FabSwingers.com forum: Messaging single guys

By *wingsnroundabouts82 OP Couple
over a year ago

Fucksville

Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

I think next year we will actively seek out those we want to play with as most of the messages we get from guys are awful so maybe if we spent a bit of time looking instead of complaining it may be better?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

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By *easing_twoCouple
over a year ago

Bristol, Thornbury

I think they would just be happy to get a message

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"I think they would just be happy to get a message"

Do you mean grateful for ANY message?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say just be who you are, normal and respectful.

Don't make us jump through hoops is the biggest bug bare of mine, ie, if you want a face pic send one first.

We're all adults, have fun looking and sending those first messages, hopefully it'll give you an insight into what single guys go through

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By *omoxfordMan
over a year ago

leeds

Ideal message would say something like you caught my wives eye would you like to meet for social meet then hopefully progress further

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

I'd like to see the husband.

Too many couple profiles with invisible men.

I'd like to know what they expect from me? Playing with the lady only? Playing with both? Playing with the chap, while she watches? (If it's only one person meeting, does the partner know)

And mainly Who is writing.

(And does their partner know, & approve)

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By *ed wineMan
over a year ago

Where the streets have no name

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

Legible, in articulated English. Please.

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

As a single guy an ideal message to me would be similar to what an ideal message that a couple or single female would like to receive…

A friendly, polite, well written message giving a brief bit about them and what they’re looking for, with a respectful invitation to maybe message back if I am interested. Possibly with a picture or two attached

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A message off a couple would be great,,, I’d like them to be asking me to join them for a threesome, either bi or straight

If not a threesome, looking for a voyeur to watch them

,,,,,, fat chance,,,, !!!!!

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By *urham 3 riversMan
over a year ago

Co. Durham

agreed any contact would be appreciated if only laying down what is expected of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An Actual Message would be vital

Then one that doesn't mean 5 cancellations into 3 then back home for a paid hook up

A simple 'Yeah Sure' is beautiful remember single guys can't build your entire house before needing one

How about a lift too ?

We know hot couples pay Very High for Hop-scotch &nd tend to hide needs

Esp neighbours hiding their jobs

What about

'Hey Paul we've been looking how popping over, We can help each other"

Wouldn't want to hide myself or from the politics of the place

It does build

&That's included

&In that

We've been fucking everyone behind you & watching for the piss take, Without *finding** he/she knows we're paying too lol

Dirty Charlotte version @

Little paul

Tbh I don't want to know your attached to multi dollar international wanted sex ring that's going cost mine or shag your kids

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

Just don't be pushy, the meet tonight and now are very annoying. It also helps if the woman is sending and replying to messages as that can be a good way to build up chemistry.

Hmm, what else can I think of, just be relaxed and yourself respectful amd kind and you should be able to find what you're looking for xx

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

I would love you to message me but I prob won’t get one

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

"An Actual Message would be vital

Then one that doesn't mean 5 cancellations into 3 then back home for a paid hook up

A simple 'Yeah Sure' is beautiful remember single guys can't build your entire house before needing one

How about a lift too ?

We know hot couples pay Very High for Hop-scotch &nd tend to hide needs

Esp neighbours hiding their jobs

What about

'Hey Paul we've been looking how popping over, We can help each other"

Wouldn't want to hide myself or from the politics of the place

It does build

&That's included

&In that

We've been fucking everyone behind you & watching for the piss take, Without *finding** he/she knows we're paying too lol

Dirty Charlotte version @

Little paul

Tbh I don't want to know your attached to multi dollar international wanted sex ring that's going cost mine or shag your kids"

Huh?…

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

One that shows they have taken the time to read and respect my profile. One that doesn't assume that what it says on there is all lip service and tries to test my resolve.

Speak to me as an equal rather than a plaything.

Don't assume that because I'm a man that I'm going to play bi, shave off my beard, send my facepic and phone number or meet you right now just because you've instructed me to.

Don't assume I'm going to be grateful to receive your message.

Simple really.

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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough / Stamford

"Huh?…

My thoughts exactly.

(Bry)

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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough / Stamford

We don't currently send many first messages but if we did then we'd try and follow advice we give single guys - we'd go through the profile, see if we are what they are looking for, try and find something interesting from their profile to mention, ask open questions and not expect anything.

In our experience, single guys write better messages than couples as well....most couples that contact us seem to give the impression that they don't think the same rules apply to them and profiles are only to be read by single guys!

(Bry)

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By *egoMan
over a year ago

Preston

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

Well my dream message from a couple would be:-

Hi ‘insert name’

We were just browsing and came across your profile.

We were wondering if you would like to help us tick off a couple fantasies,

Mainly: …….

Do you think you’d be up for that?

If you think so, but want to see why we look like first, there’s plenty of pics in our profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just a down to earth message, nothing to ott just a conversation starter would be fine in my humble opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"An Actual Message would be vital

Then one that doesn't mean 5 cancellations into 3 then back home for a paid hook up

A simple 'Yeah Sure' is beautiful remember single guys can't build your entire house before needing one

How about a lift too ?

We know hot couples pay Very High for Hop-scotch &nd tend to hide needs

Esp neighbours hiding their jobs

What about

'Hey Paul we've been looking how popping over, We can help each other"

Wouldn't want to hide myself or from the politics of the place

It does build

&That's included

&In that

We've been fucking everyone behind you & watching for the piss take, Without *finding** he/she knows we're paying too lol

Dirty Charlotte version @

Little paul

Tbh I don't want to know your attached to multi dollar international wanted sex ring that's going cost mine or shag your kids

Huh?…

^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^

Thats a No Thanks ^^ esp then

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By *r SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

Some of us men get hundreds of messages day and it can become tedious going through the same thing one after the other.

Mention something about my profile that caused you to message me or a picture you like. Put some effort in to your first message.

Who am I kidding, just send a hi and I’ll respond

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"An Actual Message would be vital

Then one that doesn't mean 5 cancellations into 3 then back home for a paid hook up

A simple 'Yeah Sure' is beautiful remember single guys can't build your entire house before needing one

How about a lift too ?

We know hot couples pay Very High for Hop-scotch &nd tend to hide needs

Esp neighbours hiding their jobs

What about

'Hey Paul we've been looking how popping over, We can help each other"

Wouldn't want to hide myself or from the politics of the place

It does build

&That's included

&In that

We've been fucking everyone behind you & watching for the piss take, Without *finding** he/she knows we're paying too lol

Dirty Charlotte version @

Little paul

Tbh I don't want to know your attached to multi dollar international wanted sex ring that's going cost mine or shag your kids

Huh?…

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By *S2004Man
over a year ago

Bromsgrove

A message showing interest. On the rare occasion I get a woman or couple message first there can be a level of arrogance and expectation.

We all know single guys have a reputation for sending ‘wanna fuck’ messages but my experience is that many couples and females don’t think any conversation is required.

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By *r kinkyMan
over a year ago

kettering

This is so true No one loves the single males

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By *ad_Bod_ToddMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Hi OP,

Messages I've received from couples that had me reaching for the block button before I'd even read their profile have generally contained:

1. Phraseology that made it quite clear that they thought they were doing me a favour.

2. Thinly veiled suggestions that I am disposable as single guys are ten a penny on Fab.

3. Expecting/wanting me to do things that they are not prepared to do themselves i.e. send them a face pic when they are not prepared to send one themselves. Appear on cam so that they can check I am genuine. They don't accommodate but want to meet at my place tomorrow when they've messaged me today.

What sort of message would I like to receive? In all honesty I don't think it's much different to what the majority of ladies say they'd like to receive.

A message that:

1. Is respectful and recognises that we are equal.

2. Tells me what you can give as well as what you want.

3. Treat me like a person, not a commodity.

3. Clearly shows that you've read my profile!

Hope this helps?

Best wishes and Happy Holidays.

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By *wingsnroundabouts82 OP Couple
over a year ago

Fucksville

Thanks so much everyone for your replies x I'll do my best when we start playing again next year x

Merry Christmas one and all x x stay safe and stay healthy x

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By *MCMan
over a year ago

London/EA

I love the ones where people except double standards because of the fact you happen to be a single male - saying on their profile they don’t reply to ‘hi how are you?’ Then all their message contains is a hi..

But I’m sure op has got enough feedback to build a substantial message that is better than a hi, good luck!

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By *arker secrets 321Man
over a year ago

West Bromwich

I'd expect it 2 read as in wot u would expect 2 receive if it was a single guy ad sent the message .polite .funny .not pushy x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A favourite opener seems to be

“What you up to?” Accompanied by a cock picture.

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By *az87260Man
over a year ago

Cross inn

I agree they be happy and excited

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By *andystick72Man
over a year ago

kinky Street

Some of us still say no

Some of us picky and choosey

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By *dmundwilsonMan
over a year ago

Llandudno

true

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By *angtidy42Couple
over a year ago

Redditch

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

Any contact initially, but I'd like to know that I was conversing with both of the couple - I've been succoured before into thinking it's a couple when really it's just a manipulative bloke

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By *ickdasterdly51Man
over a year ago

Lingfield

Do you fancy chatting and see where it leads?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When being contacted by a couple it tends to be the male saying to get to theirs asap or it is off. It seems to be all about him. I once had a lovely couple call at mine and we chatted for a while before the thought of playing came up. It was so horny as by then we had got to know each other a little and even the slightest connection is such a turn on when it comes to clothing being removed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

I am not sure what I would want but I certainly know what I wouldn't want.

If I was only talking to the guy it would raise alarm bells. Is it a single guy pretending to be a couple?

If a guy wanted to know what I would do to his wife/partner if I met them that would raise alarm bells. Does his wife/partner know he is on here?

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By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Friendliness and open minds first and foremost. I do well at clubs and organised socials, but a message on Fab is a rarity, so for me it has to be a message that tells me a couple is genuinely interested and is prepared to take a little time to get to know me. Living up to my verifications is easy. Getting the opportunity to do so is far from it. I'm sure a lot of good guys feel similarly.

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By *hancer666Man
over a year ago

Redbourn

"An Actual Message would be vital

Then one that doesn't mean 5 cancellations into 3 then back home for a paid hook up

A simple 'Yeah Sure' is beautiful remember single guys can't build your entire house before needing one

How about a lift too ?

We know hot couples pay Very High for Hop-scotch &nd tend to hide needs

Esp neighbours hiding their jobs

What about

'Hey Paul we've been looking how popping over, We can help each other"

Wouldn't want to hide myself or from the politics of the place

It does build

&That's included

&In that

We've been fucking everyone behind you & watching for the piss take, Without *finding** he/she knows we're paying too lol

Dirty Charlotte version @

Little paul

Tbh I don't want to know your attached to multi dollar international wanted sex ring that's going cost mine or shag your kids

Huh?…

Wild guess but im assuming we are get the privilege of this thrilling installment (being generous here as im hoping its a privacy thing and your using code devised by both, or being off your tits high.... is still better than just gibberish not high) one of you has blocked the other one.....how is the 'blocking their profile so they cant message you going? ...suppose you could ask that question to each other on forum. Apologise, its not any of my business and i waded into your conversation without an invite. I suspect 2 blocks coming my way, just message me on forum let me know when done.

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By *hancer666Man
over a year ago

Redbourn

"An Actual Message would be vital

Then one that doesn't mean 5 cancellations into 3 then back home for a paid hook up

A simple 'Yeah Sure' is beautiful remember single guys can't build your entire house before needing one

How about a lift too ?

We know hot couples pay Very High for Hop-scotch &nd tend to hide needs

Esp neighbours hiding their jobs

What about

'Hey Paul we've been looking how popping over, We can help each other"

Wouldn't want to hide myself or from the politics of the place

It does build

&That's included

&In that

We've been fucking everyone behind you & watching for the piss take, Without *finding** he/she knows we're paying too lol

Dirty Charlotte version @

Little paul

Tbh I don't want to know your attached to multi dollar international wanted sex ring that's going cost mine or shag your kids

Huh?…

Oh yea, nice post OP.....adds a bit of balance to the discussion. I could add loads, but im already on 2 24 hour bans in as many weeks

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By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

A message saying that they have read my profile and verifications and would I like to meet up for a social before we all decide if we want to take things further.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

I can’t remember receiving any opening message from a couple in here, it’s always been them sending me a wink? Nothing wrong with that at all either, as it shows they’re interested in you, and if you like the look/sound of them, respond however you feel

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By *punkymonkey40Man
over a year ago

derby

"I think they would just be happy to get a message"

That's probably true for 99% of single males

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Initial message just simple ,like your profile would you be interested in meeting,then take it from there

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"Just wondering if a couple were to message you single guys, what would you want the message to look like?

There's always threads asking what couples are after but not what single guys want?

*This isn't a post to flood our inbox so please respect that* just looking for opinions x

I'm trying to work from home too so if I don't reply straight away apologies x

I often suggest folk do this, afterall you know better than any words you'd use what you seek.

How would you approach anyone ? We're not a different species(contrary to some opinions) read their profile mention something that appealed to you..send some face pictures and see where it leads.

Simples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

this info is good to read thank you for the post op and for the guys who contributed

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By *orkshireDrifterMan
over a year ago

Nafferton, nr Driffield.

I am all to aware that solo women and couples get bombarded by messages from lone men and most are just deleted unread. Having swung as part of a couple it can be tedious indeed!

For that reason I rarely message either but rely upon my profile to let people know as to what I offer and seek and leave them to contact me.

I am that way, not wasting my time and not pestering them.

It works out quite nicely!

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By *havedballsMan
over a year ago

shrewsbury

Just a simple message outlining what you're looking for, where, and how the single guy can help, possibly listing a few of the no go areas? for starters

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By *inja 636Man
over a year ago

Grays

As a single guy I would say a social is a must first off this can then allow everyone to be on the same page respect and manners too sound obvious

but as a single guy it amazes me how many women have messed me about over the years I find interaction with couples more engaging and respectful open and honest

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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough / Stamford

"Initial message just simple ,like your profile would you be interested in meeting,then take it from there "

Almost one of the worst messages. It looks like a copy'n'paste and shows literally no proof that they've actually read a profile. We get that exact message daily and what it really means is "I looked at your pics and nothing else".

(Bry)

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By *j321Man
over a year ago

Huddersfield

Look at.my profile and be genuine

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By *wingsnroundabouts82 OP Couple
over a year ago

Fucksville

Glad the thread has been helpful to others and thank you for your continued comments x all taken inboard x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I’d like a message to be the same as what I’d send out to people I’m interested in.

Be light hearted and introductory. Be humorous. Tell me why we’d be a good fit if we were to get together, what drew you to my profile enough to make you want to get in touch.

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By *uminsiderMKMan
over a year ago

St Austell

I'd like it to actually come from a couple who have a couple's profile, rather than someone claiming to be the husband/boyfriend of a wife/girlfriend who isn't even mentioned on their single male profile...

....unfortunately, the majority of approaches I've had this last year have been from the latter - and they tend to go silent when challenged about the pic of the supposed wife/girlfriend that they've sent, which a quick search reveals has come from an East European porn site or the like...

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By *angtidy42Couple
over a year ago

Redditch

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