FabSwingers.com forum: Messaging couples...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Okay so I need some advice, on a few occasions now I have been chatting with couples who just stop replying! Not even a "thanks but your boring us!"

Should I send another message to find out where I went wrong or just leave it? The latter is what I currently do!

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

Well, this is a bit difficult to answer, as we don't know how far you have taken the conversation.

I'll assume you have read their profile, scrutinised it carefully and actually read the "looking for..." section, and found yourself to be what they are looking for.... trust me, it sounds obvious, but we get mail from guys who blatently havent read ours, and get very abusive when it's pointed out to them!

Then, you say you have been "chatting", but you don't say if it's in the chatrooms, or via mail through their profile, and over what sort of timeframe?

Also, you give no hint as to how intimate, or otherwise, the conversation has become, or who initiated it.

Bottom line, and this is in no way an accusation, just an example.... if you have ploughed in, contacted them even though you are not what they are looking for, and then started being crude, then there is every possibility that's what's put them off.

Examine your conversations with these couples, and try to see if there is a pattern, a similar point at which it all goes south, and you may find your answer, either that or you just keep hitting those profiles that blight swinging via the internet, the dreaded "couple" who are actually a single guy looking for pics and cheap thrills lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I asked this exact same question yesterday but got no replies. I found an interesting couple, all the correct boxes ticked and tried to open some banter, but they were so busy snowed under with all the messages from others, that basically I never got a look in and just got deleted. Do you keep trying or walk away? Are they indeed really a couple and not just the bloke coming on here looking for thrills as said. Its a tough call whether to bother them and try again, but I just feel like Im being a pest

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

If they didn't answer, move on and find someone that will.

Just because you think you ticked all their boxes, doesn't mean you actually did.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I havent actually read your profile but a lot of couples n fems will read your profile first. If they don't like the profile they don't even bother with the message n delete without reading harsh but it happens

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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago

Midlothian

keep an eye out on their status update:may be they got a meet planned+busy chatting with them...we get msgd about meeting on the day we put up that we meetingsome1!....did they stopped chatting on a week-end?We don't chat much as we busy with meets than!....look out for:have other comm.outside fab on profiles,they may be just busy with fam etc.........also you new to the site + not verified:many cpls,with lmtd.playtime,like us, don't meet unverified sngls but keep an eye out for a later date

........depending how your chatting went:send a msg in a weeks time just asking how their week has been,put urself back on their radar without beeing pushy,if still no re-ply,we do btw,than take it as a not interested anymore.....hope that helped,be patiend with the right cpl it will be worse it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the replies, it's usually after a few email exchanges and then nothing! But hey I'm not going to lose any sleep, move on and try again I suppose! I was just wondering if couples would take kindly to a follow up message, there's enough plebs on here doing single guys damage without me wading in and doing more!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay so I need some advice, on a few occasions now I have been chatting with couples who just stop replying! Not even a "thanks but your boring us!"

Should I send another message to find out where I went wrong or just leave it? The latter is what I currently do!"

We stop talking to people if we feel the conversation is going nowhere. We wouldn't feel the need to explain that, the fact we have stopped messaging should be fairly self explanatory.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I asked this exact same question yesterday but got no replies. I found an interesting couple, all the correct boxes ticked and tried to open some banter, but they were so busy snowed under with all the messages from others, that basically I never got a look in and just got deleted. Do you keep trying or walk away? Are they indeed really a couple and not just the bloke coming on here looking for thrills as said. Its a tough call whether to bother them and try again, but I just feel like Im being a pest

A lot of assumptions there...

There is a certain arrogance to assuming that the lack of a reply is because they are either getting too many messages or fake. In reality the most likely explanation is that they just aren;t interested.

Sorry if that sounds harsh but seriously you will not get anywhere with that level of expectation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I just need to master this thing they call conversation, also replying to messages whilst driving doesn't really help one would suppose!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Okay so I need some advice, on a few occasions now I have been chatting with couples who just stop replying! Not even a "thanks but your boring us!"

Should I send another message to find out where I went wrong or just leave it? The latter is what I currently do!"

On the whole I'd say leave it. We find that conversations come to a natural end if things aren't going to go any further, one or both parties realise that we're not suited and just stop messaging. Hope you find what you're looking for soon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Should I send another message to find out where I went wrong or just leave it? The latter is what I currently do!"

NO! a "what did I do wrong" message will just annoy, probably get you blocked as well.

You would be better off reading what you sent and try to see a pattern in why it goes wrong... you say you are messaging when driving? DON'T! send less messages but take more time in composing them, it's like a slow motion conversation, so if you are repeatedly saying the wrong thing take more time to review your message before sending it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest we sometimes get overwhelmed with messages and so stop replying due to having other things to do! However as I often use my phone rather than pc, it's actually just too difficult to keep going :-/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay so I need some advice, on a few occasions now I have been chatting with couples who just stop replying! Not even a "thanks but your boring us!"

Should I send another message to find out where I went wrong or just leave it? The latter is what I currently do!"

Sometimes we just don't have time to carry on talking to everyone, and messages fall of the end of the inbox and we forget!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh to be part of a couple and be so in demand, one can only dream! I think I was just having a bad day and felt it must be me! I wouldn't send a follow up message it's not really me, but its really useful to get an insight into your thinking!

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