 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
As I lay there in the bed, with Marilynn, sleeping next to me, I tried to figure out how this had happened.
To understand things, you have to go back 30 years, at the time I was working as a DJ in a local night club.
Great for picking up women, for a 17 year old, well, if you were not as shy as I was around women, it would be the perfect job.
Every week, a group of girls would come into the club, I would chat with them, but one in particular had caught my attention, after about 6 months, I knew I was in love, but did not have the nerve to let her know.
Jump forward 3 years, my best friend is getting married, I and my girlfriend are invited to the wedding, I had been working abroad, in for an agency, and had not spent much time in the UK, and had never met his bride to be.
The day of the wedding arrived, the church was filled to the gills, hats and frocks everywhere, we took a seat at the back of the church, the service commenced, the bride looked beautiful in her silk and lace, then I say her face and my heart skipped a beat, and then was broken, there in front of me, was the girl from the club, just become the wife of my best friend.
Over the years that followed, I myself married became god father to my friends children, all the time wanting to tell her that I was in love with her, but never wanting to rock the boat. We holidayed together, had house parties at Christmas and bonfire night, and yet even though she was out of reach, the spark still burned.
Skip 15 years
Over time my marriage broke down, and I was single again, my friend and his wife took me under their wing, cooking me dinners, inviting me out so I was not alone, little did she know how alone I felt, but did not want to cut off contact with her, I thought it was just a rebound thing.
I dated, on and off, but resigned myself to the fact that I would never find anyone who could and would fill the empty spot that was in my heart.
Eventually I moved away with my job, started a new life, new friends, and lost contact with a lot of people from my old life.
I remarried, but my heart could never be truly anybodies,
Jump 12 years.
I received an invitation to a wedding in the city where I grew up, , I made arrangements, booked a hotel, and off I went, the same church as I had been to 30 years before, some of the same people, at the reception I chatted with old friends and mingled with the crowd, I felt a bit like Norman No Mates and was not going to stay that long after the dinner, then I saw her, my heart raced, by breath shortened, She still looked as beautiful as she had 30 years ago, time had been good to her, even after 3 children she had still retained her figure, I felt like I had to hide, but her son, Bobby spotted me, Hey mum isnt that uncle Michael, that is what they used to call me all those years ago, shit I thought, looking for a quick way out, my face flushing with embracement, but there was nowhere to go.
I could not believe that after so long, the feeling of complete and utter love, still burned in my heart for this woman.
We chatted, talked about this and that, who and what we were doing, my eyes found it difficult to keep eye contact because I knew I would be lost forever.
Dinner was served, I was glad to be able to escape, and thought that I would leave after the formalities had been completed.
The wine flowed, then the champagne, then the brandy by the end of the meal I was on my way to being very d*unk, thats when it happened, my brain switched off and my mouth went into overdrive. I blurted it out, the secret I had kept locked away for 30 years, I was in love with Marilynn and always had been, from the first day I saw her in the night club.
Suddenly something else in my brain said oops, dont think you should have said that, and I made my apologies and made a sharp exit to my room as quickly as I could, ashamed at the fact I had let slip my true feeling.
In the comfort and safety of my hotel room, my mind began to come back into focus and I realized what I had done, I would never be able to look at her again and not be embarrassed.
About an hour later there was a knock on my door, groggy from the drink I opened the door, and there she stood, the glint of a tear in her eye, my heat pounded, my stomach tightened, oh shit I thought, she knows, someone told her.
Can I come in she asked, it took a second for it to register as my mind had gone blank and my throat dried up err yes sure I stepped out of the way and let her in to the room. look, I blurted what I said out there, well it was just the drink, but she knew, she could see that it was true, she had known me for 30 years, I think she said, I have always known, she stepped close to me, I could smell her perfume, she was now close enough for me to feel her warmth, then she kissed me, gentle but longing.
It seem so strange to me know, that two people can go through life not knowing that they are meant to be together, until it is almost too late, and how fate can deal you a hand that brings you back to where you started
This story does not have a fairy tale ending, we spent one night together and although I will alway carry a torch for her, I know in my heart it can never be
|
