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"How do you stop yourself having emotional feelings for the person who have casual sex with? (excluding one night stands) Do you choose someone who is the wild card, basically not your usual type but the sex is fun? Or choose someone who ticks one or two things you like about them? keep it simple, not much chat, fuck and go? Or you just don't get emotionally attached that easily? " I'll volunteer if you like.. | |||
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"How do you stop yourself having emotional feelings for the person who have casual sex with? (excluding one night stands) Do you choose someone who is the wild card, basically not your usual type but the sex is fun? Or choose someone who ticks one or two things you like about them? keep it simple, not much chat, fuck and go? Or you just don't get emotionally attached that easily? " My friend calls it "catching feelings" and tends to bale out at that point. Some people have the ability to not get attached - they are emotionally detached and in one sense I envy that! | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends" Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now" Why stop her if its working? | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Why stop her if its working?" It doesn't do anything for me now. Made me loose my confidence really | |||
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"It can be difficult. I get my confidence from the fact it turns me on and im married to a sexy women who other men fancy and know how good at sex she is but that she comes home to me" Good way of seeing it | |||
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"How do you stop yourself having emotional feelings for the person who have casual sex with? (excluding one night stands) Do you choose someone who is the wild card, basically not your usual type but the sex is fun? Or choose someone who ticks one or two things you like about them? keep it simple, not much chat, fuck and go? Or you just don't get emotionally attached that easily? " I make sure it's someone I wouldn't want a relationship with. | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Why stop her if its working? It doesn't do anything for me now. Made me loose my confidence really " Why is she still doing it if its hurting you? You're her primary partner | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Why stop her if its working? It doesn't do anything for me now. Made me loose my confidence really Why is she still doing it if its hurting you? You're her primary partner " Because he changed the rules, it's not all about the men ! | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Why stop her if its working? It doesn't do anything for me now. Made me loose my confidence really Why is she still doing it if its hurting you? You're her primary partner Because he changed the rules, it's not all about the men !" Yes but if it's hurting her marriage/relationship she should stop. | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Why stop her if its working? It doesn't do anything for me now. Made me loose my confidence really Why is she still doing it if its hurting you? You're her primary partner Because he changed the rules, it's not all about the men !" I know that but if I knew I was hurting someone I loved I'd stop doing whatever it was. I'd say the same to a woman. | |||
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"what about the feelings that you feel ignored when he doesn't give you the affection when you want it.. you know he's on a date with someone else? " You can't really demand someone's affection and attention, as much as you want it. I think that you should have an open and honest discussion with that person (provided you're at the stage where you can!). If I was in a relationship with someone I'd definitely listen to them and depending how strong my feelings are, I wouldn't want to upset what I have with them in order to get my quim filled by another. But it's individualistic and not a one fits all answer. | |||
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"wanting and demanding attention are two different things though. " Yes, I know they are. I was trying to explain that your wants might not match theirs. Do something to occupy your time? Remind yourself that feelings for you aren't negated by feelings for others ie accept that they're on a date with another but still like you. I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting affection and attention and can understand why you do esp times like those. | |||
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"what about the feelings that you feel ignored when he doesn't give you the affection when you want it.. you know he's on a date with someone else? " If it’s just casual it’s not his role to give you affection Casual to me implies no strings attached so it’s just a hook up when mutually convenient to both, if you want to meet more often than them, then maybe you need a second casual person or maybe a a boyfriend MrsB | |||
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"what about the feelings that you feel ignored when he doesn't give you the affection when you want it.. you know he's on a date with someone else? " Then you need to talk. So for me I’ve had fwb where we haven’t been exclusive and that’s been ok as we have communicated. I didn’t meet others - my choice. Funnily enough it only became an issue when I did. I generally only do exclusive fwbs and we meet others together. But again I communicate what I would like if they don’t want the same they are probably not for me. So if your upset they are meeting others because you have feels you really need to talk to him. Protect yourself | |||
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"How do you stop yourself having emotional feelings for the person who have casual sex with? (excluding one night stands) Do you choose someone who is the wild card, basically not your usual type but the sex is fun? Or choose someone who ticks one or two things you like about them? keep it simple, not much chat, fuck and go? Or you just don't get emotionally attached that easily? " You cant unless you detach from the beginning. I dumped my regular guy for the one im with and have been for 3 years this week. I fell in love snd we are very happy. But i still have a little look lol | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now" Sorry to be blunt, but if she's carrying on even though you've told her how uncomfortable it makes you - and us bullying you into accepting the situation - then it sounds like your marriage is already over. Unless you can find a woman or two to do the same with and tell her to just sick it up | |||
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"what about the feelings that you feel ignored when he doesn't give you the affection when you want it.. you know he's on a date with someone else? If it’s just casual it’s not his role to give you affection Casual to me implies no strings attached so it’s just a hook up when mutually convenient to both, if you want to meet more often than them, then maybe you need a second casual person or maybe a a boyfriend MrsB" | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Sorry to be blunt, but if she's carrying on even though you've told her how uncomfortable it makes you - and us bullying you into accepting the situation - then it sounds like your marriage is already over. Unless you can find a woman or two to do the same with and tell her to just sick it up" I think he already knows this but hasn't admitted it to himself yet. | |||
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"How do you stop yourself having emotional feelings for the person who have casual sex with? (excluding one night stands) Do you choose someone who is the wild card, basically not your usual type but the sex is fun? Or choose someone who ticks one or two things you like about them? keep it simple, not much chat, fuck and go? Or you just don't get emotionally attached that easily? " I think it’s just a mental ability to box it off. Choosing someone with which you’re incompatible with for an on going romantic relationship also helps. | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now" This is sadly the downside of swinging for a couple, when one decides it’s not for them anymore. It’s hard to close Pandora’s Box once it’s been opened. Sorry that you find yourselves in this situation. Hope you both manage to work it out. | |||
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"As a married woman I actually find the ones where you text/call a lot throughout the day more dangerous than fucking. It's easy to fuck without emotion, its when you become emotionally involved in each others lives that the feelings get deeper I think. " Yes totally... That is my situation.. We talk daily for hours | |||
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"is it true lower chance of developing feelings with a married man as you come straight away with the mindset he's definitely emotionally unavailable? " Not necessarily, emotions don’t abide by common sense. It depends more on the woman and how long you both have been swinging. I bet it happens more with newbies | |||
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"it seems like more men than women can separate emotions with sex? " Men are very sexually driven to copulat women are I think are more prone to feelings. | |||
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"it seems like more men than women can separate emotions with sex? Men are very sexually driven to copulat women are I think are more prone to feelings." Definitely... it did amaze me when I joined fab, how many liberated women there was. I always kept it hidden my sex life, good to be with other similar thinking people | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. " Why not? We aren't the type to introduce to family? | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. Why not? We aren't the type to introduce to family? " Cos we're the girls his mother warned him about - good for a shag but not to marry | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. Why not? We aren't the type to introduce to family? Cos we're the girls his mother warned him about - good for a shag but not to marry " Oh that's the one, I forgot, all us wanton harlots should just bend over and keep our slutty selves hidden away. | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. Why not? We aren't the type to introduce to family? Cos we're the girls his mother warned him about - good for a shag but not to marry Oh that's the one, I forgot, all us wanton harlots should just bend over and keep our slutty selves hidden away. " Madonna vs whore complex seriously what is it with men on here? Women who enjoy sex will obviously bring shame to their lives | |||
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"I stupidly let my wife see men on her own as initially it turned me on. She has grown attached to a cpl of them she sees. I'd rather she didnt see them but says they are her normal friends now and it would be controlling of me to stop her." Well when you use phrases like “let my wife”, there’s a chance you may already be controlling her. Surely you “agreed”?? | |||
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"I stupidly let my wife see men on her own as initially it turned me on. She has grown attached to a cpl of them she sees. I'd rather she didnt see them but says they are her normal friends now and it would be controlling of me to stop her. Well when you use phrases like “let my wife”, there’s a chance you may already be controlling her. Surely you “agreed”?? " Semantics surely? Once swinging fun starts to become less fun for others involved... Something needs to change. Whatever words are used. | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. Why not? We aren't the type to introduce to family? Cos we're the girls his mother warned him about - good for a shag but not to marry Oh that's the one, I forgot, all us wanton harlots should just bend over and keep our slutty selves hidden away. Madonna vs whore complex seriously what is it with men on here? Women who enjoy sex will obviously bring shame to their lives " These may be the men who then cheat on their wives cos of a number of reasons. | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. " Maybe put that on your profile to avoid confusion. | |||
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"I’ve had to have a couple of quite frank conversations with two single ladies in the past on here; I think they’d both been treated badly in the past and thought that someone sane (ish), who treated them respectfully and enjoyed their company was their knight in shining armour. Personally I separate ‘fab life’ from real life and like to keep it like that, I cannot envisage entering into a proper relationship with someone from here. Why not? We aren't the type to introduce to family? Cos we're the girls his mother warned him about - good for a shag but not to marry Oh that's the one, I forgot, all us wanton harlots should just bend over and keep our slutty selves hidden away. Madonna vs whore complex seriously what is it with men on here? Women who enjoy sex will obviously bring shame to their lives " I got heavily critised for my profile, saying it entices the perverts. I did an experiment with other women. we all re-created our profiles into really naughty ones. I got nothing but really nice messages, where my other friend got absolutely vile. Her profile was less naughtier than mine. | |||
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"I know the massive turn on of letting your wife see guys alone. But there is a big risk as i found out. We ok now and i long for it again but she unsure as it does hurt emotionally when it ends Unless I end my marriage I'm pretty much stuck with the situation now Why stop her if its working? It doesn't do anything for me now. Made me loose my confidence really Why is she still doing it if its hurting you? You're her primary partner Because he changed the rules, it's not all about the men ! I know that but if I knew I was hurting someone I loved I'd stop doing whatever it was. I'd say the same to a woman. " | |||
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"Or you just don't get emotionally attached that easily? " This for me | |||
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