FabSwingers.com forum: No sex and feeling down

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you?

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

Nope doesn’t bothere me

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By *ir SupremacyMan
over a year ago

Bolton

No I just get on with it .

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I've found it really bloody liberating. The choice has been mine to not bother with sex. So much less stress not having to worry whether I'm being taken for a mug or lied to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks to my arsehole attitude towards diabetes it’s 13+ years and counting without sex but no it doesn’t get me down as there are so many others ways to garner enjoyment between two people but here’s wishing you the best of luck with your dry spell op.

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By *he Ring WraithMan
over a year ago

Bradford

It has been so long since I had sex it is the least of my worries these days !

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

Not having sex doesn't get me down. I have to be honest though, having sex certainly cheers me up.

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By *erfectman122Man
over a year ago

from somewhere nice

Nope it doesn’t worry me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. No sex is better than bad sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No it doesn’t get me down.

I’m good at shutting off those feelings.

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By *teph BitchTV/TS
over a year ago

Manchester

I think about it and if it doesnt happen it doesnt matter. I cope

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex can have such a hold on you sometimes and the need for it,that it is very liberating to change tour mindset and be celibate for a while.

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

You think sex will lift your mood.

It won't.

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By *icheal99Man
over a year ago

newbridge

18 months for me,I’m use to it now lol

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By *heekyweebissimWoman
over a year ago

fife,

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you?

Absolutely! If I haven’t had sex for a while I get really down. It releases so may good life affirming endorphins

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "

Yes, absolutely. My happiness is pretty intrinsically linked to the amount of sex I'm having.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Is it the lack of sex or the lack of intimacy you find affects you?

I always felt that if the lack of sex affected me that badly there are ways of sorting that out assuming you can afford it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find when you want to have sex with your partner and they really don't want to over a long period it does affect you. I always felt down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Omg yes, lack of sex does make you feel low! If I go longer than 48 hours without hubby's dick the world is not ok haha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It used to for the first few years, but not any more.

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By *yreGuy99Man
over a year ago

Somewhere in Moria

For me its not the sex. It's being pretty much invisible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I envy everyone saying it doesn't affect them. Lack of sex and/or intimacy makes me depressed, anxious, angry and affects my ability to focus. Putting it this way probably makes it sound like addiction but it is what it is...

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By *willfindyouWoman
over a year ago

Not looking to meet new peeps.

Nope not at all, far to much going on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope, I'm quite content never having sex again. I enjoy the intimacy of either kissing or cuddling more. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely in the mood for it and love sex but if you told me tonight I couldn't have sex again I'd shrug my shoulders and carry on watching TV.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Sex can have such a hold on you sometimes and the need for it,that it is very liberating to change tour mindset and be celibate for a while."

I really like the idea of it , I fast from food for similar reasons but sex has a grip unlike food, alcohol etc

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "

No, because I don't base my own being on sex.

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By *arialoueWoman
over a year ago

bradford

Having no sex I never feel down coz of it got used to not having any

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By *oyRoy06Man
over a year ago

leighton buzzard

Id suggest there may be other reasons for feeling down, with a lack of sex (or concern thereof) being a contributing factor.

Id suggest taking a look at what's really getting you down and if necessary seek the right help to address it.

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By *anter007Man
over a year ago

peterborough

I'm a constant wanker anyway get me by

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By *avidagainMan
over a year ago

st.leonards on sea

lack of intimacy really affects me i am lucky i see friends i dont know what i would do otherwise x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "

Yes and maybe angry (frustrated)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I envy everyone saying it doesn't affect them. Lack of sex and/or intimacy makes me depressed, anxious, angry and affects my ability to focus. Putting it this way probably makes it sound like addiction but it is what it is..."

Yeah I get you. You need to feel wanted and have the intimacy.

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By *edonisticHandfulWoman
over a year ago

Mansfield

Yep. I get really low if I'm not getting any.

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By *ohnboy2569Man
over a year ago

Ballynahinch

Yes sex is like air if your not getting any it’s hard to live

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For a while it didn't bother me as my libido was non existent anyway. Found out why recently due to a health issue but now that's being sorted out, I've started to have those "feelings" again x

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By *axtanMan
over a year ago

los Cristianos now

Do you really give a shit what others are bothered about?

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

Depends…

When I wanted it and a partner rejected me all the time, that got me down. It wasn’t the sex especially, it was the rejection and after a while that’s self esteem and can be a slippery slope.

Your feelings may vary but don’t dismiss what you feel as unreasonable or unvalued, that just makes things worse

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you really give a shit what others are bothered about?"

Of course! I want to know if other people are affected in a similar way and if there are any similar factors to feeling that way.

Thanks for the conversation everyone, it feels like it affects some people more than others.

Maybe it's intimacy over sex that's the issue for me.

Other factors are probably contributing too, so thankyou for all the different perspectives. You're all lovely!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Occasionally, yes. Most of the time it doesn’t get me down, I’d just rather be in a position of having some….except for the times I overthink it and don’t want it at all.

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By *ames_SoloMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Sex is great when you're not getting any"

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Sex and intimacy affected how we experience the world, as can our decisions and behaviour. When I am ready for sex, including if I feel a heavy need, I ensure that I get it. I can live without it but I view it like other essential things in life. Including eating healthily, I ensure I nourish myself and don't get deficits that affect all of my life.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Aw I got this really uplifting and feelgood message:

happy and hopeful SupporterTick

Jason (48)

No I don't find a lack of sex depressing. What I find depressing is cheating fuck dickheads who ultimately ruin lives. Do you really think your wife is happy with you playing away? Whatever she says it's not healthy and deep down she is not happy....nor clearly are you. Do the right thing and get a divorce to release you both from your fake, sham marriage. You are both in denial. Its not healthy whatever you both might say.

Is this really necessary? Don't judge others by your own standards I say. They wouldn't even let me reply, the coward.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just for the record, if you're gonna private message me at least have the courtesy to allow me to message you back.

What's wrong with some people?

Jidgong, assuming and being a massive bellend aren't gonna help anyone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just for the record, if you're gonna private message me at least have the courtesy to allow me to message you back.

What's wrong with some people?

Jidgong, assuming and being a massive bellend aren't gonna help anyone.

Even though Jidgong could be a baddie in a bond film, it meant to say judging.

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By *isspurplechesterWoman
over a year ago

Chester

Lack of sex doesn’t make me feel low no, as I have a box full of toys! However I miss the touch and connection! If I allowed it to get me down then it would, but I have other areas of my life that need my attention more, so my sexual needs have to stay within my toy box until time allows it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "

Why don’t you just have more sex ?

Problem solved?

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By *rafficvanMan
over a year ago

Middletown

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "
just have a wank then

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By *edonisticHandfulWoman
over a year ago

Mansfield

"Aw I got this really uplifting and feelgood message:

happy and hopeful SupporterTick

Jason (48)

Is this really necessary? Don't judge others by your own standards I say. They wouldn't even let me reply, the coward. "

Sorry, some people are just moronic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find when you want to have sex with your partner and they really don't want to over a long period it does affect you. I always felt down."
that is so true, my relationship came to an because of it, it got me down so much I had no fight left in me to try and save it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you?

Why don’t you just have more sex ?

Problem solved?

If only it was that simple, eh? You have no idea.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I find when you want to have sex with your partner and they really don't want to over a long period it does affect you. I always felt down. that is so true, my relationship came to an because of it, it got me down so much I had no fight left in me to try and save it"

Do you feel a lot better these days?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Aw I got this really uplifting and feelgood message:

happy and hopeful SupporterTick

Jason (48)

Is this really necessary? Don't judge others by your own standards I say. They wouldn't even let me reply, the coward.

Sorry, some people are just moronic. "

Truth. I've had another private message from somebody else since then, calling my feelings stupid.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? just have a wank then"

You do know the difference between a wank and sex, don't you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Lack of sex doesn’t make me feel low no, as I have a box full of toys! However I miss the touch and connection! If I allowed it to get me down then it would, but I have other areas of my life that need my attention more, so my sexual needs have to stay within my toy box until time allows it

The toybox sounds good. Do you think it's different for men and women, though? I've seen a lot of women managing to not let it bother them (probably because women are awesome creatures anyway).

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah I get you. You need to feel wanted and have the intimacy."

I'm wondering now if it's the intimacy, rather than just the sex. Sweaty skin on sweaty skin. Deep penetration. Breathing in the ear.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Omg yes, lack of sex does make you feel low! If I go longer than 48 hours without hubby's dick the world is not ok haha."

I can understand and relate to that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For me its not the sex. It's being pretty much invisible."

I see you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Intimacy is what I crave. Doesn't always have to be sex.

And sometimes, no sex is better than bad sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Intimacy is what I crave. Doesn't always have to be sex.

And sometimes, no sex is better than bad sex. "

I'm feeling the intimacy vibe, now. Thankyou for bringing some clarity to my emotions, you and a lot of others here.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "

I can always have a wank which takes the edge of not having actual sex, but the not feeling wanted is a killer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've found it really bloody liberating. The choice has been mine to not bother with sex. So much less stress not having to worry whether I'm being taken for a mug or lied to."

Absolutely

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By *uncpl187Couple
over a year ago

Ramsgate

If I felt down every time I didn't have sex, I'd be a Submarine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah absolutely. I know being in a sexless marriage

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If I felt down every time I didn't have sex, I'd be a Submarine

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By *ose and her beastCouple
over a year ago

Watford

I find the longer I wait the better it is when I get it sometimes it gets a little maddening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you?

Why don’t you just have more sex ?

Problem solved?

If only it was that simple, eh? You have no idea. "

Unfortunately I do OP !

But hey what ye gonna do !?

Maybe it’s just a slump ?ive been saying that years now and I’m sticking to it makes things less depressing

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By *anshee99Woman
over a year ago

all over

Lack of intimacy and affection yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you?

Why don’t you just have more sex ?

Problem solved?

If only it was that simple, eh? You have no idea.

Unfortunately I do OP !

But hey what ye gonna do !?

Maybe it’s just a slump ?ive been saying that years now and I’m sticking to it makes things less depressing

You could be right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you?

Why don’t you just have more sex ?

Problem solved?

If only it was that simple, eh? You have no idea.

Unfortunately I do OP !

But hey what ye gonna do !?

Maybe it’s just a slump ?ive been saying that years now and I’m sticking to it makes things less depressing

You could be right. "

That would be a first mate !!ha

It’s Just a perspective !

Anyway I wouldn’t dwell to much

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a combination of things that are getting me down but I have had a considerable dry spell which is frustrating especially silly when the previous encounters weren’t very exciting or enjoyable.

So in short yeah I feel down without good sex

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

For someone to think about sex to much have too much time on their hands you need a distraction something that you might enjoy doing.

Doesn't bother me but the amount I need to do does

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you find a lack of sex can make you feel low?

Definitely a thing for me but what about you? "

Yes, definitely. But only if I didn't have it for prolonged periods of time, such as several months.

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

Same here mate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same here mate "

Youd love my mrs massive tits

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By *otwifeKazWoman
over a year ago

Stafford

Do you think that would be feeling bad because of rejection not necessarily because of no sex?

"I find when you want to have sex with your partner and they really don't want to over a long period it does affect you. I always felt down."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same here mate

Youd love my mrs massive tits "

I’ll be the judge mate bang on a pic

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

Everyone feeling down go to youtube and watch Jordan Patterson's 12 rules to Live Your Life lecture it's like 90 minutes but if you're open to change it will change your life..

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By *teve_S65Man
over a year ago

Peterborough

I hear a lot about these motivational speakers & ones I’ve looked at give you a taster then want the $$$$.

I will take a look at this though as 90 minutes is more than enough to know if it’s going to make a positive impact x

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

"I hear a lot about these motivational speakers & ones I’ve looked at give you a taster then want the $$$$.

I will take a look at this though as 90 minutes is more than enough to know if it’s going to make a positive impact x"

He has lots of content free for all on YouTube not motivational a psychologist.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Everyone feeling down go to youtube and watch Jordan Patterson's 12 rules to Live Your Life lecture it's like 90 minutes but if you're open to change it will change your life.."

I've seen this guy before. Some good stuff!

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

"Everyone feeling down go to youtube and watch Jordan Patterson's 12 rules to Live Your Life lecture it's like 90 minutes but if you're open to change it will change your life..

I've seen this guy before. Some good stuff! "

So you know what to do so why do you not do it!!!!

Genuine question to ask yourself.

So change 1 thing a week to make it better something like one less sugar in your tea snowballs form there..

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Everyone feeling down go to youtube and watch Jordan Patterson's 12 rules to Live Your Life lecture it's like 90 minutes but if you're open to change it will change your life..

I've seen this guy before. Some good stuff! "

You may well have come across him before because he's best known for being a truly gigantic piece of shit.

He's enormously misogynistic for a start. He has some extremely dodgy views on consent, and has argued that if women weren't so "choosy", then "rape would be unnecessary". He's also said that "there is something that isn't quite right" with women whose priority isn't popping out kids before they're thirty.

Then there's his transphobia, his denial the existence of systemic inequality, his denial of global warming, and his claim that you can't quit smoking without divine help.

Especially hilarious, given the site we're on, is his criticism of casual sex.

Reactionaries and the far right love him, of course, so he's leaned into this in pursuit of the grift.

Seriously nasty piece of work. Lends a thin academic veneer to some extremely problematic views, and acts as a gateway to the far right for the "I AM VERY SMART" brigade. Avoid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For someone to think about sex to much have too much time on their hands you need a distraction something that you might enjoy doing.

Doesn't bother me but the amount I need to do does "

This is the right mindset ...

The only person who can have a word with yourself, is you!

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Sex can have such a hold on you sometimes and the need for it,that it is very liberating to change tour mindset and be celibate for a while."

I keep thinking this but easier said than done

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By *antra MassageMan
over a year ago

South Side.

It's not absence of sex that bothers me, but absence of intimacy. Sex without intimacy is not worth it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too many people not having sex. And all open about it on a swinging site

. Fail somewhere.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

In life sex is a luxury everything else can still be pleasurably enjoyed.to think about sex to often is unhealthy you need to learn to focus as sex in life is a bonus if you don't have self control it's time to discuss with either your GP or someone from sexual health as it's not good to think about one thing constantly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rub one out and seize the day

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"Too many people not having sex. And all open about it on a swinging site

. Fail somewhere. "

But plenty more are

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Too many people not having sex. And all open about it on a swinging site

. Fail somewhere. "

I've often wondered which site all the people who actually enjoy sex and are having lots of it use.

Then it occurred to me they're probably too busy having a great time to be posting on the internet at all. Ho hum!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Frustrated yes, Down... NO. I refuse to let my sexual desires hold me hostage

Claire

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