FabSwingers.com forum: My fantasty

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Im reaaly interested in been a sub for a dom... Now i have never done it before so any tips n how to get started !?"

This is a couple profile so I'd be interested to know whether its the male or female half of the couple that's posting and whether you're looking within the relationship or outside.

That said, this advice applies to either. Firstly, there is a lot of trust involved so don't be in a rush to hand yourself over to somebody who might take things too far.

Also, have a safe word, I use amber and red, where amber is I'm not sure/take it easy and red is stop right now, no questions. After all, you may choose for no to mean yes and your dom needs to know where he or she stands.

Where a lot of people fall down is that an inexperienced dom will just go steaming in and do what THEY like. It's the sub that should always set the boundaries of play though so think about what you want to try and to what extent.

I'd take a trip to Camden (in the arches used to have the best fet clothing shops...tell them you're new to the scene and they'll look after you. Then try somewhere like Club Subversion in your new clobber and likewise, let somebody know you're new to the scene. Provided you're friendly and not intrusive, you wont find any problems finding a dom or couple to take you under their wing for a while until you find your feet. It really is super friendly there!

Don't perv in the dungeons though or try and get involved in somebody elses experience, its generally frowned upon.

Good luck though in your exploration! You'll meet some great people and its not at all seedy, despite the odd funny look when people ask where you were the weekend hehe

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Im the female n i want other females to dominate me "

Cool well everything I suggested still applies. The only thing I'd reinforce is to try and find an experienced dom to start with before finding somebody you connect with and build trust with.

You say you want females, plural, to dominate you so have a think about whether you want multiple experiences with different women or to find one dom to submit fully to. In my experience, the trust you can build up in time with one person will make for a richer experience for you, but everybody's different.

A resident dom at a fet club is still the best place to start in my opinion. They'll show you the ropes so to speak

and maybe introduce you to somebody too.

Again, good luck!