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un attractive....

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester

so a bit of a back story.

I met my ex when I was 22 and he was 40 (yes I know... and no there are no daddy issues lol he just drew me in somehow) we had an amazing sex life and he introduced me to swinging (I was so vanilla before hand I hadn't even heard of swinging!)

we were together for 3 yrs but split up due to infidelity (yeah why cheat when you can swing, I didn't get it either)

so I stayed on this site and spoke to many people and also had a few flings along the way but nothing serious.

I just got to the point of thinking I'll be forever a single swinger when I met my now husband at 31. he isn't into the scene so I stopped coming on here and my life carried on. 2 kids down the line and I felt un attractive as he doesn't show me very much attention unless on his terms. I came back on here and I feel like I should never have left!

the issue I'm having is I could never cheat (I feel like thats what I'd be doing as he has no knowledge of this) I have also reconnected with someone I knew many years ago (he isn't a swinger I don't think) he's having issues with his wife and our conversations are very sexual....

here's my dilemma do I just carry on chatting and flirting etc (which is what my head tells me to do) or do I do more which is what my pussy is constantly telling me to do when chatting with him or reading the stories on here

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester

Have you tried talking to your hubby about the way you are feeling?

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester

I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester


"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol "

I don't know whether skirting around the subject is the best way maybe a proper full on discussion about the way you are feeling and what you'd like but if he isn't willing to listen but I can understand the way you are feeling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol "

Just get it out of your system

If you don’t like it then put it down as an experience

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester


" "

I just hope you can get it sorted out

Also very nice piccy btw

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By *ast Living Risk TakerMan
over a year ago

Frodsham

It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly!

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester


"

I just hope you can get it sorted out

Also very nice piccy btw "

thanks

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester


"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! "
that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester


"

I just hope you can get it sorted out

Also very nice piccy btw

thanks "

No need

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??"

Or look at it as a guilty pleasure ??

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By *ast Living Risk TakerMan
over a year ago

Frodsham


"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??"

Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester


"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??

Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt "

wish I could live with it but I know I couldn't ?????

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By *ast Living Risk TakerMan
over a year ago

Frodsham


"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??

Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt

wish I could live with it but I know I couldn't ?????"

I'd forget about it then and carry on as you are. Enjoy the thoughts, but just don't take it any further

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester


"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??

Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt

wish I could live with it but I know I couldn't ?????

I'd forget about it then and carry on as you are. Enjoy the thoughts, but just don't take it any further "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you can't live with the guilt then maybe you should stop talking to the other guy? Too much temptation x

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester


"If you can't live with the guilt then maybe you should stop talking to the other guy? Too much temptation x"

that's what I'm starting to think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol "

Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing

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By *ohnny4playMan
over a year ago

Kinross


"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol

Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing "

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By *entShyMan
over a year ago

Kent


"If you can't live with the guilt then maybe you should stop talking to the other guy? Too much temptation x

that's what I'm starting to think "

Cold turkey is the only way i reckon. Cut the link = cut the temptation hopefully.

As to talking to your hubby, i might be wrong but i reckon he would be up for it in the right circumstances and right preperation?

Maybe try mff first (if you can) and get him used to the idea.

Or something less intense - take a weekend break away and do some people watching. Go on a date, open up, make it fun. Suggest people you see who you think he would go for. Sow the seed in his head. Make it fun with no pressure. Dont even mention mmf. Just enjoy each other for a weekend and build on from that.

If he is up for mff, he can be persuaded to more. I would be the same i think but i would be more open to the idea if it was away from home and was a nsa thing.

Probably doesnt help you, sorry

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By *avyboy7Man
over a year ago

Barnstaple

If you are unhappy in your marriage then I would split with your husband and divorce and do whatever you like after that xx

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By *ilberryMan
over a year ago

Scarborough


"If you can't live with the guilt then maybe you should stop talking to the other guy? Too much temptation x

that's what I'm starting to think "

Talk to him etc, and just use your finger-a lot less drama

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester

thanks guys some really helpful ideas x

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By *ossauMan
over a year ago

Perth


"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol

Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing "

This is the crux of the matter - how he treats you. He is a selfish lover in that it is his terms. This is the discussion you have, he needs to see that you have needs/wants/desires too. To say yes to ffm and no to mmf highlights the selfishness.

Ditch the old flame, have that chat and see what you can sort out. Good luck.

Ps. Pics are wonderful, you'll have them queueing up if he doesn't see sense. Joe x

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By *kyblue2681 OP   Woman
over a year ago

manchester


"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol

Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing

This is the crux of the matter - how he treats you. He is a selfish lover in that it is his terms. This is the discussion you have, he needs to see that you have needs/wants/desires too. To say yes to ffm and no to mmf highlights the selfishness.

Ditch the old flame, have that chat and see what you can sort out. Good luck.

Ps. Pics are wonderful, you'll have them queueing up if he doesn't see sense. Joe x"
thankyou

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