FabSwingers.com forum: Our Profile

By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

Just sat here wondering ???? JUST been told our profile makes us sound like we are right up our own arse's !!!

We have read through it a few times and just don't understand where they make that assumption form ????

Could you have a look see what we are missing Please !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your profile does seem to be focussed on bodily aesthetics in parts.

I am guessing that the message was from someone who didn't fit the criteria and/or (possibly) has a poor body image of their own ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just sat here wondering ???? JUST been told our profile makes us sound like we are right up our own arse's !!!

We have read through it a few times and just don't understand where they make that assumption form ????

Could you have a look see what we are missing Please !!!!

I think the problem lies with others...

You state you are 'well groomed, toned & neither ugly'

I think the people that would object to that are the people who are not.

It reads just fine to me.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Reads fine to me too!!! X x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your profile does seem to be focussed on bodily aesthetics in parts.

I am guessing that the message was from someone who didn't fit the criteria and/or (possibly) has a poor body image of their own ?

as I was saying Bussy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is something not quite right, can't really put my finger on it though. Not up your own arse, but possibly a little too demanding/picky, officious? Put it this way, if I saw your profile for the first time, you would not be top of my list to contact. Sorry I can't pinpoint it exactly.

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Your profile does seem to be focussed on bodily aesthetics in parts.

I am guessing that the message was from someone who didn't fit the criteria and/or (possibly) has a poor body image of their own ?

Hi i understand where you are coming from,and yes we would like the people we meet to be in good shape and look after themselves. We want to act out some of our fantasy's and our fantasy's are with people who look after themselves.

We have found that in clubs you can meet very sexy people by there personality and not just image but on here its very hard to do that.

Thanks for your input

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cant see it...

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Just sat here wondering ???? JUST been told our profile makes us sound like we are right up our own arse's !!!

We have read through it a few times and just don't understand where they make that assumption form ????

Could you have a look see what we are missing Please !!!!

I think the problem lies with others...

You state you are 'well groomed, toned & neither ugly'

I think the people that would object to that are the people who are not.

It reads just fine to me.

Thank you x

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"There is something not quite right, can't really put my finger on it though. Not up your own arse, but possibly a little too demanding/picky, officious? Put it this way, if I saw your profile for the first time, you would not be top of my list to contact. Sorry I can't pinpoint it exactly.

We are picky i will not deny it, if you suss it out let us know.

Thank you for the help all the same

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Reads fine to me too!!! X x "

Thank you ! x

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I cant see it..."

Thank you for looking all the same x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/11/12 13:45:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your profile does seem to be focussed on bodily aesthetics in parts.

I am guessing that the message was from someone who didn't fit the criteria and/or (possibly) has a poor body image of their own ?

We have found that in clubs you can meet very sexy people by there personality and not just image but on here its very hard to do that.

Thanks for your input

All we are afforded here is a 2D image and often a few words to help us to decide message or not message.

They don't afford us a personality as such - therefore I can understand why aesthetics are important.

What I don't understand though is how huffy people get about people stating their preferences.

If I read your profile, I would think 'OK, they don't meet chubby guys or hairy guys, so that's me out' and then carry on looking.

It wouldn't cross my mind to think, 'well I fancy them but they won't fancy me, so I'll send a shitty message because what does it matter anyway ?'

I can understand preferences. I can't understand people objecting to someone elses - unless they are stated in a rude or obnoxious manner, which yours aren't.

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Your profile does seem to be focussed on bodily aesthetics in parts.

I am guessing that the message was from someone who didn't fit the criteria and/or (possibly) has a poor body image of their own ?

We have found that in clubs you can meet very sexy people by there personality and not just image but on here its very hard to do that.

Thanks for your input

All we are afforded here is a 2D image and often a few words to help us to decide message or not message.

They don't afford us a personality as such - therefore I can understand why aesthetics are important.

What I don't understand though is how huffy people get about people stating their preferences.

If I read your profile, I would think 'OK, they don't meet chubby guys or hairy guys, so that's me out' and then carry on looking.

It wouldn't cross my mind to think, 'well I fancy them but they won't fancy me, so I'll send a shitty message because what does it matter anyway ?'

I can understand preferences. I can't understand people objecting to someone elses - unless they are stated in a rude or obnoxious manner, which yours aren't.

I hope not as we are not like that at all, this is why i posted as we didn't want to portray something we are not !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I cant see it...

Thank you for looking all the same x"

i meant I cant see it , as in u's being up ur own arses lol..Ive seen much worse on others profiles thatd put me off to an extent in the unfriendliness aspect...of course I'd still consider shagging them.

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I cant see it...

Thank you for looking all the same x

lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope not as we are not like that at all, this is why i posted as we didn't want to portray something we are not ! "

Don't feel the need to question yourselves on the reaction of one person.

If your profile is working for you then it is doing it's job.

After all, it should work for the two of you as opposed to working for anyone else.

Some will buy into it and some won't - but that really is there problem, not yours.

My profile here is deliberately non specific as I use this site largely for its forums.

On the other hand, I have a profile on another site that is VERY specific.

I don't get a lot of messages, but those I do get are from people on exactly the same page of the book as me.

That generally leads to meets and meets that you remember, and that remains the important thing.

Not to mention, being specific rather than general saves me a lot of effort in going down avenues that I suspect are going to be dead ends anyway.

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

[Removed by poster at 26/11/12 14:01:09]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the guy is only bitter as he doesnt meet what u r looking for.. ive had the same sort of thing a few times..

also been told things like am i having a laugh im so ugly why am i looking.. and everytime its someone who doesnt fit what im looking for.. sad bitter and wander why they get no where :/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's a very good profile - not too short or too long, not too many silly rules, but enough idea to let us know what you'd like so we don't waste our time. I'm sure you've not had any problems with it before and you won't get any in the future.

Mark it down as an exception and do nothing!

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"the guy is only bitter as he doesnt meet what u r looking for.. ive had the same sort of thing a few times..

also been told things like am i having a laugh im so ugly why am i looking.. and everytime its someone who doesnt fit what im looking for.. sad bitter and wander why they get no where :/"

I would like to say its nice to see other get it too BUT its not really i just don't see why they just don't move on if they don't like what they read.

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I think it's a very good profile - not too short or too long, not too many silly rules, but enough idea to let us know what you'd like so we don't waste our time. I'm sure you've not had any problems with it before and you won't get any in the future.

Mark it down as an exception and do nothing!"

Thank you !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't see anything wrong with your profile at all - their loss and it's a shame some folk feel the need to slag others off for no reason other than to make themselves feel better

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By *H.coupleCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Just sat here wondering ???? JUST been told our profile makes us sound like we are right up our own arse's !!!

We have read through it a few times and just don't understand where they make that assumption form ????

Could you have a look see what we are missing Please !!!!

Seems fine to us, you sound confident and you know what you want.

Its a bit hard to get your personalities across on a profile description. We're sure they'll be plenty of people that will like what they see/read so just concentrate on them and block the ones that aren't

Good luck and more importantly have fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I cant see it...

Thank you for looking all the same x"

you guys have a great file so nice to see what another couple are looking for keep up the great work guys xxxxx

rose and petexx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We agree profile and pics look fine the only part we would possibly change is the little bit about the ugly stick but thats down to personnel choice overall its fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me I felt that maybe people thought you were up your own arses with the line that you don’t think either of you has been beaten with the ugly stick, think about getting rid of it and add the word attractive to the first line eg we are a very happily married attractive couple.

Other than that, I really couldn't see anything else; you have an opening paragraph, a little about each of you, its divided into sections, sorry but I think it is actually okay other than the line I mentioned above but you will never please everyone so don't try.

There is a line however at the end that ends in VERY, you might want to finish it

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Just sat here wondering ???? JUST been told our profile makes us sound like we are right up our own arse's !!!

We have read through it a few times and just don't understand where they make that assumption form ????

Could you have a look see what we are missing Please !!!!

Seems fine to us, you sound confident and you know what you want.

Good luck and more importantly have fun

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I cant see it...

Thank you for looking all the same x

you guys have a great file so nice to see what another couple are looking for keep up the great work guys xxxxx

rose and petexx

Thank you !! x

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By *ngel n tedCouple
over a year ago

maidstone

Looks ok to me, appears that you've gone above n beyond to humour up the parts that could cause offence. You got your preferences and people should respect that. We don't meet couples personally, but it appears that some people think because couples swing, they are quite happy to farm the femme out to all and sundry. The person that messaged you obviously doesn't like rejection..........too many.....words...not used....to it, must stick to short replys

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"For me I felt that maybe people thought you were up your own arses with the line that you don’t think either of you has been beaten with the ugly stick, think about getting rid of it and add the word attractive to the first line eg we are a very happily married attractive couple.

There is a line however at the end that ends in VERY, you might want to finish it

Thank you for your views !! the ugly stick was a bit of a joke BUT if it does not read that way i would agree with you and it needs to go!

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"We agree profile and pics look fine the only part we would possibly change is the little bit about the ugly stick but thats down to personnel choice overall its fine."

Thats 2 that have comment about the ugly stick and as we said in another reply it was just a jokey bit but if its not readding that way its as good as gone .... Thanks for taking the time to review it x

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Looks ok to me, appears that you've gone above n beyond to humour up the parts that could cause offence. You got your preferences and people should respect that. We don't meet couples personally, but it appears that some people think because couples swing, they are quite happy to farm the femme out to all and sundry. The person that messaged you obviously doesn't like rejection..........too many.....words...not used....to it, must stick to short replys

Thank you ! xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's well written, and quite specific. I wonder if maybe you've got too much detail...after all if you chat to someone and you all get on you'll tell them whats relevant anyway...sorry just a thought....

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

I hope we have replied to everyone who has taken the time out to look at our profile and for your comments. We would like to say a big thank you to you all

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It's well written, and quite specific. I wonder if maybe you've got too much detail...after all if you chat to someone and you all get on you'll tell them whats relevant anyway...sorry just a thought...."

We understand your point but when we first joined we kept a very brief profile and not wanting to be rude to people who took the time out to mail us we tried to reply to everyone.

After a time and sore fingers from typing we changed it to give a little more detail to save people wasting there time because they might not be what we are looking for

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

Perfectly reasonable profile..accusing people of being up their own arse is a quite common reaction to rejection.

Just one thing though it does have the faintest hint of Job description speak...ie..'You must be a member....'

but I'm being really picky..lol

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Perfectly reasonable profile..accusing people of being up their own arse is a quite common reaction to rejection.

Just one thing though it does have the faintest hint of Job description speak...ie..'You must be a member....'

but I'm being really picky..lol"

lol we understand your point but it does say after a "swingers club" and you don't get asked that much in a job interview lol

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

"Perfectly reasonable profile..accusing people of being up their own arse is a quite common reaction to rejection.

Just one thing though it does have the faintest hint of Job description speak...ie..'You must be a member....'

but I'm being really picky..lol

lol we understand your point but it does say after a "swingers club" and you don't get asked that much in a job interview lol

It's the first question they always ask me!..perhaps I should start wearing A bra to them..lol

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Perfectly reasonable profile..accusing people of being up their own arse is a quite common reaction to rejection.

Just one thing though it does have the faintest hint of Job description speak...ie..'You must be a member....'

but I'm being really picky..lol

lol we understand your point but it does say after a "swingers club" and you don't get asked that much in a job interview lol

It's the first question they always ask me!..perhaps I should start wearing A bra to them..lol"

No i think just keep going bra-less, as a matter of fact i do have a job going would you like to apply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

perfect profile ! wouln't change a thing and if that offends the "odd" embittered moron that inhabits & infects FAB, tough !

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

"Perfectly reasonable profile..accusing people of being up their own arse is a quite common reaction to rejection.

Just one thing though it does have the faintest hint of Job description speak...ie..'You must be a member....'

but I'm being really picky..lol

lol we understand your point but it does say after a "swingers club" and you don't get asked that much in a job interview lol

It's the first question they always ask me!..perhaps I should start wearing A bra to them..lol

No i think just keep going bra-less, as a matter of fact i do have a job going would you like to apply

That's top flirting..but commuting to Bolton tricky!

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"perfect profile ! wouln't change a thing and if that offends the "odd" embittered moron that inhabits & infects FAB, tough ! "

LOL thank you

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By *he Ring WraithMan
over a year ago

Bradford

You both look good to me, (yeh i am a guy, but without being gay / bi i can realise when a guy looks good.).

It reads okay to me, but i lost interest when i realised you were not looking for guys but hey its your profile put on it what you like and enjoy what it brings.

if you dont get what you want, change it....

happy swinging xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your profile does seem to be focussed on bodily aesthetics in parts.

I am guessing that the message was from someone who didn't fit the criteria and/or (possibly) has a poor body image of their own ?

We have found that in clubs you can meet very sexy people by there personality and not just image but on here its very hard to do that.

Thanks for your input

I would go a little further than Bussy tbh...

Your profile does come over a 'bit' as if you are looking for people who will reinforce your focus on your own body image.

Nothing wrong in that, if that is what you want and are looking for, but your profile is littered with little references which, how can I put this..? 'Put people in their place'...??

Sorry if that's got your back up, but you did ask, and I had to be honest...

Pork

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

PS - have a look at TOANDFRO's profile (who have complimented you on yours) and compare it with yours....

Pork

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

picky is picky but youve been on for nearly 2 years and only met twice (as it seems) on here..

It would probably put people off as you promote yourselves as fun, outgoing and easy to get along with though dont pro actively meet?

If people are messaging you they are probably fine with anything you have on there - but it says you have rules .. rules like what, would come to mind -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

looks ok to us

some people get offended when you say you are picky.

our motto is just because we are swingers doesnt me we dont have standards

we have been accused of the same thing..so what

do what you want

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"PS - have a look at TOANDFRO's profile (who have complimented you on yours) and compare it with yours....

Pork"

perhaps suggesting a similarity !

clarity and focus is nothing to be ashamed of ! we don't have the time, energy or inclination to window shop the whole site.

It's about time management ! patently some have more time on their hands than others and if they choose to spend it trawling through profiles that aren't relevant, who are we to argue, unless of course they start whining about feeling excluded ! because someone had the timerity to be explicit about their requirements, tut tut !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"PS - have a look at TOANDFRO's profile (who have complimented you on yours) and compare it with yours....

Pork

perhaps suggesting a similarity !

clarity and focus is nothing to be ashamed of ! we don't have the time, energy or inclination to window shop the whole site.

Similarity? In what they are looking for, yes. But they go about it in a much more succinct way. Compare the two and I would be attracted by theirs, but would be reticent about messaging you - although you are a looking for very similar things.

THEY understood that - hence their complimentary comment - they spotted in yours things that click with them.

Does that make sense..??

Pork

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

think we'll agree to disagree on this one ! vive la differance !

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"picky is picky but youve been on for nearly 2 years and only met twice (as it seems) on here..

It would probably put people off as you promote yourselves as fun, outgoing and easy to get along with though dont pro actively meet?

If people are messaging you they are probably fine with anything you have on there - but it says you have rules .. rules like what, would come to mind -

We have been on nearly 2 years yes you are correct .... in that time we have been to Chameleons around 10 times ... No 3 club around 7 times ... infusion twice... partners 4 times ... cupids once (was not impressed) each time we have been we have had great times at most places BUT we do not give out our Fab name and do not ask for people to write a verification.

We have also had 3 verifications disappear as they left the site.

As for the rules when we chat to someone we like and IF they liked us we would discuss the rules. We are a married couple and i am afraid you make us having rules sound bad? but our relationship is more important to us than upsetting someone because they don't like the fact we have rules?

You have to remember as a single you only have to please yourself!

I have to say assuming just because a profile has no meets does not mean they do not meet people!

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

" You have to remember as a single you only have to please yourself!

I have to say assuming just because a profile has no meets does not mean they do not meet people! "

I take it by that you mean in tastes not pleasure - I suppose there may be difficulty there.

I can only go off you profile (which you have directed us to) so Im giving you my opinion on it, as others would.. Id be put off messaging as the time youve been on here and the number of veris you have, tell me you dont meet often, add that to rules and you get an unrelaxed meet.

Maybe the guys that are contacting you either are having similar doubts or they find someone who is more open about what they do.. who knows really..

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

" You have to remember as a single you only have to please yourself!

I have to say assuming just because a profile has no meets does not mean they do not meet people!

I take it by that you mean in tastes not pleasure - I suppose there may be difficulty there.

Maybe the guys that are contacting you either are having similar doubts or they find someone who is more open about what they do.. who knows really..

yes we do mean taste lololol

We were not fighting back regarding ur comment on meets just the fact that because we don't have lots of verifications it does not mean we don't meet

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

its always the case when people meet in clubs but maybe get a few names on - clubs are social and it'll make ya profile look that way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the end of the day it's what you both want there is no point going for Somone that won't turn u on and u don't like the look of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the profile sounds great, its clear and informative and sets out exactly what you are looking for.

If people, who more than likely don't fit the criteria, take offence to it then so be it, its up to you who you meet, its your body, therefore if the profile meets your needs then all is good.

I don't agree with abuse on profiles, ie, calling groups of people names etc, but this profile is not at all like that

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"At the end of the day it's what you both want there is no point going for Somone that won't turn u on and u don't like the look of

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I think the profile sounds great, its clear and informative and sets out exactly what you are looking for.

If people, who more than likely don't fit the criteria, take offence to it then so be it, its up to you who you meet, its your body, therefore if the profile meets your needs then all is good.

I don't agree with abuse on profiles, ie, calling groups of people names etc, but this profile is not at all like that

Thank you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just sat here wondering ???? JUST been told our profile makes us sound like we are right up our own arse's !!!

We have read through it a few times and just don't understand where they make that assumption form ????

Could you have a look see what we are missing Please !!!!

"
you look great, nice pics, profile says what you like.... Don't see the problem

You like trim and good looking people

What's the issue x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do see your point...but sometimes it can look like a shopping list...and I understand where you're coming from in terms of finding people that,

1....actually read the profile...

2....Have it relate to them in some way..

I think you'll be kissing a lot of frogs, before finding what you want..but sometimes thats the nature of the beast, because a lot of people are not honest...

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By *stwo661Couple
over a year ago

Fareham

Good profile,great pics guys,x

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I do see your point...but sometimes it can look like a shopping list...and I understand where you're coming from in terms of finding people that,

1....actually read the profile...

2....Have it relate to them in some way..

I think you'll be kissing a lot of frogs, before finding what you want..but sometimes thats the nature of the beast, because a lot of people are not honest..."

LOL to frogs !!!!

Like the look of your profile YOU seem to fit what we are looking for LOLOLOL

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By *ugartitsandhim OP Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Good profile,great pics guys,x"

Thank you xx

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