FabSwingers.com forum: Abused by my Girlfriend

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just watched this in BBC3 , Heartbreakingly horrendous . Decent decent kid almost killed by a seemingly lovely well brought up Girl . Is it just me or are the sheer bastards of society on the increase

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Media coverage doesn't miss much now so I think it's more to do with that. There's always been loads of bastards walking the streets

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By *evilsAdvocate94Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Just watched this in BBC3 , Heartbreakingly horrendous . Decent decent kid almost killed by a seemingly lovely well brought up Girl . Is it just me or are the sheer bastards of society on the increase "

He was on BBC breakfast it’s utterly heart breaking glad that policeman realised there was something far wrong or dread to think what might have happened.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He was on BBC breakfast it’s utterly heart breaking glad that policeman realised there was something far wrong or dread to think what might have happened."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He was on BBC breakfast it’s utterly heart breaking glad that policeman realised there was something far wrong or dread to think what might have happened."
was no dread about it , the wee Guy was dead !!!! Once again it’s the fear of society ridicule and letting friends and family down that almost cost him his life !! Hats off to the thoroughly decent copper

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By *herubs Social EventsCouple
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Alot of posts on social media about this I'm going to watch it xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/02/19 10:39:01]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now normally I am full of crap and nonsense but put that aside for now.

I watched the program last night.

Very sad and in parts unbelievable.

But I personally have experienced abuse.

I reckon it's the tip of Ice berg I am going to say 50/50.

I used to make a joke of it to mates.

Used to think I deserved it.

I 've never told the real stories.

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By *rMrsWTFCouple
over a year ago

Arbroath

I once thought that it's just the fact there's more media coverage but now I think op is right there is way more evil despicable people in the world now than ever before are jails are soft our justice system is a joke so there's nothing to put people off pleasing them selves and its getting worse

We also need to get involved more if you have concern for someone speak up dont let it lie keep asking keep reporting

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By *azw39Man
over a year ago

scotland

I’ve not seen it,but have been on the receiving end of by once,until something bad happens you get made out to the bad one,I’ve had my nose broken,a glass smashed in my face above my eye when that needed 8 stitches when it happened I got hand cuffed to a hospital bed for having a go at the police!i have told only a select few people that coz I felt embarrassed about it!

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By *rMrsWTFCouple
over a year ago

Arbroath

"I’ve not seen it,but have been on the receiving end of by once,until something bad happens you get made out to the bad one,I’ve had my nose broken,a glass smashed in my face above my eye when that needed 8 stitches when it happened I got hand cuffed to a hospital bed for having a go at the police!i have told only a select few people that coz I felt embarrassed about it!"

You shouldn't feel embarrassed talk about it might just help someone who's going through it, I hope you've healed and will never forget your worth so much more and never deserved to be treated like that

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By *ary_ArgyllMan
over a year ago

Argyll

It's always gone on and probably in the past 1950s etc perhaps even more so - used to be laughed off as a bit "of a domestic" and until recently the police would not even get involved. It's like a lot of stuff which is gradually emerging from the shadows and doesn;t mean people are any better or worse than they always were.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Watched it last night as a survivor too its good to see things are changing and its getting taken more seriously happened to me when i was 18 with my first gf constantly cheated on, (only found that out after we split), battered if she didnt get her on way, sat on and spit on, knife held to my throat, pot that was thrown of my head leaving a hairline fracture on my skull, tried to report her twice and she managed to wrap the police round her finger and im the one getting the blame instead, thankfully we split after 4yrs but 35 now and it still stays with u can be really hard to trust again

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Heartbreaking and really brave of him to tell his story, also others on this thread who have survived this type of abuse. The bit that got me the most was his Grandad, who obviously adored him as much as Alex worshipped him back.

The kids will also suffer as decisions in the future will have to be made about access, and how they’ll feel about her.

Thanks Op as I wouldn’t have seen this, if you didn’t start this post.

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By *ane DTV/TS
over a year ago

London

From personal bitter experience, it extends into the support services.

Who often, to quote a 1st Minister, take the one eyed view that "men are the problem".

1 in 6 men will suffer some form of abuse, but less than 1 in 20 will report it.

If you or someone close to you is suffering, get them to call the ManKind Initiative.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's always gone on and probably in the past 1950s etc perhaps even more so - used to be laughed off as a bit "of a domestic" and until recently the police would not even get involved. It's like a lot of stuff which is gradually emerging from the shadows and doesn;t mean people are any better or worse than they always were."

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By *azw39Man
over a year ago

scotland

Police are arseholes and cowards,I’ve got 3 breach of the peace offences for trying to protect myself and nearly went got sent to jail!i gave her everything as I Cudnt be fucked being in the same space as her,I mean my business my house my dogs car,and left with 1 bag of clothes!!happyiness is more important than being miserable trying to save something that’s fucked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now normally I am full of crap and nonsense but put that aside for now.

I watched the program last night.

Very sad and in parts unbelievable.

But I personally have experienced abuse.

I reckon it's the tip of Ice berg I am going to say 50/50.

I used to make a joke of it to mates.

Used to think I deserved it.

I 've never told the real stories.

I found your comment so sad. No one ever deserves to be abused in any way shape or form! I hope you’ve realised your worth more than brushing it off... I suppose that how a lot of men cope and deal with abuse, and sadly society has a misconstrued perception that men need to be men. I dont think we ever tell the real stories until we if ever, fully heal. I’m also a survivor. Happier than I’m ever been... thought I’d end on a happy note

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/02/19 22:07:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 20/02/19 22:07:32]"

Good on you gaz!!

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By *ralsatisfactionMan
over a year ago

South Lanarkshire

What channel was this on?

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By *ralsatisfactionMan
over a year ago

South Lanarkshire

What channel was this on and what was the programme called?

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By *inUpGirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"What channel was this on and what was the programme called?"

It's in bbc 3 x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guy was on ITV this morning talking about it. Heartbreaking.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

I watched it last night so sad especially for his family too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something which irritated me slightly was the female reporter pointing out that the majority of domestic abuse victims are female. I would have thought most people already know this! The guy was on to talk about his experience of male donestic violence which is massively under reported because of social stigma so stick to that.

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By *evilsAdvocate94Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

On the back of folk posting here and other places I started watching that R Kelly thing ....

How is that absolute beast still a free man!!!!!

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By *azw39Man
over a year ago

scotland

mental abuse happens to 90% of people everyday!!

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By *dmirationMan
over a year ago

Bathgate

Mental and physical abuse has went on for many many years and not just by partners, parents also with kids and it was all ignored bye the system care Holmes children's Holmes...

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay

After many years of a progressively abusive relationship, I left, a broken man.

What hurt even more was that she told various mutual friends that I was the abuser and they shunned me. Over time they have apologised as she could not hide her true nature.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On the back of folk posting here and other places I started watching that R Kelly thing ....

How is that absolute beast still a free man!!!!! "

Yeah, watched that a few weeks ago. Absolute fucking scumbag of a man. And the fannies who were going to court every day to support him.

.....and don't get me started on the pish music.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know it’s funny how some of us react to this. Like if it is a lassie I’d be like that’s horrible. But when I seen it was the other way around I was like wtf why did he not just leave. I know that sounds really bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know it’s funny how some of us react to this. Like if it is a lassie I’d be like that’s horrible. But when I seen it was the other way around I was like wtf why did he not just leave. I know that sounds really bad "

That's part of the problem Rasta.

I think in this case there were also kids involved (?....someone correct me if I'm wrong) and the poor guy was afraid to leave them behind as he was certain his partner would get custody as she's the Mum. I've certainly heard that before , in cases where it's been difficult to prove that the female is the abusive partner. She's more likely to be given the benefit of the doubt and get the kids.

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By *evilsAdvocate94Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"On the back of folk posting here and other places I started watching that R Kelly thing ....

How is that absolute beast still a free man!!!!!

Yeah, watched that a few weeks ago. Absolute fucking scumbag of a man. And the fannies who were going to court every day to support him.

.....and don't get me started on the pish music.

Never really like his music but I just can’t beleive he’s still wandering about getting away with that. And all those arses that covered it up for him are just as feckin guilty

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By *ittleMizzNaughty88.Woman
over a year ago

Renfrewshire

If only it was that easy to get up & leave!

So many things prevented this poor man from leaving the narcissistic midden.

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By *azw39Man
over a year ago

scotland

Yeah I had people doubting me even my own mum,but hey shits happens it only makes you stronger and a better person,I gave up everything to that I had just to prove a point to myself and took a few good months to get over it,I happy in my life do the job I live and put smiles on peoples faces every day with the job I do,as I said the police are the worst for pointing the blame in another direction,X

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By *ictiiWitchCouple
over a year ago

Helensburgh

"Yeah I had people doubting me even my own mum,but hey shits happens it only makes you stronger and a better person,I gave up everything to that I had just to prove a point to myself and took a few good months to get over it,I happy in my life do the job I live and put smiles on peoples faces every day with the job I do,as I said the police are the worst for pointing the blame in another direction,X"

Sometimes you don't get over it, sometimes you block it as the only way to move forward and it comes back to bite you in the arse years later.

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay

Can only speak for myself.

It didn't start as an abusive relationship, it built up slowly over time, years in my case.

Slowly controlling many different aspects, cutting you off from family and friends, constantly being blamed, escalating violence. You think I can handle this, it can't get worse, then it does but you adapt and keep going.

She even convinced me to get therapy I was allegedly such a failure. This backfired spectacularly as the therapist

Immediately recognised the actual situation and got me out.

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

"Now normally I am full of crap and nonsense but put that aside for now.

I watched the program last night.

Very sad and in parts unbelievable.

But I personally have experienced abuse.

I reckon it's the tip of Ice berg I am going to say 50/50.

I used to make a joke of it to mates.

Used to think I deserved it.

I 've never told the real stories.

Brave to admit that you experienced it. Well done.

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

Such brave people to admit what happened. I admire your courage. Fab never ceases to amaze me with the support that it can offer.

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By *tsMe4UMan
over a year ago

motherwell

Reading some of these messages gave me flashbacks. I had a gf many years ago who hit me on several occasions, it took an awful lot of willpower not to retaliate. Given my size and hers if I had, I know I would have done some serious damage and would have been the one in trouble.

Now I think about it, I can see how that could have escalated if I hadn’t managed to get out. A lucky escape!

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By *awk3y3Man
over a year ago

West Lothian

From BBC News

Singer R Kelly has been charged on Friday with 10 counts of aggravated criminal sexual abuse, some involving underage victims, US media report.

#abouttime

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By *evilsAdvocate94Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"From BBC News

Singer R Kelly has been charged on Friday with 10 counts of aggravated criminal sexual abuse, some involving underage victims, US media report.

#abouttime"

God he’s been charged let’s hope they get it to trial now and get a conviction

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it's a hRd thing for a guy to say or admit they are getting harassment or bullied by there ex female. I was in the same position as the guy. I met a female then she changed constantly mind games

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