I don't know if this script idea will be made if they ever resurrect this iconic seventies sitcom, but here goes.
***
* Tom comes in from the garden holding a parsnip that has grown into the shape of an enormous penis. *
Barbara : My god!
Tom : I know!
Barbara : It looks just like a...
Tom : I know, I was just thinking that myself!
Barbara : A huge penis?
Tom : Well, quite... just like that one you had inside last week at that party Jerry and Margot threw.
Barbara : Oh, yes, I thought it reminded of someone.
Tom : What was name again?
Barbara : Colin, Karl.. someone like that. It was huge though!
Tom : I remember. I remember thinking, "I wonder if Bab's poor little fanny is going to stretch enough to get all that in!"
* Both laugh while looking at huge parsnip in Tom's hand. *
Barbara : I've an idea!
Tom : What is it?
Barbara : You know we have Jerry and Margot coming over later?
Tom : Yes. For dinner. I am making them my special. Leek stew.
Barbara : Yes. And very nice is it too. But what if we offered them a side dish.
Tom : A side dish?
Barbara : Yes. You know, like they do in those fancy places down in the town centre on Surbiton high street.
Tom : I think I know what you mean. What were you thinking?
Barbara : Well, that thing in your hand of course.
Tom : You mean this? Parsnip?
Barbara : No, not just parsnip. Not just like that.
Tom : I don't get you. What do you mean?
Barbara : Well, if we gave it some glaze, for example?
* Tom looks at Barbara with a squint *
Tom : Are you thinking what I am thinking?
Barbara : I don't know. What are you thinking?
Tom : That you want to use this parsnip to get off with and cover in your 'glaze' as you call it, and then offer it up for our guests this evening!
* Barbara lifts her finger to her lip and looks coy *
Tom : Right! We'll do it. Get those dungarees down and I'll give it a quick wash.
Barbara : * Giggles * Oh, good! I thought you would enjoy it!
* Barbara strips out of her dungarees and sits on their kitchen table with her thighs apart, propped up on her elbows *
Barbara : Make sure it's not too cold! I don't want to jump when you slide it in.
Tom : I wouldn't be worried about how hot or cold it is, this thing is a MONSTER! Are you sure you don't want me to, you know, give it a trim, peel it or something?
Barbara : Why of course not, now bring it over here.
* Barbara holds her pussy lips apart and Tom takes his place between his wife's wide open legs and takes in her glorious trimmed but very bushy cunt before brandishing the vegetable ready for action * |
