FabSwingers.com forum: No face pic?

By *hreesomeHunters OP Couple (MM)
over a year ago

Colchester

Chatting to a couple about a potential MMF but despite being very chatty and the female of the couple sending some body pics etc, neither of them seem very keen on showing their face to me. Something doesn’t feel quite right about it all. Any advice?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hreesomeHunters OP Couple (MM)
over a year ago

Colchester

They have seen pictures of me, I’ve been respectful, open and honest. I’ve chatted to both of them about boundaries and desires individually on Skype messenger but something doesn’t seem quite right.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agicmarcMan
over a year ago

tonyrefail

that’s what gets me with some couples they ask you to send a face pic but aren’t willing to send face pics of them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would it be worth suggesting a short video call?

Or maybe a social meet?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you asked them outright? If so what reason have they given you for not sending one?

If it’s making you uneasy then go with your gut feeling.

I know some people won’t send face pics but you’ve got to know if there’s an attraction there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Check images via Google search engine

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hreesomeHunters OP Couple (MM)
over a year ago

Colchester

"Have you asked them outright? If so what reason have they given you for not sending one?

If it’s making you uneasy then go with your gut feeling.

I know some people won’t send face pics but you’ve got to know if there’s an attraction there."

This is my point, need to have some physical attraction. Been chatting to them for about 4/5 days now and every time I ask for a face pic they shun it off or say, we’re new to this, we don’t want to share just yet. I’m respecting that and not being pushy but it’s getting a bit long in the tooth now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

They're probably just testing the water

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hreesomeHunters OP Couple (MM)
over a year ago

Colchester

Hmmmmm, older guy, younger girl, dating a year and she’s very “inexperienced” by the sounds of it. Maybe I’m just worrying over nothing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always happy to send a face pic at this end

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agicmarcMan
over a year ago

tonyrefail

i been chatting to a couple tonight i know the female according to her wouldn’t give me a name or face pic then bang blocked me x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If you would like to see their faces and they don't want to show them you're at an impasse. Neither of you is wrong but you're probably not compatible.

We never show our face until a meet is agreed but respect that some people like to see faces before that.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agicmarcMan
over a year ago

tonyrefail

"If you would like to see their faces and they don't want to show them you're at an impasse. Neither of you is wrong but you're probably not compatible.

We never show our face until a meet is agreed but respect that some people like to see faces before that. "

but you don’t know if your attracted to the other if you can’t see a face pic?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If something doesn’t feel right trust your gut x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 03/07/23 00:24:05]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"If you would like to see their faces and they don't want to show them you're at an impasse. Neither of you is wrong but you're probably not compatible.

We never show our face until a meet is agreed but respect that some people like to see faces before that.

but you don’t know if your attracted to the other if you can’t see a face pic? "

True but we only meet socially first anyway because I don't know if I'm attracted to someone until I meet them in person.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *amieLDN22Man
over a year ago

London

If you don't show face, I dont show face. Simpels. Too many guys send out of desperation. This cost me a lot of meets but fuck it. Not sending.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *siaessex2Couple
over a year ago

essex

We been on here over 10years never sent a face pic.but always have a social first to see how we all get on.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"If you don't show face, I dont show face. Simpels. Too many guys send out of desperation. This cost me a lot of meets but fuck it. Not sending.

That's fair I think.

Quite a few people never ask us for face pictures but always recognise us when we meet.

It must be the hats with 'swingers ' written on them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

Go with your gut instinct. They can attach a pic to a message on Fab and once it’s been viewed it’s deleted.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We do not ask for face pics and do not send them. That is what a social meet is for. The adage you can't judge a book by its cover absolutely applies for us. People, their personalities, and -most importantly- how we interact with them is never conveyed by a pic. If people won't even meet for a coffee without seeing our faces we know they are not the people for us.

Just use your gut and you can't go wrong with a social meet first. It is not a waste of time, it can open a lot more doors if you are proactive and flexible.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *alleyDaveMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

"We do not ask for face pics and do not send them. That is what a social meet is for. The adage you can't judge a book by its cover absolutely applies for us. People, their personalities, and -most importantly- how we interact with them is never conveyed by a pic. If people won't even meet for a coffee without seeing our faces we know they are not the people for us.

Just use your gut and you can't go wrong with a social meet first. It is not a waste of time, it can open a lot more doors if you are proactive and flexible."

I admire and applaud your way of doing things. It's a breath of fresh air.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

Just use your gut and you can't go wrong with a social meet first. It is not a waste of time, it can open a lot more doors if you are proactive and flexible.

I admire and applaud your way of doing things. It's a breath of fresh air. "

Too brave. Face needed. When you get 100s of offers how do you distinguish which one if you're Gona play russian roulette with?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ackandtheunicornCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

It's probably a guy pretending to be a couple for wank material. We get loads and you can spot them a mile away.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

If it doesn't feel right it probably isn't, everyone has different rules in face pics.

For me personally I want to see them fairly quickly, my time is precious and I'm not having endless chat with someone I'm not attracted too, that's a waste of time for everyone, I'd definitely not be having a social if I'd not seen their face.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is happening often lately. So many fake profiles popping up that are so clearly fake. I’ve noticed the amount of “couples” profiles as well with no photos but asking men to go and meet the male partner as it’s a turn on for them. I mean can’t people even put effort into being fake these days?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

I am not comfortable sending my face pic to someone I am not sure yet I'd be happy to meet. I need a bit of a chat first to establish if there is a connection as it's my brain that needs to be interested first, not my eyes. Once I'm ready, I'm happy to send my face pic.

At the moment I'm only meeting any new people in clubs, by chance, so the need for the face pic is not there.

Also, I would not give a stranger my number or agree to a video call. I do have other means of communicating but leaving those until after the first meet as I see no need to take the conversation away from here.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

I'd go with my gut.. if something feels off then it usually is.

I could never meet someone without seeing a face pic first and see if there's an initial attraction there,we would be wasting time on a social meet if there's no initiall attraction to begin with.

Good luck OP .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *otbeefandonionsCouple
over a year ago

Bathgate

Yeah I wouldn't be happy with this. I don't have a lot if available time to spend on meets and I need at least some facial attraction

Like someone else said though you are at an impasse.

Might be worth just moving on if it's a deal breaker for you , as it is for us

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

"If you would like to see their faces and they don't want to show them you're at an impasse. Neither of you is wrong but you're probably not compatible.

We never show our face until a meet is agreed but respect that some people like to see faces before that.

but you don’t know if your attracted to the other if you can’t see a face pic? "

Maybe I approach fab differently to others but not every conversation needs to involve attraction.

I'll quite happily meet someone for a coffee even if I know beforehand we won't be getting naked at a later stage.

I don't swap facepics and have never once asked for one.

The only time it has ever happened has been after the meet is already agreed and we need to be able to recognise each other in the coffee shop.

I don't read anything into people not sharing facepics because they are right to be cautious with the level of info passed between chatgroups etc.

There are many other red flags long before the issue of facepics is discussed.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they aren't fab verified then I suspect it's a single guy, with pics taken from a site or someone else's profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

They're probably legit. I get if they don't feel safe to show their face at this stage that's their perogative. However it's totally your perogative to see their face before engaging any futher. After all trust goes both ways. If at this stage you feel you need to see their face and they won't maybe best to drop this couple. No one is wrong just different ways of working this.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

"If they aren't fab verified then I suspect it's a single guy, with pics taken from a site or someone else's profile "

I was gonna ask if they were verified

I'd go with your gut op and you won't go far wrong.

Some are genuinely cautious ,but some have other reasons they can't/won't send a face pic back .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Too brave. Face needed. When you get 100s of offers how do you distinguish which one if you're Gona play russian roulette with? "

Nothing brave about it, no one ever wants pics of Mr only Miss. We meet at very public locations for socials in very unsexy and open environments like a wetherspoons, or fast food place. When someone knows what you look like their body language is already "familiar" because they have made lots assumptions about you.

For us the pros are:

Their conversation/communication skills are good.

They are not pic collectors/window shopping.

They are not jacking off to Miss' face.

They are not trying to reverse image search us for other social media.

We get to share that first moment of body language which tells both us and them a heap of information.

Mr gets to see them picking their jaw from the floor in person.

Cons:

We risk no play on further meets -no play can happen even knowing the face first too- but still a great social (we already know they have conversation we enjoyed).

We risk being ghosted but they still do not have copies of Miss' face in their collection, and we still have a perfectly good time in each others company and maybe even flirt with the staff

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *winging Sally SeanCouple
over a year ago

Warks / Northants Border

Just use your gut and you can't go wrong with a social meet first. It is not a waste of time, it can open a lot more doors if you are proactive and flexible."

Absolutely spot on!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never sent a pic on here or on kik. Never will and that includes everyone I've met. Nothing will make me change my mind. If people don't want to send pics then move onto people who do. Stop trying to change people. You have your rules, respect theirs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *otbeefandonionsCouple
over a year ago

Bathgate

"I've never sent a pic on here or on kik. Never will and that includes everyone I've met. Nothing will make me change my mind. If people don't want to send pics then move onto people who do. Stop trying to change people. You have your rules, respect theirs "

I take it that when you arrange to meet someone then that you just give a description of yourself or hope that they've sent a pic to you?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I take it that when you arrange to meet someone then that you just give a description of yourself or hope that they've sent a pic to you? "

If meeting in a car park I'll ask what car they drive. If in Costa for example what they are wearing/where they are sitting. If it's in a place I'll ask the address. I'll give the same information. Common sense really

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Experience has told me that people reluctant to give face pics are usually wasting both of our time.

If they're too shy/nervous/whatever to give you a face pic, what's the chance of them actually showing up for a meet?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago

shropshire

"Chatting to a couple about a potential MMF but despite being very chatty and the female of the couple sending some body pics etc, neither of them seem very keen on showing their face to me. Something doesn’t feel quite right about it all. Any advice?"

Ask them out right ,gut feeling are usually right .don't let it get to you.some talk the talk or you're face pic wasn't for them ....nowt so strange as folk! X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take it that when you arrange to meet someone then that you just give a description of yourself or hope that they've sent a pic to you? "

It's amazingly simple to meet people without sharing face or even any pics. Meeting other people has been happening long long long before the camera phones.

You agree to a time and place, describe what you're wearing, whoever gets there first finds a spot to sit and messages the other where to find them.

The pushback we usually get is "That is not safe". Our reply "Yes it is, it is a public place with lots of other people. If we all decided it's not a match we haven't made things awkward or encroached on anyone's personal space.". Then leave it alone an wish them well on their journey.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ootprints1629Couple
over a year ago

somewhere in moray

"They have seen pictures of me, I’ve been respectful, open and honest. I’ve chatted to both of them about boundaries and desires individually on Skype messenger but something doesn’t seem quite right."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ony 529Man
over a year ago

coventry

We have had this alot on here, especially couples. Everytime you approach the subject they chamge it very quickly or just completely ignore the fact you have asked countless times or hinted toward it...its very frustrating.. we have learned to just go with our instinct and block...trust your gut feeling! "
. Absolutely right go with your first good feeling for me. The hasta be an attraction there so if you feel comfortable, you do share if you don’t don’t share

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imisugarWoman
over a year ago

Rugby

We have had this alot on here, especially couples. Everytime you approach the subject they chamge it very quickly or just completely ignore the fact you have asked countless times or hinted toward it...its very frustrating.. we have learned to just go with our instinct and block...trust your gut feeling! . Absolutely right go with your first good feeling for me. The hasta be an attraction there so if you feel comfortable, you do share if you don’t don’t share

I agree with this viewpoint but interested in why others have shared why they don't. For me there needs to be that initial attraction, then a social to see them in real life and get a feel for them. The kids is a big deal for me.

The part I find strange - is them wanting to see you but not reciprocating. That would set my warning radar off aswell. I don't feel it should be a one way transaction.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it doesn’t seem quite right, it usually isn’t.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never sent a face pic before meeting, i've been swinging since approx 2005.

I have a non playing social first, in a public place. Nowadays i only meet to play in a club so that means i see and interact with the person first with no problems. If i'm arranging to meet a guy in a club i still have a social first too, either in the club or somewhere public.

If the guy isn't happy with that then it means we aren't suited so no meet is arranged.

Works well for me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

However this could be a guy pretending to be a couple though. He could have took the fem pics off the internet etc.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

We never send face pics as we have no idea who we are sending them to or what they may do with them. Equally, we never ask for them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iddle ManMan
over a year ago

Walsall

It is each to their own of course but I don't agree someone demanding face pics and then not sending it back in return. Perfectly happy to send face pics on arranging meets, but also see why please don't want to send them to strangers on here. Just respect people's choice.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

We all do things differently and for our own reasons. We don’t do socials, but if we’ve chatted to people on here for a while we will share face pics. But we will only meet at Clubs first. So Fab is really an opportunity to find people we fancy, in the hope that they may turn up to a Club when we do (we post meets). Though even if the planets align and we see people at Clubs we may not actually fancy each other. But in the plus side, we’re in a Club and will likely find someone to pass the time with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *9 TeaCouple
over a year ago

London/Essex

There needs to be attraction for us first to make an effort to organise a meet, so for us it's face pics or bye.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

I understand some people saying that is what a social meeting is for.

However

I'm not going to put precious time into a social (getting ready, travel etc) if a simple face pic could quickly help me decide that they'll be no attraction.

I genuinely do not understand what the issue is.

You can set it to delete once viewed.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilverfox for youMan
over a year ago

Hull

Yes say no face pic no meet !!!otherwise you are right to be suspicious

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ooo wet tight hornyWoman
over a year ago

lancashire

"Check images via Google search engine

How do you do that?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's probably a guy pretending to be a couple for wank material. We get loads and you can spot them a mile away."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmmmmm, older guy, younger girl, dating a year and she’s very “inexperienced” by the sounds of it. Maybe I’m just worrying over nothing"

Sounds like you've given him loads to wank about.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Check images via Google search engine

How do you do that? "

Some browsers have it built in but others you can use extensions that will provide a right-click type option to do a reverse search on various indexes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

"I have never sent a face pic before meeting, i've been swinging since approx 2005.

If the guy isn't happy with that then it means we aren't suited so no meet is arranged.

Works well for me

I am the same.

Plus I’ll tell them I am really ugly if I don’t fancy them.

Works for me so far

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *an hjCouple
over a year ago

Stowmarket

Never sent a face picture, never ask for one either.

Some very good looking idiots out there, respect and politeness is far more important to me than looks.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *9 TeaCouple
over a year ago

London/Essex

It seems to be an thing with people older, it could be as swinging used to be a much bigger taboo than it is now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *stwoCouple
over a year ago

anywhere

We never do facials and we never ask.If we meet and its not for either party a polite no thanks is not a problem.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky and QuirkyCouple
over a year ago

Leighton Buzzard

For what it is worth we find exactly the same as a couple with many single guys. All very enthusiastic and keen and then nothing!!! We try and encourage a video call to check and assess fit/personality.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sWilburWoman
over a year ago

sw london

I’ve had the same thing recently

I just ignore their messages now

I can’t meet someone without seeing recent face pics or having a FaceTime call.

Agree with you something doesn’t sit right. Go with your gut!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It seems to be an thing with people older, it could be as swinging used to be a much bigger taboo than it is now."

Swinging wasn't a bigger Taboo, the swinging 60's wasn't because of the music style. It is more the numbing and normalisation of online exposure, putting your life on social media, smart/camera phones, and the WYSIWYG of online shopping.

Some people do not want their lives and faces sent into the either forever more. Once someone else has a copy of your face on their device you can not delete it from their device. You can not stop their device from syncing your face with their online/offline storage/backup. You have no idea what apps or who else has access to their device or storage/backup.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wont meet anyone even for a social without knowing what they look like, I'm obviously happy to show my face too.

I have to know if there is an initial attraction then happy to meet socially to see if that spark is still there in person.

I understand not everyone likes doing things that way and that's absolutely fine we're just not compatible.

If it doesn't feel right it rarely is right. Always go with your gut.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ature SpiceCouple
over a year ago

Bury

Is a meet imminent or are you just chatting to see if you are compatible? We only send out face pics when we have decided we are going to meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread