FabSwingers.com forum: Profiles!

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

Don’t know we are writing this in the right section but…

Do you actually think people read your bio before messaging you?

Myself & L have a word in our bio that when you come to message us you put it in the subject part of the message.

Just curious of other peoples thoughts

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Not everyone that’s for sure …

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

I think it's probably half and half as regards others reading mine.

I don't put a word in it though,that's a bit naff, each to their own though...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

One of those some do some don't and choose to ignore

I prefer to read it's like an introduction

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We read them. Quite a few people don't.

A canny messager will scan for a special word though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

They could've just scrolled through found the word and added it within the subject

It doesn't make sense

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

I think it's probably half and half as regards others reading mine.

I don't put a word in it though,that's a bit naff, each to their own though...

It’s a word at the end so we know someone’s actually took time out and is genuine about messaging us

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

we read profiles and respect peoples wishes

have found not everybody does, they see pics they like then approach us for what they want, no regard for our boundaries.

Putting a word in to test if people have paid attention seems a bit childish to me but each to their own.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's quite obvious that the majority of those who do message me haven't read my profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

It is each to their own I get that

But we’ve definitely caught a couple of people out because they’ve asked us about stuff and clearly it’s stated in our profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

I think it's probably half and half as regards others reading mine.

I don't put a word in it though,that's a bit naff, each to their own though...

It’s a word at the end so we know someone’s actually took time out and is genuine about messaging us "

I haven't read your profile but you've put the word in upper case so I spotted it easily.

It's your absolute right to require people to quote a word in messages though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

I think it's probably half and half as regards others reading mine.

I don't put a word in it though,that's a bit naff, each to their own though...

It’s a word at the end so we know someone’s actually took time out and is genuine about messaging us

I haven't read your profile but you've put the word in upper case so I spotted it easily.

It's your absolute right to require people to quote a word in messages though

Perhaps change it to lower case then

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

I think it's probably half and half as regards others reading mine.

I don't put a word in it though,that's a bit naff, each to their own though...

It’s a word at the end so we know someone’s actually took time out and is genuine about messaging us

I haven't read your profile but you've put the word in upper case so I spotted it easily.

It's your absolute right to require people to quote a word in messages though

Perhaps change it to lower case then

Up to you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

In our experience the majority of single guys don't and then get butt hurt when they get turned down.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyAndFunCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

nope, we get dozens of guys with no pics, 200 miles away, asking to stay over at our house.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nonymous95-2Woman
over a year ago

Northwich

I honestly believe a lot don't. They go to the end and find the word or a phrase to message off. I put a bit at the top just for clarity on the message and a lot come up with something from my last 2 sentences. Which makes it clear they haven't. Or they read the first then ignore the middle about a social.

But it's a way to filter them I've found.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some do some dont

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"nope, we get dozens of guys with no pics, 200 miles away, asking to stay over at our house....."

Well that’s not unusual at all lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"In our experience the majority of single guys don't and then get butt hurt when they get turned down."

Butt hurt ??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *an hjCouple
over a year ago

Stowmarket

Probably 80% haven't read our profile when they first message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To those whose never realised it; hiding a "word" is not very tricky when you know people do it and just need to scan for quotation marks. Usually in the last paragraph or two on especially lengthy profiles.

If you want to hide a test in your profile, feel free, make it clever and I'll happily engage.

Otherwise understand it's trivial to bypass when everyone follows the same pattern.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope. Our profile explains quite clearly who,where and how we meet and our most common message is where are you from? Even though it says on our profile. That’s why we only meet at clubs now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

"In our experience the majority of single guys don't and then get butt hurt when they get turned down.

Butt hurt ??"

It generally means have a tantrum. It's more of an American term.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In our experience the majority of single guys don't and then get butt hurt when they get turned down."

It's not just single men who are guilty of this. There are some women and couples don't bother to read profiles either

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Melons.

Didn’t read the overlong set of “rules”

Bit pointless init?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"Melons.

Didn’t read the overlong set of “rules”

Bit pointless init? "

How can it be pointless wouldn’t it be a waste of time if you messages someone saying something but yet in their profile it states that’s not what they are looking for?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"To those whose never realised it; hiding a "word" is not very tricky when you know people do it and just need to scan for quotation marks. Usually in the last paragraph or two on especially lengthy profiles.

If you want to hide a test in your profile, feel free, make it clever and I'll happily engage.

Otherwise understand it's trivial to bypass when everyone follows the same pattern. "

I put "So we know you've read the profile please put whatever you want as the subject of any message" at the end of our profile.

I actually meant for people to put whatever they wanted, but the number of people who send us messages where the title is 'Whatever you want' is hilarious, so maybe more people do read profiles than some give credit for....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *azylivingMan
over a year ago

random location

I have a crossword to complete and a riddle to answer before you get to secret word that will allow you to message me so I know people read my profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Most don't read mine ,I can tell by the amount of smokers ,Dom's and men miles away that message.

Or the you free ? What you up to /into messages .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

If you want to hide a test in your profile, feel free, make it clever and I'll happily engage.

Otherwise understand it's trivial to bypass when everyone follows the same pattern.

I put "So we know you've read the profile please put whatever you want as the subject of any message" at the end of our profile.

That’s brilliant lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

"In our experience the majority of single guys don't and then get butt hurt when they get turned down.

It's not just single men who are guilty of this. There are some women and couples don't bother to read profiles either"

Yes of course, but in our experience the vast majority of couples and women that message us have read our profile...guys on the other hand it's pretty rare.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"Most don't read mine ,I can tell by the amount of smokers ,Dom's and men miles away that message.

Or the you free ? What you up to /into messages ."

I bet you get that a lot as a single woman

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"Most don't read mine ,I can tell by the amount of smokers ,Dom's and men miles away that message.

Or the you free ? What you up to /into messages .

I bet you get that a lot as a single woman"

I use quite a lot of filters ,so not as much as many women lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

I can tell if someone has read my profile when they message me. If it's obvious that they haven't read it, their message gets ignored. If they can't be arsed to read my profile they won't be arsed about mutual pleasure on a meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Melons.

Didn’t read the overlong set of “rules”

Bit pointless init?

How can it be pointless wouldn’t it be a waste of time if you messages someone saying something but yet in their profile it states that’s not what they are looking for? "

I meant the inclusion of a code word.

Doesn’t mean they’ve read the profile at all.

I didn’t.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"In our experience the majority of single guys don't and then get butt hurt when they get turned down.

It's not just single men who are guilty of this. There are some women and couples don't bother to read profiles either

Yes of course, but in our experience the vast majority of couples and women that message us have read our profile...guys on the other hand it's pretty rare."

Experiences vary.

Most guys that message us have clearly read the profile.

Couples? Plenty message asking to meet us when we don't have them listed as being our target audience and there's literally no mention anywhere in our profile of us meeting couples.

So..........

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aribbean King 1985Man
over a year ago

South West London

I always read a profile before I message a person. If I'm not what a woman's looking for I don't message them, however I don't think some people read mines with straight couples being the biggest culprits.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

We read profiles before messaging but it's obvious from messages we get that a lot of people either don't read ours or just ignore it (outside age range, rude etc)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anted by NightMan
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

This

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read them.

I also read verifications as I feel those the person has met tell a lot about them too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebootCouple
over a year ago

Telford

The vast majority of profiles that make contact with us in one way or another (message/wink) have clearly not read our profile as when we check them out, they’re interests or dynamics are nothing like what we or they are looking for

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago

shropshire

"Don’t know we are writing this in the right section but…

Do you actually think people read your bio before messaging you?

Myself & L have a word in our bio that when you come to message us you put it in the subject part of the message.

Just curious of other peoples thoughts

Xx"

Good idea about the word ...

Not everyone reads them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ympho6969Woman
over a year ago

glasgow

If I message first, always. If they message first, depends on the message but if I reply, generally yes

No point chatting if they have age limits or won't meet smokers

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aribbean King 1985Man
over a year ago

South West London

Why do some couples message me through a singles profile??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebootCouple
over a year ago

Telford

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

This

What do you consider long?

Ours is fairly big in comparison to most which takes about 60 seconds to read.

A long profile is generally already a great filter system used by those who write them - as it filters out those with an incompatible mindset and attitude.

Our thoughts being, if you can’t invest 60 seconds in us as human beings that you might want to get intimate with, then you haven’t got the mindset that we believe in and would consider getting intimate with.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

This

What do you consider long?

Ours is fairly big in comparison to most which takes about 60 seconds to read.

A long profile is generally already a great filter system used by those who write them - as it filters out those with an incompatible mindset and attitude.

That was exactly our thoughts

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ewCoupleHXCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

We always read profile before messaging or replying but we find the whole word quoting thing a bit silly and unless we are really impressed by a profile, we typically browse past.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

"Why do some couples message me through a singles profile??"

Because they aren't really a couple.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aribbean King 1985Man
over a year ago

South West London

"Why do some couples message me through a singles profile??

Because they aren't really a couple. "
I don't get it, if a woman says shes married and has a couple profile as well a single profile are you say they're not really married??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *astesLikeMagicWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

I read them if their pictures interest me in taking it further.

I don't play the 'use this word/ phrase' game though.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anted by NightMan
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

This

What do you consider long?

Ours is fairly big in comparison to most which takes about 60 seconds to read.

A long profile is generally already a great filter system used by those who write them - as it filters out those with an incompatible mindset and attitude.

Yours is longer than average but it’s to the point that what you are expecting and looking for and more positivity than most long profile here on fab. Being English isn’t my first language so it took me longer than 60 seconds to read lol.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ootprints1629Couple
over a year ago

somewhere in moray

"I read them but if they are too long I don't bother or reply.

I think it's probably half and half as regards others reading mine.

I don't put a word in it though,that's a bit naff, each to their own though...

It’s a word at the end so we know someone’s actually took time out and is genuine about messaging us "

There are alot of people who scan bio quickly just to find the word weather it's un the middle or at the end..we have come to realise that it's a waste of time, even though its still their, you know of aomeone has read it properly and the ones who scan, they will trip themselves up!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I read them, if it's long it depends how interested I am as to if I'll read it all, but if I make it half way through and get bored I wouldn't message, just means they aren't for me.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Generally, I'd say not many do read.

However, when we state in our profile that we're not looking, the amount of messages drop, and when we state we're looking, we become inundated.

Often they'll state they've read our profile, but still go on to ask questions that can be found in our bio.

Also, I added at the beginning that Mr takes care of messages, that slowed our inbox, and the next line expresses that we're not available.

I think, the few read thoroughly, many skim over the profile to see what interests them, while others go no further than looking at the pictures and/or verifications.

If we find we may be interested, although feel they may not have read our bio, we'll state that by saying .... We may be interested, though please do have a read through our bio and get back to us if it genuinely interests you.

It seems to help.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t know we are writing this in the right section but…

Do you actually think people read your bio before messaging you?

Myself & L have a word in our bio that when you come to message us you put it in the subject part of the message.

Just curious of other peoples thoughts

Xx"

I think most people do read profiles. Or at least scan them then don't message.

It's the minority who don't read and send messages anyway.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't play the 'use this word/ phrase' game though. "

This exactly, it's a site for adults and that's a child's game, not just you OP but everyone who adds that to their bio. I found it as well as something I won't go into and I know nothing about you because I didn't read it, just a 2 second scan

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

Do mean "melons" OP?

And no, I haven't read your profile.

They are always put in roughly the same place.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

How about putting the special word in the first couple of lines, then about half way through say it's a different one?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How about putting the special word in the first couple of lines, then about half way through say it's a different one? "

Do it a few times and make it like a treasure hunt

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"How about putting the special word in the first couple of lines, then about half way through say it's a different one?

Do it a few times and make it like a treasure hunt

But I am actually serious. It's quite easy to scan through and spot a code word and not reading profiles is fairly common, very few read ours. I thought that might be a way of circumventing the scanners and non readers

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

"Why do some couples message me through a singles profile??

Because they aren't really a couple. I don't get it, if a woman says shes married and has a couple profile as well a single profile are you say they're not really married??"

If they have a couples profile as well then that usually check out.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I read the profile before I message. It saves a lot of time on both parts.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always read profiles, always have and put in those telltale words if suggested in their profiles.. doesn't result in any more replies at all, but I do it anyway because i understand it helps the recipient delete less appropriate messages without having to open and read every one.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I read them if their pictures interest me in taking it further.

I don't play the 'use this word/ phrase' game though. "

This. Puts me off straight away. It comes across as demanding and slightly childish.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We tried that with a word, but 99% messaged without using the word.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anted by NightMan
over a year ago

Shangri-La

I like profiles with only Sydney University warning.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rPeachPiercedPrincess OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

Mixed feelings then when it comes to bios in profiles

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always read people's bios. I'm looking to see how compatible we might be before messaging.

Stuff that would encourage me to message/reply based on bio:

Telling Syndey Uni they can fill their boots!

Good spelling/grammar. You don't need to be a wordsmith but it demonstrates a level of effort has been made. If you are keen to make effort in your bio, with what else might you make an effort?

Being clear who you are and what you're looking for. I want to know where I stand.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t know we are writing this in the right section but…

Do you actually think people read your bio before messaging you?

Myself & L have a word in our bio that when you come to message us you put it in the subject part of the message.

Just curious of other peoples thoughts

Xx"

Hallelujah

It says it all in the profile!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread