FabSwingers.com forum: Scotland the review

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok so where to begin

Drove thrue some awesome rally style country lanes near lanark as lovely quaint little stand alone houses at roadside and a couple nice villages as i came to the place where i was staying altho saying that you guys need to learn how to use a steam roller and a spirit lever cos damn you cannot make roads flat for shit

The real life people were generally nice pleasant normal apart from one or too total loony

There's a real population crisis looming tho as the amount of women around towns were ridiculously out numbered by males

Some of the fab girls up here have been lovely shame u all work nights and evenings

But in all my best description of the people would be a small percentage of diamonds in a sea of coal Santa must have a hell of a grudge against

Food mixed i had a lovely maccies nice service speedy bonus chips

Fry up herby sausage is an issue why mess with the flavour of meat

Dont get me started on sunday roasts wrong just wrong small aunt bessie yorkshire puds shitty gravy

Weather

Not as bad as rumours suggest sltho it was snowing a but but i put that down to the fridged folks

Gratitude most were polote but loose marks for looking a girt

Horse in the mouth and missing out in the best fab has to offer

So il say out if 10

5/10 totally average

Will i return highly unlikely

Thanks u were uneventfull

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oanne_MacTV/TS
over a year ago

Perth

meh

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

Well your experience isnt mine.

Been to a fair few places in scotland, As a driver collecting and delivering up there.

Most of the places I have been too have some loverly ladies.

Polite and know how to have fun and tease people.

Been woken up many a time, Early morning with a loverly breakfast and a hot mug of coffee.

Highest ive been is fraserburgh and inverness, Theres some gorgeous places up there.

Some loverly drop off cliff edges and some of those seaside little towns.

Loverly little places you wouldnt even know they was there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?

I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre

"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

Let us reciprocate with a review of your threads while we let you stay in our country.

Thread one - boring

Thread two - desperate

Thread three- seriously desperate

Thread four- holy crap batman this guy is desperate for a shag

Thread five- is he still here

Thread six - trip adviser boring

Thread seven will hopefully be called " i closed the door on the way out "

Im only joking mucker your welcome back to Scotland anytime.

If nothing else it makes the rest of us guys more appealing when the see the best Engerlund has to offer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok so where to begin

The real life people were generally nice pleasant normal apart from one or too total loony

There's a real population crisis looming tho as the amount of women around towns were ridiculously out numbered by males

Some of the fab girls up here have been lovely shame u all work nights and evenings

But in all my best description of the people would be a small percentage of diamonds in a sea of coal Santa must have a hell of a grudge against

Food mixed i had a lovely maccies nice service speedy bonus chips

Fry up herby sausage is an issue why mess with the flavour of meat

Dont get me started on sunday roasts wrong just wrong small aunt bessie yorkshire puds shitty gravy

Weather

Not as bad as rumours suggest sltho it was snowing a but but i put that down to the fridged folks

Gratitude most were polote but loose marks for looking a girt

Horse in the mouth and missing out in the best fab has to offer

So il say out if 10

5/10 totally average

Will i return highly unlikely

Thanks u were uneventfull

I'm amazed you wrote this, the fact you believe it and I don't know how you did through whatever you took.

What strikes me is that you're using food to back up your statements that has no relevance to Scottish culture. American junk and central European (mostly french) derived cuisines as gauge points. LOL

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uvmatureMan
over a year ago

Richmond and Scotland

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

Well said! this guy is a moron.His pathetic attempt at a 'review' is almost unreadable due to his poor spelling and grammar. It would be interesting to know where he lives in Yorkshire because I can tell you there are some shitholes down there!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

So because you couldn't get your hole it you threw the teddy out the pram.

Bye then.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looks like you upset the natives bud

Haste ye back

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eelouWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Don't let the door hit you on the arse on the way oot sunshine. I'm sure we'll survive!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are aware he is having a laugh.. tongue and cheek style.. he is known for his sarky humour!!

And any way, cant believe i will say this..

"NEXT".....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

Thoroughly enjoyed your posts, I thought they were funny. Shame you didn't find some fab related company, but I'm sure you'll live. Save journey home x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok so where to begin

Drove thrue some awesome .....

Did ye aye?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lived and worked in the Scottish Borders for a year in my youth and loved it, beautiful countryside, lovely friendly people, excellent food, loads to do..even on a Tuesday!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 30/01/19 08:27:31]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Last time I visited Scotland was in 2008 to Dumfries. It was freezing in August and raining. The food was very odd to say the least.

However I’m sure there are some beautiful places to visit there. Edinburgh is on my to do list at some point.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.

You will be very welcome.

There will be scores of folks more than happy to show you around and unearth to you our little Tuesday night secrets.

Just ask

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Last time I visited Scotland was in 2008 to Dumfries. It was freezing in August and raining. The food was very odd to say the least.

However I’m sure there are some beautiful places to visit there. Edinburgh is on my to do list at some point.

"
bloody kiss up

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How cute is this

Like a Disneyland review based on the janny's cupboard, and fact that none of the princesses want to shag you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? "
nooo lol even ignored the fking herb sausage who runs pork like that lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? nooo lol even ignored the fking herb sausage who runs pork like that lol"

I can't believe you didn't go get a battered pizza. I'm really disappointed in you!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittleMizzNaughty88.Woman
over a year ago

Renfrewshire

The amount of threads you've made,

Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ullie-kingMan
over a year ago

newmains

Herb sausage... musta been a Toby carvery type place you were at. Better grub out a chuck wagon tbf.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? nooo lol even ignored the fking herb sausage who runs pork like that lol

I can't believe you didn't go get a battered pizza. I'm really disappointed in you! "
no idea where to find them i did ask for a tour guide days ago

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The amount of threads you've made,

Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ?

Im not worried im still getting offers for next time but il have to disappoint as il not be back up

Wont be a next time im sure il be ok tho the mental scars will heal at the border or at least the next watering hole

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Herb sausage... musta been a Toby carvery type place you were at. Better grub out a chuck wagon tbf."
well nobody told me that again a tour guide add was placed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittleMizzNaughty88.Woman
over a year ago

Renfrewshire

"The amount of threads you've made,

Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ?

Im not worried im still getting offers for next time but il have to disappoint as il not be back up

Wont be a next time im sure il be ok tho the mental scars will heal at the border or at least the next watering hole

Oh a game of playing dangling the Cumberland sausage now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The amount of threads you've made,

Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ?

Im not worried im still getting offers for next time but il have to disappoint as il not be back up

Wont be a next time im sure il be ok tho the mental scars will heal at the border or at least the next watering hole

Oh a game of playing dangling the Cumberland sausage now

"
dunno what thats means

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.

Now you have given plenty notice, I'm sure that arrangements can be made...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.

Now you have given plenty notice, I'm sure that arrangements can be made...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? "

He didnt even try

Haggis, neeps & tatties

chicken haggis and bacon roll

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think

Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast?

He didnt even try

Haggis, neeps & tatties

chicken haggis and bacon roll

"
i was just sick in my mouth does that qualify

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anon6dMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Lol what a great wind up. That fishing rod is working overtime .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Lol what a great wind up. That fishing rod is working overtime . "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Make it 6 i just saw an eagle

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Weird how baiting people is so the done thing online haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tormin1875Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

Spot on Rubi, you forgot to mention that when god was creating Scotland giving us these majestic mountains, rolling hills, beautiful lochs and of course wonderful people. One of gods angels questioned him asking if he was not being to generous.

God replied, not really, wait till you see the neighbours im giving them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *stonDBS2Man
over a year ago

Kirkcaldy

Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Coalville maybe.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

"
holbeck

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How cute is this

Like a Disneyland review based on the janny's cupboard, and fact that none of the princesses want to shag you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck"

Pontefract

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

"
thats not leeds

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

Ive just spent 11 weeks before xmas in aberdeen, first day I familiarized myself with the area.

As I was working there.

Its how I know some of the cuisine in scotland.

Had some loverly meals as well.

I was about 5 mins away from the town centre

Im due to return back to the area and work elsewhere in a loverly cottage with loverly sea views.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

thats not leeds"

I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

thats not leeds

I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... "
it wasnt that good ffs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

thats not leeds

I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs

Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *add boyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

O Flower of Scotland,

When will we see

Your like again,

That fought and died for,

Your wee bit Hill and Glen,

And stood against him,

Proud Edward's Army,

And sent him homeward,

To think again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

thats not leeds

I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs

Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from...

well armadale is twinned with armley apparently

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

thats not leeds

I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs

Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from...

well armadale is twinned with armley apparently "

Lincoln Green! The dogs go round in 2s! It’s a scary dark place........

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.

We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.

Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.

Plus snow is pretty.

What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.

Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.

We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place

God replied, not really, wait till you see the neighbours im giving them.

Pfffft

Sorry to hear your trip was not as good as you would have liked OP. Scotland is and will always be amazing though. I can't wait to go again!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.

Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds?

holbeck

Pontefract

thats not leeds

I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs

Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from...

well armadale is twinned with armley apparently

Lincoln Green! The dogs go round in 2s! It’s a scary dark place........"
wasnt as bad as that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread