Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
Back to forum list |
Back to Swinging Support and Advice |
Jump to newest |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? " What do you mean worth? | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers " The bouncer obviously realised that you had confused a club with the gym. Try again on another evening with shoes perhaps. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers The bouncer obviously realised that you had confused a club with the gym. Try again on another evening with shoes perhaps. " Who even wears shoes anymore | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers The bouncer obviously realised that you had confused a club with the gym. Try again on another evening with shoes perhaps. Who even wears shoes anymore " Those of us who never wear trainers! But back to the point, yes, absolutely, go on your own, what have you got to lose? | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers The bouncer obviously realised that you had confused a club with the gym. Try again on another evening with shoes perhaps. Who even wears shoes anymore " The people inside clubs do. You’ll have to take my word for it of course. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers The bouncer obviously realised that you had confused a club with the gym. Try again on another evening with shoes perhaps. Who even wears shoes anymore " Most adults wear shoes or boots in my experience Trainers are not acceptable in many work places, and a lot of clubs have a dress code. I would have no interest in anyone who clearly hadn't made an effort to look good. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers " It's always worth checking the dress code before setting off to save yourself disappointment. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers " You obviously didn’t check the dress code! | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? " If you mean go on your own as a single guy, it CAN be a good experience, but it does depend WHEN you go. Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers " Why would you not risk it? You got turned away for ignoring the dress code! OP definitely go to a club, I would recommend club play on a Saturday night or Cupid's on a Tuesday daytime | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I've been thinking about that too.. My question is do I need to get a membership to go to clubs? Or can I pay just for the night instead." Depends on the club. Some you need to pay a membership some you don’t. Some need you to put your name down as places limited | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? If you mean go on your own as a single guy, it CAN be a good experience, but it does depend WHEN you go. Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on " Don’t give false info. Single men are approached at clubs | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I've been thinking about that too.. My question is do I need to get a membership to go to clubs? Or can I pay just for the night instead. Depends on the club. Some you need to pay a membership some you don’t. Some need you to put your name down as places limited " Thanks, that's good to know. I'll check up with someone local about that. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Wouldn't risk it I turned up and the bouncer told me I couldn't go in in trainers Why would you not risk it? You got turned away for ignoring the dress code! OP definitely go to a club, I would recommend club play on a Saturday night or Cupid's on a Tuesday daytime" MOTD is what I'm thinking of for my first club visit, good to hear a recommendation | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? If you mean go on your own as a single guy, it CAN be a good experience, but it does depend WHEN you go. Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on " This is your experience of clubs, but not the case for the majority of people. I never approach couples and only ever approach single guys if they catch my eye and appear friendly. OP Go on your own, smile as people come in , don't sit in a corner looking glum and get chatting to folks around you. But don't expect people to come to you on your first visit as regulars aren't sure if you want to sit back and watch what goes on or want to get involved. So it's key to mingle a bit, maybe have a dance and a little walk through the club. You'll enjoy the evening so much more if you integrate, not isolate yourself. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? If you mean go on your own as a single guy, it CAN be a good experience, but it does depend WHEN you go. Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on Don’t give false info. Single men are approached at clubs" I only speak from my experiences of being a single guy in clubs | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? If you mean go on your own as a single guy, it CAN be a good experience, but it does depend WHEN you go. Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on Don’t give false info. Single men are approached at clubs I only speak from my experiences of being a single guy in clubs " You get out what you put in | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? If you mean go on your own as a single guy, it CAN be a good experience, but it does depend WHEN you go. Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on Don’t give false info. Single men are approached at clubs I only speak from my experiences of being a single guy in clubs You get out what you put in" I can't do much more than appear clean, presentable, smell nice, do my best to appear approachable, hope to catch someone's eye and return a smile, and avoid lingering around the playrooms. But if nobody returns the ball over the net, I'm soon going to get bored of practicing my serve.... | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Trainers are not acceptable in many work places, and a lot of clubs have a dress code. I would have no interest in anyone who clearly hadn't made an effort to look good." So you can turn up to a club wearing a pair of twenty quid Primark brogues and be seen as smart but if you’re wearing a pair of clean and highly fashionable “sneakers” you’ll be confused with someone that’s wearing some sweaty gym attire? Sorry but the only time I wore polished dress shoes was when was at school or going for my first job interview….. I certainly don’t wear knackerd out busted trainers either when going out. If I’m wearing a suit, collar and shoes then I’m either getting married or having to go to court! | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Trainers are not acceptable in many work places, and a lot of clubs have a dress code. I would have no interest in anyone who clearly hadn't made an effort to look good. So you can turn up to a club wearing a pair of twenty quid Primark brogues and be seen as smart but if you’re wearing a pair of clean and highly fashionable “sneakers” you’ll be confused with someone that’s wearing some sweaty gym attire? Sorry but the only time I wore polished dress shoes was when was at school or going for my first job interview….. I certainly don’t wear knackerd out busted trainers either when going out. If I’m wearing a suit, collar and shoes then I’m either getting married or having to go to court! " I tend to agree, our kids spend £100s on their trainers, particularly our son and always look clean and smart in them. I wonder if a muddy pair of loafers would get past the bouncers but a pristine pair of Nike trainers would get turned away. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself " This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club." I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Trainers are not acceptable in many work places, and a lot of clubs have a dress code. I would have no interest in anyone who clearly hadn't made an effort to look good. So you can turn up to a club wearing a pair of twenty quid Primark brogues and be seen as smart but if you’re wearing a pair of clean and highly fashionable “sneakers” you’ll be confused with someone that’s wearing some sweaty gym attire? Sorry but the only time I wore polished dress shoes was when was at school or going for my first job interview….. I certainly don’t wear knackerd out busted trainers either when going out. If I’m wearing a suit, collar and shoes then I’m either getting married or having to go to court! " Yeah but that's you, others will be different, some would turn up in anything if they could. Really It's irrelevant how much your trainers or clothes cost as the dress code usually isn't wear expensive clothes it's usually smart casual with shoes. You can look smart in a £40 outfit just as you can look like you've rolled out of bed in a £1000 outfit. Anyways the takeaway here is it's always best to check the entry requirements of the night, before you go to a place. The same club may have different dress codes on different days or events. It's not like it's extremely difficult to check or anything these days. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Trainers are not acceptable in many work places, and a lot of clubs have a dress code. I would have no interest in anyone who clearly hadn't made an effort to look good. So you can turn up to a club wearing a pair of twenty quid Primark brogues and be seen as smart but if you’re wearing a pair of clean and highly fashionable “sneakers” you’ll be confused with someone that’s wearing some sweaty gym attire? Sorry but the only time I wore polished dress shoes was when was at school or going for my first job interview….. I certainly don’t wear knackerd out busted trainers either when going out. If I’m wearing a suit, collar and shoes then I’m either getting married or having to go to court! Yeah but that's you, others will be different, some would turn up in anything if they could. Really It's irrelevant how much your trainers or clothes cost as the dress code usually isn't wear expensive clothes it's usually smart casual with shoes. You can look smart in a £40 outfit just as you can look like you've rolled out of bed in a £1000 outfit. Anyways the takeaway here is it's always best to check the entry requirements of the night, before you go to a place. The same club may have different dress codes on different days or events. It's not like it's extremely difficult to check or anything these days." I'll add these 'trainers' were guiseppe zanotti and not the garish ones with any bling just regular brown leather guiseppes pretty much brand new. They are definately not typical 'trainers' they look a lot more like shoes. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club." I always used to approach friendly looking men in clubs, sometimes not even for sex, sometimes just to chat! | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" I'll add these 'trainers' were guiseppe zanotti and not the garish ones with any bling just regular brown leather guiseppes pretty much brand new. They are definately not typical 'trainers' they look a lot more like shoes. " Ahhh but they’re still trainers | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Ahhh but they’re still trainers " Exactly, as soon as you start making it ambiguous with "smart trainers" or "clean trainers" then people will start arguing what "smart" or "clean" means. Much easier to just have a simple rule and enforce it. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on Don’t give false info. Single men are approached at clubs I only speak from my experiences of being a single guy in clubs " Sorry, I'm a little confused. You told OP not to go alone as you have visited several clubs as a single guy, then say you've only been to Club Play in Blackpool. It would have been easier to say don't go to club Play because no one liked me. I'm sensing sour grapes rather than advise to the OP. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Ahhh but they’re still trainers Exactly, as soon as you start making it ambiguous with "smart trainers" or "clean trainers" then people will start arguing what "smart" or "clean" means. Much easier to just have a simple rule and enforce it. " Absolutely I agree | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? " Can I ask why on the night you came in to club play, why didn't you approach people and ask to sit with them | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? Can I ask why on the night you came in to club play, why didn't you approach people and ask to sit with them " Because he thinks people should approach him and not the other way round. If you sit in a corner and don’t make any attempt to be social no wonder. Talk to people! | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Take my advice, as someone who has visited several clubs as a single guy; make your first visit to any club as a couple, or a friend of a couple. Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself, and really not ‘worth’ it I’ve only been to Club Play in Blackpool, feel free to message me direct to hear how I got on Don’t give false info. Single men are approached at clubs I only speak from my experiences of being a single guy in clubs Sorry, I'm a little confused. You told OP not to go alone as you have visited several clubs as a single guy, then say you've only been to Club Play in Blackpool. It would have been easier to say don't go to club Play because no one liked me. I'm sensing sour grapes rather than advise to the OP." Yep, I see how that reads now. The OP is from Blackpool, so naturally there’s a choice of two clubs on his doorstep, and what I meant was I’d only been to Club Play out of those two I’ve also been to Cupids, Townhouse, Club f, Atlantis, La Chambre, and No.3, as a single guy, so know how it feels. “Sour grapes”? Not exactly, but I did leave the club feeling rather flat | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? Can I ask why on the night you came in to club play, why didn't you approach people and ask to sit with them " I chatted with a couple of blokes at the bar, and a couple who had contacted me through Fab beforehand. Apart from that, it seemed a quiet night, and the rest of the people in there (mainly couples), were sticking in their groups, which I don’t find easy to approach. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Never understood the "smart shoes" only rule. I manage events at a high end Mayfair club (nothing to do with Swinging) and we use common sense, trainers like Balenciaga's or McQueens will get a pass if the overall outfit presents itself as smart. People in Vapormax's and Hoodies have even gotten in (just look at my profile picture) if its clear you're not straight out of the gym. Besides.. who the hell wants to be on their feet and dancing all night in dress shoes? I feel like a lot of venues just push a tricky dress code to make themselves seem classier and more high end than they actually are. " We’ve been saying this for years! The whole dress code rule is incredibly dated. We only went to a club once & felt we were in a time warp! It didn’t appeal to us | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Trainers are not acceptable in many work places, and a lot of clubs have a dress code. I would have no interest in anyone who clearly hadn't made an effort to look good. So you can turn up to a club wearing a pair of twenty quid Primark brogues and be seen as smart but if you’re wearing a pair of clean and highly fashionable “sneakers” you’ll be confused with someone that’s wearing some sweaty gym attire? Sorry but the only time I wore polished dress shoes was when was at school or going for my first job interview….. I certainly don’t wear knackerd out busted trainers either when going out. If I’m wearing a suit, collar and shoes then I’m either getting married or having to go to court! Yeah but that's you, others will be different, some would turn up in anything if they could. Really It's irrelevant how much your trainers or clothes cost as the dress code usually isn't wear expensive clothes it's usually smart casual with shoes. You can look smart in a £40 outfit just as you can look like you've rolled out of bed in a £1000 outfit. Anyways the takeaway here is it's always best to check the entry requirements of the night, before you go to a place. The same club may have different dress codes on different days or events. It's not like it's extremely difficult to check or anything these days. I'll add these 'trainers' were guiseppe zanotti and not the garish ones with any bling just regular brown leather guiseppes pretty much brand new. They are definately not typical 'trainers' they look a lot more like shoes. " What was the dress code for the club you went to? | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? Can I ask why on the night you came in to club play, why didn't you approach people and ask to sit with them Because he thinks people should approach him and not the other way round. If you sit in a corner and don’t make any attempt to be social no wonder. Talk to people!" Were you in on the night I was there? | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? " No I don’t because its not the club, it’s how you present yourself in the venue or at the event. If you are sat looking miserable or following people around as a towel zombie, your success will still be the same at all the clubs. (Which I’m not suggesting you do) but the point is it’s up to you how you carry yourself there. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? Can I ask why on the night you came in to club play, why didn't you approach people and ask to sit with them Because he thinks people should approach him and not the other way round. If you sit in a corner and don’t make any attempt to be social no wonder. Talk to people! Were you in on the night I was there?" Yes | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really want to attend a club for the first time is it worth going on your own ? " Go to any club to socialise, be it daytime or evening. Everything else you might participate in, is a bonus.... Just enjoy the escapism from your every day lifestyle. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Nobody approaches single guys in clubs, so it can be a very lonely impersonal place to be by yourself This is untrue Nobody has approached you, don’t you mean… Plenty of single men do very well in a club. I do feel like I wear Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak in clubs lol! Do you have any clubs/events you can recommend to visit as a solo guy? Can I ask why on the night you came in to club play, why didn't you approach people and ask to sit with them Because he thinks people should approach him and not the other way round. If you sit in a corner and don’t make any attempt to be social no wonder. Talk to people! Were you in on the night I was there?" I was | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Never understood the "smart shoes" only rule. I manage events at a high end Mayfair club (nothing to do with Swinging) and we use common sense, trainers like Balenciaga's or McQueens will get a pass if the overall outfit presents itself as smart. People in Vapormax's and Hoodies have even gotten in (just look at my profile picture) if its clear you're not straight out of the gym. Besides.. who the hell wants to be on their feet and dancing all night in dress shoes? I feel like a lot of venues just push a tricky dress code to make themselves seem classier and more high end than they actually are. " It's an absolutely crazy rule, most of these types of shoes look smart and are typical shoes 'trainers' you'd wear on nights out. I'd much rather people turned up to my club in Balenciagas than George at Asda shit flickers. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Never understood the "smart shoes" only rule. I manage events at a high end Mayfair club (nothing to do with Swinging) and we use common sense, trainers like Balenciaga's or McQueens will get a pass if the overall outfit presents itself as smart. People in Vapormax's and Hoodies have even gotten in (just look at my profile picture) if its clear you're not straight out of the gym. Besides.. who the hell wants to be on their feet and dancing all night in dress shoes? I feel like a lot of venues just push a tricky dress code to make themselves seem classier and more high end than they actually are. It's an absolutely crazy rule, most of these types of shoes look smart and are typical shoes 'trainers' you'd wear on nights out. I'd much rather people turned up to my club in Balenciagas than George at Asda shit flickers. " Well those are the rules | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Never understood the "smart shoes" only rule. I manage events at a high end Mayfair club (nothing to do with Swinging) and we use common sense, trainers like Balenciaga's or McQueens will get a pass if the overall outfit presents itself as smart. People in Vapormax's and Hoodies have even gotten in (just look at my profile picture) if its clear you're not straight out of the gym. Besides.. who the hell wants to be on their feet and dancing all night in dress shoes? I feel like a lot of venues just push a tricky dress code to make themselves seem classier and more high end than they actually are. It's an absolutely crazy rule, most of these types of shoes look smart and are typical shoes 'trainers' you'd wear on nights out. I'd much rather people turned up to my club in Balenciagas than George at Asda shit flickers. " the rule is there so you can show you made an effort to comply and are therefore the clientele their client base wish to attract. I only wear shoes to weddings/funerals and soon clubs. Therefore asda shit flickers will do me, also our budget dictates that we spend wisely. If i wanna do a dad dance then i’ll slip them off, no one’s gonna steal them steve | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Post new Message to Thread |
back to top |