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SERIOUS QUESTION: Are there any Male Domination course

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By *urious Button OP   Man
over a year ago

Kensington

Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Have you read Jay Wiseman’s SM101: A Realistic Introduction? If not, it’s a very good place to start before considering any ‘training’ in the subject.

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By *urious Button OP   Man
over a year ago

Kensington

Thank you. Wry much appreciate your comments and recommendations.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Go to a Fetish club or munch and get to know some of the people on the scene. It’s friendly than you’d imagine.

Google ‘fetish munch’ and see what’s in your area.

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By *ouble_The_DelightCouple
over a year ago

Wakefield

As the above poster mentioned, go along to a fetish event or a munch and have a chat with people there, observe how they play and interact with others it's not something that can really be taught but you will learn a lot of the right way to behave and learn along the way.

k

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By *aliceWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

Nice guys make good dominants. There's an inherent requirement for consideration, good communication, empathy and a considerable duty of care. Don't fall at the first hurdle by thinking being a dom=being nasty.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire


"Nice guys make good dominants. There's an inherent requirement for consideration, good communication, empathy and a considerable duty of care. Don't fall at the first hurdle by thinking being a dom=being nasty."

Absolutely agree I met a great guy who tied me up and some light spanking/ whipping. Very friendly put me at my ease and could turn off the dominance if or when required.

See it as an acting job, playing a part but always remember it’s not sexual for everyone. Ensure you know what the sub wants from the experience.

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By *etro manMan
over a year ago

manchester

Maybe you could try a swingers club or hotel meeting or plan one and possibly a few would join you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated. "

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated."

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal"

This is some pick-up artist, incel understanding of what dominance is. This is the kind of shit you want to avoid OP. Performative nonsense.

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)

As well as SM101 I can highly recommend:

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism - Philip Miller

The New Topping Book - Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy

The New Bottoming Book - Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)


"I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal"

'natural dominance' isn't a thing, being able to take control of a situation, a scene or a relationship is a skill that is learnt like any other skill.

And don't ever dismiss nerds, some of the best SM players I know are nerds, one of the reasons being they want to be the best, they want to excel so they study, practice and learn all they can.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

This is some pick-up artist, incel understanding of what dominance is. This is the kind of shit you want to avoid OP. Performative nonsense."

Let the OP read the comments and make his own mind up what he wants to and how he wishes to move forward. There’s no need for a debate on what a real Dom is, and there’s no need for insults like that on a forum……..oh ok , Especially from an unverified teenager who lives at home with his mum

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By *enninemarkMan
over a year ago

huddersfield/manchester


"Nice guys make good dominants. There's an inherent requirement for consideration, good communication, empathy and a considerable duty of care. Don't fall at the first hurdle by thinking being a dom=being nasty."

I think this is so right! A Dom should care deeply about his sub, his role is to satisfy the subs need for pain, domination and pleasure above his own (in my mind) After all, by their submission, it is actually the sub who is really in control!

Markx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

This is some pick-up artist, incel understanding of what dominance is. This is the kind of shit you want to avoid OP. Performative nonsense.

Let the OP read the comments and make his own mind up what he wants to and how he wishes to move forward. There’s no need for a debate on what a real Dom is, and there’s no need for insults like that on a forum……..oh ok , Especially from an unverified teenager who lives at home with his mum "

I'm just sharing my opinion because the OP openly asked for people's opinions. You quoted my opinion and I responded. Otherwise, I wouldn't have bothered with engaging whatever opinion you shared. Because I don't really care.

I disagreed with your opinion and your opinion alone. Never made it personal. If you want to do that, go ahead, I really could care less what you think of me.

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By *enninemarkMan
over a year ago

huddersfield/manchester

[Removed by poster at 01/04/22 06:07:34]

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

The best dom I've experienced is the nicest most considerate guy you will ever meet and knowing that he will never hurt me means we can nudge those boundaries and be free to explore

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By *inkyfilthymindMan
over a year ago

Heathrow / Berks

Being a nice person and dominant are complementary qualities in my experience.

Unless you create a safe space for a sub to explore, you are unlikely to bring her to explore and push the boundaries. As others have said, this also gives a sub confidence that the limits will be respected.

On the flip side, you need a bit of a dark streak to genuinely push boundaries or to explore some of extremes. But not every dominant is a sadist (that will make life boring)

When you start, It is useful to have a view about what kind of dominant do you want to be OP. What are your interests and what are things that you want to explore first? If your idea of dominance is purely sexual… may be you should have a rethink

The books mentioned by others and munch are good places to start. Check the forums on the famous fetish place too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nice guys make good dominants. There's an inherent requirement for consideration, good communication, empathy and a considerable duty of care. Don't fall at the first hurdle by thinking being a dom=being nasty."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal"

I'm a little bemused at the last sentence. What is the relevance of choosing makeup, clothes etc for a woman? Many Doms don't seek to have that level of control and I don't know anyone who would describe that as core to D/s.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To the OP, it might help if you think about learning about dominance rather than "being taught". I've lost track of inexperienced men who've asked me to teach them to be a Dom. As a female sub, it's such a turn off that a man isn't prepared to read, talk, think, attend events and learn about what it means to be dominant.

That's why forums and writing on sites such as Fet(ish) Life are important. That's why the kink community is important.

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By *inkyfilthymindMan
over a year ago

Heathrow / Berks


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

I'm a little bemused at the last sentence. What is the relevance of choosing makeup, clothes etc for a woman? Many Doms don't seek to have that level of control and I don't know anyone who would describe that as core to D/s."

May be it is a special baby sitting kink.

Joking aside, if you are in a live-in, lifestyle Ds, this is one of the extremes you could take to. So, the post is niche, but not unheard of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

I'm a little bemused at the last sentence. What is the relevance of choosing makeup, clothes etc for a woman? Many Doms don't seek to have that level of control and I don't know anyone who would describe that as core to D/s.

May be it is a special baby sitting kink.

Joking aside, if you are in a live-in, lifestyle Ds, this is one of the extremes you could take to. So, the post is niche, but not unheard of "

Yeah it's TPE in my opinion if the control is that level and that's the minority of D/s relationships and not what the OP is asking about. He's interested in role play, not 24/7 living the lifestyle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nice guys make good dominants. There's an inherent requirement for consideration, good communication, empathy and a considerable duty of care. Don't fall at the first hurdle by thinking being a dom=being nasty."

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

So. Dominance starts with your self control. I need to know that whoever’s topping me believes in themselves and can hold it together to create an environment that is safe for me to let go in.

Then you need to be a people nerd. Get inside people’s heads and understand them. Is that a good noise or a bad noise they’re making?

Get a decent understanding of how adrenaline works on the body. First aid is helpful too.

Then. There are four main types of dom. sadists, bossy bastards, daddy doms and pleasure givers. There’s often overlap too. You don’t have to do anything that challenges your view of yourself to be Dominant. You just have to be someone who accepts the control someone else has given to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So. Dominance starts with your self control. I need to know that whoever’s topping me believes in themselves and can hold it together to create an environment that is safe for me to let go in.

Then you need to be a people nerd. Get inside people’s heads and understand them. Is that a good noise or a bad noise they’re making?

Get a decent understanding of how adrenaline works on the body. First aid is helpful too.

Then. There are four main types of dom. sadists, bossy bastards, daddy doms and pleasure givers. There’s often overlap too. You don’t have to do anything that challenges your view of yourself to be Dominant. You just have to be someone who accepts the control someone else has given to them."

Bossy bastards

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

[Removed by poster at 01/04/22 09:06:15]

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Never think any question is stupid or silly, knowledge and learning is exciting.

I think it’s great you are looking to expand your mind, and in the right way.

There are lots of people claiming to have dominant experience but it takes time to learn this skill.

Good luck OP

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. My problem is I’m too much of a nice guy so it’s mental switch which I’m struggling with. I am prepared to pay or even buddy up with someone. I’m looking to be trained in the art of Male Domination. If some can help or point me in the right direct then it would be very much appreciated.

As a dominant guy who is also nice and caring inside and outside of the bedroom, I'm just gonna say this isn't something you can teach. Its either in you, or it isn't.

All that can come in persuing this is some kind of BS toxic masculinity crash course from a true asshole who has deluded himself into thinking he is some kind of "alpha".

Just be yourself and enjoy sex. Be natural and if its in you, it will come out. If it isn't, it won't. It's not that complicated.

I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

I'm a little bemused at the last sentence. What is the relevance of choosing makeup, clothes etc for a woman? Many Doms don't seek to have that level of control and I don't know anyone who would describe that as core to D/s.

May be it is a special baby sitting kink.

Joking aside, if you are in a live-in, lifestyle Ds, this is one of the extremes you could take to. So, the post is niche, but not unheard of "

Um, , no. I’ll often ask vanilla swinging partners to choose my lingerie for me. It’s a way of getting my submissive itch scratched in a very low stress manner. Same with people who order for me - or even place the order for me. These are little ways of showing respect for a partner who is a lifestyle submissive, even if they’re not your sub, and making them feel seen. Helping someone into their coat is something a friend of mine does a lot, and it comes across as caring and protective, not bossy.

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton


"I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

'natural dominance' isn't a thing, being able to take control of a situation, a scene or a relationship is a skill that is learnt like any other skill.

And don't ever dismiss nerds, some of the best SM players I know are nerds, one of the reasons being they want to be the best, they want to excel so they study, practice and learn all they can. "

We have to stop agreeing.

Why does the military have officer training, and businesses have manager training.

There are skills that can be learned to control a situation. However, it starts with having the desire to control a situation. Dominance can be light touch on the tiller to micro management depending on the relationship. This is because every sub, every relationship, and every scene is different. A one size fits all dominance only works in movies and books. The dominance has to be right for the submissive, and the submission has to be right for the Dom.

My own view is that any dominant who does not question their desires and assumes control as a right is potentially dangerous. However, some submissives respond to that stereotypical James Bond type of dominance, so it's horses for courses.

I would recommend two books. The first is Anton Fulmen's The Heart of Dominance: A Guide to Consensual Dominance. This is on Kindle and I found it helpful when I started.

The second is Dominik McMaster's Domly Dom Manual, it is hard copy only. I read it last year, it is a fun read and comprehensive.

Good Luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

'natural dominance' isn't a thing, being able to take control of a situation, a scene or a relationship is a skill that is learnt like any other skill.

And don't ever dismiss nerds, some of the best SM players I know are nerds, one of the reasons being they want to be the best, they want to excel so they study, practice and learn all they can.

We have to stop agreeing.

Why does the military have officer training, and businesses have manager training.

There are skills that can be learned to control a situation. However, it starts with having the desire to control a situation. Dominance can be light touch on the tiller to micro management depending on the relationship. This is because every sub, every relationship, and every scene is different. A one size fits all dominance only works in movies and books. The dominance has to be right for the submissive, and the submission has to be right for the Dom.

My own view is that any dominant who does not question their desires and assumes control as a right is potentially dangerous. However, some submissives respond to that stereotypical James Bond type of dominance, so it's horses for courses.

I would recommend two books. The first is Anton Fulmen's The Heart of Dominance: A Guide to Consensual Dominance. This is on Kindle and I found it helpful when I started.

The second is Dominik McMaster's Domly Dom Manual, it is hard copy only. I read it last year, it is a fun read and comprehensive.

Good Luck"

I don't much like the phrase "natural dominant" because it's often used by those who don't have any insight into themselves or D/s. But I definitely agree with you that a dominant needs to start with that need for control. Otherwise why does one want to be a dominant? Because their partner asked them to be, because they think they will get more sex? That's not genuine.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich


"Yes I know this may sound stupid or even odd but I want to get into Male Domination. "

Why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just adding weight and fleshing out some good points already made here:

- Being a "Dom" is a set of skills, not a single one, and different Dominants will lean on different things (generally, their strengths and interests). There's no "true Dom", just what works for the D and the s.

- Like everything, these skills can be taught and will develop with practice and use.

- It's super important you hold on to that root idea of caring for the submissive, because that will guide you as you re-work the branches of how you "care" in practice.

- But you need to re-work your understanding away from strict "rules" of conduct (e.g. "never hurt a woman") to a framework of consent.

I just want to add that a "Dom" is as susceptible to emotional manipulation as anyone else. Do not be coerced into acts you are not comfortable with; especially with casual meets. It takes time to re-orient yourself and not feel regret, or like you did something "wrong"; respect that, and expect people around you to as well.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

There is the mindset aspect and the technical aspect. If you naturally have the mindset cracked the technical side will come with time, experience and through learning (rope tutorials etc). After all (especially with work, modern life and kids) many don't have hours everyday to learn and practice. You don't need to be a rope master or have a huge toy box. As long as you create the right atmosphere, approach with the right mindset and be safe you can get great results from simple acts, words and instructions.

I'm with others on this master your mind set first. And it's nothing to do with being a nice guy. Plenty of absolutely lovely, beautiful, caring gentlemen are doms. Many are just very quiet, unassuming, self assured men. And as long as you are always safe just relax and have fun. Remember it should be enjoyable for all parties, if its not ask why are you doing it? And take easy on your self, you don't have to be super dom straight away. Just enjoy spending that time with your sub, exploring them and finding what works.

Mr

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton


"I think the opposite, they will become at best an unassertive nice guy trying to replicate some characteristics of natural dominance really badly.

This is what I’ve seen at munches , nerdy, insecure, clueless, awkward around women, , they are not dominant ,they wouldn’t have a clue how to choose a woman’s make up , clothes; underwear , order her meal

'natural dominance' isn't a thing, being able to take control of a situation, a scene or a relationship is a skill that is learnt like any other skill.

And don't ever dismiss nerds, some of the best SM players I know are nerds, one of the reasons being they want to be the best, they want to excel so they study, practice and learn all they can.

We have to stop agreeing.

Why does the military have officer training, and businesses have manager training.

There are skills that can be learned to control a situation. However, it starts with having the desire to control a situation. Dominance can be light touch on the tiller to micro management depending on the relationship. This is because every sub, every relationship, and every scene is different. A one size fits all dominance only works in movies and books. The dominance has to be right for the submissive, and the submission has to be right for the Dom.

My own view is that any dominant who does not question their desires and assumes control as a right is potentially dangerous. However, some submissives respond to that stereotypical James Bond type of dominance, so it's horses for courses.

I would recommend two books. The first is Anton Fulmen's The Heart of Dominance: A Guide to Consensual Dominance. This is on Kindle and I found it helpful when I started.

The second is Dominik McMaster's Domly Dom Manual, it is hard copy only. I read it last year, it is a fun read and comprehensive.

Good Luck"

If you don't want to read a book, or listen to a podcast the best primer on D/S is Stjepan Sejic's graphic novel "Sunstone"

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