FabSwingers.com forum: New Partner

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Evening all,

I have a new partner who is happy my being on here etc but is not so keen on joining in although secretly soft swinging is her fantasy, including doing it in front of others. Would a bar situation without her knowledge be a good idea from anyones experience? Way I see it, if its set up between myself and the other party and it goes well, whats the harm?

Thoughts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thoughts... Be reeeeally supportive and don't pressure her. Don't spring any surprises on her. Let her decide what she's ready for in her own time. If you try to push her, you may well put her off for good, or push her away.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks, I was thinking that if I got talking with REALLY experienced swingers then they could kinda approach, chat to us and seduce her for lack of a better word, but the experience they should have would hopefully mean that if bad vibes are felt its a no go...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thoughts... Be reeeeally supportive and don't pressure her. Don't spring any surprises on her. Let her decide what she's ready for in her own time. If you try to push her, you may well put her off for good, or push her away."

I totally agree. I'd be very careful putting any pressure on her to turn fantasy into reality. Sometimes reality doesn't live up to fantasy. It may not seem like pressure to you but she may well feel she pressured. What if she finds out you set it up behind her back? If you don't know for 100% that she ready I wouldn't do it. If you misjudge her it could backfire and ruin relationship. I knew Benz was swinger in previous marriage and yes it did sort of interest me but it took me a long time to turn that fantasy into reality and I struggled for a long time. Be patient and if she truly interested im sure it will happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks, I was thinking that if I got talking with REALLY experienced swingers then they could kinda approach, chat to us and seduce her for lack of a better word, but the experience they should have would hopefully mean that if bad vibes are felt its a no go..."

It all sounds good but trouble is in heat of moment she might agree to something that next day she will regret.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Personally I would hate to be set up like that,I would see it as completely devious and I would most certainly would have no issues with making that known if I ever found myself in that situation,with both my partner and the couple concerned

In reality would there seriously be that many people that would want to go to the trouble of meeting up with a guy that says he has a partner on the off chance of maybe having some fun? its a very elaborate scenario to achieve and it could all go so badly wrong,As a couple if we were meeting couples I would run a mile from a suggestion like that

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

agree with most of the other posters on this, it could end in tears big time..

we would never meet a cpl with the scenario you are contemplating tbh..

and would hazard a guess that a lot of folk would think single guy 'hedging his bets' and if we did turn up fair chance the lady has been 'taken ill' at the last minute..

communication is key with this, allow her to set the pace at her level and what she is totally comfortable with and if it happens it will be worthwhile..

good luck

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By *onshiCouple
over a year ago

amersham

hi be very carefull. there is a lovely little naturist spa club in Brighton it is naturist very strictly so in wet area and main social areas so nothing to sexually frightening but upstairs behind one closed door are all the play rooms one fully mirrored several closed rooms one large 6 massage bedded room, where she could just walk around and view or just play with you or maybe if you find the right people join in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't have said it better myself

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