FabSwingers.com forum: Should I tell hubby

By *mallteaser OP Woman
over a year ago

Central

Hi there, when first joined here the idea was too live a little, explore new things, what with hubby being so straight laced.......but now he's very suspect the amount if time on on iPad and pc.

Should I try and test the water with him?

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"Hi there, when first joined here the idea was too live a little, explore new things, what with hubby being so straight laced.......but now he's very suspect the amount if time on on iPad and pc.

Should I try and test the water with him?"

Id be very very carefull if i was you i see your verified not sure if its play meets or what but if your already swinging without his knowlage then it could cause massive problems for you .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Set aside some time for yourselves, tell him your fantasies/desires, let him tell you his, and see where that goes. Sooner or later though the truth will out. Not being judgemental by the way.

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By *mallteaser OP Woman
over a year ago

Central

I'd be selective in what I'd say, im just finding it more and more difficult too chat and get some private time, x

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By *mallteaser OP Woman
over a year ago

Central

"Set aside some time for yourselves, tell him your fantasies/desires, let him tell you his, and see where that goes. Sooner or later though the truth will out. Not being judgemental by the way.

Kind of hard too talk openly like that, he is quite set in his ways, and have very little experience myself. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Communication is the key! Is it worth possibly throwing your marriage away for swinging? We would say, come off the site, and talk like we said before, he may surprise you, hope it works out for you.

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By *mallteaser OP Woman
over a year ago

Central

"Communication is the key! Is it worth possibly throwing your marriage away for swinging? We would say, come off the site, and talk like we said before, he may surprise you, hope it works out for you."

Thanks, I totally understand, x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why not drop some hints , saying you heard about it on some tv program and looked into the site ..... Don't show him your verified profile but it might just get him interested .

Best of both worlds?

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By *idodidoCouple
over a year ago

banff

This weeks shameless has open marriage as a topic, could be a way to broach the subject.

Good luck

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By *anictechCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow - ish ;-)

Hubby might be straight laced outwardly but has inner feelings?

Till we stumbled upon this scene we thought each other were str8 laced, once we opened up and disscussed things we found out differently.

Being Mum & Dad brings out qualities in us, but equally burried feelings or fantasys we had.. Human nature, we do what seems right, but not always what is right for us. It is possilbe to have both worlds.

Ive said it before and i'll say it again, swing saved our marriage. It is possible to have a happy home and a healthy sexual life that explores. As was mentioned before, communication is the way forward.

Good luck XxX MT

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just remember that you know your husband better than anyone on here, we can all say yes tell him but only you know what the possible outcome is.

How would you think he would react to seeing you with another guy etc,

If you think there's a chance he could be open to it, bring up the topic of swinging, say you read it in a magazine and there was a man and wife who met others for sex etc, just describe it and ask what he thinks about it, is it normal or is it just a one way path to divorce...

By his opinion you'll know exactly what he thinks without risking an argument xxx

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By *mallteaser OP Woman
over a year ago

Central

Thanks all for some great advice, x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ill say the same as i do fa males that do it

Be very careful swinging is a trust situation for most couples and if he is introduced to it the truth will out that you have been there first and that could cause big problems

Good luck though cause i fa one think he deserves a chance at fun too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well helen go for it

try and see what happens , i did try with mine but she blanked it x

it took a while but i play alone with others , the time has to be when your ready and not others

alot rest on it with marraige and kids and stuff

you know me helen , we have spoke about it before

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By *ayne n JockCouple
over a year ago

Dunfermline

I would 'plant the seed' by saying you fancy trying it and let him think about it for a few hours / days [whatever you think best] .. then ask what he thinks. If he is open to the idea then talk more and suggest researching the possibilities online .. find FAB together [or another site may be safer LOL]then make a couple profile if he is happy to do so - then delete your single one and start living without secrets.

I do understand the importance of trust & honesty but I think telling him you have already 'been there / done that' would be a huge shock to him and it could damage your relationship bigtime rather than help.

You will know how much to say as you know him best .. trust your 'gut' on his reaction

Good luck

Jayne x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

would you choose your husband over swinging?

do you think there's a possibility of him leaving if you told him?

if the answer to both these is yes, don't tell him. by all means, try test the waters, slip it into conversation. if it remotely interests him, you'll probably know from his reaction.

it might not sound the nicest thing in the world, but what he doesn't know can't hurt him. it may just be best to play alone and keep him in the dark if he's against swinging.

like others have said though, it's all good us giving advice, but you know your husband better than anyone else, and only you can decide how to proceed. good luck with whatever you choose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi there, when first joined here the idea was too live a little, explore new things, what with hubby being so straight laced.......but now he's very suspect the amount if time on on iPad and pc.

Should I try and test the water with him?"

Be honest with him. He is the man you love. Share your feelings and thoughts with him.......and ask if he wishes to share your dreams and fantasies

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By *issNaughtyxxxWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

You know your own husband but in experience if you dig alittle deeper you may find he has some things he'd like to try and things could be even more exciting for you both on here together.

Id have some time together, chat and have fun. Mention the idea of swinging and see where it leads. Do you think if he said yes lets go for it, would you enjoying swinging more than you are now? Wish you all the best.

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By *issNaughtyxxxWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

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By *outhsider69Man
over a year ago

glasgow

Ive been on this site 2 years, and would love it if my wife was remotely interested. She has discovered this twice and while talks initially went well, she recoiled from the idea.

Third time lucky though i hope, we have talked a little about it and she's opening up to a few things. wish i'd talked sooner

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By *nTCouple
over a year ago

funland

it might never be what he wants, not everyone does and never will, or this site would have a million members from scotland alone!!

but talking about what his fantasies are may lead to you fulfilling both your fantasies in the bedroom and you might not have a need for fab anymore

good luck x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree, trust is a huge issue in swinging as it is in most relationships/marraiges.

Only you know your husband. Do what you think is right x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

god there is some real sanctimonious tripe on this thread...it is an intensely private issue that is obviously causing real pain to the OP. Life is less than perfect!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was looking at swinging sites about 6 years ago via google and stupidly thought my wife did check history. Well one night after being out with her mate she came in and was looking for something on the internet and found that I was looking at those sites and we haven't looked back since. Granted when she asked me what the feck I was looking at I shat myself but the sex that night was fecking great.

I suggest that you try and get him to have a fantisy about u with another guy or woman and take it from there. Evry guy wants to see his woman with another woman and if they say no thenthey are liars LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was looking at swinging sites about 6 years ago via google and stupidly thought my wife did check history. Well one night after being out with her mate she came in and was looking for something on the internet and found that I was looking at those sites and we haven't looked back since. Granted when she asked me what the feck I was looking at I shat myself but the sex that night was fecking great.

My hubbby prefers to see me with other men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope you find the right solution

D xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

broach the subject from a different angle ie. sex fantasies etc and see what the reaction is and take it from there, hope it works out well for you its a touchy subject for some to deal with

good luck

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"god there is some real sanctimonious tripe on this thread...it is an intensely private issue that is obviously causing real pain to the OP. Life is less than perfect!"

god there is some real sanctimonious tripe on this thread

Im sorry but i dont agree with you i think all of the comments have been said in all honesty towards the OP

we dont and never will have the same opinions if its such and intensely private issus why post it here in the first place ?

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