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advice needed

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I am enjoying the swinging experience, met some amazing people and made some good friends through this but......

My ex has now returned and wants to restart what we had, we have a son together and I feel by saying no I will be letting him down by not having the chance to have both parents with him. I don't know if I still love her, when we are together its good but I know things get bad quickly with her.

I want to give it a shot but I'm scared if it goes bad then we might lose any friendship we have.

any advice from people that have been through the same thing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it isnt always in a childs best interest to have 2 parents who r together.. especially if they have shown once they dont get along, its more damaging for him to see a bad relationship than to maintain a good relationship with both parents who r apart

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

My ex and I split back in the summer after a few years of hell which I tried to hang on to for the sake of our son, admitted defeat and he got a new girlfriend quickly. They've split now and he's started dropping hints that he's after us maybe sorting things.

There's no way In the world I would get back with him. Yeah the good times were good but the bad times were awful and at least now I know my son has 2 parents who don't fight and argue all the time because we have him seperately. Never how I wanted things to turn out but the best for everyone given the circumstances xxx

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Having grown up with two parents who hated being with each other but stayed together 'for the children' personally I would say don't do it. Its horrible for children when they know they are the reason why their parents are unhappy. Me and my ex split even though we were good friends, and remain good friends even now, by staying apart!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think of it from your point of view not the childs do you want it to work? Would you be considering it if no child was involved?

Its a nice idea but if your not commited to it then its unlikely to work.

Not a nice decision to make good luck whatever happens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speaking as someone whose parents split, having two parents who got on ok apart was infinitely preferable to being in the situation where they were together and fighting. Hope you get sorted dude.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Speaking as someone whose parents split, having two parents who got on ok apart was infinitely preferable to being in the situation where they were together and fighting. Hope you get sorted dude. "

I wanted to post something like this but couldn't find the right way to say it.So,thank you and well said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're welcome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your not letting your child down by not getting back together

Having parents who live together isnt always best for a child

A child is better with two parents who are happy apart than you getting back together for the sake of the child and then end up resenting each other and arguing while hes listerning to you in bed

my biggest regret in life is not splitting up with my ex sooner, i stayed with him for years because of my kids but now they are older they tell me thing like they remember being upstairs while we was fighting etc i feel so guilty for that and for what i subjected them to. i now realise that what i thought was for the best was actually making me a shit mother, but i cant change the past, i can only try to do better by them now

If you want to get back together do it if its what you really want but dont do it for your child

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Speaking as someone whose parents split, having two parents who got on ok apart was infinitely preferable to being in the situation where they were together and fighting. Hope you get sorted dude. "

yes totally agree

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By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich


"My ex and I split back in the summer after a few years of hell which I tried to hang on to for the sake of our son, admitted defeat and he got a new girlfriend quickly. They've split now and he's started dropping hints that he's after us maybe sorting things.

There's no way In the world I would get back with him. Yeah the good times were good but the bad times were awful and at least now I know my son has 2 parents who don't fight and argue all the time because we have him seperately. Never how I wanted things to turn out but the best for everyone given the circumstances xxx "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's definitely better for a child to have two happy parents rather than parents that stay together and argue all the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/12/12 14:54:08]

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