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Bringing up the subject

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By *orace99 OP   Man
over a year ago

York

This has probably been asked before, so please dont shout at me , How would you go about broaching the subject of swinging with you significant other?

Obviously we are both aware it goes on and neither has ever been "aw hell no" but how do you move on from there?

We haven't just been bound by the house and have had occasion to make use of the car and a truck.

Whenever we have occasion to pass one of the venues my other half does occasionally comment "Isn't that where we......" but neither have taken the conversation further.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

The bit where neither of you take the conversation further...that's where one of you need to be brave and take the conversation further. I know that sounds trite but if you're already talking along those lines you could say something like "what do you think about swinging?"

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By *rworldwide2000Man
over a year ago

wakefield

Just sit down and be honest about it all. You’ll thank yourselves later. Need a solid relationship to make it work.

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By *ebwizMan
over a year ago

Clevedon

We had the conversation 18 yrs ago.had some fun,but not for her anymore,she went off the idea so just me occasional parties with her permission.fantasy v reality can be quite different.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Just do it what do you have to lose , looks like you’re on here without her knowing so things obviously not good.

With the right support and going at her pace it’s rare to find a woman not up for it

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I suggest sticking that channel 4 documentary on and using it as an opening to chat about ‘would you like to do this’.

I was shitting bricks when I had to tell my new partner about my lifestyle but he accepted it and now enjoys taking part and going places.

I appreciate that’s a different situation though ac you are already in your relationship but If she does say it and you can explore the lifestyle together I can promise it will be the best move you’ve ever made. Xx

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By *uliaChrisCouple
over a year ago

westerham


"I suggest sticking that channel 4 documentary on and using it as an opening to chat about ‘would you like to do this’.

I was shitting bricks when I had to tell my new partner about my lifestyle but he accepted it and now enjoys taking part and going places.

I appreciate that’s a different situation though ac you are already in your relationship but If she does say it and you can explore the lifestyle together I can promise it will be the best move you’ve ever made. Xx"

We found that documentary quite depressing, wouldn’t use that if I were you tbh.

Also probably wouldn’t initially use the word swinging, maybe be more specific about fantasies ie threesomes, orgies, mfm etc

Swinging is such a broad term that your partner could interpret it however they want (eg straight swapping) and it could be a negative interpretation.

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By *orace99 OP   Man
over a year ago

York

Thank you for all the replies....

Going to have to put my big boy pants on by the sounds of it

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Thank you for all the replies....

Going to have to put my big boy pants on by the sounds of it "

Yes, you are. If you're going to have sex with other people you're going to have to talk about it and carry on talking.

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By *kblokenorthMan
over a year ago

Any

Make it about her - start a conversation and ask eg what are her fantasies? Bigger cock, being tied, another woman, or just introducing toys etc then a suggestion it would be horny if another was using the toy etc. Build on her replies, do it in small steps over a period of time and when you’ve already got her horny.....

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