/08/23 21:49:19]

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Perhaps it's about you OP, including the people who you meet. Perhaps take a look at how/who You're meeting and the interactions you're having.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems. "

It does allow you to enter couples only rooms/events and can get you to meet people because not-meeting-single-males is a common barrier.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

It does allow you to enter couples only rooms/events and can get you to meet people because not-meeting-single-males is a common barrier."

exactly this

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville


"looking for a regular female to attend clubs and socials with but finding it difficult "

Maybe start by calling us women or ladies? 'Female' is a bit cringy.

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth


"looking for a regular female to attend clubs and socials with but finding it difficult

Maybe start by calling us women or ladies? 'Female' is a bit cringy."

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By *rbane PlayerMan
over a year ago

London


"looking for a regular female to attend clubs and socials with but finding it difficult "

While I believe you mean well, not sure the Forum is the place to make progress. There have been excellent suggestions above. The only extra point I would add is possibly joining a group of men who do gang bangs and attending events. You may get lucky and meet a lady who would like to go to a club with you

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By *bwstarzWoman
over a year ago

south cheshire

A lot of ladies that go clubs prefer to go as singles, I do and so do several other ladies that I know. There are only a couple guys I’ll team up with for a club visit and I know them very well but other than those I’ll be a single and have been for many a club night.

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By *emptress and GentCouple
over a year ago

South Coast / London

Agree with a lot of the above. The odds are not in your favour. We have met plenty of single guys and the number temptress would consider being a club buddy with is, by comparison, very very few.

Good luck, keep going and who knows, you may beat the odds!

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By *heekyDemandCouple
over a year ago

Leicester

Depends what you mean, you say regular so I assume you mean the same girl again and again.

Even if you do get invited to play in a club, they may play with someone else next time.

Don't take it personal, to stand out you need to be exceptional.

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By *lan157Man
over a year ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

Why don't you consider asking a non swinging woman friend to go with you OP on the understanding you are only going for hot tubs etc on that occasion. It brings someone new into the scene if it works out

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail

yes i mean the same girl again

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"Depends what you mean, you say regular so I assume you mean the same girl again and again.

Even if you do get invited to play in a club, they may play with someone else next time.

Don't take it personal, to stand out you need to be exceptional."

yes the same girl

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"Why don't you consider asking a non swinging woman friend to go with you OP on the understanding you are only going for hot tubs etc on that occasion. It brings someone new into the scene if it works out "

how would you explain it to a vanilla friend lol ??

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By *aughtyLittlePicsCouple
over a year ago

Belper


"Why don't you consider asking a non swinging woman friend to go with you OP on the understanding you are only going for hot tubs etc on that occasion. It brings someone new into the scene if it works out

how would you explain it to a vanilla friend lol ?? "

A friends husband did exactly this. His wife didn't want to go with him so she actually suggested he went with her best friend!!

Best friend was a lesbian and they basically just looked out for each other and enjoyed it very much as a social thing

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"Why don't you consider asking a non swinging woman friend to go with you OP on the understanding you are only going for hot tubs etc on that occasion. It brings someone new into the scene if it works out

how would you explain it to a vanilla friend lol ??

A friends husband did exactly this. His wife didn't want to go with him so she actually suggested he went with her best friend!!

Best friend was a lesbian and they basically just looked out for each other and enjoyed it very much as a social thing

"

all female friends are married and don’t know about me being in lifestyle

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By *eth_GeckoMan
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

To be honest you are better having or finding a relationship or fun outside all this mess in here.

You are looking for advice and help and getting the usual BS answers about going to clubs when already you have been.

So now woman don't like to be called females? Really?

What else can people possibly complain about in here....its basically Facebook for adults a majority of the time.

Also quite a few profiles in here are basically linked to onlyfans site as well if ya do ya homework.

This was supposed to be a fun site where ya meet nice males and FEMALES...its been anything but that so far.

I joined this site with good intentions to meet nice people and to have some fun....nothing like that so far..

Good luck though.

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By *ink vixenCouple
over a year ago

Medway

Single guys looking to attend couples only nights need a female wing person.

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By *ink vixenCouple
over a year ago

Medway


"To be honest you are better having or finding a relationship or fun outside all this mess in here.

You are looking for advice and help and getting the usual BS answers about going to clubs when already you have been.

So now woman don't like to be called females? Really?

What else can people possibly complain about in here....its basically Facebook for adults a majority of the time.

Also quite a few profiles in here are basically linked to onlyfans site as well if ya do ya homework.

This was supposed to be a fun site where ya meet nice males and FEMALES...its been anything but that so far.

I joined this site with good intentions to meet nice people and to have some fun....nothing like that so far..

Good luck though.

"

Are you not enjoying yourself then?

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

This sounds contradictory: you get more confident at swinging solo and pickier about what you want in a swinging partner. I have two gorgeous gentlemen I picked up in clubs - both introverts - and their most attractive quality for both of them was their attitude as single men.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"This sounds contradictory: you get more confident at swinging solo and pickier about what you want in a swinging partner. I have two gorgeous gentlemen I picked up in clubs - both introverts - and their most attractive quality for both of them was their attitude as single men. "

no in my expirience i spoke to more ppl when part of a couple friday summed it perfectly chatting to a couple about meeting at a club didn’t know what they looked like(i was going to the club anyway) so went to the club everyone i tried to chat to were in their own little clicks so left about midnight spoke to the couple next day asking we’re you there answer was yes we seen you but we’re already chatting with friends. my question is rather than being rude and ignorant how do i make conversation if everyone i wana chat to us already chatting to their friends

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots


"To be honest you are better having or finding a relationship or fun outside all this mess in here.

You are looking for advice and help and getting the usual BS answers about going to clubs when already you have been.

So now woman don't like to be called females? Really?

"

I have no issue with it...men and women...male and female...both everyday terms.

Flik

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This sounds contradictory: you get more confident at swinging solo and pickier about what you want in a swinging partner. I have two gorgeous gentlemen I picked up in clubs - both introverts - and their most attractive quality for both of them was their attitude as single men.

no in my expirience i spoke to more ppl when part of a couple friday summed it perfectly chatting to a couple about meeting at a club didn’t know what they looked like(i was going to the club anyway) so went to the club everyone i tried to chat to were in their own little clicks so left about midnight spoke to the couple next day asking we’re you there answer was yes we seen you but we’re already chatting with friends. my question is rather than being rude and ignorant how do i make conversation if everyone i wana chat to us already chatting to their friends "

Thats a bit mean?! They couldnt spare you 5 mins or acknowledge you? I get what OP means about being with someone else - least you have someone to talk to, where its not striking up a convo from scratch. Doesnt have to be a play mate. Saying that though i prefer to attend clubs alone as it give me flexibility to come and go as i please.

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth


"To be honest you are better having or finding a relationship or fun outside all this mess in here.

You are looking for advice and help and getting the usual BS answers about going to clubs when already you have been.

So now woman don't like to be called females? Really?

What else can people possibly complain about in here....its basically Facebook for adults a majority of the time.

Also quite a few profiles in here are basically linked to onlyfans site as well if ya do ya homework.

This was supposed to be a fun site where ya meet nice males and FEMALES...its been anything but that so far.

I joined this site with good intentions to meet nice people and to have some fun....nothing like that so far..

Good luck though.

"

Would you like some cheese with your whine?

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

It may be he’s actually looking for a girlfriend/fwb style friendship?

Based on my clubs experiences as a solo guy and as a couple, I would always recommend going in as a couple "

I have a couples profile as well with a lady, we have fun but I don't think couples only nights are as good fun as when singles are allowed in. It's a nicer vibe, certainly in chams

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.


"This sounds contradictory: you get more confident at swinging solo and pickier about what you want in a swinging partner. I have two gorgeous gentlemen I picked up in clubs - both introverts - and their most attractive quality for both of them was their attitude as single men.

no in my expirience i spoke to more ppl when part of a couple friday summed it perfectly chatting to a couple about meeting at a club didn’t know what they looked like(i was going to the club anyway) so went to the club everyone i tried to chat to were in their own little clicks so left about midnight spoke to the couple next day asking we’re you there answer was yes we seen you but we’re already chatting with friends. my question is rather than being rude and ignorant how do i make conversation if everyone i wana chat to us already chatting to their friends "

Clubs can be cliquey even cpls can feel that way as we been ignored in our local club many times. Know how you feel.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"This sounds contradictory: you get more confident at swinging solo and pickier about what you want in a swinging partner. I have two gorgeous gentlemen I picked up in clubs - both introverts - and their most attractive quality for both of them was their attitude as single men.

no in my expirience i spoke to more ppl when part of a couple friday summed it perfectly chatting to a couple about meeting at a club didn’t know what they looked like(i was going to the club anyway) so went to the club everyone i tried to chat to were in their own little clicks so left about midnight spoke to the couple next day asking we’re you there answer was yes we seen you but we’re already chatting with friends. my question is rather than being rude and ignorant how do i make conversation if everyone i wana chat to us already chatting to their friends

Thats a bit mean?! They couldnt spare you 5 mins or acknowledge you? I get what OP means about being with someone else - least you have someone to talk to, where its not striking up a convo from scratch. Doesnt have to be a play mate. Saying that though i prefer to attend clubs alone as it give me flexibility to come and go as i please. "

yeah apparently not they couldn’t even be bothered to send face pics do we’d knew what each other looked like i sent them mine

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

I can only say what worked for me. I'm shy and insecure, and going to a club on my own was the best thing I've ever done.

I went as regularly as I could, stayed as positive as I could, put myself in the places where open conversations were happening, and made myself join in.

As it happened, I met the person who is now my partner on my second night in. We didn't know it then, of course, and didn't play together for over a month.

In the time I was going and not playing, I got to know the regulars and the staff, and they got to know me. That makes a difference. Get yourself a reputation as a decent person and good company, and you will have a good club experience.

As a shy and insecure type, I find that if I go with someone, it's too easy to let them do all the socialling, and slide into the background. If you're wanting to make connections for yourself, I think you're better off going on your own.

It's not easy. It takes work and persistence. It is perhaps not for those who give up at the first difficulty. But I found it worth the effort. I've made some great friends, and it was a massive boost to my confidence.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"I can only say what worked for me. I'm shy and insecure, and going to a club on my own was the best thing I've ever done.

I went as regularly as I could, stayed as positive as I could, put myself in the places where open conversations were happening, and made myself join in.

As it happened, I met the person who is now my partner on my second night in. We didn't know it then, of course, and didn't play together for over a month.

In the time I was going and not playing, I got to know the regulars and the staff, and they got to know me. That makes a difference. Get yourself a reputation as a decent person and good company, and you will have a good club experience.

As a shy and insecure type, I find that if I go with someone, it's too easy to let them do all the socialling, and slide into the background. If you're wanting to make connections for yourself, I think you're better off going on your own.

It's not easy. It takes work and persistence. It is perhaps not for those who give up at the first difficulty. But I found it worth the effort. I've made some great friends, and it was a massive boost to my confidence."

yeah i’ve been loads but often i get inside my own head i just need to open my mouth and speak

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne


"yeah i’ve been loads but often i get inside my own head i just need to open my mouth and speak "

My strategy for that is to promise myself before I go that I will talk with at least one person. Somehow that promise makes me make the effort.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"yeah i’ve been loads but often i get inside my own head i just need to open my mouth and speak

My strategy for that is to promise myself before I go that I will talk with at least one person. Somehow that promise makes me make the effort."

yeah but also don’t wana be rude and interrupt couples/singles already chatting xx

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne


"yeah but also don’t wana be rude and interrupt couples/singles already chatting xx"

That's why you find the places with open conversations. The smoking area is traditionally good for this - it's a space that people drift in and out of, so it tends not to be private conversation. The hot tub can be good too. Get to know your club, try different approaches, learn. Above all, don't be a dick and you'll be miles ahead of many.

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By *estinysswingersCouple
over a year ago

Worsley

Numbers.

You’re a man in a sea of other men.

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"yeah but also don’t wana be rude and interrupt couples/singles already chatting xx

That's why you find the places with open conversations. The smoking area is traditionally good for this - it's a space that people drift in and out of, so it tends not to be private conversation. The hot tub can be good too. Get to know your club, try different approaches, learn. Above all, don't be a dick and you'll be miles ahead of many."

i’ll try on my next visit

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail

off to chams friday got room booked hopefully a good night where i eventually open my mouth and talk

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham


"off to chams friday got room booked hopefully a good night where i eventually open my mouth and talk "

You have absolutely got this. Have an amazing time and enjoy yourself.

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By *oll_Face_xxWoman
over a year ago

Dollywood

Had quick scroll on your verifications and saw 3 different ones saying

enjoyed their play time with you and look forward to doing it again...

Have you continued to build on those connections ?

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"off to chams friday got room booked hopefully a good night where i eventually open my mouth and talk

You have absolutely got this. Have an amazing time and enjoy yourself. "

everytime i want to chat to ppl they’re already in company so i don’t want to interrupt them

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"yeah but also don’t wana be rude and interrupt couples/singles already chatting xx

That's why you find the places with open conversations. The smoking area is traditionally good for this - it's a space that people drift in and out of, so it tends not to be private conversation. The hot tub can be good too. Get to know your club, try different approaches, learn. Above all, don't be a dick and you'll be miles ahead of many."

again ppl are in in their clicks snd already chatting

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By *te55444Man
over a year ago

Swansea

I sometimes wonder am I ever going to suck a cock again. It's so hard to find a straight bloke that just wants their cock sucked!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

It may be he’s actually looking for a girlfriend/fwb style friendship?

Based on my clubs experiences as a solo guy and as a couple, I would always recommend going in as a couple "

If you are looking for a FWB / GF say so. Be honest on your profile. And then put the effort in that a woman would expect. Lots of guys seem to only want a FWB without wanting to really be friends!

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By *agicmarc OP   Man
over a year ago

tonyrefail


"If you already go to clubs by yourself, what are you hoping for by going with someone. Surely if you're flying solo you can do whatever you want. I don't think going with someone automatically opens the door to more playing, it may just cause you more problems.

It may be he’s actually looking for a girlfriend/fwb style friendship?

Based on my clubs experiences as a solo guy and as a couple, I would always recommend going in as a couple

If you are looking for a FWB / GF say so. Be honest on your profile. And then put the effort in that a woman would expect. Lots of guys seem to only want a FWB without wanting to really be friends! "

sure it says on my profile that i’m looking fake fwb/gf to accompany me to clubs

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