FabSwingers.com forum: The common slug ...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The common slug is a small, gastropod mollusc that lacks a shell.

Met any yet?

The slug (pulmanota ... Pul-ma-no-ta)

The soft, slimy bodies of slugs are prone to disatisfaction, so land-living slugs are confined to moist environments and must retreat to damp hiding places, or at least think about it until they ejaculate.

Most slugs have pairs of 'feelers' or testicles on their head.

a slug moves by rhythmic waves of muscular contraction known to others as wanking.

It simultaneously secretes a layer of mucus then deletes it's own or has it's own profile deleted.

Once a slug has located a prospective mate, they harass constantly until sperm is ejaculated through their protruded genitalia ....

... onto their keyboard.

Slugs, when attacked, can contract, making themselves harder and more compact, and combined with the slippery mucus are more difficult to grasp. The unpleasant taste of the mucus is also a deterrent.

The great majority of slug species are harmless to humans and to their interests, but a small number of species are serious pests of hornyculture.

It is unknown how they evolved to set up profiles, yet not acquire the ability to read others nor the ability to recall having sent short, crappy messages in the past .... and often getting deleted before the messages have been read ...

Do you have a slug in your box? are you being driven out of your mind by a plague of slugs? Do you wash and care for a slug? does your slug think for you?

have you looked down and thought ... you know what ... this slug has got to go ... ?

May all yer cabbage patch and lady gardens blossom and thrive without the intrusion of any unwanted slugs ...

Alan Titsmatch

xxx xxx

By *unstuffMan
over a year ago

North Cumbria/Edinburgh

Very well written and said my dears...

I personally find a good Slug repellent in the block button, but they do seem to continue to invade my inbox with stupid slimy trails such like, " Sry to hassle,but can I see your private pics" or " can I come around and suck and go" to which I find A size 10 boot like answer is enough" ERR, NO..Fuck off!!" tends to do the trick.

I do understand some people are more pestered more so by these slimy invertebrate and to those I sympathize greatly.

In short, the hideous creatures that you refer to will just keep coming back, but it just A matter of of kicking them in the gluteus maximus when they show there ugly faces..

Good luck..

Funstuff