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when is it not an affair?

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By *rinthia OP   Man
over a year ago

dundee

so chatting to someone on here who is married and she came away with this....

its not an affair if its just sex,

an affair has to be the whole package, wine and dine sort of thing,

doing the social thing, going out and not having sex to be an affair

thoughts on this please ?

ps don't shoot me i'm only the messenger

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I would not class having just sex as an affair. Being unfaithful, cheating yes but affair no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/12/19 10:53:27]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say Sex if it's a one off (one night stand) it is classed as cheating but not an affair unless there is an attachment of feelings both physical and /or emotional and its continual lasting days weeks months and so on then its outright affair.

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By *rinthia OP   Man
over a year ago

dundee


"I'd say Sex if it's a one off (one night stand) it is classed as cheating but not an affair unless there is an attachment of feelings both physical and /or emotional and its continual lasting days weeks months and so on then its outright affair."

even if you only meet for sex?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Still cheating if her spouse does not know about it.If She is meeting same person regularly then it would be classed as an affair (if its continual on more than a few occasions.).

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By *ongue FuckerMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

One off just sex is cheating, but repeat it and it becomes an affair. A bit pedantic I know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Myself and hubby are on here as swingers..we do not have affairs.

Sex yes. affairs are emotional that said I dont get the folk that do dinners and cinema stuff that I say is crossing the line into affairs.

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By *an from UncleMan
over a year ago

ml1

I think there a big diffrence between an affair and a sex meet, unfortuatly there been many a divorce over a sex meet which is just curiosity or an urge, and is a hicup that can be sorted, an affair means the problem runs a lot deeper and the emtional spark has been lost

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By *randmissdemeanourMan
over a year ago

glasgow

An affair is when one partner goes behind their partners back. Simple. As long as each partner is aware and consents then it is fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Regular sex with the same person I would class as cheating. When dinner / cinema are introduced it’s an affair.

Both are cheating regardless. If you can’t tell your partner it’s a because it’s deceitful and could be potentially devastating.

Again, just my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/12/19 17:37:47]

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By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

Without judgement, it would go under "cheating". Do you really care what it would fall under though? x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One off just sex is cheating, but repeat it and it becomes an affair. A bit pedantic I know."

Have to agree with this one, although many other of the comments also apply. Just my twopence worth

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By *nferno sausageMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

In my opinion affairs are not about sex - affairs are about desire for connection, for intensity, for physical touch, for feeling alive. You can have a whole affair with no sex, and it is just as intense and as passionate as if you had actually had the act. It is more enchantment than performance.

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By *ncognito!Woman
over a year ago

falkirk

Op very discreet of you posting on an Open Forum.

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By *asterslittlewhoreCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I think an affair is when its more than sex when feelings are involved, random fucks are just cheating

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By *nferno sausageMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire


"I think an affair is when its more than sex when feelings are involved, random fucks are just cheating "

Is it possible to have sex with no feelings/emotions involved?

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By *ill-Ian KissesCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere over there


"An affair is when one partner goes behind their partners back. Simple. As long as each partner is aware and consents then it is fine. "

This

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"I think an affair is when its more than sex when feelings are involved, random fucks are just cheating

Is it possible to have sex with no feelings/emotions involved?"

Yes. But it’s rubbish. Imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think an affair is when its more than sex when feelings are involved, random fucks are just cheating

Is it possible to have sex with no feelings/emotions involved?

Yes. But it’s rubbish. Imo"

I was going to say this too but didn't want to sound like a big wuss....so I waited for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's why I actually need to fancy someone before having sex lol dosnt mean I feel anything else for them tho.

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"I think an affair is when its more than sex when feelings are involved, random fucks are just cheating

Is it possible to have sex with no feelings/emotions involved?

Yes. But it’s rubbish. Imo

I was going to say this too but didn't want to sound like a big wuss....so I waited for you "

Glad I could take the bullet for you you big coward. (As if)

And oldie is spot on too. Imo.

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By *ill-Ian KissesCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere over there

Think given the nature of swinging, some people meet just to play/have sex and others build up an established 'playmate' that they meet with often. It doesn't mean there has to be an emotional attachment, but as others have said, I personally like to get to know someone before playing as for me, it's more about how I/we click as a couple with that person that is more important.

Main thing is that we're both honest with each other about playing with others (can be in kink setting) and that's why we can read the messages sent to the other.

Millie

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By *nferno sausageMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

I call bullshit on the whole sex with no feelings or emotional attachment. Unless it's a pair of blow up dolls at it. Even if it's just a one-night stand with some absolute munter, a range of emotions or feelings are still involved. Attraction, anticipation, lust, arousal, satisfaction, excitement to name but a few.

There will always be strings attached. Some are just easier to break than others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I call bullshit on the whole sex with no feelings or emotional attachment. Unless it's a pair of blow up dolls at it. Even if it's just a one-night stand with some absolute munter, a range of emotions or feelings are still involved. Attraction, anticipation, lust, arousal, satisfaction, excitement to name but a few.

There will always be strings attached. Some are just easier to break than others. "

This.

Having had my fair share of both playing away whilst married and being the other woman it all counts.

Is just sex easier to get over than say sex and falling in love, probably. Is it less of a betrayal? Probably not to some and possibly yes to others..

I think once you develop deeper feelings it becomes far more complicated, messy and painful.

Not everyone that embarks on these things is the heartless villan they are often made out to be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I call bullshit on the whole sex with no feelings or emotional attachment. Unless it's a pair of blow up dolls at it. Even if it's just a one-night stand with some absolute munter, a range of emotions or feelings are still involved. Attraction, anticipation, lust, arousal, satisfaction, excitement to name but a few.

There will always be strings attached. Some are just easier to break than others.

This.

Having had my fair share of both playing away whilst married and being the other woman it all counts.

Is just sex easier to get over than say sex and falling in love, probably. Is it less of a betrayal? Probably not to some and possibly yes to others..

I think once you develop deeper feelings it becomes far more complicated, messy and painful.

Not everyone that embarks on these things is the heartless villan they are often made out to be. "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I call bullshit on the whole sex with no feelings or emotional attachment. Unless it's a pair of blow up dolls at it. Even if it's just a one-night stand with some absolute munter, a range of emotions or feelings are still involved. Attraction, anticipation, lust, arousal, satisfaction, excitement to name but a few.

There will always be strings attached. Some are just easier to break than others. "

Agreed

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