FabSwingers.com forum: How to tell wife

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Best ways or

Advice on how

Tell the wife that I

Like to

Dress up

In sexy lingerie and high heels? Any advice please, anyone else told their wives, how

Did it go? Worried that she’ll

Think

I’m weird amd will

Leave me.x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Best ways or

Advice on how

Tell the wife that I

Like to

Dress up

In sexy lingerie and high heels? Any advice please, anyone else told their wives, how

Did it go? Worried that she’ll

Think

I’m weird amd will

Leave me.x"

I suppose it depends on why you want to tell her? Is it something you want to bring into your life with her, ie do it in front of her? You're probably the best judge of how she could react

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I doubt there is a best way. Some wives will understand some won’t.

All I’d say is that if it’s a big part of your life it might not be a good idea to keep it secret from the person you love.

One obvious route is to begin a conversation about how much nice women’s clothes are?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve seen this type of thread before. 99% of the time the wife’s head falls off and it ends in divorce. Keep your secret to yourself my friend. And if you can, find someone you can dress up for occasionally, who will take you for who want be.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Chat to your wife about cross dressing and see what her thoughts are.

If she's open to the idea and will want to stay with you great. She might be supportive but not want to be actively involved... Happy for you to dress but not with her.

There's many ways to make it work, but I do think good that you want to be open if you can, and it's unlikely to ruin your marriage.

I would recommend not blurting it out when shopping, like my ex did though...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Think about how long you've been together how well you know each other.is it something that you're able to talk to her about ? If not surprise her dress up and confront her head on if it's possible then hopefully she might understand as you talk with her.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is she on here with you ?

If not is she aware that you are ?

If the answer to either of those questions is yes then clearly you have an understanding of each other and trust to be able to be here. And if that's the case I think she would be more inclined to listen about how you feel as opposed to a wife who is completely in the dark about your activity here let alone your wants or need to wear lingerie. After all surely a wife who's willing to play here is going to be fairly open minded.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebwizMan
over a year ago

Clevedon

My ex discovered clothes in the attic that weren't hers. She confronted him and he admitted he liked it, that was the end of that for them. Be careful what you choose and be prepared for which road that leads you down.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Also remember keeping secrets in a relationship isn't a good thing either, so if you prefer to have a honest marriage just sit her down and explain that you've been meaning to tell her something,but you've struggled how to begin.but reminding her how much you love her,then just tell her it might be a complete shock then again she might find it funny and assume that you've struggled to discuss this but did. Only you know her,so if at other times you've been able to discuss things hopefully this would go just as smoothly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ach3Man
over a year ago

Watford

Of no interest to me, but you could always suggest a Thelma & Louise outfit for next fancy dress occasion and see how she takes it. If she enjoys putting make up on you and dressing you up, then you could take it from there, but like gambling never bet more than your prepared to loose (at least for the time being)!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sa JaneWoman
over a year ago

Cumbria

It's a risky decision to make for sure... but sure you already know that. If she found out you can say you have really wanted to tell her..and all might end well. If you do tell her you may well wish you hadn't. Like someone else has suggested..maybe sound out her views on it over a relaxed beer but one step at a time ..if at all would be my suggestion. Ask yourself why do you want to tell her especially if you risk losing her. Good luck with whatever you decide. x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

Try starting off small like next time you guys are in the bedroom ask her to rub her knickers on you and maybe slip them on.

As said before it’s never good to keep secrets long term

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve seen this type of thread before. 99% of the time the wife’s head falls off and it ends in divorce. Keep your secret to yourself my friend. And if you can, find someone you can dress up for occasionally, who will take you for who want be. "

Absolutely this

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No point trying to bury it if it’s going to come back later. I have this with my wife. Panties etc didn’t really upset her. I suppose I’d talked to kink about her before. I’ve tried lots of things in the past. Buying her books, sending her emails, writing stories for her, talking etc.. it’s a little frustrating as usually after a few drinks in bed she is open for pretty much everything but in the days after usually doesn’t like to discuss. Everyone is different though. You could try judge her reaction my asking her if you could masturbate into her knickers and mention you love the feel and would she mind if you tried them on..best to test the temperature of the water before jumping in completely

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she's kinky in a multitude of ways there is a greater chance of understanding, but if she's vanilla I wouldn't even bring it up .

Either way I recommend a few glasses of wine beforehand might be an idea

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speak to a close friend who knows what you're into or at least someone discrete you know you can trust.

Asking for help from the many freaks on here will end in you being fucked up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Speak to a close friend who knows what you're into or at least someone discrete you know you can trust.

Asking for help from the many freaks on here will end in you being fucked up."

It’s tricky to talk to friends about this stuff. My wife has said few times to me she never wants anyone else to know. I’ve told strangers on the internet but not anyone in our circle of friends

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *pice-meWoman
over a year ago

Home

I’d want a dinner date and drinks and just spend time with each other chatting about lots of normal things. Drop into the conversation about how much you love her and about ways you can both spice up your love life. Share ideas and how different materials make you feel and just slowly move on from that. You may be surprised.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Write it on the bottom of her shopping list!!!!!

Best way is to just talk to her and tell her that you rather fancy dressing up and would she help you.

Best of luck op.

Tony

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

I never understand these sorts of threads (not judging, just commenting here).

Weve been happily together for nearly 26 years and swinging for nearly 24 of them.

Honesty and open communication are the foundations of our marriage. I personally cant imagine hiding any part of my self away from my other half. This goes all the way back to our first date as well. We didnt see the point in hiding any aspects of our personalities, wants or desires from each other.

Maybe we are just lucky we found each other but I just cant imagine if you're with somone youre truly and deeply in.love with, youd not let them see the real you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icence_2_Thrill_006.9Man
over a year ago

sex bi the sea

Go to a Rocky Horror Party and get her to help you dress up and see how she takes it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could try suggesting role swaps, she wears the boxers and you her pants....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never understand these sorts of threads (not judging, just commenting here).

Weve been happily together for nearly 26 years and swinging for nearly 24 of them.

Maybe we are just lucky we found each other but I just cant imagine if you're with somone youre truly and deeply in.love with, youd not let them see the real you. "

I think you were lucky to get it all out in the open early. I was going through a phase in my life where I thought I could suppress bdsm thoughts and met my wife and started a vanilla relationship with her. Kink soon followed but I had been dishonest with myself and get really. It’s hard when you are almost happy and then have this knawing small thing that you know could risk your relationship but yet it won’t go away. Even harder if kids etc are involved.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread