FabSwingers.com forum: Let's see who's brave enough to be honest

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you before, during or after sex????

Let's have some fun, no judgements, no nasty opinions or comments. Just some fun to brighten up someone's day.

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By *wisted VinylMan
over a year ago

Fife

banjo string pingage. not that bad really but made a mess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

no no no no NO

Shivers there lol

I think for us it was Mrs totally soaking a cpls bed as we were using the big wand ... honestly like a swimming pool , luckily they had a rubber sheet below

Never seen anything like it before or since

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some... heavy petting... during the climax of House of Flying Daggers at the Showcase Cinema, Paisley ending with a spurt unleashed on the two rows in front of us. There was some head turning but we styled it out and no questions were asked.

Left in a hurry, but couldn't find the car as tears were streaming down our faces with laughter.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"banjo string pingage. not that bad really but made a mess"

Ouch

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

no no no no NO

Shivers there lol

I think for us it was Mrs totally soaking a cpls bed as we were using the big wand ... honestly like a swimming pool , luckily they had a rubber sheet below

Never seen anything like it before or since

Brilliant

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Some... heavy petting... during the climax of House of Flying Daggers at the Showcase Cinema, Paisley ending with a spurt unleashed on the two rows in front of us. There was some head turning but we styled it out and no questions were asked.

Left in a hurry, but couldn't find the car as tears were streaming down our faces with laughter. "

That's embarrassingly funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure it's embarrassing but it could have been... got locked into the Botanic Gardens with a fabfriend one night... we managed to escape Indiana Jones style or it might have been very embarrassing explaining why we were oblivious to the park closing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not sure it's embarrassing but it could have been... got locked into the Botanic Gardens with a fabfriend one night... we managed to escape Indiana Jones style or it might have been very embarrassing explaining why we were oblivious to the park closing

Haha! I was also going to post about the Botanic Gardens!! I had an impromptu social there a while back which turned into more.. with an appreciative audience, it turned out

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By *andy_FraserTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Not embarrassing for me, but it was for the woman I was with.

She went down on me, literally seconds after she'd taken a condom off me that had a numbing lubricant on it.

20 seconds later she was mumbling and asked for a drink, which she then couldn't keep in her mouth. Yep, her mouth was numb, and was for about 10 minutes afterwards.

We had a good laugh about it later though.

Mandy

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By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

Slipped in the shower. Landed in between the bath tub and wall. This was after a group session as well, so everyone heard it and came to see what was happening to find me in a very unflattering position on the floor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going for a drive a number of years ago with my mate and two willing young ladies

One had her lips around my full length whilst my mate was balls deep in her mate.

Swerved to miss a ewe and her lambs and mounted the embankment. Teeth marks went away after a few days but my mate broke his pelvis.

Funny watching him in hospital squirm when his wife and daughter cane to see him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha! I was also going to post about the Botanic Gardens!! I had an impromptu social there a while back which turned into more.. with an appreciative audience, it turned out

Haha!! Brilliant!

My bed broke

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By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

Haha! I was also going to post about the Botanic Gardens!! I had an impromptu social there a while back which turned into more.. with an appreciative audience, it turned out

Haha!! Brilliant!

My bed broke

My bed broke on more than one occasion

I've now invested in better quality bed and so far it's doing great!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After enjoying an Afternoon MMF with an established couple they proceeded to have a full blown domestic about who was getting invited over for the next one....all of us still in a state of undress!!!! Awkward doesn’t begin to describe it and I couldn’t get out of there quick enough.

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow

I’m just looking for a lady who’s honest enough to be brave .

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

You know the jewel part at one end of a silicone butt plug. Well that popped out and the butt plug slid straight up. Brief panic thinking it would turn into a trip to a&e but managed to retrieve it all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After a good session with a rather vocal young lady I was confronted by an elderly neighbour who absolutly afronted both of us the next morning on the street out side my flat. She was telling anybody who would listen that the noise was terrible and never stopped all night....we never spoke again funny enough....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know the jewel part at one end of a silicone butt plug. Well that popped out and the butt plug slid straight up. Brief panic thinking it would turn into a trip to a&e but managed to retrieve it all. "

Haha this whole thread is crying out due "pics or didn't happen"

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By *asterslittlewhoreCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Also lost a metal jewelled but plug.....things you dont want to hear while fucking.....uhoh

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By *asterslittlewhoreCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Also lost a metal jewelled but plug.....things you dont want to hear while fucking.....uhoh "

*butt

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By *bostCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

Was a bit too vigorous while on top of Mr Pf. Almost snapped his cock in half. The bruising eventaully went away

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By *wisted VinylMan
over a year ago

Fife

"After a good session with a rather vocal young lady I was confronted by an elderly neighbour who absolutly afronted both of us the next morning on the street out side my flat. She was telling anybody who would listen that the noise was terrible and never stopped all night....we never spoke again funny enough...."

Had a neighbour like this years ago.i offered her a pair of my old ear defenders she didnt see the funny side

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

Haha this whole thread is crying out due "pics or didn't happen"

We were actually in the middle of Instagram live at the time but ended/deleted the vid quickly

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

"Also lost a metal jewelled but plug.....things you dont want to hear while fucking.....uhoh "

Ha ha uhoh is the worst sex sound ever

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By *awaiianguyMan
over a year ago

East Ayrshire

Went mad once with the wine with a couple in the pub before heading back to theirs. Inevitable total failure, and easily the most embarrassing sexual episode I've ever had

. To this day I don't know why I sabotaged myself so completely

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/01/20 17:50:08]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/01/20 17:50:55]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

These are all brilliant, we have had a few ourselves, the one that keeps happening though is when we've been in a certain position

"sitting on hubby's face" , facing window and tweeking nipples and someone walks in. First time was when my brother he was 15 at time some time ago, barged through the door coz there was loud weird noise. Most recent was last year same position, door jammed shut and son 13 barged through door to wake me to tell us TV was too loud, we quickly grabbed duvet and made out I was looking out the window affronted and ashamed but we were hoping he didn't see anything as we were bloody quick to hide ourselves. The next day our oldest daughter 23 and son 21 came to visit and we were busted, son High fives hubby and I got big lecture from daughter telling me we are too old for that type of shit and to get a lock on door as we have scarred their baby brother for life. Teen son had called them up and grassed on us. Still can't get over it. It has not been brought up since but total cringe. We were defo the worst parents we now have lock in bedroom door

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We were defo the worst parents we now have lock in bedroom door

How you've managed to avoid social workers this long is beyond me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We were defo the worst parents we now have lock in bedroom door

How you've managed to avoid social workers this long is beyond me

I know, it only happened once and I'm still mortified

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hubby and I also try take time out and go for a wee drive and fun when we get spare hour, this time though we took my wee car instead of hubby's, the car our son sometimes borrows and is also known to his friends, so we headed out, parked in some industrial estate as teasing got too much and had to pull in to the nearest quietest darkest area, jumped in back and got all hot and steamy. Windows were that steamy that we couldn't see out and next minute 3 guys opened the door ready to jump in and were were exposed. Turns out son usually goes up to meet all his pals and they jump in and out each others cars checking out the new mods and stuff they have done to their cars. So these guys thought we were my son. My son and all his friends didn't keep it quiet

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Some of these are priceless. But sexmadcouple?! Really. Your children!

Pmsl.

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By *melfCouple
over a year ago

Stoneybridge

We had a amusing time when we briefly "lost" a strawberry... great fun retrieving it.

Not so funny the time a small anal vibe decided to go exploring all by itself. PANIC PANIC AND MORE PANIC.

oh how we still laugh about it now and only ever buy toys with an anchor attached.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the gf and I first started dating, her sister took a weekend break leaving her flat empty.

We had the keys and took advaof the empty home.

After a vigorous evening of a few hrs of fun, I headed home for work the following morning.

She called me around 1pm to tell me that the neighbour (mature single lady) had a lovely time listening to the ongoings and even had an after sex ciggy for our sake

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Some of these are priceless. But sexmadcouple?! Really. Your children!

Pmsl. "

Really trying to make me feel worse huh, I just needed to get it out to get rid of the guilt

in my defence, my teen is 6ft and walks heavy on his feet but that night he was a silent ninja. And older son wasn't there his pals were and they weren't kids. Does that make it better No but the shame haunts me.

Safe to say we are not the right couple to do dogging m we would no doubt get caught or even arrested.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When the gf and I first started dating, her sister took a weekend break leaving her flat empty.

We had the keys and took advaof the empty home.

After a vigorous evening of a few hrs of fun, I headed home for work the following morning.

She called me around 1pm to tell me that the neighbour (mature single lady) had a lovely time listening to the ongoings and even had an after sex ciggy for our sake

Ahh that was nice of the lady to have an after sex ciggie for you, some people are so considerate

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We had a amusing time when we briefly "lost" a strawberry... great fun retrieving it.

Not so funny the time a small anal vibe decided to go exploring all by itself. PANIC PANIC AND MORE PANIC.

oh how we still laugh about it now and only ever buy toys with an anchor attached.

Oh dear,

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay

A very close near miss.

Had a friend visit me in a hotel room, various acts had taken place with the lights out, but we'd finished with her sitting on my face.

We got up, she went to bathroom to freshen up, I got dressed, in the darkness.

We stepped out into corridor to head to the bar for a nightcap when she squealed.

It looked like I was a trauma victim as she's started her period without us noticing in the dark!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A very close near miss.

Had a friend visit me in a hotel room, various acts had taken place with the lights out, but we'd finished with her sitting on my face.

We got up, she went to bathroom to freshen up, I got dressed, in the darkness.

We stepped out into corridor to head to the bar for a nightcap when she squealed.

It looked like I was a trauma victim as she's started her period without us noticing in the dark!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A very close near miss.

Had a friend visit me in a hotel room, various acts had taken place with the lights out, but we'd finished with her sitting on my face.

We got up, she went to bathroom to freshen up, I got dressed, in the darkness.

We stepped out into corridor to head to the bar for a nightcap when she squealed.

It looked like I was a trauma victim as she's started her period without us noticing in the dark!"

Hahaha omg that's hilarious.

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By *apiensWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

"Not embarrassing for me, but it was for the woman I was with.

She went down on me, literally seconds after she'd taken a condom off me that had a numbing lubricant on it.

20 seconds later she was mumbling and asked for a drink, which she then couldn't keep in her mouth. Yep, her mouth was numb, and was for about 10 minutes afterwards.

We had a good laugh about it later though.

Mandy"

*numbing* lubricant? Why on gods name would someone invent that?! (Or is this a euphemism for something imperfectly legal?)

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Some of these are priceless. But sexmadcouple?! Really. Your children!

Pmsl.

Really trying to make me feel worse huh, I just needed to get it out to get rid of the guilt

Safe to say we are not the right couple to do dogging m we would no doubt get caught or even arrested.

Wasn’t meaning to rub it in and make you feel bad. TBH in a way it’s good that your children know that their parents are still expressing themselves sexually and actively. It’s more your bad luck I was chuckling at.

But the car invasion is classic. Probably helped your son’s street cred no end.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Some of these are priceless. But sexmadcouple?! Really. Your children!

Pmsl.

Really trying to make me feel worse huh, I just needed to get it out to get rid of the guilt

Safe to say we are not the right couple to do dogging m we would no doubt get caught or even arrested.

But the car invasion is classic. Probably helped your son’s street cred no end. "

I know you werent, we have laughed then cringe about it to ourselves.

I don't know he's the local machanic so prob had a few laughs about it with his pals , he's not one to be embarrassed more into bragging if anything lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He had pink hair and I try to never think about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just reminded myself of an incident in Edinburgh

I was out with a guy I was seeing during the fringe and I'd started new tablets, and it was hot hot hot, and I'd just been paid lol

Roll on several hours of drinking and we're both pissed as farts he decides to take me to a nice Italian restaurant for the best seafood risotto I'd ever taste!

Him and his family had been eating there all his life and knew the owners and staff very well

So he's sitting there across the table telling me all the naught things he's going to do to me back at his, well I kinda forgot myself got up out my seat pulled his chair out and straddled him In the restaurant which was packed and started snogging the face off him and got a round of applause and we both ended up rather sheepish when we realised how public the whole thing waslol

taxi drive back to his was also very Interesting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh I rear ended a fabber on our first social as well

Went for food and the manager came up during main course and asked if wither of us owned a silver car, it had slipped its handbrake and smashed into another car in the car park

Tbh we met quite regularly for a while after so wasn't too bad lol the best bit was trying to remember his name next day phoning the insurance lol

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By *eefyBangerMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

Being too pished to get it up

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By *andy_FraserTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"*numbing* lubricant? Why on gods name would someone invent that?! (Or is this a euphemism for something imperfectly legal?)"

It's designed to help you "last longer". Less sensation means less stimulation.

Mandy

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By *attooed gentMan
over a year ago

anywhere everywhere

Happened a few times when I was dating a non fabber until I was caught out

Having sex and no matter what position I tried I just couldn’t cum and had to fake it until one night she went to clean herself afterwards and noticed no cum. So I had to come clean about it.

Then there was the night we went a walk and the mood took over and before long we were in the woods until we heard people talking teenagers walking past and one needed a pee and was 30 feet away from us as he turned around to walk back to his friends he noticed us lets just say we didn’t hang around clothes pulled up and outta there both faces red

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha! I was also going to post about the Botanic Gardens!! I had an impromptu social there a while back which turned into more.. with an appreciative audience, it turned out

Lol we didn't have an audience... ah think!!!!

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By *eefyBangerMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Being too pished to get it up

Although I can’t say I was really embarrassed by it. I didn’t really care tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Being too pished to get it up

Although I can’t say I was really embarrassed by it. I didn’t really care tbh"

You'reva charmer!

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By *irth VaderMan
over a year ago

glasgow

These should be in a book.

Got a bit frisky with a friend and we used a wee quiet road by Linwood. We were going at it like rabbits when a guy walked past with his dog and simply wished us a good morning through the half open window. Pure riddy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you before, during or after sex????

Let's have some fun, no judgements, no nasty opinions or comments. Just some fun to brighten up someone's day.

Snapping my banjo string during oral

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you before, during or after sex????

Let's have some fun, no judgements, no nasty opinions or comments. Just some fun to brighten up someone's day.

Snapping my banjo string during oral"

Ouw, she must have been giving it yaldy.

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By *lasgow_dude2017Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

Had my ex tied to bed fuckin for ages stood up about to cum over her tits then her kid walked in we were that horny we forgot to lock door

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay

If you're going to arrange to meet someone at your work place after hours, make sure you know the cleaner's schedule!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was the time me a my girl friend at the time where having fun in the living room and my flat mate came in flung a cusion over my cock to hide it and being completely oblivious to what was going on he started talking about his day. 20 mins later I had to say look you have to leave the living room for a bit. He then rattled on about shared living space and that he was allowed to sit in the living room just as much as I was. It was at this point I had to say what we were doing as he came in!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Second worst was the ol Banjo string ping

The most embarrassing one was having guests leaving through the night because of the noise she was making

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting a knock on the door from my mam after a good hard fucking! Asking me to put the phone back on the hook

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ouch banjo string ones, bet a kick in the balls would feel like a walk In the park in comparison

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was 18 extremely d*unk heavy letting with a guy about to get naughty I vomited in his face then all over the room

Not one of my finest moments

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I was 18 extremely d*unk heavy letting with a guy about to get naughty I vomited in his face then all over the room

Not one of my finest moments"

Petting* not letting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lost a front tooth at a fab house party ooooo

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I lost a front tooth at a fab house party ooooo

Omg how did that happen or should I even ask

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On holiday recently we mistakenly left a extremely large vibrator under the covers of our bed. The maid came in and made the bed and left it between the 2 pillows so that it was standing up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On holiday recently we mistakenly left a extremely large vibrator under the covers of our bed. The maid came in and made the bed and left it between the 2 pillows so that it was standing up

Did you clean it after.. Maybe she had a go bouncing on it while holding the headboard.

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By *p for anything 123Man
over a year ago

Coatbridge

Having sex in the living room reverse cowgirl when I was 19 and just as I was cuming my mum walked I

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To cut a long story short, the night ended with me accidently setting fire to the bed.

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By *mmixtapeCouple
over a year ago

middle earth

Defo not as funny as some of the others but a good cringe.

I was seeing a boy who went to uni about a ten minute train ride from where I lived. He was very.. intense. He once asked me to get on my hands and knees and pretend to be his puppy. Being 18 I obliged.. he played fetch with me, poured some water in my mouth, slapped my bum, then he started to finger me. Now but of context be was 6ft 6 and I was on my hands on knees on his bedroom floor. Difficult angle at the best of times. Not Mr ex also wasn't very well practiced at this position when it came to fingering, and he ended up slipping out. But because of the angle, and the height difference and him forgetting to cut his nails last night I ended up with a gash from my vaginal opening and up beside my eurethra. I like a trooper brushed it off until I got confused about why I was suddenly more wet, I calmly took his hand away and there was blood all over it. To which HE started crying and asking how I could do this to him. I went to the bathroom, cleaned up a bit, and went into his room to comfort him and tell him it was all ok even though I was bleeding. The next morning when I woke up he confessed that he votes UKIP (I'm liberal) I left with a hoodie and never gave it back. I don't *think* I have a scar

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By *ucky24Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

Was working on big hotel project in Aberdeen and the owner came up to see the new staff quarters and I got dragged round which I didn't want as he was a wee freer.

First room we opened a girl was talking to god on the big white telephone.

The second room we were confronted by a guy who doing a girl doggy style facing the door we had opened.

The girl had her face buried in a pillow but wailing like a banshee.

The guy was jack hammering away looked up and without missing a stroke went "hullo there, alright"

The owner was crimson and told the assistant manager to go get the manager. At this point I exited stage left out of fire escape and nearly buckled with laughter.

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By *ucky24Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"To cut a long story short, the night ended with me accidently setting fire to the bed. "

Oh more details please, this sounds like it could take the prize!

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By *ighting the fuseMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

In a swingers club in Benalmadena when I decided to take a break from the action by having a little sit down in the corner.

Unfortunately in the moody lighting and in a San Miguel induced haze, the seat I plonked myself on turned out to be a bath that made a fair clatter as I hit the bottom in a crumpled heap.

I didnt hang around.

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By *ucky24Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"To cut a long story short, the night ended with me accidently setting fire to the bed. "

Think we need some more details as this could take first prize.

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By *uzy1000TV/TS
over a year ago

glasgow

Ripped my jeans at work, and workmates saw I was wearing black fishnets underneath, I said it was winter and my legs were cold, they said eye right with fishnets ! took pelters for it, so sacked myself and walked.

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By *ufflinkslaceMan
over a year ago

glasgow

Taking a girl back to my place after a party. After some fumbling around up against the inside of the front door, she dropped to her knees, pulled my cock out and with both hands playing on my shaft started oral. Only about 30 seconds into it, I started to feel a lot of pain and heat on my cock. Another 30 seconds later I decided I couldn't bare it anymore and decided move to the bed to stop whatever was happening. But the pain wouldn't leave, attempted to wear a condom but the pain when it touch the skin was unbearable. Spent the rest of the night saying every excuse why I didn't want to fuck and to keep her from touching my cock, while ensuring she got hers.

Next day in daylight I could see the damage that was done. Long story short...It appears that this lovely girl didn't have the best bj technique. Twisting both hands in different direction on my shaft....she literally gave my hard cock a Chinese burn.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Taking a girl back to my place after a party. After some fumbling around up against the inside of the front door, she dropped to her knees, pulled my cock out and with both hands playing on my shaft started oral. Only about 30 seconds into it, I started to feel a lot of pain and heat on my cock. Another 30 seconds later I decided I couldn't bare it anymore and decided move to the bed to stop whatever was happening. But the pain wouldn't leave, attempted to wear a condom but the pain when it touch the skin was unbearable. Spent the rest of the night saying every excuse why I didn't want to fuck and to keep her from touching my cock, while ensuring she got hers.

Oh the Chinese bangle burn ouch.

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By *onin79Man
over a year ago

The Shire

Met someone on a night out and was invited back to theirs.

We were hard at it when she turned round for me to take her from behind, I then noticed a tattoo on her shoulder, I looked more closely and realised it was picture of a friend who had not long passed away and the lady in question was his mother.

Mood killer right enough but a funny story lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This happened very recently, Met a guy off this, was having a fabulous time fucking and chatting away, and getting more and more d*unk. I blacked out d*unk but I remember slamming my front door and I think we had an argument.

Mortified is only putting it lightly. I’m an awesome d*unk, but I think I had wayyyy too much to drink on that occasion and got argumentative.

Tried apologising, but nothing as of yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ripped my jeans at work, and workmates saw I was wearing black fishnets underneath, I said it was winter and my legs were cold, they said eye right with fishnets ! took pelters for it, so sacked myself and walked.

That just made me sad...not laugh

Diddies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This happened very recently, Met a guy off this, was having a fabulous time fucking and chatting away, and getting more and more d*unk. I blacked out d*unk but I remember slamming my front door and I think we had an argument.

Mortified is only putting it lightly. I’m an awesome d*unk, but I think I had wayyyy too much to drink on that occasion and got argumentative.

Tried apologising, but nothing as of yet

Well there must have been something that was brought up to cause an argument that you just can't remember, you've apologised so you done your bit.

Move on and never mind him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I lost a front tooth at a fab house party ooooo

Omg how did that happen or should I even ask

Slid down the wall d*unk and probably knocked it out myself lol it was found eventually after I left! I still apologise when I see any of the party so embarrassed lol x

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By *ilveryFoxMan
over a year ago

Midlothian

"banjo string pingage. not that bad really but made a mess"

Holy fuck! I think my balls just inverted up into my throat

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By *r Anon1Man
over a year ago

falkirk

Had a GF a few years ago that was giving me a BJ. Just at the exact point of cumming (because of the way I was lying on the bed) my back spasmed which made me fart and thrust upward forcing my whole penis into her mouth and throat which made her back off and fall backwards off the bed banging her head on the radiator which in turn knocked her out. Luckily she was only out for about a min as the paramedics would have arrived to the Smell of chicken bhuna and a naked female with cum running down her face.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Had a GF a few years ago that was giving me a BJ. Just at the exact point of cumming (because of the way I was lying on the bed) my back spasmed which made me fart and thrust upward forcing my whole penis into her mouth and throat which made her back off and fall backwards off the bed banging her head on the radiator which in turn knocked her out. Luckily she was only out for about a min as the paramedics would have arrived to the Smell of chicken bhuna and a naked female with cum running down her face."

That's hilarious hahhaha

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By *ucky24Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

Totally buckled at that one.

However probably not the worse domestic scene that paramedics have attended involving sexual shenanigans.

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By *allAyrshireGentMan
over a year ago

Kilmarnock

At college, woke up in morning in girlfriends room in Auchincruive. Went to toilet and found to my horror that some of her hair had pierced and knotted through my banjo string somehow! Had to use surgical precision to cut through the knotted part. No idea how it happened.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I fell asleep mid fuck on top of a lady in an apartment in Playa de las Americas - don’t worry it wasn’t recent - it was 1991 - too much tequila lol

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By *ob rob 555Man
over a year ago

glasgow

For me it was a long time ago, a gf was a few months before we got round to the sex side, first time with each other she wrapped her legs round my waist so tight I farted lol. Never got round to sex with her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you before, during or after sex????

Let's have some fun, no judgements, no nasty opinions or comments. Just some fun to brighten up someone's day.

Snapping my banjo string during oral

Ouw, she must have been giving it yaldy. "

Yip she was

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By *eardyBikerMan
over a year ago

nr stonehaven

"Was working on big hotel project in Aberdeen and the owner came up to see the new staff quarters and I got dragged round which I didn't want as he was a wee freer.

First room we opened a girl was talking to god on the big white telephone.

The second room we were confronted by a guy who doing a girl doggy style facing the door we had opened.

The girl had her face buried in a pillow but wailing like a banshee.

The guy was jack hammering away looked up and without missing a stroke went "hullo there, alright"

The owner was crimson and told the assistant manager to go get the manager. At this point I exited stage left out of fire escape and nearly buckled with laughter."

Oooh , really curious for more info ha ha..

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By *eardyBikerMan
over a year ago

nr stonehaven

"Was working on big hotel project in Aberdeen and the owner came up to see the new staff quarters and I got dragged round which I didn't want as he was a wee freer.

First room we opened a girl was talking to god on the big white telephone.

The second room we were confronted by a guy who doing a girl doggy style facing the door we had opened.

The girl had her face buried in a pillow but wailing like a banshee.

The guy was jack hammering away looked up and without missing a stroke went "hullo there, alright"

The owner was crimson and told the assistant manager to go get the manager. At this point I exited stage left out of fire escape and nearly buckled with laughter.

Oooh , really curious for more info ha ha.."

Just generalities lol...live up this way so just out of nosiness

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