FabSwingers.com forum: How long would you wait

By *exyforeigners OP Couple
over a year ago

LONDON / ESSEX

Just curious how long you would wait for someone to show up at the agreed venue before you decided to leave because they were late?

We don't often meet single men but we finally found a good looking guy that the Mrs was attracted to and we agreed to meet at a bar for drinks. He only wanted to meet in the area right where he lived which didn't suit us because that is where our friends lived that we had told we were staying at home and couldn't join them for a night out.

Eventually we gave in and met him at a bar close to his house that suited him but was on the other side of town for us. We waited at the bar for 45 minutes which we think is very reasonable (especially since he lives close by), and decided we would leave when he hadn't arrived.

I thought the important 'rules' of this lifestyle was to always make the female feel comfortable 1.) Let her chose a venue where she is most comfortable 2.) Be punctual, this shows respect

If someone keeps changing the venue and you agree to meet at a place they chose then the decent thing would to do would at least arrive on time. 10-15 minutes late is acceptable, 15 - 30 if you live in London

but 45 minutes, no!

Apologies that this isn't an exciting topic but may be something for single guys to understand when meeting couples.

We would love to hear peoples thoughts or similar experiences ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they dont show on time then we leave straight away...............

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By *teve261970Man
over a year ago

Gateshead

"Just curious how long you would wait for someone to show up at the agreed venue before you decided to leave because they were late?

I thought the important 'rules' of this lifestyle was to always make the female feel comfortable 1.) Let her chose a venue where she is most comfortable 2.) Be punctual, this shows respect

but 45 minutes, no!

Apologies that this isn't an exciting topic but may be something for single guys to understand when meeting couples.

We would love to hear peoples thoughts or similar experiences ..."

As single man I always turn up early in my experience a first meet is similar to a job interview. You turn up early and prepare before hand, always aware that you might not get to fill the position

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By *exyforeigners OP Couple
over a year ago

LONDON / ESSEX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

15 minutes max, maybe 30 if I was super duper horny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally inexcusable.

One should never keep a lady waiting.

Unless of course she is in the bedroom and being teased...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Judging by your profile what an absolute fool to not bother turning up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Punctuality shows to the couple a keen interest in them.

Messing about with venues is a pain in the backside, as for how long you wait..............

Through my life I've always had a '15 minute early' philosophy for everything done. And I always allowed 15 minutes if I was waiting for someone before calling to see if everything was ok.

We give people we meet the same courtesy, 15 minutes to allow for unexpected delays etc. we'd then call to see if everything was ok, no answer then it's time to go home.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

Unless there is a call or text to state otherwise, 10-15mins is the maximum we will wait - and I think that's being generous.

We wouldn't have agreed to meet someone who showed no sign of compromise anyway but it's just one of those things, you live and learn.

- Amy. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would turn up early. I always think its rude to keep someone waiting. I would make allowances for traffic etc. I have waited 30 minutes plus, if they text me they are still on their way. The last two meets, both fems were on time, as was i.

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By *ncorMan
over a year ago

Ipswich

Being late is not an option. Always early, as said, as if a job interview. Survey the location, be relaxed, not smelling of booze.

Natural and everyone is happy, not on edge. In my opinion.

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By *peedypeteMan
over a year ago

derby

I am always on time, usually arrive at venue early to make sure I dont let folks down. Andy delay I always text to keep others informed, but rarely happened.

Courtesy isn't expensive but reckon its always appreciated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it."

The terms should be mutually agreeable no one should have to work for it.

In answer to op we would wait until we had finished our drink then leave.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

Sounds like he bottled it for one reaon or another.. Happens a lot... Often when they realise how they have changed since the pics they showed you and that it takes nerve to show up knowing you will realise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always confirm the details of the meet on the day before I go anywhere.

That will deter most time wasters if I got to the place I would wait 20 mins if I had not heard anything I would leave.

I won't agree to meet anyone without a phone number that way if a problem arises they can let you know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it."

That would make me suspicious straight away. It's a meet you are not doing the guy a favour.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it.

That would make me suspicious straight away. It's a meet you are not doing the guy a favour."

Yep, my point exactly! If we meet a single man we try and meet half way, it's a mutually agreed thing and no one has any right to call all the shots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it.

That would make me suspicious straight away. It's a meet you are not doing the guy a favour.

Yep, my point exactly! If we meet a single man we try and meet half way, it's a mutually agreed thing and no one has any right to call all the shots. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We would expect any male to have some respect and courtesy where a lady is concerned for obvious reasons namely safety , should have binned him off from the start !!!! Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Single guys should cater to the needs of the cpl , And NEVER be late ,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it."

absolutely agree, as a single guy, I would expect to meet on the lady or couples terms and I would be there early. If I was running late for any reason, there would be a phone call or text to let them.know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it.

The text or the phone call goes without saying. Why would you expect to meet on their terms?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Never arrange to meet a single guy on his terms, make him travel to you.

If he is keen he will show, remember its your lady he wants to shag so make him work for it.

Would you? We expect cooperation obviously and equal effort but we aren't here to set ourselves up as better than one section of the fab membership.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

15 min id wait only but thats only because im polite and usually 5/10 min early to everything haha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm always late, on the odd occasion I'm early.

But if I am late then I call or txt. My last meet waited 45 minutes for me. Was a last minute thing but we're glad he did. Though if he had finished his coffee he would have been out that door I reckon which is fair enough. Very glad he's a slow drinker

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By *ornyandwellhungMan
over a year ago

belfast

Turning up late without calling is very disrespectful. It's disrespectful to be late at all, but a call or an apology could save your reputation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By the looks of your mrs, he's a fool for

Not showing never mind keeping you waiting and for not msg saying some sort of crap excuse like my budgie died

Don't let him put you off meeting single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

iv travelled quite far and been stood up. one couple said they had to dash emergency and i could clearly see them in the front room lol. i paid for a Hilton hotel once for a lady, flowers and wine. she kept texting every 10 mins it was wont be long, wont be long and eventually sorry somethings come up.

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By *he TrunkMan
over a year ago

Manchester

OP, looking at your profile and pics, I wouldn't hang around longer than a fortnight waiting for you guys

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By *AM2214Man
over a year ago

Manchester Area

"Unless there is a call or text to state otherwise, 10-15mins is the maximum we will wait - and I think that's being generous.

We wouldn't have agreed to meet someone who showed no sign of compromise anyway but it's just one of those things, you live and learn.

- Amy. x"
looking to say I agree but you have blocked all men which might limit your fun :

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By *AM2214Man
over a year ago

Manchester Area

Sorry to say this but hopefully the message is read and understood

If you arrange to meet then surely you have a moral duty to meet, if something comes up then for God's sake (insert deity) it's not hard in this World to text or email someone?

Guy on my verifications was amazed I said can we meet for coffee only -short break- I had tried to meet him for ages and it annoyed me, thankfully he was patient forgiving and understanding which led to some mutual fun which will be repeated at least.

Make the arrangement make the meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unless there is a call or text to state otherwise, 10-15mins is the maximum we will wait - and I think that's being generous.

We wouldn't have agreed to meet someone who showed no sign of compromise anyway but it's just one of those things, you live and learn.

- Amy. x looking to say I agree but you have blocked all men which might limit your fun :"

Or maybe they message the guys that interest them to avoid having their inbox filled to bursting with hordes of single men? Or maybe they're not meeting at the moment and have stopped all contact?

crystal

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

"looking to say I agree but you have blocked all men which might limit your fun :"

Actually we have blocked EVERYONE as, as our profile clearly states, we're not meeting at the moment. - Crystal Wheels hit the nail on the head for you there.

- Amy. x

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By *exyforeigners OP Couple
over a year ago

LONDON / ESSEX

Thank you to everyone for their comments, it is much appreciated.

Just to clarify we did text the guy twice during our 45 minute wait and when he still hadn't arrived we left. As we left the bar he then sent a text notifying us that he had arrived. We didn't bother replying as we feel we were messed around enough with venue issues and him being very late, and didn't want to entertain a dialogue when we had already made up our minds.

We thought we would send him a message on Fab the next day but he had blocked us. It's a shame because there are some decent guys out there but when something like this happens it just makes us stick to meeting couples and single females as this has never been an issue.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

"Thank you to everyone for their comments, it is much appreciated.

Had you seen this guy on cam or was it only pictures?

And was he well verified? x

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By *exyforeigners OP Couple
over a year ago

LONDON / ESSEX

He was well verified with a satisfactory amount of meets with couples and females that show on the left of the profile page, but didn't display all of them at the bottom that have the meet description...

...which now makes us wonder what all those said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He was well verified with a satisfactory amount of meets with couples and females that show on the left of the profile page, but didn't display all of them at the bottom that have the meet description...

...which now makes us wonder what all those said"

Unfortunately verifications only show the potential meet was nice to other people. No guarantee he will be good with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just curious how long you would wait for someone to show up at the agreed venue before you decided to leave because they were late?

I thought the important 'rules' of this lifestyle was to always make the female feel comfortable 1.) Let her chose a venue where she is most comfortable 2.) Be punctual, this shows respect

but 45 minutes, no!

Apologies that this isn't an exciting topic but may be something for single guys to understand when meeting couples.

We would love to hear peoples thoughts or similar experiences ..."

I have never had this issue but i would give it enough time to finish a drink

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that the OP was overly generous and compromising and also think that the man in question was out of order in his lack of flexibility and respect.

That said some of the comments are pretty sad in that some people seem to feel that it is acceptable for a couple or female to call the shots and that their every whim should be catered for. Seriously I would never jump through hoops. Compromise is a 2 way process

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think that the OP was overly generous and compromising and also think that the man in question was out of order in his lack of flexibility and respect.

Some single guys should have a category at Crufts

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By *regboy49Man
over a year ago

Sandhurst

Phone or text if you even think your going to be late. I'd wait 15/20 minutes tops. I'd rather be 10 minutes early at wait than be late.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guy must have been off his nut to miss out on you guys

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