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Does your partner know???

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Don't do it behind his back. Talk to him

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By *astMidsCouple555Couple
over a year ago

Leicester

If youre on here youve probably made the decision

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By *inchyorksMan
over a year ago

huddersfield

How would you feel if the roles were reversed, and that is not a dig, but a simple question so you can gauge how you would feel x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If youre on here youve probably made the decision "

I agree, you have a profile so your already doing it behind there back....maybe your relationship is not what you want it to be?

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

Why didn't you mention this to your partner earlier in your relationship?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I haven't done anything yet.

I'm just looking, he looks at porn I look here. I've not met or planned to meet anyone.

I was on here with my ex years ago and I miss it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We discussed it

He wasnt comfortable but said he would do it for me.

I dont want that,I want him to enjoy it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How would you feel if the roles were reversed, and that is not a dig, but a simple question so you can gauge how you would feel x"

I totally understand, I'm very experienced and confident he is not.

I would never meet anyone behind his back

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"We discussed it

He wasnt comfortable but said he would do it for me.

I dont want that,I want him to enjoy it"

you can't make someone enjoy something if they genuinely don't. You've a choice, don't do it or do it without him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've almost answered your own question with that reply.

You need to look in the mirror and ask yourself this one simple question: Which do you rate or value higher? Your relationship or your desire to swing?

There is no right/wrong answer but only you knows the answer. No one can answer that for you.

Hope you get sorted!

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

Do you mean "needs" or do you really mean "wants"?

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

I just wouldn't get the pleasure from it if I was disrespecting somebody I cared about through enjoying the lifestyle.

Only you know what's important to you, but for me-a potential partner would need to be ok with all of me .and my choice of how I live my life

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By *cooby5555Man
over a year ago

galway


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"
go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows?? go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion "

I'm not going to abuse you but I am going to disagree. Nobody is entitled to a sex life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I haven't done anything yet.

I'm just looking, he looks at porn I look here. I've not met or planned to meet anyone.

I was on here with my ex years ago and I miss it"

You have posted graphic photos I wouldn't say that was nothing.

If you want to swing and he doesn't either give up the swinging or give up him.

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By *cooby5555Man
over a year ago

galway


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows?? go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion

I'm not going to abuse you but I am going to disagree. Nobody is entitled to a sex life."
maybe worded wrong should be able to have a sex life sounds better ??

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

I would take him dogging and gently ease him into it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember a relationship is not just about sex,if you blame the lack of sex that just covers up something else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Follow your heart not your head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/12/20 09:26:47]

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By *cooby5555Man
over a year ago

galway


"How would you feel if the roles were reversed, and that is not a dig, but a simple question so you can gauge how you would feel x"
I wouldn’t mind if roles were reversed to be honest I wish she would

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

The thought shouldn't even enter your mind.

If you love him and he doesn't want to join the lifestyle either bow to his wishes or leave him.

Dont cheat on him.

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By *mmixtapeCouple
over a year ago

middle earth

For us, swinging is only fun because we are in it together. If either of us decide it's too much or we aren't interested anymore then we will step back as a unit. I made the choice that my partner matters more than the occasional shag from a stranger and a bit of attention.

At the end of the day OP, it's up to you, no one can hold your hand and tell you the answer. People cheat all the time, it's morally a horrible thing to do, if you consider fab as more important that your partner it might be worth having a chat about what you are really looking for in a relationship, and if that doesn't align with your partner at all then is maybe suggest a relationship councillor or breaking up with them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows?? go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion

I'm not going to abuse you but I am going to disagree. Nobody is entitled to a sex life."

I think people are entitled to pursue a sex life.

Not in the way the person you're responding to, or the OP for that matter, suggested, but we are entitled to have and enjoy sex, if we wish.

However, we're not entitled to have a sex life at a cost to others. So, it might be that said sex life only involves sex with one's hands or vibrator or perhaps a prostitute, but are entitled to pursue that if we so wish.

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By *cooby5555Man
over a year ago

galway


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows?? go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion

I'm not going to abuse you but I am going to disagree. Nobody is entitled to a sex life.

I think people are entitled to pursue a sex life.

Not in the way the person you're responding to, or the OP for that matter, suggested, but we are entitled to have and enjoy sex, if we wish.

However, we're not entitled to have a sex life at a cost to others. So, it might be that said sex life only involves sex with one's hands or vibrator or perhaps a prostitute, but are entitled to pursue that if we so wish. "

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By *cooby5555Man
over a year ago

galway


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows?? go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion

I'm not going to abuse you but I am going to disagree. Nobody is entitled to a sex life.

I think people are entitled to pursue a sex life.

Not in the way the person you're responding to, or the OP for that matter, suggested, but we are entitled to have and enjoy sex, if we wish.

However, we're not entitled to have a sex life at a cost to others. So, it might be that said sex life only involves sex with one's hands or vibrator or perhaps a prostitute, but are entitled to pursue that if we so wish. "
Tks better explanation than mine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you discussed playing solo with permission? That way you can enjoy the lifestyle without pressuring him to join in, best of both worlds.

Of he's not happy with that arrangement then I guess you need to be honest with yourself about what would make you more unhappy with your life, not having the sex life you want, or cheating on your partner. Go with whichever would make you happier, or at least the less unhappy xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know sex is very important but who would put sex before relationship?

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By *otTheReal01Man
over a year ago

London

There's a really good test for this sort of thing. If you're doing something that you wouldn't be comfortable telling your partner about, you're cheating.

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"
if my partner wasnt positive about this then I would stay away. X

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By *100Man
over a year ago

Essex

No she is going through the peri menopause so my fantasy is on here to give her a rest but i wouldn’t meet behind her back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why does everyone assume that because a person has a profile on here that they might be cheating?

Don’t they know that it’s almost impossible to get a meet at the moment due to Covid and the lockdown restrictions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why does everyone assume that because a person has a profile on here that they might be cheating?

Don’t they know that it’s almost impossible to get a meet at the moment due to Covid and the lockdown restrictions. "

It's because if you don't tell your partner you are on a swinging site and showing strangers your naked body, most people would consider that cheating. Cheating isn't just about having sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why does everyone assume that because a person has a profile on here that they might be cheating?

Don’t they know that it’s almost impossible to get a meet at the moment due to Covid and the lockdown restrictions.

It's because if you don't tell your partner you are on a swinging site and showing strangers your naked body, most people would consider that cheating. Cheating isn't just about having sex."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's a really good test for this sort of thing. If you're doing something that you wouldn't be comfortable telling your partner about, you're cheating."

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/12/20 17:39:08]

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By *empseyANDRedheadCouple
over a year ago

warwick


"For us, swinging is only fun because we are in it together. If either of us decide it's too much or we aren't interested anymore then we will step back as a unit. I made the choice that my partner matters more than the occasional shag from a stranger and a bit of attention.

At the end of the day OP, it's up to you, no one can hold your hand and tell you the answer. People cheat all the time, it's morally a horrible thing to do, if you consider fab as more important that your partner it might be worth having a chat about what you are really looking for in a relationship, and if that doesn't align with your partner at all then is maybe suggest a relationship councillor or breaking up with them. "

Well said, we entered the lifestyle together and as you say are a unit. It’s made us stronger,more open and had some amazing experiences but if either of us said that’s enough then it’s vanilla no questions asked

If op is considering “swinging” without partners consent then it’s simply cheating

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

Would you be happy with him seeing your profile on here? Your pics are quite explicit. If I didn’t want to swing and found my husband had a profile similar to yours, I’d consider that cheating already.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to sit down and have a good conversation about it all and dont hold anything back and let me know how you feel but do push him for answer he might need time to process it

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By *ustin500Man
over a year ago

woodbridge

I think he is just unsure he likes porn so enjoys couples having fun you need to talk more take him some we’re and flirt with a few guys reassure him meet a couple we’re the woman makes a fuss of him , it’s a time thing slowly slowly and you will both enjoy

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows?? go for it life’s too short I gave 3 years getting nothing at home and suggesting we should split she would beg me not to leave which I thought was selfish everyone is intitled to a sex life I know I am going to get abuse for this opinion "

You are ‘entitled’ to nothing. Sex is about two people, not one! If she is not giving you anything at home there is a reason why and you need to look at your relationship and sort it one way or the other. I would never beg a man to stay with me!

OP the fact you are on here is cheating and again you should sort out your relationship!

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There


"I think he is just unsure he likes porn so enjoys couples having fun you need to talk more take him some we’re and flirt with a few guys reassure him meet a couple we’re the woman makes a fuss of him , it’s a time thing slowly slowly and you will both enjoy "

I think she has to respect what he says. He’s said he doesn’t want to. I don’t think swinging is something that everyone will enjoy if they try. It’s not for everyone.

OP you know the answer to this without having to ask. Deciding to pursue this without your husbands consent is just cheating. If your ‘needs’ are so strong that you can’t be faithful then you should leave him. Don’t put him in the position when he has to accept or even witness his wife being unfaithful when he’s already said it’s not what he wanted. That’s a dreadful thing to do.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

If you are willing to go behind his back, then my suggestion would be, tell him that swinging IS something that you are going to do. Explain why you want to do it, and that you would rather do it WITH him involved. But make it clear that you are definitely going to do it.

Cal

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By *eventysixCouple
over a year ago

glossop

Cheating is the lowest. honesty and talking is the way to go

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??

If you are willing to go behind his back, then my suggestion would be, tell him that swinging IS something that you are going to do. Explain why you want to do it, and that you would rather do it WITH him involved. But make it clear that you are definitely going to do it.

Cal"

At least with this option, he will know the facts and be able to make a decision whether to continue or end the relationship.

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??

Would you be happy with him seeing your profile on here? Your pics are quite explicit. If I didn’t want to swing and found my husband had a profile similar to yours, I’d consider that cheating already."

Yeah this .... you’re already betraying his trust by displaying intimate photos.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

You use to love the lifestyle,yet your profile says you are new?

Nothing suspicious here art all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking and touching are two different things

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"Looking and touching are two different things "

If you’re doing anything that you hide from your partner - that’s cheating. Where those boundaries lie is different for every couple. Some people would say just being on here sharing photos of a sexual nature is cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you."

The op partner has already said he is not okay with it....thats the point of her thread

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you."

Says a 25 year old ... you’ll learn all about loyalty and how important it is when you grow up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you.

The op partner has already said he is not okay with it....thats the point of her thread"

When replying to a post it's generally important to read what the OP is saying

"I haven't done anything yet.

I'm just looking, he looks at porn I look here. I've not met or planned to meet anyone.

I was on here with my ex years ago and I miss it"

It would appear, _ased on the information the lady has provided, that a conversation about whether or not he would be okay with her playing alone hasn't taken place yet. So no, that's not the point of this thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you.

Says a 25 year old ... you’ll learn all about loyalty and how important it is when you grow up. "

Ahh I do love a good bit of ageism.

Ironically, your comment proves there is little correlation between age and maturity. Also, your little attack on my character couldn't be further from the truth. You know nothing about me. You also know nothing about OP and her character and yet you've made a whole host of accusations and assumptions. Merely having a profile on here doesn't make you a cheat, people use this site for all sorts of reasons aside from arranging meets - using the forums, looking at pics/videos, keeping up with friends, or even just getting general advice about swinging and clubs. The OP wasn't asking you to cast judgement on her presence here or make assumptions about how she uses the site, she was asking for advice. If you haven't got anything to add to that discussion, refrain from partaking.

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you.

Says a 25 year old ... you’ll learn all about loyalty and how important it is when you grow up.

Ahh I do love a good bit of ageism.

Ironically, your comment proves there is little correlation between age and maturity. Also, your little attack on my character couldn't be further from the truth. You know nothing about me. You also know nothing about OP and her character and yet you've made a whole host of accusations and assumptions. Merely having a profile on here doesn't make you a cheat, people use this site for all sorts of reasons aside from arranging meets - using the forums, looking at pics/videos, keeping up with friends, or even just getting general advice about swinging and clubs. The OP wasn't asking you to cast judgement on her presence here or make assumptions about how she uses the site, she was asking for advice. If you haven't got anything to add to that discussion, refrain from partaking. "

Again ‘says the 25 year old’ is it arrogance or ignorance or youth? Both probably in your case.

No one has any clue about any other persons relationship but (once again) showing your immaturity you cannot use a one size fits all - some people would see flashing your genitals for all to see as cheating just because you don’t is simply irrelevant.

It is a forum and people can make whatever comments they wish wirh or without your blessing so crack on.

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"Why does everyone assume that because a person has a profile on here that they might be cheating?

Don’t they know that it’s almost impossible to get a meet at the moment due to Covid and the lockdown restrictions.

It's because if you don't tell your partner you are on a swinging site and showing strangers your naked body, most people would consider that cheating. Cheating isn't just about having sex."

This

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By *athan 123Man
over a year ago

rochdale oldham border


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

You only live once

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By *addyBabygirl2020Couple
over a year ago

norwich


"Why does everyone assume that because a person has a profile on here that they might be cheating?

Don’t they know that it’s almost impossible to get a meet at the moment due to Covid and the lockdown restrictions. "

Almost impossible for a single man, still very easy for a women or couple.

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By *yphodMan
over a year ago

London

Why not slowly ease him into it.

Visit a spa type club, even if it's just sitting around naked in a hot tub, sauna and go and play on your own in a rest room.

Then a bit of soft swinging, reading him a little saying he has permission to touch the other other woman?

Do you like woman as well? I don't know many men who would not go for and ffm.

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By *aseMan
over a year ago

Gourock

Just do abit of window shopping

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By *ootprints1629Couple
over a year ago

somewhere in moray


"We discussed it

He wasnt comfortable but said he would do it for me.

I dont want that,I want him to enjoy it"

In this sort of lifestyle as you probably know that doing it for someone will never work.

I agree with a previous comment about how would you feel if you found out your partner was sleeping with multiple people? Personally I would stick to your vows. If he found out somehow could you live with the guilt of you really hurting someone who loves you...I'm not judging but just giving some sensible advice, you could be risking your marriage...but if you feel that strongly about it, them maybe ask him would he agree to letting you be on here meeting people but with some ground rules in place. Whatever comes of it for you. Good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you.

Says a 25 year old ... you’ll learn all about loyalty and how important it is when you grow up.

Ahh I do love a good bit of ageism.

Ironically, your comment proves there is little correlation between age and maturity. Also, your little attack on my character couldn't be further from the truth. You know nothing about me. You also know nothing about OP and her character and yet you've made a whole host of accusations and assumptions. Merely having a profile on here doesn't make you a cheat, people use this site for all sorts of reasons aside from arranging meets - using the forums, looking at pics/videos, keeping up with friends, or even just getting general advice about swinging and clubs. The OP wasn't asking you to cast judgement on her presence here or make assumptions about how she uses the site, she was asking for advice. If you haven't got anything to add to that discussion, refrain from partaking.

Again ‘says the 25 year old’ is it arrogance or ignorance or youth? Both probably in your case.

No one has any clue about any other persons relationship but (once again) showing your immaturity you cannot use a one size fits all - some people would see flashing your genitals for all to see as cheating just because you don’t is simply irrelevant.

It is a forum and people can make whatever comments they wish wirh or without your blessing so crack on. "

I'm showing my immaturity and yet you're the one resorting to personal attacks? Ok Karen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

Again! Your profile says you're new to tjist!

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"Blimey, there are some right holier than thou types on here, some of you definitely need to give your heads a wobble. She's not cheating by having a profile on here any more than her partner would be for having a profile on a porn website.

Tbh OP if this is important to you, you need to either find out if he's okay with you pursuing it alone (and genuinely okay with it, not just saying it to please you only to later have a miniature breakdown about it) or end the realtionship and find someone you're more compatible with. Whether it is a "want" or a "need" is immaterial, if it's important to you, it's important to you - and if you're contemplating infidelity then I'd say you've already decided it is important to you.

Says a 25 year old ... you’ll learn all about loyalty and how important it is when you grow up.

Ahh I do love a good bit of ageism.

Ironically, your comment proves there is little correlation between age and maturity. Also, your little attack on my character couldn't be further from the truth. You know nothing about me. You also know nothing about OP and her character and yet you've made a whole host of accusations and assumptions. Merely having a profile on here doesn't make you a cheat, people use this site for all sorts of reasons aside from arranging meets - using the forums, looking at pics/videos, keeping up with friends, or even just getting general advice about swinging and clubs. The OP wasn't asking you to cast judgement on her presence here or make assumptions about how she uses the site, she was asking for advice. If you haven't got anything to add to that discussion, refrain from partaking.

Again ‘says the 25 year old’ is it arrogance or ignorance or youth? Both probably in your case.

No one has any clue about any other persons relationship but (once again) showing your immaturity you cannot use a one size fits all - some people would see flashing your genitals for all to see as cheating just because you don’t is simply irrelevant.

It is a forum and people can make whatever comments they wish wirh or without your blessing so crack on.

I'm showing my immaturity and yet you're the one resorting to personal attacks? Ok Karen "

Hahahaha ..... oooh a fabulous demonstration of maturity there. You just keep digging sunshine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

Vows aren't meant to be temporary. I think you should consider a) why you want to try this lifestyle again, and b) what you would feel when your husband, who inevitably will be feeling unloved, cops off with the first sympathetic woman at work while you're out "fulfilling your needs".

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By *indfeedfuckCouple
over a year ago

Harlow

I think a few of these replies have been a bit harsh on OP. It’s easy to say that she should deny herself when the person saying that doesn’t have that dilemma. Many of us want multiple partners and some of us are lucky enough to have partners who want the same (and I do like seeing Kate with someone else’s cock in her ??).

In so far as OP is concerned, you said he’s shy but willing to try swinging for you. Why not (once they reopen, obviously) take him to a nice club and sit in the hot tub with him and just play with him. See if he gets comfortable enough to consider taking things further x

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By *merald Eyes XWoman
over a year ago

Can you find me….

You only live once....

Well you live every day and die once!

Do what you feel comfortable with....

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"You only live once....

Well you live every day and die once!

Do what you feel comfortable with....

"

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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago

Sandwich


"I'm in a dilemma,

I want to try this lifestyle again, I used to love it but my partner does not. Should I be a bitch and fulfill my needs or should I fulfill my vows??"

Which needs do you need fulfilling that are not being met?

There are so many options within this lifestyle that it should be possible with an open and frank discussion with your partner to come to an acceptable compromise.

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By *ussD1Man
over a year ago

Gloucester

An interesting thread where the word ‘morals’ and vows are defended along with this defence of the institution of marriage. Surely marriage vows ‘forsaking all others’ are being breached by everyone on this site even if they are a consenting couple? I’m not sure the Christian institution of marriage allows for any sexual interaction outside of the marriage consensual or not. I’m therefore intrigued, whichever way you look at it by the judgement of others who themselves are in contravention of the vows they took. Me, it’s simple, everyone is an individual and has a right, a human right to make choices bad or good. No one has the right to deny them that right. Dealing with the consequences of those choices is also theirs to bear.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Talk to him OP. The fact that you are on here already speaks volumes.

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