FabSwingers.com forum: How soon is too soon?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok, tough one this, and been doing some reading as thought it was just me, but other people go through it,

My Wife, passed away 4 weeks ago, and due to her illness our sex life was non existent for over a year.

Now, all I am longing for is some intimacy, i am human who has been missing this. I am not looking for a relationship by any means.

What do people think, what if you were approached by someone?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

firstly I'm very sorry for your loss.

I think that intimacy is a something we all need and you aren't any different. I would be very wary if you approached us because we couldn't offer you what you need.

I hope you can find what you need

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Ok, tough one this, and been doing some reading as thought it was just me, but other people go through it,

My Wife, passed away 4 weeks ago, and due to her illness our sex life was non existent for over a year.

Now, all I am longing for is some intimacy, i am human who has been missing this. I am not looking for a relationship by any means.

What do people think, what if you were approached by someone?

Sorry for your loss. Hope you are ok?

I would be very wary if I was ‘approached’ by someone in this respect.

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By *ornyhappyCouple
over a year ago

perth

Sorry for your loss OP.

Craving physical touch & intimacy is actually a very common part of grieving for many people. How you are feeling is very normal & only you can determine the timescale of your journey.

The problem is that you will also be extremely fragile emotionally. A lot of people are scared of grief, they just don't know how to handle it, & that will make them wary.

I hope you can find someone understanding who will help you.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

Condolonces from me too.

Firstly go through the grieving process, then concentrate on your mental health, before jumping into bed with a new play mate.

Talking and hugs are really great when used in combination. Sadly the NHS only offers talking therapy, it's the hugs that are harder to find.

If you do meet someone, tell them upfront, as this will take the sting away, little by little.

Good luck and here's to getting through, this strange and dark time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not the same as what your going through even slightly but when me and my ex broke up it was very messy and I felt almost like she had died I deffinatly grieved for her and part of that was finding comfort in having sex with randomers to make my self feel wanted and better, it does not work and it wasn't a very healthy option mentaly amd if I could go back in time I wouldn't have done it and would have tackled it in a very different way. I know that what I want through was absaloutly nothing like what you are going through but my advice is to try and deal with the grief slowly deffiently no rush and try not to find comfort in sex it doesn't work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry for your loss.

When my partner died it was awful, yes I wanted human contact and intimacy but when I was in the position to actually do it I couldn't. Take you're time, be honest with yourself and anyone whom does come into your life in that aspect. You will know when you are ready

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