FabSwingers.com forum: Nerves for no reason

By *andy_Fraser OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Have any of you ever had an issue of having nerves for no logical reason, and if so, what did you do to calm them?

In my case it's just over my next night out. It's in a safe and relaxed atmosphere, but I just keep getting a feeling of dread about it.

It'll probably all be fine nn the night, but I just can't help it.

Mandy

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow

I’ve suffered the same at times for all sorts of reasons , try some breathing exercises once you get used to doing them they can come in handy no matter where you are . ( take care and have a great time )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Recently I have started suffering this, and only way I can get through it is to just push through it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you normally get anxious in social situations?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like the start of a panic attack.

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Have any of you ever had an issue of having nerves for no logical reason, and if so, what did you do to calm them?

In my case it's just over my next night out. It's in a safe and relaxed atmosphere, but I just keep getting a feeling of dread about it.

It'll probably all be fine nn the night, but I just can't help it.

Mandy"

Hi Mandy. Is there something different about this night out? You have been to other social events so try to work out if there is something different about this one. Has it been a while since your last night out? etc... Are you nervous or are your guts telling you that something is off.

If I am nervous, I would just take a deep breath and tell myself that I can always leave if I am not comfortable.

If my guts are telling me that something is off, I listen and avoid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have started getting symptoms of anxiety or dread ovet the last few months it's generally at night and always work based to point wakening up at night but once at work not as bad as I know any situation or problem which arises and they normally do I can handle it's almost like I enjoy the pressure if that makes sense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve always been somewhat of a social extrovert most of my life and enjoy socialising, however sometimes I physically can’t leave my house because anxieties overwhelm me, my first panic attack ever took a hold of me about 7years ago and I was just out of hospital after being dehydrated and my body shutting down on me spent five days on a drip, having been in hospital I had loads of stuff to do and badly needed food shopping, I was in Tesco and started to feel incredibly ill and light headed and could barely stand and was staggering about the shop trying to get out the door and get fresh air and sit down and suddenly I started to panic about what if I’d collapsed would anyone have helped me, folk were looking at me in disgust I think they thought I was d*unk or on drugs. I can remember the feeling like it was yesterday and since then for no reason I randomly get this happening to me, I can no longer use public transport or go out walking on my own without an overwhelming sense of dread. I do try to get out as often as I can in social settings with friends but I’m not always the same on these occasions as I sometimes I can’t settle, I don’t drink anymore and perhaps that’s half the reason I get like this now lol I still struggle with shopping etc and visiting new places but if I know I’m going somewhere with friends or where I know lots of people I just remind myself of this and that I’m in control I have the car I’m not drinking and can leave at any time and I don’t have to stay (try telling bubbly that at 2am lol move yer ass I need my bed) for me having that control makes it easier, relying on other people though to get me home or organise a night for me then it’s a whole different scenario ! Took me a few years to find my trigger points but defo not relying on anyone else to get me from A2B is my big one

if I do decide very rarely I’m staying out or having a drink hotels transport fine details are all planned well in advance, I feel like a bit of a control freak at times lol my hen weekend had me in cold sweats for months lol

Things like this can happen to anyone at anytime but being self aware and going with someone who understands and has your back makes a huge difference. I’m sure you’ll have a great night but do Make sure someone knows you’re feeling a bit wobbly about it before hand and is willing to be your wingman for the evening

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By *arroness NikkiWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Have any of you ever had an issue of having nerves for no logical reason, and if so, what did you do to calm them?

In my case it's just over my next night out. It's in a safe and relaxed atmosphere, but I just keep getting a feeling of dread about it.

It'll probably all be fine nn the night, but I just can't help it.

Mandy"

Happens all the time with me too. I think it’s especially common if your tv/cd or transgender

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By *andy_Fraser OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Do you normally get anxious in social situations?

Not really. I just go quiet in larger crowds.

Mandy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm no expert but what has helped for me in the past is to run through the event causing me anxiety in my head. Almost like a a wee video clip..."I'll go in and say hello to X, chat to Y, take a time out if I need it....". If I find myself catastrophizing, I would remind myself that I'm in a safe, friendly environment and nothing can harm me. And I'm in total control of the situation and can leave when I want.

Hope you enjoy the night out x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont worry about it nerves are natural. It's the worrying that makes the problem. And as for being quiet in large groups happens to us all. I'm a very social person but I tend to loose myself In large groups when out. yet i can deal with large groups at work

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By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

Yep, every time i go to a club or pub on my own, despite knowing there'll be people there i know.

It's always fine as soon as I'm inside and no doubt you'll be the same.

Hope you enjoy your night x

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By *ongue FuckerMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Have to agree everyone will suffer this but you just need to press on and push through

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got chance to kiss someone I had wanted to for ages

We had kissed years ago and it was amazing but chance never came again for a while

I was sssooooo nervous, almost shaking as I didn't want to dissappoint

Was a brill kiss but she knew I was nervous and asked why.....

#confidenceissues lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/11/19 17:27:28]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I enjoyed Ant Middletons book and he talks about a ‘fear bubble’ which I can relate to. We allow our minds to start thinking the worst possible outcomes, what if I trip up, what if no one talks to me, what if I spill my drink etc etc. What if may never happen. Don’t allow your mind to think ‘what if’ and burst this fear bubble we create. Trip up and spill your drink, you’ll have a great time. Deep breaths, nothing is ever as bad as we believe it will be x

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Alcohol.

No. I jest. As others have said above but also trying not to think on the event too much beyond planning and making sure you know where to be and when and sleeping or travelling plans in place. (Expect curve balls on the night - you know who I’m talking too

) but by the time you’re in the mix you’ll relax. I’ve seen you totally relaxed and mixing it up great. You’ll be grand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cannot recommend Valerian Root enough for anxiety, it changed my life!! Xxx

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By *andy_Fraser OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

For anyone following this, my nerves are basically gone now.

There will still be the usual going out nerves on the night, but not to the extent that were previously.

Thank you everyone for the kind words.

Mandy

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"For anyone following this, my nerves are basically gone now.

There will still be the usual going out nerves on the night, but not to the extent that were previously.

Thank you everyone for the kind words.

Mandy"

Excellent

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow

"For anyone following this, my nerves are basically gone now.

There will still be the usual going out nerves on the night, but not to the extent that were previously.

Thank you everyone for the kind words.

Mandy"

Was there anything that helped particularly better than another method ?

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