FabSwingers.com forum: Should I stop classing myself as bi-curious?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I still class myself as bi-curious but a friend of mine said I shouldn't as I have already met with women and shouldn't be classing myself as curious any more.

I've met with a few women as part of couples meets or at a party and enjoyed their company but don't wish to meet women on their own and therefore wouldnt class myself as bisexual

Just wondered what everyone else thinks x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i would say its whatever you are comfortable with... for me personally, bi means you would have a relationship with a girl, being curious means you're just having fun.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i would say its whatever you are comfortable with... for me personally, bi means you would have a relationship with a girl, being curious means you're just having fun."

Totally agree. Mrs B loves girl on girl fun in the heated moment, but doesn't look at women in a sexual manner whilst in "normal mode" so whilst there's no "Not Bi but likes toplay with girls" option, curious is the closest to the mark

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i would say its whatever you are comfortable with... for me personally, bi means you would have a relationship with a girl, being curious means you're just having fun.

same here, a 'bi-friendly' option would be good

Red

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still class myself as bi-curious but a friend of mine said I shouldn't as I have already met with women and shouldn't be classing myself as curious any more.

I've met with a few women as part of couples meets or at a party and enjoyed their company but don't wish to meet women on their own and therefore wouldnt class myself as bisexual

Just wondered what everyone else thinks x"

I feel exactly the same way as you!

If there was a 'bi playful with limits and in the right company' option - I'd tick that - but there isn't!

So I choose curious - and explain in more detail in my profile!

You are who you are and should be entitled to opt for whichever status you feel most appropriate - not anyone else!

Good luck!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"i would say its whatever you are comfortable with... for me personally, bi means you would have a relationship with a girl, being curious means you're just having fun."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I agree with you all, a bi-friendly option would be great. I'll just have to explain myself in profile I suppose. Thanks x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"same here, a 'bi-friendly' option would be good Red"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alas there's no option for Het

exible .....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alas there's no option for Het

exible ....."

Feck !

I ment HETROFLEXIBLE

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

Bi-playful is how I think of myself. I'm unlikely to ever have a one-to-one relationship with a woman. (I've learned not to say never, lol). I've only had one-to-one sex with one woman and think it's unlikely that I'll ever have that sort of connection again, but I will play with women during group meets when the mood takes me and the woman is of the same mindset.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was wondering today if there are more bi curious females than males ... I know Fab is a somewhat small and biased cross section of the community but it seems women tend to be prone to "curiosity" than males. A case of curiosity killed the pussy perhaps .....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

Bi Playful is a great explanation and I agree should be an option on profiles x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bisexuality is not defined as someone who fancies and/or wants a relationship with the same sex. But someone who will willingly have sexual encounters with the same sex and enjoys it.

So if the OP has had a few encounters and happy to have more then she's out of curious and into full on bisex land.

It matters not if that you don't ever see a woman and think "I'd have a relationship with her". If you're in a club or meet situation and have sex of some description with women, willingly and its fun then you're bisexual.

End of.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ns2006Couple
over a year ago

milton keynes

"Bisexuality is not defined as someone who fancies and/or wants a relationship with the same sex. But someone who will willingly have sexual encounters with the same sex and enjoys it.......

End of."

Genuinely interested here ... is the above a fact or an opinion?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmm...The "End of" element makes on believe the author is confident of it being fact.

Then again I'm sure such blatant assumptions of the world being flat were stated with similar confidence in the day.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

Means you are sexually attracted to both sexes...

The OP has had fun with other women, doesn't mean she has a sexual attraction to them....

They really do need a "Bi-playful" option on here....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Recently changed mine to 'straight' as I definitely am not sexually attracted to women, even though I have played with a few before in the heat of the moment.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ornieandhotCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

I am definately Bi have known for years I am attracted to both men and women although all of my long term relationships have been with guys

D x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *coobyroo218Couple
over a year ago

Guernsey

J has Bi sexual on our profile as she feels she has gone past the Bi curious stage as playing with other women on our meets.

She is not fully BI as in wanting to play with women on her own or walking down the street and thinking women are good looking.

We always ask a woman if why what and when sort of thing when we chat as to their sexual orientation, Like J women have bi on their profile but are just past the curious stage. Thats fine with us, J has mentioned about meeting a real bi woman (as in fancying women away from the scene) Just to get the experience for real as opposed to a quick fumble or a lick and a kiss on a meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I still class myself as bi-curious but a friend of mine said I shouldn't as I have already met with women and shouldn't be classing myself as curious any more.

I've met with a few women as part of couples meets or at a party and enjoyed their company but don't wish to meet women on their own and therefore wouldnt class myself as bisexual

Just wondered what everyone else thinks x"

Call yourself what you like. Why be different to the other "straight" people on here with same sex experiences.

Enjoy!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My "end of" statement.

Yes I believe it's a fact.

If a man or woman:

A-willingly has sexual encounters with the same sex, (After going past an experimentation stage)

B-Enjoys said sexual encounters,

C-Either seeks out such encounters or is willing to indulge should they arise

D-still enjoys encounters with the opposite sex.

Then they are bisexual. As the word says. END OF.

A person who goes along with a same sex encounter only to please a partner is straight as they don't fulfil the above criteria. A guy who shuts his eyes and gets a bj from an unknown mouth, that turns out to be a guy, is straight. Guys/women love head, who knew?!

Guys who fuck tv's-Bisexual and kidding themselves if they say straight.

People are probably going to jump in now with the old sliding scale crap and "how very dare you label me". But labels are only bad if used negatively. And people are unwilling to label themselves bisexual when they clearly are because bisexuality is seen as a negative. Gay/straight are fine. Bisexuals are to be avoided at all costs. So in not labelling yourself as Bi you're doing more negative damage than me calling you Bi.

Discuss.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My "end of" statement.

Yes I believe it's a fact.

If a man or woman:

A-willingly has sexual encounters with the same sex, (After going past an experimentation stage)

B-Enjoys said sexual encounters,

C-Either seeks out such encounters or is willing to indulge should they arise

D-still enjoys encounters with the opposite sex.

Then they are bisexual. As the word says. END OF.

Guys who fuck tv's-Bisexual and kidding themselves if they say straight.

Discuss.

Oh no, it's the sexuality police again!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *usttooCouple
over a year ago

newbury

For us the label "bi or bi cur' is an aid in finding like minded people to play with, at this point its only the profile we have to go on before mailing etc. There are a lot of guys that put straight but then say they are bi, there seems to be more of a thing with the guys rather than the girls. Not sure bi friendly would cover this really.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bi playful in the right situation x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As soon as I came much heavier than with a woman I new I was bisexual lol, the big cock in my bum also had an effect

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"My "end of" statement.

Yes I believe it's a fact.

If a man or woman:

A-willingly has sexual encounters with the same sex, (After going past an experimentation stage)

B-Enjoys said sexual encounters,

C-Either seeks out such encounters or is willing to indulge should they arise

D-still enjoys encounters with the opposite sex.

Then they are bisexual. As the word says. END OF.

Guys who fuck tv's-Bisexual and kidding themselves if they say straight.

Discuss.

If I could be arsed, I could have written this: agree with you 100%!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *MFC PartiesWoman
over a year ago

Here, There & Everywhere

"My "end of" statement.

Yes I believe it's a fact.

If a man or woman:

A-willingly has sexual encounters with the same sex, (After going past an experimentation stage)

B-Enjoys said sexual encounters,

C-Either seeks out such encounters or is willing to indulge should they arise

D-still enjoys encounters with the opposite sex.

Then they are bisexual. As the word says. END OF.

Guys who fuck tv's-Bisexual and kidding themselves if they say straight.

Discuss.

I admire and respect your honesty

Funnily enough, the definition of curiousity is - Arousing interest because of novelty or strangeness ... discuss ...

As a fully bi lady and someone who is totally proud of my sexuality, i have my own personal 'bi' categories

Bi Curious - As far as i am concerned, you can only really be bi curious if you havent yet had a bi experience. I appreciate that some people like to try new sexual things 3/4 times to see if they really like / dont like something, but to be bi-curious for years!!?? ...

The decison made from those few initial encounters should ideally help you to determine if you are bi or you are not

Bi Selfish - The person who is happy to 'receive' but not happy to 'give'

Bi furious - Thats me, however it does not mean that i will pounce on every lady, in the same way as i will not pounce on every man!

I have never thought that by labelling myself bisexual, i am advertising the fact that i am looking to have a full on relationship with a lady

My sexuality is displaying my preferences - i like, appreciate and enjoy the company of both men AND ladies but i dont fancy everyone!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to seem militant but this subject really gets my back up.

Some guys say they're straight on profiles because a lot of couples and women won't meet bisexual men. And that's because homophobia is still rife. Some men still think you can't turn off the side of you that likes men, and will pounce on them. Some women hate the thought of men having sex together and think it makes you less alpha male. You can say "I'm not homophobic its just my preference" all you like. Your preference is a tiny bit homophobic as its based on preconceived ideas about people.

Some guys put straight when they meet people like me, TV's. Because we tend to go to town more on the sexy underwear and be a lot more like men's view of a whore in the bedroom then it allows them to block out the fact that they're fucking a guy. When I've had meetings with 'straight' men its always been very quick and biased heavily towards their pleasure. So that they have minimal contact with me in case they touch my dick and the illusion gets ruined for them. And once they've cum they go.

And its all because people don't know how to react to bisexuals, to someone who is happy and confident with both sexes. So as animals we do exactly what we always do with something we don't understand. We fear it, hate it or both. And in some cases persecute it.

This is why people don't like to admit they're Bi and come up with all these wonderful Orally-bi/bi-on-a-tuesday/bi with blondes alternatives, instead of just saying "I like sex with men AND women, so jump on".

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

"Sorry to seem militant but this subject really gets my back up.

Here we go again...

Yes each to their own and if all could be totally honest with themselves and everyone else it would be much better.

However... if our preference is not to

meet bi men how the hell can that be seen as homophobic ? We are here to have sexual fun by adding an extra male i to our fun.. however two men fucking or sucking each other.. turns me (Mrs off) if they want to do that fine i have not a problem with it.. but i dont want to play with them thats all.. if it turns me off there us no point in us meeting them. more than happy to drink have a laugh etc and a good night out with bi or gay men but wont play with them.

Why people keep posting threads like this is beyond me.. But when people are called homophobic for their personal preferences its not on.

My impression of homophobic is someone detesting bi or gay not people who just dont want to play with them.

Also i am afraid to say the bi or gays that we have encountered in messages etc on here have triec to push it and insisted that hubby would love he'll have to try it... now we have had a few like this and plenty of others that insist all men are at least bi if not gay... that attitude does not help all the sensible bi and gay men on here that will never dream of pushing their sexuality onto a straight person. now we wont enter into to chat with any. but thats the same as under 35 too many pushy idiots under 35 so we dont bother with them either.

Its not homophobic its just personal preferences that are also driven by pushy men with bad attitudes. if people respected other peoples personal opinions, personal preferences and boundaries and just because they wont meet certain people or sexuality doesnt mean they are racist. fattist. sexist etc.. seems its so easy for people to jump on that wagon on this site. maybe the people have tried bi's, tv/ts, coloured, asian, white etc and any other conceivable type and found the one or two types etc that gives them the best and most pleasure in which case they are not honophobic, rasist etc just getting as much pleasure out of their swinging time as they possibly can.

People should really drop the chips on their shoulders and leave each to their own.

I hate these but feel impelled to post when someone such as us who wont meet bi men is being called homophobic. We take great offence to that.. And our gay and bi friends (not fab) would likely disagree with us being homophobic.. infact a bloody briiliant night out can be had with bi or gay men an absolute scream..but thats as far as it goes.

Can we not stop throwing up the homophobic, rasist etc etc name calling

Lets face it we dont rant when mens profiles say no women bigger than size 10 or 12... Well womens average size is 16... but because they wont meet over 12 are they being fattist .. probably but thats their personal preference and completely up to them. do we ramt calling them names on the forum ... no.. we move on to the ones that do want to meet a size 16.. Thats what everyone needs to do.

If your not for them move onto the next one..

now after that novel i have to get back to work with a coffee lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't call anyone a name. I said that people who say they won't meet bisexuals for the reasons I stated above are a tiny bit homophobic. Which is correct. It depends on what you are basing your decision not to meet a person on. If in your case you won't meet bi men because the thought that they have had sex in the past with another man is a turn off, then why does

that thought have that effect? And is there possibly the tiny thought that "that's not right" at the back of your mind? Just worth considering.

Something else that's misunderstood on here is the word 'preference'. Which is odd as its used an awful lot.

For example, A person can prefer tea over coffee. It means they will drink coffee, but prefer to drink tea.

If a person never drinks coffee then that's just a choice.

And just so everyone knows. I CHOOSE not to meet men who have hairy bodies. And this is indeed a prejudice based on one thing. Saw a film with Ben Stiller where he's playing basketball and collides with a sweaty hairy man and has his face rubbed over his belly in slo-mo. I was nearly sick and worry that having sex with a hairy man will have same effect. There, that's my prejudice laid bare.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I agree with your posts further up the thread Jodie....for me you are either playing with people of the same sex or you are not.

One makes you straight, one makes you bi.

Too black and white for some but just my take on it.

The one thing I don't agree with is if couples not wanting to play with bi men makes them homophobic.

Even if people sat and thought" the thought of two men playing together turns me off" doesn't make it homphobic....it would be like someone saying they don't find sucking cock a turn on , it wouldn't make them suckaphobic

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I didn't call anyone a name. I said that people who say they won't meet bisexuals for the reasons I stated above are a tiny bit homophobic. Which is correct. It depends on what you are basing your decision not to meet a person on. If in your case you won't meet bi men because the thought that they have had sex in the past with another man is a turn off, then why does

that thought have that effect? And is there possibly the tiny thought that "that's not right" at the back of your mind? Just worth considering.

Something else that's misunderstood on here is the word 'preference'. Which is odd as its used an awful lot.

For example, A person can prefer tea over coffee. It means they will drink coffee, but prefer to drink tea.

If a person never drinks coffee then that's just a choice.

Whilst I agreed wholeheartedly with your initial post, this one I can't agree with.

Personally, on the rare occasion I watch porn it's gay, I love watching two men at it, the rougher the better.

When it comes to play time I don't play with bi men because I like the look of humiliation on a straight man's face during anal play. I don't get that with bi men and as this is for my hedonistic pleasure I don't play with them.

Doesn't mean I'm homophobic in the slightest. I daresay there are people with friends from all creeds, colours, sizes etc who they love to bits but don't find sexually attractive.

Doesn't mean there's any ism involved.

If they say don't like bi men because they are all pox ridden sexual deviants with cheesy cocks...then I'd agree with you!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Again, I didn't say EVERYONE who won't meet bisexuals is homophobic. Just the ones who won't based on the reasons I stated a few posts back.

You're clearly looking for a particular reaction from a straight guy who is getting fucked. A reaction you won't get from a guy who is used to it.

EVERYONE PLEASE READ WHAT I SAID CAREFULLY AS THERE WILL BE A TEST LATER!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Jodie the voice of reason

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should class yourself as how you feel about it, not what others say. Only you can decide for yourself.

Wolf

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I have had 1 on 1 sex with guys and groups over the years. I don't fancy men nor want a relationship with one. I don't watch gay porn.

I may have been curious, but that stage didn't last long

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That approach is a bit wishy washy though isn't it?

What would you say to someone who said "I'm still a virgin. Yes I've had many many sexual partners but until I find THE ONE, I don't consider my virginity gone."?

People who come up with all this orally-bi stuff are just afraid to come out and say what they are and are watering it down to make it more acceptable to the broader spectrum of people. Of course don't care what others say, but don't lie to yourself. What's the point of that?:O

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That approach is a bit wishy washy though isn't it?

What would you say to someone who said "I'm still a virgin. Yes I've had many many sexual partners but until I find THE ONE, I don't consider my virginity gone."?

you go girl x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Wishy washy?

It is my opinion of how I am bi sexual and no longer just curious

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was a reply to Wolf but you jumped in before I could post

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

that thought have that effect? And is there possibly the tiny thought that "that's not right" at the back of your mind? Just worth considering.

Something else that's misunderstood on here is the word 'preference'. Which is odd as its used an awful lot.

For example, A person can prefer tea over coffee. It means they will drink coffee, but prefer to drink tea.

If a person never drinks coffee then that's just a choice.

Okay you say you didn't call anyone a name you said it was homophobic not to want to meet bi men basically. No its not a tiny bit homophobic but it does not turn me on... thats the same as some not being turned on by sucking cok, others by being tied up etc. It turns me off the same as a cuckhold situtation would turn me off immediately.

And the fact that the ones we have spoken to on here have all yes ALL tried to push it on us and hubby mainly (obvisouly) and that's just not right you should not push anything on anyone esp when our profile has made it clear. And then there is the ones that say they don't care they just want whatever they can get men or women .. well with that attitude they are not coming anywhere near me anyway. If I was even a bit homophobic then I would not want to be anywhere near bi men at any point, I have no issue with them my sexual preference is not for bi men, two men together do turn me off, along with a few other things as stated and a few more but not many mind. Personally me playing with another woman doesn't do it for me either, happy to watch but not for me. It is my preference not to play with bi men at all. It is only personal preference that it doesn't happen. Preference does not just mean I would prefer not but will either I won't and that's that.Although you have said you are not calling anyone homophobic you are implying it in your question of the reason why it turns me off... but Cuckhold turns me off, sex with a meet in a hotel doesn't do it for me either reason for the hotel ... not exciting enough for me !! Just because it turns me off doesn't mean I have anything against people that do it or am even the tiniest bit phobic of anything... oh well apart from spiders big phobic on that part ... lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Was a reply to Wolf but you jumped in before I could post

I would jump in the queue to show you my post

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Again, I didn't say EVERYONE who won't meet bisexuals is homophobic. Just the ones who won't based on the reasons I stated a few posts back.

You're clearly looking for a particular reaction from a straight guy who is getting fucked. A reaction you won't get from a guy who is used to it.

EVERYONE PLEASE READ WHAT I SAID CAREFULLY AS THERE WILL BE A TEST LATER!

I would say what you describe is more sterotyping rather than homophobic.

Will come back for the test later

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What I said.

I said SOME people. Not ALL .

If you are turned off by the thought of meeting in a hotel or being cuckolded then that is a different train of thought an emotions than being turned of by someone because of what they have done sexually.

You never said why it turns you off? "Because it does" isn't an answer. I said why I'm turned off by hairy guys. The thought makes my skin crawl.

Don't want to put you on the spot so pm me if you like, I'll happily debate this til the cows come home.

I'm not saying you should meet bisexuals if you don't want to, as that's daft and no-one should expect you to.

But hypothetically: Youre both on a night out, meet a guy and its clear you're into each other, he asks you both back to his and you have a wonderful night. All boundaries are respected. Its great and you'd happily do it again. But after its over he reveals through conversation that he's bisexual. Would that then make the experience less good and stop you doing it again?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That approach is a bit wishy washy though isn't it?

No I think asking others for their opinion on their own choices is in effect, a frought thing.

What would you say to someone who said "I'm still a virgin. Yes I've had many many sexual partners but until I find THE ONE, I don't consider my virginity gone."?

I think you know the commonsense answer to that yourself.

Of course don't care what others say, but don't lie to yourself. What's the point of that?:O

That is precisely my point. The OP should be true to themself and go with their own feelings on their sexuality. Hardly 'wishy-washy', but more 'inwardly reasoned' and 'self determined'

Wolf

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I still class myself as bi-curious but a friend of mine said I shouldn't as I have already met with women and shouldn't be classing myself as curious any more.

I've met with a few women as part of couples meets or at a party and enjoyed their company but don't wish to meet women on their own and therefore wouldnt class myself as bisexual

Just wondered what everyone else thinks x

Call yourself what you like. Why be different to the other "straight" people on here with same sex experiences.

Enjoy!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread