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Long term FWB

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By *arieanne OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cork

How do you manage a long term FWB without getting it messy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you just have to be honest.

Firstly with yourself, what do you want? If it's a good friend you can fuck, that's okay. If it's more than a friend, that's okay too, but that's the starting point.

I'm assuming you just want the fun without the feelings and you're worried they're getting feelings?

Straight back to honesty. You just need to level with them, and tell them (men like bluntness) that you enjoy being their friend, and you want to keep fucking, but that there's no chance of anything more than that. If they want more, you have to encourage them to get that, but reenforce that it won't be with you. If they still can't have a good fuck without bringing it up after that, then you just have to stop seeing them since it's not fair on them. Bit brutal, but long term it's the best thing.

Good luck!

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

Find one that will never want to be your boyfriend... I don't want a boyfriend... My fwb of 6 years would never want me as his girlfriend... Works out for both of us

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Messy in what way?

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By *arieanne OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cork

Getting feelings

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I'd find it unusual not to feel something towards someone you spend time with on a regular basis

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton


"Getting feelings "

Feelings are fine but most people mistake new person excitement and emotional attachment with being in love, they aren't the same... I love my fwb, he loves me... We will never be in love, despite our bloody fantastic relationship... We aare just making the most of our time as we know it will eventually end

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

It isn’t easy.

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By *reatmekindWoman
over a year ago

West Suffolk

I've been learning to navigate this for the first time. It has messed with my head a little that's for sure! I just keep trying to remind myself that we aren't together and he doesn't owe me anything xx

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

I’ve found it really difficult tbh OP. I’ve had 6 FWBs over the years and all of them have caught feelings for me… there will always be emotions and care between you but some people find it hard to keep the connection only on a sexual level. Communication is key. Hope you find what you’re looking for

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester


"How do you manage a long term FWB without getting it messy?"

I'll let you know, I'm at the beginning of what is likely me going exclusive with a couple, we will play equal as Bi and I will not see anyone else whilst they have me. If it doesn't work out I'll go back to the scene. Saturday is D-Day for decision after a pretty good period of bedding in.

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By *al kalMan
over a year ago

london


"Getting feelings "

You developing feelings or the other person? Or both.

Which scenario would have the biggest concern for you?

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By *entative_CuckMan
over a year ago

Cirencester

This is my big concern about cuckolding. My mrs said she would be interested in FWB, whereas I naively thought it would just be sex.

We are still working out if we actually want to go down the cuckolding route for real or just keep as fantasy. Therefore I'm really interested to hear everyone's experiences and opinions.

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire


"This is my big concern about cuckolding. My mrs said she would be interested in FWB, whereas I naively thought it would just be sex.

We are still working out if we actually want to go down the cuckolding route for real or just keep as fantasy. Therefore I'm really interested to hear everyone's experiences and opinions."

How do you envisage her navigating the friendship part with another man?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Communication is the key

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion, rotate eg more than one person or you'll catch feels!

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By *atisfiedSighWoman
over a year ago

NW Wiltshire

Ideally my fwbs are generally unavailable people so that there's a barrier against getting too involved. I have a Fearful attachment style and find normal friendships difficult for the same reason.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Lay the rules down at the beginning so both understand them

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By *urora1912Woman
over a year ago

Norfolk East anglia

I've had a fwb for nearly 7 months and unfortunately he's moving away due to work.

It hurts because I'm loosing someone I've got an amazing friendship with and who's been a big part of my life

But I knew it could happen at some point with him being in the forces... or if one of us met someone and ended the fwb set up.

Neither of us want to be with the other in a relationship, we've just got the great friendship

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"Find one that will never want to be your boyfriend... I don't want a boyfriend... My fwb of 6 years would never want me as his girlfriend... Works out for both of us "

This.

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By *thfloorCouple
over a year ago

Hove


"I've been learning to navigate this for the first time. It has messed with my head a little that's for sure! I just keep trying to remind myself that we aren't together and he doesn't owe me anything xx"

Sad to read this. Yes he doesn't owe you anything, you obviously have emotional needs that are not being met though. Perhaps this arrangement is not serving you as well as you think it does? Be kind to yourself first.

Sorry for going OT! But if I have to kill my tenderness I don't want the sex. The world is unfeeling enough.

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By *onlywishiMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

It’s all about fun and laughter making each other feel everything you’d like to feel in a relationship but !! Not having the downside of everyday life ? Remember always it’s fun nothing more !!

Set your boundaries with them about what you both need from each other and stick to it ?

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By *urvySub87Woman
over a year ago

Near Wellingborough


"How do you manage a long term FWB without getting it messy?"

I think that not getting feelings is quite difficult. The respectful thing to do is keep those feelings to yourself if you know they don't want more than sex or end things. Unfortunately both options are difficult too

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By *reatmekindWoman
over a year ago

West Suffolk


"I've been learning to navigate this for the first time. It has messed with my head a little that's for sure! I just keep trying to remind myself that we aren't together and he doesn't owe me anything xx

Sad to read this. Yes he doesn't owe you anything, you obviously have emotional needs that are not being met though. Perhaps this arrangement is not serving you as well as you think it does? Be kind to yourself first.

Sorry for going OT! But if I have to kill my tenderness I don't want the sex. The world is unfeeling enough."

It's funny you should say that. I'm actually married and my emotional needs are absolutely not met. He can be quite abusive (emotionally) but that's a story for another day. But it's part of the reason I joined fab and I've been lucky to meet the FWB that I have. Still hard to navigate though. This is a first for me! X

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By *ichelinstar1Man
over a year ago

Peterborough & North West


"How do you manage a long term FWB without getting it messy?

I think that not getting feelings is quite difficult. The respectful thing to do is keep those feelings to yourself if you know they don't want more than sex or end things. Unfortunately both options are difficult too "

Been there and worn the T-shirt on both ends of the spectrum. There’s a fine line between a FWB and a relationship. Key is to realise when things are getting a bit serious and have an open and honest conversation. If both parties want something more, then why not? If people find some form of happiness through this site, then it’s a good thing.

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

taunton somerset


"This is my big concern about cuckolding. My mrs said she would be interested in FWB, whereas I naively thought it would just be sex.

We are still working out if we actually want to go down the cuckolding route for real or just keep as fantasy. Therefore I'm really interested to hear everyone's experiences and opinions."

you have to trust your wife these things are built on trust no trust then its not going to work im very clear with guys that friendship it sex based any over stepping that line then we woth see each other again im 100% my husbands wife alway have been always will be ... i have one regular ive know now for 20 years and another going toward 10 years works great ... if you afraid of your wife running of then id suggest swinging is not for you let alone cuckolding

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By *herrySnickersWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere

Have very clear boundaries or just become polyamorous!

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