I wrote this at the darkest time.. I;ve found it resonates with some.. and they relate.
This is my own work, its been published and is registered as my interlectual property.
The Monster from the ID
I yell into the night..
towards the void with all of my might..
trying to find the key, to unlock...
the doors of the prison,
that hold all the socks..
The monster within,
yearns to be free,
The power I have is dwindling to nil,
It seems to escape me,
rampage it seeks,
hurt and desire, its triumph delights
as it stalks its prey in the night.
The way is so dark,
I see no escape,
the light has gone out,
never to wake..
Where am I going, which way do I turn,
all for naught as the monster returns.
It smashes my head, breaks all my bones,
Only to laugh as I lie and moan.
My bodies desire is to sleep as I tire
Yet my mind it still leaps in its search for desire
I banish the thoughts, that stop me from sleeping,
only to find them back in my head they are creeping..
I turn over and lie, in a position more comfy,
sleep still eludes me no matter the peace
My mind still returns to the face I adore
The eyes ever searching,
for something I'm not,
That hard cased monster, you think you forgot.
He lurks still behind my eyes as I speak,
his influence grows, each day I grow weak.
How soon he breaks free, I just dont know..
How long can I hang on, to his chains in this place
My strengths almost gone,
he quickens his pace.
God help the fellow, who catches his wrath.
I defo wouldnt want to be in his path.
He growls and he screams,
he punches and ch0kes,
the angrier he seems, to many a bloke
He rips and he shreds,
whomever he sees
Like a titan from old, he screams his defiance,
Zeus and Apollo are impotent at his violence.
The words on the page,
help settle and cage,
The beast it rises,
when some here do say,
"you cant do that here"
"not here, that way"
"goodbye, you are nutz" they shout and they spray
They go and they take their hatred away,
"Fuck them, I dont need them" I say
But it hurts all the same,
when friends go their way,
saying I'm crazy..
What do they want, for me just to lie,
say I'm ok, and pretend not to die?
This outlet I have, for me to control..
out pour my thoughts, my feelings, my souls.
The monster within,
is beaten back still,
when I scream and shout on with words on a page
his anger and rage
at things he cant read,
his understanding is limited
to mindless violence and greed....
He stalks thru my head looking for cracks..
his hand reaches out,
never to touch,
but too punch
and to grab,
his anger defines,
his life up to date,
in his small confines..
He wants more, more than I give..
Takes what he wants,
and leaves me a husk..
This monster inside.... this ID from the ego
I try to surpress,
You all think I'm niceness and cuddly,
but dont mess..
I'll rip your head off and shit down the hole..
just beware the buttons you press..
This warning I give, the time is not right..
The monster is waiting,
lurking to fight..
beware, those that want to be friends
it will rip and kick, and tear out your souls..
its taken mine, and torn it to shreds,
The strength it posses beats mine no contest,
I'm tired and i'm wearied at fighting so long,
"No more please, you win, just leave"
I cry and I cry, tears of pain,
but no one ever sees, so I cry in vane
My heart is too big,
it worries for others,
ignore its own pain,
it might go away,
Never will, never does,
I'm always the same..
hurt and alone, in a corner I stay..
Til the monster calls me to play....................
This is my own work, its been published and is registered as my interlectual property.
|
as a fellow sufferer
