FabSwingers.com forum: How to get conversation flowing…

By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Hello everyone,

Can someone please help me and direct me where I am going wrong? I have no idea how to engage in what people call “interesting” chat. I try and engage in different ways almost daily and constantly getting shot down….

Is it my profile? My pictures? Can someone please give me some advice.

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By *edheadsruleCouple
over a year ago

lancashire

Honestly? I wouldn't engage with your profile because of your pics I'm afraid, public toilet shots just don't do it for me

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

You have a Toilet brush in your profile pic......

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Thank you for the feedback and I will get rid of the picture in the toilet

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By *aliceWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

So you have 'must have good conversation' in your profile and are posting a thread asking how to start good conversation?

I'm afraid no-one can tell you how to be interesting, but your profile is poor. As previously said the pics are off putting, the profile is generic and vague and the 'can't accommodate due to job' is suss.

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By *oobyHotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Thurrock

I'd say you need a few new photos, no one likes a pic that includes a toilet & while I actually don't mind a cock pic the head of it doesn't really give much away about you

The bio basically reads like your here for easy sex & I think every guy will confirm you're on the wrong site for that, there's 100 guys for every female/couple so your profile needs to stand out, what can you offer that the other guys can't, what makes you the one we need to meet

Also many will sadly read can't accommodate as married

A club of a group social will be the best place to meet people & get noticed

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Would like to thank everyone for the genuine comments and feedback! I have taken on board what has been said and will try and implement them

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By *oelDorianMan
over a year ago

vanaheim

Yeah there is no formula you have have to let it flow naturally

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"Yeah there is no formula you have have to let it flow naturally "

Thanks man I will try!

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

"I'd say you need a few new photos, no one likes a pic that includes a toilet & while I actually don't mind a cock pic the head of it doesn't really give much away about you

Also many will sadly read can't accommodate as married

A club of a group social will be the best place to meet people & get noticed "

May I take up one point where you have made an assumption, ie, viewing the fact someone cannot accommodate means they are married.

Not so! I'm genuinely Single but career wise worked around the UK in Hotel Management.

That often meant being in Live-In accommodation supplied by the employers. It meant more often than not, no visitors in the accommodation supplied.

The same can apply to members of the Armed Forces, or within the Emergency Services such as Police or Nursing where accommodation can be supplied.

It's therefore wrong to assume it's a married guy playing behind the wife's back. Yes, it happens, but at least suggest to the OP he gives a reason why!

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"I'd say you need a few new photos, no one likes a pic that includes a toilet & while I actually don't mind a cock pic the head of it doesn't really give much away about you

Also many will sadly read can't accommodate as married

A club of a group social will be the best place to meet people & get noticed

May I take up one point where you have made an assumption, ie, viewing the fact someone cannot accommodate means they are married.

Not so! I'm genuinely Single but career wise worked around the UK in Hotel Management.

That often meant being in Live-In accommodation supplied by the employers. It meant more often than not, no visitors in the accommodation supplied.

The same can apply to members of the Armed Forces, or within the Emergency Services such as Police or Nursing where accommodation can be supplied.

It's therefore wrong to assume it's a married guy playing behind the wife's back. Yes, it happens, but at least suggest to the OP he gives a reason why!"

Very well made point there and it is because of work reasons that I can’t accommodate.

Thank you for you comment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The status would be the most off putting thing for me.

Your bio is a bit negative and you don’t sound very confident, and you need some more variety with your pics.

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"The status would be the most off putting thing for me.

Your bio is a bit negative and you don’t sound very confident, and you need some more variety with your pics. "

Ok thanks you for the feedback

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

"I'd say you need a few new photos, no one likes a pic that includes a toilet & while I actually don't mind a cock pic the head of it doesn't really give much away about you

Also many will sadly read can't accommodate as married

A club of a group social will be the best place to meet people & get noticed

May I take up one point where you have made an assumption, ie, viewing the fact someone cannot accommodate means they are married.

Not so! I'm genuinely Single but career wise worked around the UK in Hotel Management.

That often meant being in Live-In accommodation supplied by the employers. It meant more often than not, no visitors in the accommodation supplied.

The same can apply to members of the Armed Forces, or within the Emergency Services such as Police or Nursing where accommodation can be supplied.

It's therefore wrong to assume it's a married guy playing behind the wife's back. Yes, it happens, but at least suggest to the OP he gives a reason why!

Very well made point there and it is because of work reasons that I can’t accommodate.

Thank you for you comment

As a long term member on here though, take heed of the suggestions made already.

Ditch the Cock pic to Private, and replace with a Public Facial pic (if you can?)

Any negativity, eg, whining style comment etc in your profile, get rid of it, as it goes against you.

You've only been on here for a few months, just as the Country is emerging from a pandemic. Pre-Covid, it could take single Males a year to achieve success. Nowadays, it takes even longer.

But as you've said in your profile, you move around with your job. Thus by not being settled in one area, that too will go against you.

I found that too in my career, but it paid dividends once I had been established in any one place after 12 months.

As suggested, get to Socials or Clubs in your region as a starter point.

Good Luck

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"I'd say you need a few new photos, no one likes a pic that includes a toilet & while I actually don't mind a cock pic the head of it doesn't really give much away about you

Also many will sadly read can't accommodate as married

A club of a group social will be the best place to meet people & get noticed

May I take up one point where you have made an assumption, ie, viewing the fact someone cannot accommodate means they are married.

Not so! I'm genuinely Single but career wise worked around the UK in Hotel Management.

That often meant being in Live-In accommodation supplied by the employers. It meant more often than not, no visitors in the accommodation supplied.

The same can apply to members of the Armed Forces, or within the Emergency Services such as Police or Nursing where accommodation can be supplied.

It's therefore wrong to assume it's a married guy playing behind the wife's back. Yes, it happens, but at least suggest to the OP he gives a reason why!

Very well made point there and it is because of work reasons that I can’t accommodate.

Thank you for you comment

As a long term member on here though, take heed of the suggestions made already.

Ditch the Cock pic to Private, and replace with a Public Facial pic (if you can?)

Any negativity, eg, whining style comment etc in your profile, get rid of it, as it goes against you.

You've only been on here for a few months, just as the Country is emerging from a pandemic. Pre-Covid, it could take single Males a year to achieve success. Nowadays, it takes even longer.

But as you've said in your profile, you move around with your job. Thus by not being settled in one area, that too will go against you.

I found that too in my career, but it paid dividends once I had been established in any one place after 12 months.

As suggested, get to Socials or Clubs in your region as a starter point.

Good Luck"

Notes and thank you for the kind support!

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By *uicypeaches77Couple
over a year ago

Torquay

Go to the pub

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By *_yeahPartiesCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

I was also going to mention the negative slant, it’s more what you’re not or can’t do rather then what you are or can. Maybe just flip it around a bit

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

New photos would help. Also alter your age range as I'm sure you wouldn't really ne attracted to people in their teens and in their 90s.

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By *oobyHotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Thurrock

"I'd say you need a few new photos, no one likes a pic that includes a toilet & while I actually don't mind a cock pic the head of it doesn't really give much away about you

Also many will sadly read can't accommodate as married

A club of a group social will be the best place to meet people & get noticed

May I take up one point where you have made an assumption, ie, viewing the fact someone cannot accommodate means they are married.

Not so! I'm genuinely Single but career wise worked around the UK in Hotel Management.

That often meant being in Live-In accommodation supplied by the employers. It meant more often than not, no visitors in the accommodation supplied.

The same can apply to members of the Armed Forces, or within the Emergency Services such as Police or Nursing where accommodation can be supplied.

It's therefore wrong to assume it's a married guy playing behind the wife's back. Yes, it happens, but at least suggest to the OP he gives a reason why!"

I didn't make the assumption, I said many will sadly assume, there's literally hundreds of forum posts saying the same thing, I was simply pointing out its another barrier you'll likely face

The word sadly implied I was in your corner

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Op you say "I have no idea how to engage in what people call “interesting” chat."

DO you have no friends in real life?

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By *oelDorianMan
over a year ago

vanaheim

"Op you say "I have no idea how to engage in what people call “interesting” chat."

DO you have no friends in real life?"

This ^ like have you not had conversations with mates or family

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Op you say "I have no idea how to engage in what people call “interesting” chat."

DO you have no friends in real life?"

Yep! Just be yourself, OP. You can't force "interesting" chat - it's natural. Just like in real life, you'll click with some people, but not others.

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Op you say "I have no idea how to engage in what people call “interesting” chat."

DO you have no friends in real life?

Yep! Just be yourself, OP. You can't force "interesting" chat - it's natural. Just like in real life, you'll click with some people, but not others. "

And I'm not saying this as someone who has any magical answers; it's definitely a bit of a lottery, so didn't mean to come across rude. Good luck!

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By *inkyRedHead666 OP Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"Op you say "I have no idea how to engage in what people call “interesting” chat."

DO you have no friends in real life?

Yep! Just be yourself, OP. You can't force "interesting" chat - it's natural. Just like in real life, you'll click with some people, but not others.

And I'm not saying this as someone who has any magical answers; it's definitely a bit of a lottery, so didn't mean to come across rude. Good luck!"

Thanks for the feedback and not rude at all! Thanks mate

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By *ilf and old fartCouple
over a year ago

Between Ely and Mildenhall

Hello everyone,

Is it my profile? My pictures? Can someone please give me some advice.

This is a bit long but hopefully it will help.

You need to get a writing pad and sit down with a beer or two and work out a better bio. Once you have, then read through it a few times and see if it needs to be tweaked or is okay, then put it to one side and leave it for a while and have another beer (you wearing a stable belt and are aboard a ship, so your either are or were RM or RN so you do drink lol)

Then pick your bio up and read it as if you were a couple that is looking at your profile. Would it attract your interest or turn you off ? If you think that it's not right then alter it. If you feel that its okay then use that.

Regarding your photos, bin them, their gash. Dump the macho pose, it doesn't flatter at all and I doubt that the other lads would be happy to have their bunks in the photo. As for the mirror shot, that could be so much better with better lighting and being photo edited.

Get a better body shot by propping your phone on something and then using the timer on the camera to get lots of different shots. If you reverse the camera then you can see what the picture will look like and let you quickly get into position for each shot.

Then use the photo editor on the camera settings to crop your photos to reduce the background and rather than colour over your face, crop the picture to neckline thereby removing your face from the picture.

Take lots of photos at different times and locations, you don't have to be naked in every picture on your profile, but a good picture regardless of where it's taken can really help You can get a better cock shot as well as better body shots, just don't fill your profile with cock shots, take a few from different angles, that's all we need to see of your cock.

If, as I suspect, you are a serviceman, then just state that as a serviceman you can not accommodate. That stops the speculation about why you cannot accommodate. You don't have or need to say any more than that. Definitely do not use any uniform photos and don't send any in messages either. That could get you into a world of pain with NCO's, PO's and officers.

Good luck

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By *ootprints1629Couple
over a year ago

somewhere in moray

I don't think that fab will do you any favours if your struggling to approach people and not know how to speak to them, women and couples like a man that is confident in himself but not cocky with it and most profiles you read will say that persons who msg must be able to hold a conversation, you have to ask yourself what it is you want from fab as in could you handle being in certain situations where there are multiple people having sex in the same room and various other scenarios, because at the end of the day it's a swingers site and if you struggle to hold an interesting conversation then you will struggle in this life style...just my opinion and you don't have to agree.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

When chatting to couples ALWAYS address the bloke first. As they have fragile egos and are the ones you need to impress. This isn't a case of owner ship: more a case of "I'm a bloke and I know how one thinks"

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"When chatting to couples ALWAYS address the bloke first. As they have fragile egos and are the ones you need to impress. This isn't a case of owner ship: more a case of "I'm a bloke and I know how one thinks""

Spot on.

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

I presume you've made changes to your profile, best on what feedback you've received here, as it doesn't read too bad to me.

However, the 2nd photo would turn us both off. Yet, I'm sure some would love it.

Get known in the forums, maybe chat via cam and consider joining a club.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Hello everyone,

Is it my profile? My pictures? Can someone please give me some advice.

I'm struggling because you have put you work all over surely even via that you strike up a interesting conversation with others away from the site we're not animals on here just use the same courtesy

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By *angelifeMan
over a year ago

Guidepost

fjck knows mate, girls rule fab, rate my profile, your right, the whole "no shit craic?" just puts you off, one girls shit craic is anothers t0olstoy

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By *astesLikeMagicWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Some of us don't want to be engaged in chat too

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