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What on earth am I doing?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/03/23 19:58:59]

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Deleted my original message pressing the wrong buttons!!

Hi everyone, I am very new to all of this. I met Si on a dating app and we started meeting up for fun. We have developed our fun into a casual relationship and so set up a profile on here as we want to play together.

Prior to meeting Si I was married for 23 years and very much in a vanilla sex type set up. I wanted to explore and he is certainly helping me do that.

I am very much comfortable with hot wife scenario and we’ve done that a few times. I want to explore further but can’t seem to get out of my own head. We went to a social on Saturday and I felt out of my depth and then a couple invited us to play this week and I panicked. Any advice or guidance on how to just enjoy this and explore my boundaries?

Thank you xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you tried events ? You can go socialise , watch ,be watched no pressure to play with anyone whilst you might do if you want to and find someone who would like to as well

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Back right off and stick to social meets for a bit.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Also I suggest getting involved I organising the meets you'll feel more involved and in control

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great post as I'm just out of a 30 yr relationship and signed up for Swansea social in May. Keen but nervous at the same time.

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I'll never really understand why so many women on here want to push themselves to do things they feel so obviously uncomfortable about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take your time. You don’t need to do it all straight away.

I am part of a couples profile and much the same as yourself was in a very vanilla marriage.

Fast forward to when I met my partner and we decided we’d like to be part of this lifestyle.

It took a while to decide what worked for us and what we were comfortable with.

We had socials and attended clubs. We didn’t meet another couple in a sexual way until we felt we were ready to.

Boundaries and communication are key.

It’s not for everyone and there’s nothing wrong with that.

I hope it all works out for you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have you tried events ? You can go socialise , watch ,be watched no pressure to play with anyone whilst you might do if you want to and find someone who would like to as well "
yes events are great we agree .. watch and be watched …

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By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

We've done a few socials now but I still get anxious and overwhelmed. We try and find outher people who are going ahead of the event so there are a few friendly faces to chat to on the night. We have played but only if it feels right at the time. So I turned down going into an open room for example but will play in a locked one. It's all about taking your time and feeling comfortable.

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By *hisky_and_Wine_69Couple
over a year ago

Gloucester & West Mids

Take a step back and decide what it is you’re looking to explore.

Then (as others have said), try the socials again.

Don’t overthink it, a social is just a night out down the pub but with people you can have like minded and open conversations with. Never go out feeling like you ‘have’ to play, a lot of people on the scene who attend socials and clubs sometimes just like the socialising aspect in an accepting environment but then go home to play alone as a couple.

There are no hard and fast rules here, take your time to find your own comfort zone and if and when you’re ready for more you’ll have built up a great network of friends to begin your journey.

Relax and just enjoy meeting people you meet along the way as you would any new friends. Xx

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