FabSwingers.com forum: Married

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

surely no matter the situation if you are doing this behind your wifes back then it is not good.imagine the pain you could be putting your other half through if she found out.

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By *lan157Man
over a year ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

You only joined two weeks ago. You should have zero expectations without any cause at this stage .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You only joined two weeks ago. You should have zero expectations without any cause at this stage ."

I don't have that much expectation anyway, just trying to give myself the best chance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input. "

I am not judging OK let's be clear, what you do is your business but, I've been cheated on and there's no way I'd be interested in you as I know how it almost destroyed me so wouldn't wish to be party to that happening to another woman. I'm guessing I'll not be alone in thinking that so possibly a reason alongside your being very new and restrictions around.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

You’ve joined during a global pandemic which isn’t a great start tbh. Mr.

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By *rsPricklePantsWoman
over a year ago

Room 237 at The Overlook Hotel, Suffolk

For me personally it would be that you're playing away but try taking a look at your profile does it contain anything that might spark interest? Try adding some more pictures maybe, you have to remember your profile is the main thing it's what many women will look at before even reading any message you may send

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You’ve joined during a global pandemic which isn’t a great start tbh. Mr. "

Fair point haha

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

Your probability of finding any or many people is greatly reduced because of your circumstances and it being pandemic. I was on here for over a year and finally met someone I actually enjoyed being with. It takes time and being very selective as there's alot of timewasters on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

here is a question, would you be ok about it if your wife was on here?

genuine question, cheating is cheating what ever way you justify it to yourself, im sure you have your reasons, but if you love her and are getting no sex at home, so live with it, many others do.

but atleast you are being honest about it

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By *anshee99Woman
over a year ago

all over

MYbe she didnt want to be a part in destroying another womans life forever?

Someone its even worse when people try and justify their reasoning

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By *ichie Rich 93Man
over a year ago

Wild S.West

Yeah it takes a long time and without verifications from other users its difficult for women especially to trust that you are not a psychopath.

Your married status will divide opinion. But you gotta expect that.

Make your profile cheeky without being vulgar.

Make your messages fun. Ladies like a sense of humour I'm told.

Final bit of advice get along to a party or two after restrictions they are great ways of meeting people in the scene and build up friendships and veris.

Its demolising initially with a lot of rejection but stick at it. You'll meet some really lovely people.

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By *ichie Rich 93Man
over a year ago

Wild S.West

You need loads more photos and don't send any cock pics . Only have cock pics on your friends photos too. I have found ladies on here like to be mentally much more than just shown your package they want the full package.

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By *ichie Rich 93Man
over a year ago

Wild S.West

The Hkop parties are great.

And ab fabs is meant to be good. Some you'll find will only let you in as a couple.

If you end up getting invited to Killing Kittens, even if the pope is coming for tea ...Go . Its meant to be awesome.

But I'd start with a Sutton party with Hkop Jo-lee and Mark who run them are awesome.

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input.

This ... whatever your ‘reasons’ you’re cheating on your wife.

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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago

Near Marlborough

Not commenting on relationship status. None of my business but that last paragraph smacks of drama. I’d lose it and be nothing but positive. No one cares what sites you’re on.

Just my opinion.

V x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Nobody should be arranging meets via fab anyway but as a single man it will always be more difficult.

Being married won't help though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home.

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home. "

Not quite sure that’s going to get you far

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By *oundmywaybackWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home. "

I can confirm that I am a women and I most definitely do meet. As you can see my my verifications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

Your standards are too high...... chat to any female regardless if you fancy them or not.....

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By *isstonguetasticjoWoman
over a year ago

widnes

I think therr are just to many sad married bastards on here or with gf

Just lookin yo shag anyone on here behind their partners backs 'JUST FOR SOME FUN' for themselves especially when they state their partners dont even know they are on here

Knowing their partners love the bones of them back home

If only they all knew wat u were up to .

Shows alot of u have no respect to ur partners or u dont love them

One day uvwill all get caught out

Then wat will u do

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By *ingdong11Man
over a year ago

emsworth

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input. "

I am judging you , and also judging anybody that’s willing to meet you , as utter lowlifes .

If your not getting what you want out of your marriage , leave her so she can find a decent bloke .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/09/20 17:35:11]

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By *uminsiderMKMan
over a year ago

St Austell

"I am judging you , and also judging anybody that’s willing to meet you , as utter lowlifes .

If your not getting what you want out of your marriage , leave her so she can find a decent bloke ."

And this from the guy who's 'fabbed' some of my photos today, all showing me with other men's wives - when the first line of my profile states "in sexless marriage", which to most people clearly suggests that I'm 'playing away'...

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By *.The.Busty.Fox.xWoman
over a year ago

Bournemouth

As a female who has met married men from this site before I always make sure that they are on here with permission.

1.If they tell me they have permission then fine.

2.If they tell me they don't have permission, then its a no from me.

3.If they tell me they are and then I find out ( because I always research ) that they dont have permission then they do not get invited back for another meet and thats explained to them in full before a block is put in place.

I value trust and honesty and the first thing I'll say about yourself is that you are honest, but do expect people to be the same on here and give their opinion on here because they will.

Dont ask people not to judge, people will regardless of what you say.

At the end of the day, you've got your reasons for being on here and some will be ok with that and some won't.

But do not expect people to stay silent on it because everyone has a story to tell from either side of the fence on this particular situation.

Good luck, finding what you are looking for

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home.

I can confirm that I am a women and I most definitely do meet. As you can see my my verifications

Likewise.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Your marital status would be an issue for me OP, with or without permission. Personally speaking, I don't want to meet anyone who is already in a relationship as it wouldn't go anywhere for me as I'm looking for the same. Somebody already attached can never give me that and I don't want to have to work around their other halves and families.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"As a female who has met married men from this site before I always make sure that they are on here with permission.

1.If they tell me they have permission then fine.

2.If they tell me they don't have permission, then its a no from me.

I value trust and honesty and the first thing I'll say about yourself is that you are honest, but do expect people to be the same on here and give their opinion on here because they will.

Dont ask people not to judge, people will regardless of what you say.

At the end of the day, you've got your reasons for being on here and some will be ok with that and some won't.

But do not expect people to stay silent on it because everyone has a story to tell from either side of the fence on this particular situation.

Good luck, finding what you are looking for"

Thankyou for that. A nice honest answer. I know people will judge when they know half a story. Just erks me. Don't understand why other than to say 'that's the reason I wouldnt'. It's quite funny some proper wronguns on here with the audacity to call me out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly, I applaud your honesty...

Without judgement, that will be a big NO from some people. For others, it won't matter a jot. As you're putting your status out there, they are free to make their own decisions. Reduced subset...

So for the sake of argument, you're now on fab as a single guy, in as much you are alone, there is just one of you, no partner to come along and play with. That reduces your options further. It's a bit like a Venn diagram...

Then there is you. Some people will find you attractive, others won't. That's life. Accept it. Another circle in the Venn...

There is a global pandemic, which may have passed you by. Options reduced even further....

Fab is a lot of things, but what it's not is an easy pickup joint. Getting to meet people on fab takes time, effort, patience, and not a lot of resilience. If you're looking for fast love dust off your George Michael CD or go elsewhere. The most action your balls will get is from being kicked rather than being played with.

If you have humour, resilience, and have a dick rather than being a dick you might get somewhere...

...just don't ask why your messages aren't being answered.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

As you have read many people on fab will not be impressed by your marital status. Just ignore those ones and concentrate on the ones that aren't too worried about that. Some women prefer married ones because a) there is no issue with getting clingy and b) it might be what they need for their marriage to survive.

Looking at your profile I would say you need more pics and need to seek out women who are aren't obsessed with tall guys. Oh, and explain where you would meet as you're unable to accommodate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It can be very hard on here for single men even in normal circumstances. You have to put in a lot of effort to stand out.

Lots of people aren't meeting right now because, you know, the covid thing.

Your marital status will definitely turn off some people who would otherwise be interested. But good for you for being honest about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As a female who has met married men from this site before I always make sure that they are on here with permission.

1.If they tell me they have permission then fine.

2.If they tell me they don't have permission, then its a no from me.

I value trust and honesty and the first thing I'll say about yourself is that you are honest, but do expect people to be the same on here and give their opinion on here because they will.

Dont ask people not to judge, people will regardless of what you say.

At the end of the day, you've got your reasons for being on here and some will be ok with that and some won't.

But do not expect people to stay silent on it because everyone has a story to tell from either side of the fence on this particular situation.

Good luck, finding what you are looking for

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

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By *winkleFairyCouple
over a year ago

I applaud your honesty.

It would always be a no from me. I’m a wife first and foremost. If the situation was reversed it would devastate me. It’s not a road I’m willing to travel.

Ultimately you’ve been on here 2 weeks. You have 1 photo. It’s a global pandemic. I’m not really sure what you were expecting?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!"

Why is it any of your business? I asked for people's opinion on my profile, not to cast judgement. Of you don't have an opinion then why bother with a reply just to tell me what a shit you think I am.

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you?

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By *G CoupleCouple
over a year ago

kent

We're on here for fun, what other people do with their private lives is of no concern to us. Married or not, it's none of our business.

Good luck op.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you? "

have not ever called you or anyone else a shit on here.

you say people dont know half the story and are judging you unfairly but you wont say why you are doing this?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you?

have not ever called you or anyone else a shit on here.

you say people dont know half the story and are judging you unfairly but you wont say why you are doing this?

Why are you so obsessed with my marriage? If you want to have the final say crack on I won't be giving you the time of day again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Female of a couple here. As some others have said, you need more pics on there. And remove the last paragraph on your profile, it’s not really needed. And definitely cock pics!

There are plenty of women/couples on here who wouldn’t be bothered whether you’re married and your wife doesn’t know. It’s your life and your business. You have to deal with the fall out if your wife ever found out.

Personally it wouldn’t bother me. I’m not looking for a relationship just sex with no strings attached.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you? "

well with that attatude, im not suprised you arent getting any meets, alot of people have given good advice, take it or dont, but dont moan about what they say, you asked the quwstion, the main point is, how many women want to play with you with the thought that they could be distroying a marrage???

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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago

Near Marlborough

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you?

I think there are plenty of women or couples that would. OP. You asked for some profile advice and some people have given it.

V x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

Schoolboy error, but you'll learn

You can ask people here not to judge you on this but they will. Plenty of them anyway. Fyi I'm not one of them.

Good luck but you will need endless patience.

Single men are 10 a penny. Married men are generally not required.

Obvs not everyone will hate you, but a good few will.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I will take some of the advice I've been given thankyou. Much of it bot public and private has been useful.

I have no problem with people telling me that is the reason they wouldn't meet.

I had a problem with people coming on here purely to tell me I shouldn't be doing it.

Anyway it's getting a little tetchy so I'll leave the thread to play out on its own and people can discuss my morality from their own glass houses to their own content.

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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago

Near Marlborough

I will take some of the advice I've been given thankyou. Much of it bot public and private has been useful.

I have no problem with people telling me that is the reason they wouldn't meet.

I had a problem with people coming on here purely to tell me I shouldn't be doing it.

Anyway it's getting a little tetchy so I'll leave the thread to play out on its own and people can discuss my morality from their own glass houses to their own content. "

Wise

V x

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

Your business ....end of ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your business ....end of ....

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"It’s your life and your business. You have to deal with the fall out if your wife ever found out.

Think you may find most of time that's not true we get just as much stick even when we don't know, a while back i had a lass ring me while I was with my kids!! Blaming me for sleeping with her bf who had told me he was single !!

So would be a big no from me but I am glad OP your at least truthful your married wish all the other single guys would take a leaf out of your book with honesty x

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I wouldn’t make such a big deal about it. You have no pics and your profile focuses only the fact that you are married and want a secret fuck, hardly a catch. Your situation isn’t for everyone , but even for those who are fine with it , you are not really selling yourself

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you? "

Because if you aren't upfront from the start you are taking away someone's choice of whether they want to meet you in the first place. I've had people lie about their status and it left me feeling used.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

People do meet married members of Fab. I think you’ve an arrogant attitude on this thread. People are entitled to their opinions, that’s what threads are for. Women read threads so I think your attitude on here will not make you attractive. You would definitely not be my choice. Good luck, you will need it on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I would never meet a married man, I don't care what his reason is. Couples that swing is one thing, married men here alone are cheats. I'm aware that things are never clear cut, but you make a commitment to a person to stay faithful when you marry them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home. "

Or maybe the problem is you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Judging is human nature.

We do it all the time without noticing.

Many women on here including myself will be put off by a man who cheats on his other half whatever the reason, some don’t care.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home. "

Same could be said about married men who ghost people because they are cheaters and got timing wrong etc.. I know plenty of cheaters on fab and women who will meet cheaters. Just don't expect masses amount of people to be interested but doesn't mean you can't get anyone. I even know people with terrible profiles with many verifications. Just luck and abit of skill

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By *lyreelMan
over a year ago

King's lynn

"We're on here for fun, what other people do with their private lives is of no concern to us. Married or not, it's none of our business.

Good luck op. "

Bravo... excellent... great reply.

This is a swingers site, by the very name of the site, it’s not a marital judgement site nor a place for people to get on their high horses about.

So many people shouldn’t sit in glass houses, none of us are perfect, but we are here to swing and have fun surely?

Keep it nice ffs.

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

Here's a comment based on your original question!

Truth is, some women will automatically say no if you state you're married. If you lie and they find out, it risks anger and hurt and contempt, so in my opinion, stating it is a positive on your part. This lessens your chance overall, but some will be OK with it.

I would be interested in chatting with you based on your profile (not saying I'm your type, just that there are women out here who would).

It is clear, to the point, and says a bit about you without going over the top. (No dramatic claims of breathing out of your ears, etc!!). You have a pic up, and explain your past experiences.

In short (after all this long version): yes, your marriage status is off putting to many, but not all. Your profile is fine.

As stated above, too--the virus situation is just making is hard for everyone attempting make a sane connection. Give it time.

As for people judging, some judge for any and all reasons, you can never aim to please all, so don't even attempt it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

So, just for a change of pace, no judgement. You're in the biggest pool of people on here, single males. 1 staged pic, no 'normal' pics of you, and nothing apart from your torso to base attraction on. Your profile feels us you're married and in trouble. Nothing to hint at interests or qualities. You've never met or played as a swinger, which is quite a handicap on here, because it's not tinder. Open, honest appraisal of your profile. And in case you get annoyed by that, I had a successful single profile on here and other sites for around 10years.

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off

Though, to be fair---some of us like meeting guys who are new to the scene, don't think their only asset is their body, and appear to be honest in their approach to the site.

It's what makes Fab great--we are all different!

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By *ucianpoundCouple
over a year ago

Cap d’Agde, France

20 years ago when my wife wasn’t very sexual I told her I wanted more.

There followed a series of affairs/assignments, with my wife’s knowledge, but the problem was that my lovers always wanted more than I would give.

Long open conversations led us into swinging 10 years ago.

Now, my wife is very sexual, loves the lifestyle, probably more than me.

I know it’s difficult but sometimes having those long conversations about what you both want can really help your couple!

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield

First thing we would say is cut all the mentions of being married, people here prefer blissful ignorance of that topic.

We are not saying lie about it, if someone asks tell them you are married but don't expect people to be complicit in your extra marital affairs.

We do not know your circumstances and do not want to know your circumstances, we are just hear to enjoy sexual fun with others.

Having being told you are meeting without your partner knowing we doubt if we would meet, otherwise we would.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me its not the married issue its the honesty element.

The fact is a married man who lies to his wife (someone he has an intense relationship with) would have no issues lying to me (someone he barely knows). So my issue is how can I trust someone on sti's, hiv or a myriad of other safety issues when he clearly has no qualms about lying just so he can achieve his aim of emptying his balls.

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

[Removed by poster at 11/09/20 11:34:04]

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

[Removed by poster at 11/09/20 11:36:54]

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"First thing we would say is cut all the mentions of being married, people here prefer blissful ignorance of that topic.

We are not saying lie about it, if someone asks tell them you are married but don't expect people to be complicit in your extra marital affairs.

We do not know your circumstances and do not want to know your circumstances, we are just hear to enjoy sexual fun with others.

Having being told you are meeting without your partner knowing we doubt if we would meet, otherwise we would."

Oh my stupid auto correct lol 3rd time lucky posting

When men message me from a single profile I expect them to be exactly that and we all know most of us women look at the profile first so them saying there that they are attached playing away extra is exactly the right thing to do i shouldn't have to ask to get lied to anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

You're cheating on her and if anyone has been cheated on they'll tell you it ruins their life. No justification for that really is there

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By *eastAndTheHarlotCouple
over a year ago

Hartlepool

"We're on here for fun, what other people do with their private lives is of no concern to us. Married or not, it's none of our business.

Good luck op.

Bravo... excellent... great reply.

This is a swingers site, by the very name of the site, it’s not a marital judgement site nor a place for people to get on their high horses about.

So many people shouldn’t sit in glass houses, none of us are perfect, but we are here to swing and have fun surely?

Keep it nice ffs. "

Exactly! It's a swingers site. It isn't swinging if your wife is at home and you're lying about where you are and what you're doing.

That's just cheating.

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By *ingdong11Man
over a year ago

emsworth

"I am judging you , and also judging anybody that’s willing to meet you , as utter lowlifes .

If your not getting what you want out of your marriage , leave her so she can find a decent bloke .

I have not read your profile , just looked at the pics that you mentioned, some people are in sexless marriages but have permission to play .

Cheating is wrong and hurtful .

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By *ingdong11Man
over a year ago

emsworth

"Firstly, I applaud your honesty...

Without judgement, that will be a big NO from some people. For others, it won't matter a jot. As you're putting your status out there, they are free to make their own decisions. Reduced subset...

Then there is you. Some people will find you attractive, others won't. That's life. Accept it. Another circle in the Venn...

There is a global pandemic, which may have passed you by. Options reduced even further....

If you have humour, resilience, and have a dick rather than being a dick you might get somewhere...

...just don't ask why your messages aren't being answered.

Hilarious , your applauding honesty from someone that is lying to his own wife ?? Really !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we met on here 3 years ago but there is no way either of us would cheat on each other

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By *eastAndTheHarlotCouple
over a year ago

Hartlepool

We value honesty and trust. You can't give that to the person you married then you won't give it to us. Why would we meet someone who has no values.

Even if it's not in your profile, it's very easy to tell when someone is cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only read some of the comments, but this is such a judgey thread (and topic), that I had to stop and comment. I think the only one that gets more stick than cheating husbands is bareback- and even that seems to have more acceptance these days.

I think there are rules about critiquing profiles unless it's been asked for, so I wont comment on your profile itself. What I WILL say is you're up against a lot of competition and some of these guys are almost as good looking as I am. So you really really really need to think about how you're selling yourself - with your pics, your profile, and your forum posts.

Now that's out of the way...

Personally, we don't give a runny shit if you're married, single, poly, whatever. We honestly don't care if she knows or not. She's not our responsibility, and neither are you. We couldn't hope to have any understanding of the dynamic at your home, and to do so would be presumptious to the point of conceit.

When people say stuff like "bleeerrr if you don't luv 'er den just leaf, innit" I cringe. We all know it really isn't that simple for countless reasons. The shortsightedness of that kind of comment is astounding.

We're never going to judge you on that stuff - it just simply isn't our place to.

Sell yourself on your profile to people like us (if you want to), turn up when you say you will and do what you agreed to do and you'll be fine....

...you won't really, it's bloody hard to get a decent meet on this site as a single guy.

Best of luck mate.

Jake and Becky x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For me its not the married issue its the honesty element.

Great post.

Could not agree more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am judging you , and also judging anybody that’s willing to meet you , as utter lowlifes .

If your not getting what you want out of your marriage , leave her so she can find a decent bloke .

This exactly.

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By *nicecplCouple
over a year ago

TELFORD

"I've only read some of the comments, but this is such a judgey thread (and topic), that I had to stop and comment. I think the only one that gets more stick than cheating husbands is bareback- and even that seems to have more acceptance these days.

Now that's out of the way...

We're never going to judge you on that stuff - it just simply isn't our place to.

Sell yourself on your profile to people like us (if you want to), turn up when you say you will and do what you agreed to do and you'll be fine....

...you won't really, it's bloody hard to get a decent meet on this site as a single guy.

Best of luck mate.

Jake and Becky x"

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

"Firstly, I applaud your honesty...

Without judgement, that will be a big NO from some people. For others, it won't matter a jot. As you're putting your status out there, they are free to make their own decisions. Reduced subset...

Then there is you. Some people will find you attractive, others won't. That's life. Accept it. Another circle in the Venn...

There is a global pandemic, which may have passed you by. Options reduced even further....

If you have humour, resilience, and have a dick rather than being a dick you might get somewhere...

...just don't ask why your messages aren't being answered.

Hilarious , your applauding honesty from someone that is lying to his own wife ?? Really ! "

We have no way of knowing what another person's story is.

If not for you, move on. If you're curious, ask.

Judging without bothering to find out the details is, without a doubt, a shitty attitude.

You don't have to like it, but not everyone's life is the same.

Move on if need be. No need to decide someone is below your moral standards based on what you think you know.

*** YOU = the general you, here, not anyone in specific.

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By *exycouplesswingCouple
over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Does a woman on here want to meet a married man for sex.

Yeah sure, he’s bound to be super trustworthy and upstanding

( not applicable to all situations but you see the point!?)

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

"Does a woman on here want to meet a married man for sex.

Yeah sure, he’s bound to be super trustworthy and upstanding

( not applicable to all situations but you see the point!?)"

We don't all judge. Tell me you've been in everyone's situation, and I'll trust you. Til then...not.

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By *exycouplesswingCouple
over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

"Does a woman on here want to meet a married man for sex.

Yeah sure, he’s bound to be super trustworthy and upstanding

( not applicable to all situations but you see the point!?)

Where was our judgement?

Just a simple observation that women tend not to want to meet married men as an assumption had been made on thier trustworthyness

Maybe you are the exception to that... and I’m happy for you... do as you wish

We don't all judge. Tell me you've been in everyone's situation, and I'll trust you. Til then...not."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s your wife we feel sorry for. If your relationship is that bad you feel the need to cheat behind her back on a swingers site then do her a favour and move on ... poor lady !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

Possibly. Also people are wary of meeting at present, even the permitted social meets.

Do be aware, you are one of many, and an easy filter is to rule out married men (for whatever reason so wished).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input. "

Adultery is adultery is adultery - why should people care whether you have a good reason or not?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home. "

And some just like the forum for the time being

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home.

Not quite sure that’s going to get you far

. "

No not sure it will help, got to admit was quite funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We're on here for fun, what other people do with their private lives is of no concern to us. Married or not, it's none of our business.

Good luck op.

Bravo... excellent... great reply.

This is a swingers site, by the very name of the site, it’s not a marital judgement site nor a place for people to get on their high horses about.

So many people shouldn’t sit in glass houses, none of us are perfect, but we are here to swing and have fun surely?

Keep it nice ffs. "

I can guess you're married

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off"

Mate! Delete that line “Guys don’t seem to have much room to be picky in here” !! Ffs! That will stop most women reading any further!

Also, look at your spelling and grammar; you don’t have much in your profile text, but at least have it correct and easy to read

Friendly tips bud

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

A profile should be organic, someone said it’s ok so in their opinion it’s fine, so leave it as it is. Then if that doesn’t work, look at other bits of advice given and try that instead.

Plenty of people are cheating on this site, you’re being honest and that should be recommended for all others on here who are also cheating. It gives people a chance to know not to meet you, if it’s against their moral compass.

I won’t judge I have my feelings on cheaters, but it’s not the reason for my comments. For me telling people in advance of meeting you, that you’re cheating is very honest and should be recognised

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By *eeowlsMan
over a year ago

sheffield

so fill us in why it is ok to do this behind your wifes back,tell us the whole story. and calling people proper wronguns!

If I was potentially meeting someone I would tell them the story if they asked, but I have no intention of meeting you so why would I tell you? "

Personally mate that’s made you look bad of course it people’s business as it’s their choice whether to meet you or not!!

I am married and my wife knows I am on here!! We was on as a cpl for a lot of years her health as took a bad turn for the worse so I meet alone!! I have put reason on my profile!!

But even then after having a few verifications and being on here for around 15 yrs as a cpl and now meeting alone I find it difficult to get anywhere!! So patience and wait till pandemic is over then judge this site

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By *winkleFairyCouple
over a year ago

"I'm a married guy, my wife is unaware of this profile. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. I put it on my profile so people know what I'm about.

I'm aware it's hard enough to stand out as a guy on here, without that. Funny enough I seem to be able to attract men no bother. I had agreed a meet with one lady then she cried off, nothing since.

It's hard to tell if it's just my marriage status, or something else putting people off

Mate! Delete that line “Guys don’t seem to have much room to be picky in here” !! Ffs! That will stop most women reading any further!

Also, look at your spelling and grammar; you don’t have much in your profile text, but at least have it correct and easy to read

Friendly tips bud

No I think he should leave it

Ultimately his profile should reflect him so people know what they are getting into...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't worry mate, most women on here don't meet they just like the attention they probably don't get at home.

I can confirm that I am a women and I most definitely do meet. As you can see my my verifications

I'd love to meet you but outside your age range

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP fab is a waiting game some on here can get meets straight away some never,your relationship status won't help but won't stop you either. There are women on here who will meet married/attached guys it's about finding them and read profiles see what the other person is looking for some might be in same boat as you, I've been on here as a single male and part of a couple and had meets off both so it's not impossible although I had permission which made it easier best bit of advice I coukd give you is be honest never lie about your status everyone's here for fun not drama

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s your wife we feel sorry for. If your relationship is that bad you feel the need to cheat behind her back on a swingers site then do her a favour and move on ... poor lady !! "

Our thoughts exactly.

Give her or him the chance to find someone who respects and values them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We're on here for fun, what other people do with their private lives is of no concern to us. Married or not, it's none of our business.

Good luck op.

Bravo... excellent... great reply.

This is a swingers site, by the very name of the site, it’s not a marital judgement site nor a place for people to get on their high horses about.

So many people shouldn’t sit in glass houses, none of us are perfect, but we are here to swing and have fun surely?

Keep it nice ffs. "

Are you with a partner Kenny?

Glad you said it is a swinger's site, simply by the name.

It isn't called a cheaters site is it??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your profile sucks, its not worded very well, your pics are boring and the fact your using this site to cheat makes you scum to most people so good luck

But if you persist on trying, smarten up your profile text, make it more appealing, make your pictures arty/creative, stick out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your profile sucks, its not worded very well, your pics are boring and the fact your using this site to cheat makes you scum to most people so good luck

But if you persist on trying, smarten up your profile text, make it more appealing, make your pictures arty/creative, stick out

Judge strangers much?

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster

"Your profile sucks, its not worded very well, your pics are boring and the fact your using this site to cheat makes you scum to most people so good luck

But if you persist on trying, smarten up your profile text, make it more appealing, make your pictures arty/creative, stick out

Judge strangers much?"
evidently

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By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon

I will take some of the advice I've been given thankyou. Much of it bot public and private has been useful.

I have no problem with people telling me that is the reason they wouldn't meet.

I had a problem with people coming on here purely to tell me I shouldn't be doing it.

Anyway it's getting a little tetchy so I'll leave the thread to play out on its own and people can discuss my morality from their own glass houses to their own content. "

"from their own glass houses"...so you asked people not to judge you, but you put this?

The reasons you are struggling to get a meet, in no particular order...

1. There's a killer disease around.

2. You are married.

3. Even exceptional single guys are struggling.

4. Your attitude.

Dont post a thread asking for opinions if you arent ready for negative feedback.

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By *omer47Man
over a year ago

leigh

You won't get anything from the women on this site. I've been on here for a couple of years and not had a sniff of pussy, but it's funny how married women get plenty of meets. So if your a married man, women don't like men who cheat on them, but if your a married female who's doing exactly the same thing then that's wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will take some of the advice I've been given thankyou. Much of it bot public and private has been useful.

I have no problem with people telling me that is the reason they wouldn't meet.

I had a problem with people coming on here purely to tell me I shouldn't be doing it.

Anyway it's getting a little tetchy so I'll leave the thread to play out on its own and people can discuss my morality from their own glass houses to their own content.

"from their own glass houses"...so you asked people not to judge you, but you put this?

The reasons you are struggling to get a meet, in no particular order...

1. There's a killer disease around.

2. You are married.

3. Even exceptional single guys are struggling.

4. Your attitude.

Dont post a thread asking for opinions if you arent ready for negative feedback.

"
I totally agree with your opinion

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By *otcouple65Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

I will take some of the advice I've been given thankyou. Much of it bot public and private has been useful.

I have no problem with people telling me that is the reason they wouldn't meet.

I had a problem with people coming on here purely to tell me I shouldn't be doing it.

Anyway it's getting a little tetchy so I'll leave the thread to play out on its own and people can discuss my morality from their own glass houses to their own content.

"from their own glass houses"...so you asked people not to judge you, but you put this?

The reasons you are struggling to get a meet, in no particular order...

1. There's a killer disease around.

2. You are married.

3. Even exceptional single guys are struggling.

4. Your attitude.

Dont post a thread asking for opinions if you arent ready for negative feedback.

Tbh this is the most truthful response.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

"You won't get anything from the women on this site. I've been on here for a couple of years and not had a sniff of pussy, but it's funny how married women get plenty of meets. So if your a married man, women don't like men who cheat on them, but if your a married female who's doing exactly the same thing then that's wrong. "

You ever thought it’s not them, it could be me. Looked at your own profile and tried something different?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’ve been on here a couple of years?

One of your verifications is from 2009, that’s more than a couple of years!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input.

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For me its not the married issue its the honesty element.

You make a very interesting point Georgia, but also some assumptions...

You are assuming the OP has a very intense relationship with his wife. How do you know that? I would imagine if he's on here "looking" the relationship is far less intense than you may assume it is.

Your point about trust however is key. How do you trust? What is the basis on which you can trust someone? For some, trust happens easily and naturally, while other it never happens at all. However, while you are free to dislike the OP for going behind his partners back, you have to admire his honesty about his situation, even if you clearly don't like the sentiment. And perhaps that honesty is a step closer to building trust between the OP and whoever chooses to meet him?

With his honesty about his status, those who choose to meet him can take an informed decision. Rather that than imply or claim to be single when he isn't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Adultery is adultery is adultery - why should people care whether you have a good reason or not?"

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Admiring honesty of someone not being honest to their other half?

Oh, I have to laugh!

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By *nigmatic_AngelWoman
over a year ago

The place where fairies live

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input.

I am judging you , and also judging anybody that’s willing to meet you , as utter lowlifes .

If your not getting what you want out of your marriage , leave her so she can find a decent bloke .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stop cheating and be single. Or.swing. dont break hearts just for sex.

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By *inkerbell67Woman
over a year ago

Clacton on sea essex

There a lot of married people on here cheating, all for personal reasons ,never judge a book by its cover ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There a lot of married people on here cheating, all for personal reasons ,never judge a book by its cover .."

No matter how many there are on here, it still is wrong and disrespectful.

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By *hippy57Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

It seems married men are judged more than married women,is this the case ?

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By *arbellsWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

I'll tell you want comments like I've not had a sniff of pussy is not attractive. Females are not objects.

OP like many of people have said cheating is an instant no so that's proberly a massive factor, a global pandemic has changed the norm so alot of people arent meeting, your profile isn't great.

On fab women hold the power whether men like it or not so you do have to put in the work and effort!

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By *arbellsWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"It seems married men are judged more than married women,is this the case ?"

Possibly but then I know of/talked to more females won't meet married men and the men I've met/talked to couldn't care less and just want a fuck. Just my experience with who I've spoken to or met

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By *hippy57Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I read many forum posts,couples etc ,strongly against married men,but OK with married women,I know its there choose,

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By *arbellsWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"I read many forum posts,couples etc ,strongly against married men,but OK with married women,I know its there choose,"

Maybe those people choose to accept a married woman because people struggle to get meets with women where as men are in large demand so decide they don't need to meet married men but who knows

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By *lyreelMan
over a year ago

King's lynn

"There a lot of married people on here cheating, all for personal reasons ,never judge a book by its cover .."

Absolutely, too many people on their high horses spouting off about stuff that they know nothing about. No one knows the ins and outs of others relationship dynamics.

Here is one for all the peeps living in their glass houses..... research has shown that almost 60 percent of men and over 45 percent of women will cheat at some point in their marriages, so basically if 10 people respond saying it’s wrong to be unfaithful then look out, cos half of you are going at it like rabbits!!! Lol.

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By *arbellsWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"I read many forum posts,couples etc ,strongly against married men,but OK with married women,I know its there choose,

Maybe those people choose to accept a married woman because people struggle to get meets with women where as men are in large demand so decide they don't need to meet married men but who knows "
*lower demand

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By *oam_ShrimpsCouple
over a year ago

NEC Arden

"I'm a married guy, blah-blah. Don't judge everyone's situation is different. Blah-blah, or something else putting people off"

Call us petty or pedantic, but you lost us at, '...everyone is situation...'

Well you did ask, well sort of, not sure if it was a question....

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By *hippy57Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

When I was with first wife,we used to swing,we preferred married men,as more likely to be clean,std,s I mean,and less likely to get to involved,had occasions where single guys became emotionly involved

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South

"There a lot of married people on here cheating, all for personal reasons ,never judge a book by its cover ..

Absolutely, too many people on their high horses spouting off about stuff that they know nothing about. No one knows the ins and outs of others relationship dynamics.

Never have never will ... I’m judging cheating is abhorrent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"here is a question, would you be ok about it if your wife was on here?

genuine question, cheating is cheating what ever way you justify it to yourself, im sure you have your reasons, but if you love her and are getting no sex at home, so live with it, many others do.

but atleast you are being honest about it"

Imagine if he bumped into her on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/09/20 00:07:57]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im a bi male so meet married men or attached alot its a thrill

But at the same time I do think cheating is not a nice thing. I could make excuses for bicurious males but to meet other Women its hurting your wife/gf and she will fimd out eventually and be hurt. Yeah men loves their wives but want more but they risk hurting who they love. For sex only. Is it worth it? Member of a swing site lol

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By *rouble Is My Middle NameWoman
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

Swinging or secretly cheating is 2 completely different thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see you missed the don't judge bit. You don't know my relationship. Thanks for your input. "
the problem is that most, including us, will judge you, don't know your situation, but IMHO, if you are playing away, just think how you would feel if the roles were reversed, justify it too yourself all you like, but it's still cheating, and that wasn't said in a judgement way, but personally think it's about as low as you can get if your partner doesn't know, that bit was judgement.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There a lot of married people on here cheating, all for personal reasons ,never judge a book by its cover ..

Absolutely, too many people on their high horses spouting off about stuff that they know nothing about. No one knows the ins and outs of others relationship dynamics.

Never have never will ... I’m judging cheating is abhorrent "

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By *ounty durham bbw coupleCouple
over a year ago

darlington

Honesty is definitely better in your relationship status most people on here who meet regularly will of met a married or attached person at least you are giving people the option to scroll past most just lie

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By *VK2018Man
over a year ago

Preston

"We're on here for fun, what other people do with their private lives is of no concern to us. Married or not, it's none of our business.

Good luck op. "

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By *VK2018Man
over a year ago

Preston

Don't know why you should put yourself up for public opinion/judgement . It's your life and business as long as you are open and honest on your profile. Those who don't mind will chat to you. Those playing god will pass you by. My respect to some couples and ladies who made positive contributions.

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By *izzabelle and well hungCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh.

Perhaps she is on here and is cock blocking you.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

The request not to judge is pointless.

Most people make judgements on everything from which washing powder to use to whether or not to have children.

Expectimg or asking people to set aside logic and reason when it comes down to something as intimate as sexual relationships and the circumstances behind that is unrealistic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are happily married but would also love to go to a swingers club as we have never been, we not hardened at this by any means. We are not looking to get set upon by pestering people but do want to start going

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By *ittleREDridingWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

No judgement but it puts me off. I wouldn’t meet a married person who’s partner doesn’t know. If their partner does know and is into it then it’s a turn on tbh.

Sister solidarity for me personally

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