FabSwingers.com forum: To reply or not reply?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they are abusive report them. And be happy you didn't waste any time chatting to them.

Women and couples get stupid amounts of messages. It's impossible to reply to them all as more keep coming in. If they don't reply they're not interested.

Good luck.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I'd remove your update about not being replied to - it will deter people from communication with you, even more.

The fab guide is for no reply to mean 'no thanks'. Put your sent messages behind you and then focus on other people.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Not to 200 messages! You volunteering to be someones pa cause I think most of us work already, ta!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I have 444 unread messages currently at half a minute per reply that would take 222 mins so almost 4 hours of my life I’d never get back!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure if agree with above about not mentioning that you don't get many replies. It seems like an honest thing to say. Sort of showing Yr not like those self promoting types trying to inflate thier ego's. Also often females have that nurturing instinct to feel empathy and try to make someone feel better.

OP Question though! When you say no replies, are these to messages that you've written individually? If so perhaps it's what you've written that needs tweeking x

Good luck anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Oh right. Yeah do the maths. 200 messages, every one of them replies to "no thanks" asking but whyyyy not?? Some reply again asking why no reply to his whyyyy not question. More messages from new men coming in. Some vile wank fantasies. Some one word messages. More messages coming in. Some abuse. More messages coming in. More messages from men who haven't read the profile. Send more replies. More messages coming in.

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

It isn’t ignorance. The rules state no reply = no thanks. So technically that’s your reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

One problem women often face is that when they reply to a message to say they aren't interested, they then get messages asking why not or more commonly get unpleasant abusive replies.

They aren't expecting a message from you. Think of it as junk mail. You get plenty and might have a glance at something that seems of interest, but most of the time it goes in the bin. Would you write to the companies to explain that you aren't interested, because that's what you are expecting women to do.

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By *iberatedduoCouple
over a year ago

Ashbourne

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Yes, but if you have over 20 odd messages in your inbox daily we’re not going to spend 15 minutes replying to just to say no thanks. If folk don’t get a reply it’s safe to assume the recipient isn’t interested so it’s better to move on.

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By *ootprints1629Couple
over a year ago

somewhere in moray

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Sorry if this sounds blunt but you are only one guy who has msgd out of hundreds, ask yourself this..if you had let's say over 200 to 300 or more would you have time to reply to every single one of them? That "30" seconds adds up when you have far to many. No reply means no thankyou. It's in the rules.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."

I know there’s a general convention on Fab that no reply means not interested….however like you, we feel that just not replying is rude haha. Maybe we are just old fashioned. I do most of the messaging on our profile, although J (Mr) reads everything…and you’re right, it takes two seconds to reply with ‘you’re not for us, thanks’

F (Mrs)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well this is my point and glad you agree. Perhaps I’m expecting too much but we are what we are. Thanks for reply

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

If I ever get 200 messages I’ll let you know lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you all for the feedback and understand all of it now. Perhaps if I had 200 messages then I may not have posted it.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

OP Why haven't you replied to each comment on this forum ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Let's say you've sent 15 messages a day for a month. You've now received 45 "no thank you" messages.

How do you feel with an inbox full of rejection?

You now have to write 45 "thanks for the no thanks" messages. Because as you say, it's ignorant not to reply.

Do you buy from every company that sends you junk mail?

Do you send a polite "no thank you" letter to every piece of junk mail that comes through your letter box?

Winston

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd remove your update about not being replied to - it will deter people from communication with you, even more.

The fab guide is for no reply to mean 'no thanks'. Put your sent messages behind you and then focus on other people. "

Yeah the reply part seems a bit entitled

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

You've said this but not replied to everyone who has responded to your post. So according to your logic you are ignorant as well?

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."

Your latest pic is your cock, many Ladies and couples will look no further than your pics and not reply. It will however appeal more to Men.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’ve only just seen the message as I don’t get notification that anyone has posted a reply

So not being ignorant

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By *s.KerryTV/TS
over a year ago

Blackpool

Wouldn't you come back and check a thread you'd started though?

I think members are referring to the 'reply and quote' button so members know who you are replying too..

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I’ve only just seen the message as I don’t get notification that anyone has posted a reply

So not being ignorant "

Now you have had 22 minutes to reply to all the posts but you haven't !

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

People who don’t read the site rules then complain are mine

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

I totally agree with all of the above. I’ve often responded with a ‘Thanks, not my type’ only to get a response that is rude in return saying I’m ugly, fat, etc or asking why they aren’t my type.

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I totally agree with all of the above. I’ve often responded with a ‘Thanks, not my type’ only to get a response that is rude in return saying I’m ugly, fat, etc or asking why they aren’t my type.

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person. "

I had this just yesterday, a very respectful message from a good looking guy, but on reading his profile I thought we probably wouldn't get on. So stated thank you for the message but I don't really think we would be compatible. Which was followed by, "why not?" And "can you at least send me a face pic"

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person.

Which is why no reply is the best option. Too many don't take rejection well.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person.

Well I can understand not liking that

I’m not that pushy or disrespectful

If it’s a no I’m ok with that

It’s only when the message has been read and ignored.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the message

Yes you’re right in that score

I always reply to a direct message on my profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yes I can understand that

Wish I’d not posted this now lol

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

It’s only when the message has been read and ignored."

Like most of the messages to you on this thread ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

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By *he-DuchessWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

This 100%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply."

But surely you see the irony in complaining about not getting replies and then not replying to people on a thread you created asking for advice. If anything you’re more ignorant because you’ve asked for the advice.

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply."

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

And you have on been in here 2 weeks. Maybe your expectations are a bit high

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah, I’m not wasting hours of my life replying to men I’m not interested in thanks, who would? It’s not my job, I’m not an admin assistant being paid to reply to 1000 men with a “no thanks”

Then reply again to all the “why nots”.

Somebody hasn’t read the site t’s and c’s. Maybe that would take too much precious time.

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person.

Well I can understand not liking that

I’m not that pushy or disrespectful

If it’s a no I’m ok with that

It’s only when the message has been read and ignored."

You've done reply+quote here. People are trying to explain you've not done that to all the comments on this thread which wouldn't take long? Regarding messages, unfortunately no reply is a polite not interested and move on. Everybody needs a thick skin at times on here, and it's not easy for single Men due to their volume, you've got a hell of a lot of competition. You may well be one of the nicer guys on here, going to socials and clubs may help.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where’s my reply OP?

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

some men cant handle rejection then prob get abusive,,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I have 444 unread messages currently at half a minute per reply that would take 222 mins so almost 4 hours of my life I’d never get back! "

Exactly many can get 200 hundred a day easily way more if they update a status, add new photos etc)

200 messages to sort 1 by 1 at 30 seconds each (there is no bulk reply facility). That's 100 minutes of admin every single day OP.

Now god forbid you take a night off and 48 hrs later return to fab now you have 400+ messages. So you may as well forget family, raising kids etc cos once your home from your main 9-5 job you need to grab some food and start working on your 2nd job of replying to unsolicited fab messages until bed time.

Booked a weeks holiday aboard and won't be using fab for a week. That's ok once you return to 1000s you just need to book another week off work to catch up with your favourite admin.

Your looking at the situation through a single males inbox Up where you may get 1 or 2 messages a day.

Can is a site where men (especially since covid) out number women and couples 100 to 1. When a single woman joins now even with no photos will receive 200 messages in the first 2 hrs sadly many are crude, even abusive and they soon leave the site overwhelmed. Thus further worsening the male to female / couple ratio.

The single males who expect a reply and consider it rude without understanding the reality or bothering to read the sites FAQ that explain this further make the problem worse.

Imagine

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

You have been on here 2 weeks lol

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now"

Going to clubs isn’t convenient when you live the best part of 2 hours drive from your nearest though……

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now

Going to clubs isn’t convenient when you live the best part of 2 hours drive from your nearest though……

But you have been to clubs

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And you have on been in here 2 weeks. Maybe your expectations are a bit high"

May be I’m comparing to the site when last on

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now

Going to clubs isn’t convenient when you live the best part of 2 hours drive from your nearest though……

Newport isn’t far but agree it’s difficult

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now

Going to clubs isn’t convenient when you live the best part of 2 hours drive from your nearest though……

But you have been to clubs

Not yet I haven’t

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I have 444 unread messages currently at half a minute per reply that would take 222 mins so almost 4 hours of my life I’d never get back!

Exactly many can get 200 hundred a day easily way more if they update a status, add new photos etc)

200 messages to sort 1 by 1 at 30 seconds each (there is no bulk reply facility). That's 100 minutes of admin every single day OP.

Booked a weeks holiday aboard and won't be using fab for a week. That's ok once you return to 1000s you just need to book another week off work to catch up with your favourite admin.

Your looking at the situation through a single males inbox Up where you may get 1 or 2 messages a day.

The single males who expect a reply and consider it rude without understanding the reality or bothering to read the sites FAQ that explain this further make the problem worse.

Imagine

I agree with you

Was t meaning to open a can of worms tbh lol

Lesson learned

Appreciate the constructive comments not so much the critical ones lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now

Going to clubs isn’t convenient when you live the best part of 2 hours drive from your nearest though……

But you have been to clubs

Not yet I haven’t "

I was replying to _oiluvfun

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"And you have on been in here 2 weeks. Maybe your expectations are a bit high

May be I’m comparing to the site when last on"

A lot do but then quickly realise things have changed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you I may very well do

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."

As you’re a site supporter, use the private note function on profiles you’re interested in.

If you’ve messaged someone, and they delete your message within a short period of time, chances are they read your message, checked you out, and aren’t interested. Block and move on.

If you’ve messaged, but your message appears unread for ages, then disappears, chances are your message got lost in an avalanche, and the recipient did a bulk delete. Try again.

I find people are more likely to reply when they’re online.

You’ve only been here two weeks, be patient

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Where’s my reply OP? "

Here you go

I’ve been offline

Even with my superpowers I can’t see messages offline lol

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"I’ve been offline and don’t keep checking this page

But 22 minutes is nothing compared to a read message and days of no reply.

Unfortunately fab is different now from years ago. Men have saturated the site and hate to say it women have the pick of them. Going to clubs is your best bet now

Going to clubs isn’t convenient when you live the best part of 2 hours drive from your nearest though……

But you have been to clubs

I have, but won’t again as a single guy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where’s my reply OP?

Here you go

I’ve been offline

Even with my superpowers I can’t see messages offline lol "

Being offline does add to the workload. It certainly allows the fab admin of replying to every message to mount up.

Now you need to reply to everyone else on your thread, I mean, you don’t want to be seen as ignorant.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Where’s my reply OP?

Here you go

I’ve been offline

Even with my superpowers I can’t see messages offline lol

Being offline does add to the workload. It certainly allows the fab admin of replying to every message to mount up.

Now you need to reply to everyone else on your thread, I mean, you don’t want to be seen as ignorant.

I’m not ignorant but can’t reply to something I can’t see?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where’s my reply OP?

Here you go

I’ve been offline

Even with my superpowers I can’t see messages offline lol

Being offline does add to the workload. It certainly allows the fab admin of replying to every message to mount up.

Now you need to reply to everyone else on your thread, I mean, you don’t want to be seen as ignorant.

I’m not ignorant but can’t reply to something I can’t see?"

You can’t see everyone’s comments on this thread? Only mine? I feel like a VIP

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I’m not ignorant but can’t reply to something I can’t see?"

But now you are online you can go back through this thread and reply to all the posts

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

You can’t see everyone’s comments on this thread? Only mine? I feel like a VIP

Have you upgraded to platinum membership ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No gold supporter only

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am trying to get through them

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know me bad lol

Lesson learned

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"some men cant handle rejection then prob get abusive,, "

I’m ok with a no

Plus I don’t get abusive

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person.

Well I can understand not liking that

I’m not that pushy or disrespectful

If it’s a no I’m ok with that

It’s only when the message has been read and ignored.

Agree totally

Wish I’d never said anything lol

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By *reaming of pleasingMan
over a year ago

somewhere only we know

Majority of my messages go without reply, I don’t take it personally .

It’s no one’s right to expect a reply, if the other person is not interested then so be it.

As much as it can be disheartening not to get replies I get why women on here don’t reply due to some men not being able to take rejection and being abusive back.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No you’re not a VIP sorry lol

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

So - my profile says I won’t reply unless I have something to say, and left on read doesn’t mean I’m interested.

What I’m finding is that the majority of messages are just profile text - hey, I’m _elkie, 45, professional, nice tits, all my own hair and I love going down on. Woman for hours and hours. That kind of stuff.

Up to much?

OR How are you?

That’s not a conversation starter. That’s an invitation for me to start a conversation and I’ll end up doing all the work. Not interested. (And the last two will have requests for pics or phone calls within seven messages.)

You know that if I reply to your message, you will always be able to contact me unless I block you, right? I used to reply to everyone, got burnt out, tried to filter messages from single men out and it was still overwhelming. So it’s not ignorance. It’s looking after myself, rather than other people.

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By *orkcoastguyMan
over a year ago

Bridlington.

I avoid the matter of couples & women not replying to my messages by the simple process of not messaging them.

I leave it to them to contact me if they are interested in what I offer.

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By *ittle MonkeysCouple
over a year ago

Kimberley

We received a simple message saying “can I come round tonight and meet”

We sent a simple reply saying that we are not meeting at home at the moment and only on clubs.

We then received a barrage of abuse that we were liars and why can’t he come round. He quoted our verifications that we had had people to our house previously and that we were disgusting liars saying we only playing clubs at the moment.

This is why sometimes we simply choose not to reply. Firstly we get too many messages anyway and secondly most messages are from single guys thinking we are there to provide a service them.

To be honest it’s really tempting to just exit this site for this reason but it does hold some value for us so we don’t really want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I avoid the matter of couples & women not replying to my messages by the simple process of not messaging them.

I leave it to them to contact me if they are interested in what I offer."

An outstanding idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can’t see everyone’s comments on this thread? Only mine? I feel like a VIP

Have you upgraded to platinum membership ?"

I’ve got the fridge magnet and everything

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

"some men cant handle rejection then prob get abusive,,

I’m ok with a no

Plus I don’t get abusive "

The person you have messaged doesn't know that though, and plenty of people are abusive on here so maybe they would prefer not to take the risk in replying when they aren't interested.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I avoid the matter of couples & women not replying to my messages by the simple process of not messaging them.

I leave it to them to contact me if they are interested in what I offer."

Yes I think that’s what I’ll do but I doubt affect this thread I will get any messages lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

How about reply "sorry, not for me", send, block.

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

How about reply "sorry, not for me", send, block. "

What, so guys can start a forum thread about how mean we are for blocking them, aswell?! Or they start a new profile and message again with a different approach, over and over until you have to report them? Plus, it would still take up too much time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

How about reply "sorry, not for me", send, block.

I would t do that but have heard some do

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By *ackandtheunicornCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

It simply isn't worth it. Replying when you're not I interested just leads to more messages and more work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would it make to feel better to have an inbox full of “no thanks” OP?

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I’ve got the fridge magnet and everything

Do you subtly point at it when tradesmen are doing a job in your kitchen ?

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By *torm in a G cupWoman
over a year ago

Land of the Long White Cloud

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I used to reply with polite 'no thank you' messages, but found lots of guys not happy to leave it at that and who would continue to message me.

It is easier to just not reply and not risk the fallout.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

I don’t owe anyone a reply. And as pointed out about, it’s rarely worth it anyway.

If you read the FAQ’s on here it’s common knowledge a no reply is a polite no thanks.

It you presume that’s because the women are ignorant maybe find a site that’s better suited

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

OP; I would imagine the Fabguys site will give you more satisfaction, and certainly very few unread/unanswered messages

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

How about reply "sorry, not for me", send, block.

I would t do that but have heard some do"

But we don't know who will and who won't, so ya know

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

Well I can understand not liking that

I’m not that pushy or disrespectful

If it’s a no I’m ok with that

It’s only when the message has been read and ignored."

OP, if a message has been read, it hasn’t been ignored…

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

OP, if a message has been read, it hasn’t been ignored… "

Good point

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

No reply IS a reply. Youre not owed a response and it's not ignorant to not respond to your unsolicited message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone is not cup of tea

I don't reply

WHY ?

Cos it follows with passive aggressive massage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

How about reply "sorry, not for me", send, block.

I would t do that but have heard some do

But we don't know who will and who won't, so ya know "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well this is my point and glad you agree. Perhaps I’m expecting too much but we are what we are. Thanks for reply "

I will say though, I do quite enjoy chatting to people, while J (Mr) is quite quiet on here, and have actually ended up having some fun conversations with people who were initially a “no thanks”…even though it’s not gone anywhere. Sometimes it is just nice to have a connection no matter how small with like minded people, even if just for a fleeting moment

F (Mrs)

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By *IG G77Man
over a year ago

GATLEY

Yeah it's the world of fab it's hard to get replys on here inboxs are full and also post covid

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By *ittle MonkeysCouple
over a year ago

Kimberley

Another thing to remember is to carefully read their profile.

We specifically ask for face pics for a reply and ask that guys don’t send dick pics. But they hardly read that far and send messages in contradiction to what we have asked.

Believe it or not but one guy got abusive last week with us because we didn’t reply. Eventually I cracked and replied and said you didn’t send a picture that we asked for and he stepped up a gear. Apparently we have no right to ask for a picture and he definitely will not comply with requests like that. But he still expected us to meet him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Another thing to remember is to carefully read their profile.

We specifically ask for face pics for a reply and ask that guys don’t send dick pics. But they hardly read that far and send messages in contradiction to what we have asked.

I am maybe really naive, but I am genuinely shocked that people think it’s ok to behave like that, the sense of entitlement is astounding

F (Mrs)

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By *ohnandJulieCouple
over a year ago

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."

No reply means not interested.

So you are not getting ignored. There is a clear message when you are not receiving a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the very top of my profile it says “no photos or videos please”. I also ask again within my bio.

9/10 opening messages have either a dick pic or a wanking video attached.

Do these messages deserve a reply? Deserve my time?

No.

Would you go up to someone in a pub and whap your cock out? I hope not. So why do it here?

I despair.,

Sometimes I do reply and just write “eugh, ffs”.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At the very top of my profile it says “no photos or videos please”. I also ask again within my bio.

9/10 opening messages have either a dick pic or a wanking video attached.

Do these messages deserve a reply? Deserve my time?

No.

Would you go up to someone in a pub and whap your cock out? I hope not. So why do it here?

I despair.,

Sometimes I do reply and just write “eugh, ffs”."

Wait? Is that not how you introduce yourself to people on a night out? I’ve been doing it wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At the very top of my profile it says “no photos or videos please”. I also ask again within my bio.

9/10 opening messages have either a dick pic or a wanking video attached.

Do these messages deserve a reply? Deserve my time?

No.

Would you go up to someone in a pub and whap your cock out? I hope not. So why do it here?

I despair.,

Sometimes I do reply and just write “eugh, ffs”.

Wait? Is that not how you introduce yourself to people on a night out? I’ve been doing it wrong

I do sometimes rub my flaps on the end of their nose instead of a handshake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Quite honestly I’m not here to be slagged off just because I’ve turned someone down.

Try and go to a club or a social event and meet up with people. It’s much easier when they can see you in person.

Well I can understand not liking that

I’m not that pushy or disrespectful

If it’s a no I’m ok with that

It’s only when the message has been read and ignored.

Agree totally

Wish I’d never said anything lol"

To be fair it's a lesson learned and you took it well which is a big plus for you buddy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At the very top of my profile it says “no photos or videos please”. I also ask again within my bio.

9/10 opening messages have either a dick pic or a wanking video attached.

Do these messages deserve a reply? Deserve my time?

No.

Would you go up to someone in a pub and whap your cock out? I hope not. So why do it here?

I despair.,

Sometimes I do reply and just write “eugh, ffs”.

Wait? Is that not how you introduce yourself to people on a night out? I’ve been doing it wrong

I do sometimes rub my flaps on the end of their nose instead of a handshake

They must love you in your local

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I get use to it start talking cam chat or even nothing. Ladies on here get so many messages I do know how they deal with it. I just put it down to I am overweight ugly and and average size cock. Not a massive cock may one day someone will take me as I am. No good worrying about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Ignorant women, how dare they not reply.

"
this exactly

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"At the very top of my profile it says “no photos or videos please”. I also ask again within my bio.

9/10 opening messages have either a dick pic or a wanking video attached.

Do these messages deserve a reply? Deserve my time?

No.

Would you go up to someone in a pub and whap your cock out? I hope not. So why do it here?

I despair.,

Sometimes I do reply and just write “eugh, ffs”.

Wait? Is that not how you introduce yourself to people on a night out? I’ve been doing it wrong

I do sometimes rub my flaps on the end of their nose instead of a handshake

That must take some gymnastic ability…..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it’s ironic that you now have 200 messages on this thread explaining exactly what you should have already realised.

No reply is an answer.

woman get thousands of messages here and men not so much.

Not replying is the safest option for someone who doesn’t want or expect abuse from a random internet stranger.

suck it up and change your tactics and outlook for what you are expecting from being on here.

and as always happy fabbing!

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By *uvtocum501Couple
over a year ago

Windsor

So many messages are just cut and paste . If there is no reference to us personally, just one liners or poor grammar we cull and move on. We appreciate it’s difficult for you single guys but there are a lot of you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well this is my point and glad you agree. Perhaps I’m expecting too much but we are what we are. Thanks for reply "

Personally I always try to reply to everyone even if its with a simple no thanks or not interested

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By *moothCriminal_xMan
over a year ago

Redditch

I understand women are inundated but also understand when youve followed all the profile advice and written something witty it is galling to have no idea if you have been forgotten about or simply unsuccessful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

It isn’t ignorance. The rules state no reply = no thanks. So technically that’s your reply."

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

It’s not ignorant not to reply. Demanding a reply is toxic entitled behaviour.

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By *alpMan
over a year ago

Armitage

[Removed by poster at 30/07/22 23:07:26]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Whereas I appreciate all the replies even the negative ones I’ve taken the comments on board ok

So I think we can end the thread now

Yes I’ve not replied to every one (ironic eh) but they’re not introductory messages. FAQs here I come

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By *uy4swingingMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

[Removed by poster at 31/07/22 07:39:25]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whereas I appreciate all the replies even the negative ones I’ve taken the comments on board ok

So I think we can end the thread now

Yes I’ve not replied to every one (ironic eh) but they’re not introductory messages. FAQs here I come "
but why haven't you replied to everyone? they've taken time to give you valid advice ..you should make the time to reply

LOL

good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

Yesterday alone I received nearly 100 messages. I physically couldn't reply to them all especially if they had taken the time to read my profile they would realise it was a pointless message. Also every time I say no thanks to someone I either get abuse or they try and convince me to change my mind. It's definitely not ignorance.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I’d never be abusive even though I’ve had some to a polite message

Not my way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I’d never be abusive even though I’ve had some to a polite message

Not my way "

I didn't say you had.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

If you want a reply then I suggest that you should upload at least ten different photos of your penis and write a very sparse profile bio describing yourself as a popular national television channel.

This will secure you lots more replies than a well thought out profile that shows that there’s a bit more more about you than the ability to think with your cock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

If you want a reply then I suggest that you should upload at least ten different photos of your penis and write a very sparse profile bio describing yourself as a popular national television channel.

This will secure you lots more replies than a well thought out profile that shows that there’s a bit more more about you than the ability to think with your cock. "

Oooh the bitterness lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 31/07/22 10:22:25]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one owes anyone a response OP and no one is entitled to one.

Pxx

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By *agnum777Man
over a year ago

newcastle

awesome

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By *agnum777Man
over a year ago

newcastle

I think that escalated quickly .. I totally get your initial comment and I had the same opinion when I joined . When I realised the ratios and read bios I understood the no reply rule more so. I must admit I have occasionally sent a second message just in case my first slipped through the net

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think that escalated quickly .. I totally get your initial comment and I had the same opinion when I joined . When I realised the ratios and read bios I understood the no reply rule more so. I must admit I have occasionally sent a second message just in case my first slipped through the net

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here . "

I've been told I rate myself highly and really think I'm something because I've not replied to a message. That's a tame response.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here .

I've been told I rate myself highly and really think I'm something because I've not replied to a message. That's a tame response. "

Same here! I’m up myself (this seems to be the go to when guys don’t get the result that they want) and who do I think I am because I haven’t replied.

If you don’t want to immediately fuck every randomer in your inbox - you’re up yourself! It’s super immature and actually makes me laugh.

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I have 444 unread messages currently at half a minute per reply that would take 222 mins so almost 4 hours of my life I’d never get back! "

But how much pleasure would you get from knowing you helped make joy to somebody because you replied even if it was a no thanx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I have 444 unread messages currently at half a minute per reply that would take 222 mins so almost 4 hours of my life I’d never get back!

But how much pleasure would you get from knowing you helped make joy to somebody because you replied even if it was a no thanx"

I’m here for my own pleasure. I’m not going to spend hours replying to guys I’m not interested in to make them happy.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

My answer to this question is always the same - read the FAQs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."
only yesterday I was asked for a face pic but having sent one not even a yes or no. I find that so rude.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

We reply to some but not to others.

If someone asks us a genuine question about clubs in our area or Cap d'Agde or needs some information then yes we always reply. Sometimes at length. You would be surprised how many times we don't even get a thank you.

If someone sends a message to say they are visiting our area and fancy meeting in a club, we will reply.

However. One liners from people who obviously haven't got past the first line of our profile will be ignored.

"Hey" will be ignored. "What are you looking for" will be ignored (It's all in the profile READ IT!) "Who's near says you are 5kms fro me in Tenerife" Will either be ignored or or replied to with a READ THE PROFILE. It's all in the 1st paragraph.

To be honest some say that it is ignorant not to reply. I say it is equally ignorant to send out messages when you have either not read, or chose to ignore the profile.

Cuts both ways guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to reply. But after some guy pretty much told me that us women have to understand that all the rejection makes them snap and eventually send abuse to us, and thay women should be more considerate. I stopped. Men dont like rejection

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

They are not ignorant, just not interested in you. At all. If they were, they would definitely reply!

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By *enLucyCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."

Our profile blocks single guys, because we are a couple and meet couples.

Is there a chance that the site still lets single profiles send messages to people with those preferences, but just doesn't notify or show the message to the intended recipients? So it appears to have been ignored, when it's never been seen..?

Also, though, for those members who have 200+ messages ramming their inbox; I'd probably delete all, and just approach people myself.

Check to see of your message has been read in the Sent section, too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes most messages get deleted so frustrating. No matter how you word things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/08/22 12:54:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I have 444 unread messages currently at half a minute per reply that would take 222 mins so almost 4 hours of my life I’d never get back!

But how much pleasure would you get from knowing you helped make joy to somebody because you replied even if it was a no thanx

I’m here for my own pleasure. I’m not going to spend hours replying to guys I’m not interested in to make them happy."
took the words right out of my mouth , again the forums are the best filters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/08/22 14:51:29]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I bulk deleted 1400 messages last night.

It’s not ignorant to use my time as I wish on here.

I don’t have this account to please other people (unless I choose), I do it for myself.

The majority of messages are from men who clearly haven’t read my bio either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here .

I've been told I rate myself highly and really think I'm something because I've not replied to a message. That's a tame response.

Same here! I’m up myself (this seems to be the go to when guys don’t get the result that they want) and who do I think I am because I haven’t replied.

If you don’t want to immediately fuck every randomer in your inbox - you’re up yourself! It’s super immature and actually makes me laugh. "

Would they rather no thanks I don't find you attractive? I find that harsher

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone else finding it hard to even get a reply let alone a meet?

I’m always respectful and can accept not being someone’s cup of tea but to ignore or be abusive is not how I remember this site.

Any pointers or help with my profile etc will be appreciated."

Story of my life on here !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here .

I've been told I rate myself highly and really think I'm something because I've not replied to a message. That's a tame response.

Same here! I’m up myself (this seems to be the go to when guys don’t get the result that they want) and who do I think I am because I haven’t replied.

If you don’t want to immediately fuck every randomer in your inbox - you’re up yourself! It’s super immature and actually makes me laugh.

Would they rather no thanks I don't find you attractive? I find that harsher"

A lot of men on here say yes, they’d prefer a no thanks, I don’t find you attractive but I honestly don’t know how that would be better for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here .

I've been told I rate myself highly and really think I'm something because I've not replied to a message. That's a tame response.

Same here! I’m up myself (this seems to be the go to when guys don’t get the result that they want) and who do I think I am because I haven’t replied.

If you don’t want to immediately fuck every randomer in your inbox - you’re up yourself! It’s super immature and actually makes me laugh.

Would they rather no thanks I don't find you attractive? I find that harsher

A lot of men on here say yes, they’d prefer a no thanks, I don’t find you attractive but I honestly don’t know how that would be better for them. "

It's because by replying they have now bypassed all your filters and future filters (the only way is to block them fully) so for some that's half a foot in the door and preferable to no response.

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By *iking_WitchWoman
over a year ago

Hinckley

"Thank you and I do appreciate they get lots but it takes 30 seconds to reply

Ignorant people are pet hate of mine

I think you underestimate how many messages women and couples get in general and those in busy areas or that just happen to be absolutely gorgeous get even more.

No response is a response and the site very handily gives you a warning if you send messages to people who haven't responded.

Unfortunately some people take a polite response back as an invite to engage further. Only today I've had three men quiz me on "what are they doing wrong?", "why are they not good enough for a meet?" Jeezuz I can barely manage my own neurotic behaviours let alone strangers on the Internet I'm not attracted to!

Tips from a woman in getting more responses/meets:

Have a good bio

Have photos of your body not just your erection

Include a face pic

Talk about stuff that isn't sex

Encourage a quick public social

Remember who you've messaged/had sex with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

…. always polite and respectful , don’t understand why anyone would become abusive on here .

I've been told I rate myself highly and really think I'm something because I've not replied to a message. That's a tame response.

Same here! I’m up myself (this seems to be the go to when guys don’t get the result that they want) and who do I think I am because I haven’t replied.

If you don’t want to immediately fuck every randomer in your inbox - you’re up yourself! It’s super immature and actually makes me laugh.

Would they rather no thanks I don't find you attractive? I find that harsher

A lot of men on here say yes, they’d prefer a no thanks, I don’t find you attractive but I honestly don’t know how that would be better for them.

It's because by replying they have now bypassed all your filters and future filters (the only way is to block them fully) so for some that's half a foot in the door and preferable to no response.

KJ"

Then they name and shame you on their status

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