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Parenting advice

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill

Not for us I might add, we are sprogless.

My good friend has a wee boy who turns four next month. She is on her own with him and he is her first child. She has no previous experience with kids.

When asking her son something to day and him denying doing it she gave him into trouble and told him he lied, to which he responded....

NO I FUCKING DIDNT

She gave him into trouble then asked me for advise. I said it was out of character for him and maybe just ignore it as a one off.

Two hours later he comes out with.....

What you fucking talking about

And

What the fuck is all that about.

He’s never swore before and I’ve never heard anyone swear around him.

I’m positive those on here with kids will have experienced this so what’s the best way to handle it?

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just fucking ignore it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She needs to loom at the social surround the her son is in. I.e at friends houses with older siblings that may be swearing also friends parents who may be arguing is separating and are fighting with each other and using foul language. If your friend doesn't swear in front of him and I assume it's not from watching telly or YouTube programmes then it must be social environment.

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Well they dont teach words like that at nursery so maybe heard it on tv. Best ignored for now.

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill

The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

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By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

Was it just a one off that day? If he does it again I'd give him another warning and when he's calm try to speak to him that he shouldn't say those words (if he's in a good mood, try to get out of him where he picks it up as well).

If it becomes a regular thing start taking a toy away every time he's at it. He'll realise he'll be out of his favourite toys soon and will hopefully stop it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kids will repeat new words, especially when they get a reaction to it. Tell her not to sweat the small stuff

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"Was it just a one off that day? If he does it again I'd give him another warning and when he's calm try to speak to him that he shouldn't say those words (if he's in a good mood, try to get out of him where he picks it up as well).

If it becomes a regular thing start taking a toy away every time he's at it. He'll realise he'll be out of his favourite toys soon and will hopefully stop it x"

That’s similar to what I said. His birthday is in a few weeks so I said to maybe say ‘that’s no present from gran’ if he says it again then just use different people each time and reminding him he will end up with no presents if he keeps saying it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started"

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

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By *rMrsWTFCouple
over a year ago

Arbroath

Explain to him why it is wrong to use this language and what the punishment will be if it continues and although it's been said they don't teach it nursey he will pick it up there and think it's cool if other children are using it and possibly be getting more attention if they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If ignoring doesnt work id say she should try explain that only bad boys and girls say "fuck" then everytime he says it she reminds him mum doesnt like bad boys who use that word.. 4 yr olds dont like getting told their bad.. She should then praise him the less he says it.. Wee extra cuddles then hopfully his wee bad habit disappears.. No manual when you become a mum sadly so remind her of that..all kids pick up wee words they shouldnt say

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries. "

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"If ignoring doesnt work id say she should try explain that only bad boys and girls say "fuck" then everytime he says it she reminds him mum doesnt like bad boys who use that word.. 4 yr olds dont like getting told their bad.. She should then praise him the less he says it.. Wee extra cuddles then hopfully his wee bad habit disappears.. No manual when you become a mum sadly so remind her of that..all kids pick up wee words they shouldnt say "

That’s it exactly you have to wing it with kids. She does a really good job with him and this is totally out of character. She’s doing the ‘bad boys say that word’ thing just now. Hopefully that does the trick.

Thanks for the helpful comment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If ignoring doesnt work id say she should try explain that only bad boys and girls say "fuck" then everytime he says it she reminds him mum doesnt like bad boys who use that word.. 4 yr olds dont like getting told their bad.. She should then praise him the less he says it.. Wee extra cuddles then hopfully his wee bad habit disappears.. No manual when you become a mum sadly so remind her of that..all kids pick up wee words they shouldnt say

That’s it exactly you have to wing it with kids. She does a really good job with him and this is totally out of character. She’s doing the ‘bad boys say that word’ thing just now. Hopefully that does the trick.

Thanks for the helpful comment "

Don't have anything helpful to add to the above.....coming from the mother whose 3yr old was heard muttering "fucking nightmare!" when she couldn't get her wee tights down in time for a pee

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"If ignoring doesnt work id say she should try explain that only bad boys and girls say "fuck" then everytime he says it she reminds him mum doesnt like bad boys who use that word.. 4 yr olds dont like getting told their bad.. She should then praise him the less he says it.. Wee extra cuddles then hopfully his wee bad habit disappears.. No manual when you become a mum sadly so remind her of that..all kids pick up wee words they shouldnt say

That’s it exactly you have to wing it with kids. She does a really good job with him and this is totally out of character. She’s doing the ‘bad boys say that word’ thing just now. Hopefully that does the trick.

Thanks for the helpful comment

Don't have anything helpful to add to the above.....coming from the mother whose 3yr old was heard muttering "fucking nightmare!" when she couldn't get her wee tights down in time for a pee "

Lmao it’s just how casually they say it

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By *areBares7778Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

Alch!! Sore one for mum to deal with and could only imagine what she is going through with the shock of it all and stress of how to deal with it.

Maybe challenge it head on, next quiet calm moment they have together maybe explain how bad the word fuck is and how it makes not just her but everyone feel when it is used.

Like something they maybe do together like swimming or going to the park and say to him when he asks to go to the park as an example if I say no but give the respond of no can you f..k, how would you feel and the feed back from him will be it's upsetting then when you use that word to mum I feel the same way, can we please stop using it as it is a really upsetting word.

Hope this advice maybe makes some kind of sense possibly help.

Tell your friend I hope this is just a quick small phase he is going through and it just passes very quickly.

Mr KB x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs "

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

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By *uietbloke67Man
over a year ago

outside your bedroom window ;-)


"If ignoring doesnt work id say she should try explain that only bad boys and girls say "fuck" then everytime he says it she reminds him mum doesnt like bad boys who use that word.. 4 yr olds dont like getting told their bad.. She should then praise him the less he says it.. Wee extra cuddles then hopfully his wee bad habit disappears.. No manual when you become a mum sadly so remind her of that..all kids pick up wee words they shouldnt say

That’s it exactly you have to wing it with kids. She does a really good job with him and this is totally out of character. She’s doing the ‘bad boys say that word’ thing just now. Hopefully that does the trick.

Thanks for the helpful comment

Don't have anything helpful to add to the above.....coming from the mother whose 3yr old was heard muttering "fucking nightmare!" when she couldn't get her wee tights down in time for a pee

Lmao it’s just how casually they say it "

He's a child. Ask him what he thinks he is saying and does he understand that saying words like that don't make him popular. Don't tell him he is bad. The last thing you want to do is convince a child he is bad when he doesn't know what he is bad for.

Don't punish him, talk to him.

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By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs "

Wow you came in asking for advice and your attitude towards comments that dont exactly match your requirments is way worse than that lad saying fuck.

Shes clearly not disiplining the boy , hes 4 so shes NOT a new parent, since its all softly softly approach these days , ground him for a decent time period at least 2 hours, no toys or tv , make him do chores. If used again increase these times 4 hrs 6 hrs etc. I guarantee dicipline will resume.

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By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

"

Sometimes you gotta agree, this is one of those occasions.

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

"

I hardly think posting on here asking for a bit of advice from those who have experienced it to be ‘hysterics’

At no point did I infer she had difficulty talking to him or was an insufficient parental figure. You assumed this based on your reasoning of me posting on here.

No tantrum here at all, you don’t impact my life in any way so to be bothered by your usual antagonistic postings would be pointless.

To be blunt I can’t be arsed with your ‘skirting the edge of what’s considered offensive/not allowed on the forum’ just to try and get a rise out of people. You’ve said your peace. It’s not advice that she isn’t doing already so it will be disregarded along with your pathetic attempts at making yourself look clever.

If my postings, hysterics or tantrums are not to your liking you know what to do....

Off you fuck

Mrs

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By *ak2Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

Social media ...,it’s shocking what they know at a young age they can work phones better than us old ones ... nothing teachers can do .... I have 3 kids insta / fb / the rest hardwork

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Wow you came in asking for advice and your attitude towards comments that dont exactly match your requirments is way worse than that lad saying fuck.

Shes clearly not disiplining the boy , hes 4 so shes NOT a new parent, since its all softly softly approach these days , ground him for a decent time period at least 2 hours, no toys or tv , make him do chores. If used again increase these times 4 hrs 6 hrs etc. I guarantee dicipline will resume. "
.

I have no problem with people having different opinions to me. I fail to see anywhere I have said that someone’s advice/opinion is wrong because it doesn’t match mine.

What I tried to clear up was that it was a thread looking for ways to deal with the behaviour not to figure out where he heard it.

The only thing I have taken umbridge with is the snide comment made making out that the mother lacked in parental skills. In my opinion that was just really lousy

Mrs

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By *rMrsWTFCouple
over a year ago

Arbroath

Oh just another thought guilt always worked with my kids if they seen that it upset me rather than angered me and my son has just reminded that I did once put a bar off soap in his mouth but that will probably be classed as child abuse these days but he says it worked 1 because he was shocked I did and 2 it tasted disgusting

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By *rMrsWTFCouple
over a year ago

Arbroath

P,S no one should be judged on parenting skills (unless they are neglecting or abusing said child) and by being concerned about this shows she's a good caring mother and has good friends in my opinion

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"Oh just another thought guilt always worked with my kids if they seen that it upset me rather than angered me and my son has just reminded that I did once put a bar off soap in his mouth but that will probably be classed as child abuse these days but he says it worked 1 because he was shocked I did and 2 it tasted disgusting "

That’s the issue these days. When I was wee I got my bum skelped and nowadays it’s all tap them on the backside and it’s abuse. Think you’re right the soap in the mouth trick would most likely be classed as abuse too.

Tbh it’s so out of character for him hence the shock value but I think the guilt thing might be the best way forward x

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"P,S no one should be judged on parenting skills (unless they are neglecting or abusing said child) and by being concerned about this shows she's a good caring mother and has good friends in my opinion "

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

I hardly think posting on here asking for a bit of advice from those who have experienced it to be ‘hysterics’

At no point did I infer she had difficulty talking to him or was an insufficient parental figure. You assumed this based on your reasoning of me posting on here.

No tantrum here at all, you don’t impact my life in any way so to be bothered by your usual antagonistic postings would be pointless.

To be blunt I can’t be arsed with your ‘skirting the edge of what’s considered offensive/not allowed on the forum’ just to try and get a rise out of people. You’ve said your peace. It’s not advice that she isn’t doing already so it will be disregarded along with your pathetic attempts at making yourself look clever.

If my postings, hysterics or tantrums are not to your liking you know what to do....

Off you fuck

Mrs "

Here's the point again.

So your friend is doing it already and it hasn't had effect??

You said he came home from nursery today and said it! TODAY. She's said it's a bad word to him and reinforced that. I assume he was in a bed by about 8 o'clock as he's 3. So she's had perhaps 5 hours or reinforcing it's a bad word and you're on here to find the solution and alternate strategy for a problem than isn't even a problem yet!!

Hysterical much???

So you disregard whatever you want princess it's your thread, I'm not bothered in the slightest. In fact that's about the first post you've made in a long time that I even bothered to read, I usually skip it and now I remember why.

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By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre


"Oh just another thought guilt always worked with my kids if they seen that it upset me rather than angered me and my son has just reminded that I did once put a bar off soap in his mouth but that will probably be classed as child abuse these days but he says it worked 1 because he was shocked I did and 2 it tasted disgusting "

You must be a terrible mother or father doing that,

Its not funny but its like the capital punishment like a skelp on the erse that worked years ago. Yes views have changed but as you say they never used foul language again. 1 taste of soap and it worked for the rest of the childs life until they knew and understood the meaning of those words. I sometimes swore in front of the kids and Mrs She D gave me a bollocking which taught our kids it was wrong to say it . They still dont swear as adults.

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

I hardly think posting on here asking for a bit of advice from those who have experienced it to be ‘hysterics’

At no point did I infer she had difficulty talking to him or was an insufficient parental figure. You assumed this based on your reasoning of me posting on here.

No tantrum here at all, you don’t impact my life in any way so to be bothered by your usual antagonistic postings would be pointless.

To be blunt I can’t be arsed with your ‘skirting the edge of what’s considered offensive/not allowed on the forum’ just to try and get a rise out of people. You’ve said your peace. It’s not advice that she isn’t doing already so it will be disregarded along with your pathetic attempts at making yourself look clever.

If my postings, hysterics or tantrums are not to your liking you know what to do....

Off you fuck

Mrs

Here's the point again.

So your friend is doing it already and it hasn't had effect??

You said he came home from nursery today and said it! TODAY. She's said it's a bad word to him and reinforced that. I assume he was in a bed by about 8 o'clock as he's 3. So she's had perhaps 5 hours or reinforcing it's a bad word and you're on here to find the solution and alternate strategy for a problem than isn't even a problem yet!!

Hysterical much???

So you disregard whatever you want princess it's your thread, I'm not bothered in the slightest. In fact that's about the first post you've made in a long time that I even bothered to read, I usually skip it and now I remember why. "

Well here’s hoping I can get back to posting stuff that doesn’t get the chip on your shoulder itching.

Again the post is being proactive. Find out other ways of dealing with it if he continues to say it.

I really don’t see what the big deal is but obviously I’ve clearly angered the forum gods by posting this.

Maybe I should of titled it ‘snog, fuck, pint, my child is swearing’ for a better reception

Mrs

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By *ictiiWitchCouple
over a year ago

Helensburgh

Some interesting people chipping in here...

From the perspective of someone trained to HNC level of childcare and education. 1st time he says it, ignore him, walk away and don't respond. 2nd time, get down to his level, look him square in the eyes and explain that the word he used isn't acceptable and ask him to explain what he meant by it (this has three benefits, he gets to feel listened to, she gets to really find out why he was saying it and also, as a deterrent because I haven't met a 4 year old yet that likes standing still long enough to explain) 3rd time, down look into eyes, tell him again that the word is unacceptable, explain that if he uses it again there will be consequences. 4th time, implement the consequences, don't speak to him about it, don't try to explain. If she uses the naughty step, just take his arm and put him on the naughty step. Don't say a word to him until his time is done, then back down to eye level and ask him if he knows why he was punished. Remind him at that point that if he does it again, he will get the same consequences. If he does it while outside, bring him home and put him in punishment. It might be a bit inconvenient for a while, but he should soon stop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve a rule in my house, if you hear a word and you don’t know what it means ask me. Even if you think it’s a swear/bad/naughty word.

If I tell you it’s a swear word or not a nice word and I hear you use it there will be consequences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

I hardly think posting on here asking for a bit of advice from those who have experienced it to be ‘hysterics’

At no point did I infer she had difficulty talking to him or was an insufficient parental figure. You assumed this based on your reasoning of me posting on here.

No tantrum here at all, you don’t impact my life in any way so to be bothered by your usual antagonistic postings would be pointless.

To be blunt I can’t be arsed with your ‘skirting the edge of what’s considered offensive/not allowed on the forum’ just to try and get a rise out of people. You’ve said your peace. It’s not advice that she isn’t doing already so it will be disregarded along with your pathetic attempts at making yourself look clever.

If my postings, hysterics or tantrums are not to your liking you know what to do....

Off you fuck

Mrs

Here's the point again.

So your friend is doing it already and it hasn't had effect??

You said he came home from nursery today and said it! TODAY. She's said it's a bad word to him and reinforced that. I assume he was in a bed by about 8 o'clock as he's 3. So she's had perhaps 5 hours or reinforcing it's a bad word and you're on here to find the solution and alternate strategy for a problem than isn't even a problem yet!!

Hysterical much???

So you disregard whatever you want princess it's your thread, I'm not bothered in the slightest. In fact that's about the first post you've made in a long time that I even bothered to read, I usually skip it and now I remember why.

Well here’s hoping I can get back to posting stuff that doesn’t get the chip on your shoulder itching.

Again the post is being proactive. Find out other ways of dealing with it if he continues to say it.

I really don’t see what the big deal is but obviously I’ve clearly angered the forum gods by posting this.

Maybe I should of titled it ‘snog, fuck, pint, my child is swearing’ for a better reception

Mrs "

Not really princess, we all gave our opinion, you're the one came off with a couple of ugly rants and flung in a few insults which demonstrated your lack of communication skill and how you deal with things when others have different opinions. And you said at the start you have no kids so, you're in no position to disregard any opinions.

The only angry person and indeed the only person who swore on this thread was little old you.

Glad you seem to have regained your composure and conveniently forgotten you're little wayward outburst. Reeked of frustration.

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"Some interesting people chipping in here...

From the perspective of someone trained to HNC level of childcare and education. 1st time he says it, ignore him, walk away and don't respond. 2nd time, get down to his level, look him square in the eyes and explain that the word he used isn't acceptable and ask him to explain what he meant by it (this has three benefits, he gets to feel listened to, she gets to really find out why he was saying it and also, as a deterrent because I haven't met a 4 year old yet that likes standing still long enough to explain) 3rd time, down look into eyes, tell him again that the word is unacceptable, explain that if he uses it again there will be consequences. 4th time, implement the consequences, don't speak to him about it, don't try to explain. If she uses the naughty step, just take his arm and put him on the naughty step. Don't say a word to him until his time is done, then back down to eye level and ask him if he knows why he was punished. Remind him at that point that if he does it again, he will get the same consequences. If he does it while outside, bring him home and put him in punishment. It might be a bit inconvenient for a while, but he should soon stop."

Thank you that’s really good advice that extends past the first instance, which I was looking for. I’ll pass it along

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some interesting people chipping in here...

From the perspective of someone trained to HNC level of childcare and education. 1st time he says it, ignore him, walk away and don't respond. 2nd time, get down to his level, look him square in the eyes and explain that the word he used isn't acceptable and ask him to explain what he meant by it (this has three benefits, he gets to feel listened to, she gets to really find out why he was saying it and also, as a deterrent because I haven't met a 4 year old yet that likes standing still long enough to explain) 3rd time, down look into eyes, tell him again that the word is unacceptable, explain that if he uses it again there will be consequences. 4th time, implement the consequences, don't speak to him about it, don't try to explain. If she uses the naughty step, just take his arm and put him on the naughty step. Don't say a word to him until his time is done, then back down to eye level and ask him if he knows why he was punished. Remind him at that point that if he does it again, he will get the same consequences. If he does it while outside, bring him home and put him in punishment. It might be a bit inconvenient for a while, but he should soon stop.

Thank you that’s really good advice that extends past the first instance, which I was looking for. I’ll pass it along

Mrs"

You're welcome! Reinforcement!

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

I hardly think posting on here asking for a bit of advice from those who have experienced it to be ‘hysterics’

At no point did I infer she had difficulty talking to him or was an insufficient parental figure. You assumed this based on your reasoning of me posting on here.

No tantrum here at all, you don’t impact my life in any way so to be bothered by your usual antagonistic postings would be pointless.

To be blunt I can’t be arsed with your ‘skirting the edge of what’s considered offensive/not allowed on the forum’ just to try and get a rise out of people. You’ve said your peace. It’s not advice that she isn’t doing already so it will be disregarded along with your pathetic attempts at making yourself look clever.

If my postings, hysterics or tantrums are not to your liking you know what to do....

Off you fuck

Mrs

Here's the point again.

So your friend is doing it already and it hasn't had effect??

You said he came home from nursery today and said it! TODAY. She's said it's a bad word to him and reinforced that. I assume he was in a bed by about 8 o'clock as he's 3. So she's had perhaps 5 hours or reinforcing it's a bad word and you're on here to find the solution and alternate strategy for a problem than isn't even a problem yet!!

Hysterical much???

So you disregard whatever you want princess it's your thread, I'm not bothered in the slightest. In fact that's about the first post you've made in a long time that I even bothered to read, I usually skip it and now I remember why.

Well here’s hoping I can get back to posting stuff that doesn’t get the chip on your shoulder itching.

Again the post is being proactive. Find out other ways of dealing with it if he continues to say it.

I really don’t see what the big deal is but obviously I’ve clearly angered the forum gods by posting this.

Maybe I should of titled it ‘snog, fuck, pint, my child is swearing’ for a better reception

Mrs

Not really princess, we all gave our opinion, you're the one came off with a couple of ugly rants and flung in a few insults which demonstrated your lack of communication skill and how you deal with things when others have different opinions. And you said at the start you have no kids so, you're in no position to disregard any opinions.

The only angry person and indeed the only person who swore on this thread was little old you.

Glad you seem to have regained your composure and conveniently forgotten you're little wayward outburst. Reeked of frustration. "

Yeah because saying someone has questionable parenting skills isn’t at all insulting is it?!

Now you’re questioning my communication skills lol I wouldn’t embarrass you by telling you the level of my education and capabilities.

Remind me when you’re starting your training classes on ‘how to force your opinion down everyone’s throat and be right about every topic in the world’ so that I can be dazzled by your wisdom.

Thankfully there has been some really useful advice given, which I’m very appreciative of but I’m pretty much done with arguing the toss with you. What is it they say? Don’t argue with an idiot, they will only drag you down and beat you with experience.

So continue to bang your drum about how I’m the bad one and you’re right (as always).

Whatever gets your dick hard mate

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By *areBares7778Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"Some interesting people chipping in here...

From the perspective of someone trained to HNC level of childcare and education. 1st time he says it, ignore him, walk away and don't respond. 2nd time, get down to his level, look him square in the eyes and explain that the word he used isn't acceptable and ask him to explain what he meant by it (this has three benefits, he gets to feel listened to, she gets to really find out why he was saying it and also, as a deterrent because I haven't met a 4 year old yet that likes standing still long enough to explain) 3rd time, down look into eyes, tell him again that the word is unacceptable, explain that if he uses it again there will be consequences. 4th time, implement the consequences, don't speak to him about it, don't try to explain. If she uses the naughty step, just take his arm and put him on the naughty step. Don't say a word to him until his time is done, then back down to eye level and ask him if he knows why he was punished. Remind him at that point that if he does it again, he will get the same consequences. If he does it while outside, bring him home and put him in punishment. It might be a bit inconvenient for a while, but he should soon stop.

Thank you that’s really good advice that extends past the first instance, which I was looking for. I’ll pass it along

Mrs"

good advice will pass this on to my sister to use with the kids

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By *iss_AvaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

I was in town with my 5 Yr old grandson. We were in pound land I think, he saw a cheap toy, asked for it and was told no. He said I want the fucking toy you fucking bastard nana,(i was trying so hard not to giggle at being called a bastard nana)cue a full on rant saying I'm not a proper nana, but I'm a bastard nana for not buying her “favourite boy" his toy. He was marched out the shop, sat down and I explained that it wasn't acceptable to use those words or talk to people the way he had. Now he was being punished by going straight home without the other toy I'd seen and was going to buy him, one he'd wanted for ages. He never even got his McDonald's treat meal. We had a chat at home where I explained they were very bads words and every time he used one, he'd lose a treat I had planned for him. I haven't heard him, neither has his mum using them in a few days. BTW, it came out he learned them from the older kids in school, they were telling the youngsters they were jokey words.

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"I was in town with my 5 Yr old grandson. We were in pound land I think, he saw a cheap toy, asked for it and was told no. He said I want the fucking toy you fucking bastard nana,(i was trying so hard not to giggle at being called a bastard nana)cue a full on rant saying I'm not a proper nana, but I'm a bastard nana for not buying her “favourite boy" his toy. He was marched out the shop, sat down and I explained that it wasn't acceptable to use those words or talk to people the way he had. Now he was being punished by going straight home without the other toy I'd seen and was going to buy him, one he'd wanted for ages. He never even got his McDonald's treat meal. We had a chat at home where I explained they were very bads words and every time he used one, he'd lose a treat I had planned for him. I haven't heard him, neither has his mum using them in a few days. BTW, it came out he learned them from the older kids in school, they were telling the youngsters they were jokey words.

"

That’s it you can have a sense of what is acceptable for your kid but can’t enforce that same standard on other parents. Some people do constantly swear around their kids then the kids start doing it and it gets passed on to other kids.

After his last outburst he got bathed and put to bed without getting to watch his cartoons before bed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hopefully its a one off and if not his mum has a good talk to him but it def doesnt make her a bad parent as we have all had to deal with this situation at some point its all part of parenting and brining kids up tell her not to fret too much about it hes a kid and will grow out of it

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By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre


"Some interesting people chipping in here...

From the perspective of someone trained to HNC level of childcare and education. 1st time he says it, ignore him, walk away and don't respond. 2nd time, get down to his level, look him square in the eyes and explain that the word he used isn't acceptable and ask him to explain what he meant by it (this has three benefits, he gets to feel listened to, she gets to really find out why he was saying it and also, as a deterrent because I haven't met a 4 year old yet that likes standing still long enough to explain) 3rd time, down look into eyes, tell him again that the word is unacceptable, explain that if he uses it again there will be consequences. 4th time, implement the consequences, don't speak to him about it, don't try to explain. If she uses the naughty step, just take his arm and put him on the naughty step. Don't say a word to him until his time is done, then back down to eye level and ask him if he knows why he was punished. Remind him at that point that if he does it again, he will get the same consequences. If he does it while outside, bring him home and put him in punishment. It might be a bit inconvenient for a while, but he should soon stop."

Very sound advice picti.

Some of my parenting skills would curl yer toes haha, but that said , all three turned out extremely well , balanced and now have extremely well behaved children of their own so we must have done something right. Some of my ideas are probably not for the public domain. Lol

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By *exy gentMan
over a year ago

Midlothian


"Just fucking ignore it "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thread wasn’t started as a debate on how he learned these words, it’s blatantly obvious he has heard them and subsequently repeated them. She will be trying to find out where he’s heard it to address that issue but is at a loss for how to stop him saying it now that he’s started

Is she incapable of tellinn him than Fuck is a bad word? Seriously?? If that's the extent of her parenting skills him saying fuck will soon be the least of her worries.

I didn’t think I would need to point out the obvious but apparently some want it spelled out for them.

Of course she has told him that but he has repeated it again so was simply looking for a more long term fix for it because just telling a 3 year old it’s a bad word is like water off a ducks back.

As for attaking the parenting skills of a woman you have never met and have no insight on, good job. You wanting a hat and a balloon too for that wee victory lap you’re doing in your room?

Remember attacking other people is always the best way to make you look like a big man after all.

Oh and before you try and throw this in the ring too to emphasis your ability to nit pick, she has NOT asked me to post this, I have done so of my own volition to see if there’s any good advice.

Mrs

Here's something for you.

He said it TODAY!! And you're posting TODAY in the biggest over reaction of all time!

He keeps saying it, she has to keep reinforcing that it's a bad word. That's how kids that age learn, reinforcement! It is not water off a ducks back and if it is, the wee boy may have other issues.

You are asking a load of strangers how a mother deals with her own child! No one on this forum has any insight into the relationship this friend of yours had with her son nor the social skills and intellectual development of the wee lad. At that age there can be a vast vast difference in the development of kids.

So you asked for advise. I said reinforce it's a bad word. No child likes to hear that. That is the "long term fix" for him right now less than 24 hrs after he first muttered the word fuck.

And if your friend doesn't know how to talk to her child no one on here will because they're a stranger.

You are the last person she should be asking for advice given your hysterics and overreaction to posting it here in the first place. Get a grip hat and balloon. You're behaving like a 3 year old having a tantrum now.

I hardly think posting on here asking for a bit of advice from those who have experienced it to be ‘hysterics’

At no point did I infer she had difficulty talking to him or was an insufficient parental figure. You assumed this based on your reasoning of me posting on here.

No tantrum here at all, you don’t impact my life in any way so to be bothered by your usual antagonistic postings would be pointless.

To be blunt I can’t be arsed with your ‘skirting the edge of what’s considered offensive/not allowed on the forum’ just to try and get a rise out of people. You’ve said your peace. It’s not advice that she isn’t doing already so it will be disregarded along with your pathetic attempts at making yourself look clever.

If my postings, hysterics or tantrums are not to your liking you know what to do....

Off you fuck

Mrs

Here's the point again.

So your friend is doing it already and it hasn't had effect??

You said he came home from nursery today and said it! TODAY. She's said it's a bad word to him and reinforced that. I assume he was in a bed by about 8 o'clock as he's 3. So she's had perhaps 5 hours or reinforcing it's a bad word and you're on here to find the solution and alternate strategy for a problem than isn't even a problem yet!!

Hysterical much???

So you disregard whatever you want princess it's your thread, I'm not bothered in the slightest. In fact that's about the first post you've made in a long time that I even bothered to read, I usually skip it and now I remember why.

Well here’s hoping I can get back to posting stuff that doesn’t get the chip on your shoulder itching.

Again the post is being proactive. Find out other ways of dealing with it if he continues to say it.

I really don’t see what the big deal is but obviously I’ve clearly angered the forum gods by posting this.

Maybe I should of titled it ‘snog, fuck, pint, my child is swearing’ for a better reception

Mrs

Not really princess, we all gave our opinion, you're the one came off with a couple of ugly rants and flung in a few insults which demonstrated your lack of communication skill and how you deal with things when others have different opinions. And you said at the start you have no kids so, you're in no position to disregard any opinions.

The only angry person and indeed the only person who swore on this thread was little old you.

Glad you seem to have regained your composure and conveniently forgotten you're little wayward outburst. Reeked of frustration.

Yeah because saying someone has questionable parenting skills isn’t at all insulting is it?!

Now you’re questioning my communication skills lol I wouldn’t embarrass you by telling you the level of my education and capabilities.

Remind me when you’re starting your training classes on ‘how to force your opinion down everyone’s throat and be right about every topic in the world’ so that I can be dazzled by your wisdom.

Thankfully there has been some really useful advice given, which I’m very appreciative of but I’m pretty much done with arguing the toss with you. What is it they say? Don’t argue with an idiot, they will only drag you down and beat you with experience.

So continue to bang your drum about how I’m the bad one and you’re right (as always).

Whatever gets your dick hard mate "

Certainly not you, that's for sure. Another high brow way to end a post. See a trend?

I never claimed to be right about this topic, but lots of other posters have essentially said the same thing in many more words than I have.

Level of education has little to do with communication skillls dear. For a woman who's posts are littered with irony and sarcasm you don't seem to pick up on that in return and you deal with it by "arguing" as you've said yourself above and insults. A sure sign you lost your credability to whatever your arguement actually was a long time ago. Use your "capabilities" to interpret that how you please.

FYI some of the most highly educated people I know are stupid and incapable and some of the least educated are exceptionally bright. So I can categorically clarify that you would not embarrass me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He'll be saying 'sprog' next.

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By *ittleMizzNaughty88.Woman
over a year ago

Renfrewshire


"Not for us I might add, we are sprogless.

My good friend has a wee boy who turns four next month. She is on her own with him and he is her first child. She has no previous experience with kids.

When asking her son something to day and him denying doing it she gave him into trouble and told him he lied, to which he responded....

NO I FUCKING DIDNT

She gave him into trouble then asked me for advise. I said it was out of character for him and maybe just ignore it as a one off.

Two hours later he comes out with.....

What you fucking talking about

And

What the fuck is all that about.

He’s never swore before and I’ve never heard anyone swear around him.

I’m positive those on here with kids will have experienced this so what’s the best way to handle it?

Mrs

"

Do he watch you tube?

Sometimes those wee innocent video's would turn the air blue.

Both my boys can go on YouTube but it comes through my email account what they are watching.

Best advice I can give is when he's using those words is say I can't speak to you when you are using those words. If that doesn't work reduce screen time. I'm on my own with my two. It's really hard work at times. So I feel her pain.

The wee one is probably trying to push boundaries like my two do.

Both of them have additional needs,people say I'm quite hard on them.

I'm dont think I am, the rules in my house are kind hands & kind words if they don't abide by that then they lose their gadgets.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

OK can people remember if you are going to post for advice, accept it won't always be what you want.

Please ignore each other now. Thanks

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

There isnt a best way there is only your way.

My kids were free to dowhat they wanted within the boundrys i set and harsh punishment if you crossed them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There isnt a best way there is only your way.

My kids were free to dowhat they wanted within the boundrys i set and harsh punishment if you crossed them "

You're as bad as HeDevil! Were they branded and sent to work down the pits for 6 months? "FUCKING SNOWFLAKES!"

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge


"There isnt a best way there is only your way.

My kids were free to dowhat they wanted within the boundrys i set and harsh punishment if you crossed them

You're as bad as HeDevil! Were they branded and sent to work down the pits for 6 months? "FUCKING SNOWFLAKES!" "
pmsl i never do dishes or any other task i dont like find an excuse for that child labour

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By *ugs and Junk OP   Couple
over a year ago

Bellshill


"Not for us I might add, we are sprogless.

My good friend has a wee boy who turns four next month. She is on her own with him and he is her first child. She has no previous experience with kids.

When asking her son something to day and him denying doing it she gave him into trouble and told him he lied, to which he responded....

NO I FUCKING DIDNT

She gave him into trouble then asked me for advise. I said it was out of character for him and maybe just ignore it as a one off.

Two hours later he comes out with.....

What you fucking talking about

And

What the fuck is all that about.

He’s never swore before and I’ve never heard anyone swear around him.

I’m positive those on here with kids will have experienced this so what’s the best way to handle it?

Mrs

Do he watch you tube?

Sometimes those wee innocent video's would turn the air blue.

Both my boys can go on YouTube but it comes through my email account what they are watching.

Best advice I can give is when he's using those words is say I can't speak to you when you are using those words. If that doesn't work reduce screen time. I'm on my own with my two. It's really hard work at times. So I feel her pain.

The wee one is probably trying to push boundaries like my two do.

Both of them have additional needs,people say I'm quite hard on them.

I'm dont think I am, the rules in my house are kind hands & kind words if they don't abide by that then they lose their gadgets.

"

No he doesn’t watch you tube just the cartoon channels on the tv.

She tried not reacting to it but he said it again. She pointed out it was a bad word etc and he shouldn’t be saying it but he said it again.

She’s told me this morning he is still saying it but she has took the approach of telling him he won’t get any birthday presents if he keeps it up. So far so good.

Thank you for your input

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When my kids step out of line I make it CRYSTAL CLEAR that they are in big trouble if they don't stop. I don't ask nicely, I fucking TELL THEM.

Next time he swears... tell her to bin something that he likes.....and threaten to bin something he loves next if he says it again and stick to her guns.

I was a single mum with my first born and raised my youngest alone too as his dad was in the army & constantly away.

I understand the difficulty of having to be the disciplinarian AND nurturer but she needs to find her own style now as he's at that age. If she shows any weakness now, she's going to struggle going forward, he'Lloyd end up walking all over him (I've seen many friends struggle with this although I never did....)

He's deliberatley pushing boundaries right now and needs to SEE consequences of some description.

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By *e gentle 100Woman
over a year ago

Bathgate

No one knows a child better than a parent as it's all trial and error to see what punishment works best, kids certainly know what buttons to push to get a parent angry or a reaction and the death stare always works wonders lol.

Fran xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excuse me that isn’t not a nice word go in your room I don’t want to speak to you till you can speak properly mummy is upset and then totally ignore him, kids hate being ignored

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

FYI I swear like a trooper but none of mine started swearing till they hit high school now it’s like they all have Tourette’s not just the middle one !

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By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre


"There isnt a best way there is only your way.

My kids were free to dowhat they wanted within the boundrys i set and harsh punishment if you crossed them

You're as bad as HeDevil! Were they branded and sent to work down the pits for 6 months? "FUCKING SNOWFLAKES!" "

Oi you watch it

The point people are missing about harsh punishments is this. After 1 or 2 harsh punishments at the outset of bad behaviour it was never required again as the tone of voice was enough after that. I talk a good game about an erse skelp or whatever but the reality is , is that it was rarely needed and a genuinely mean that . Maybe kola will have experienced the same thing , i dont know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There isnt a best way there is only your way.

My kids were free to dowhat they wanted within the boundrys i set and harsh punishment if you crossed them

You're as bad as HeDevil! Were they branded and sent to work down the pits for 6 months? "FUCKING SNOWFLAKES!"

Oi you watch it

The point people are missing about harsh punishments is this. After 1 or 2 harsh punishments at the outset of bad behaviour it was never required again as the tone of voice was enough after that. I talk a good game about an erse skelp or whatever but the reality is , is that it was rarely needed and a genuinely mean that . Maybe kola will have experienced the same thing , i dont know. "

Everybody has a different parenting style. I've never laid a hand on mine and never will....maybe I've just been lucky with easy kids, who knows. I do have a "look" and a tone to my voice which they both know means no messing.

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By *e DevilMan
over a year ago

Blantyre


"There isnt a best way there is only your way.

My kids were free to dowhat they wanted within the boundrys i set and harsh punishment if you crossed them

You're as bad as HeDevil! Were they branded and sent to work down the pits for 6 months? "FUCKING SNOWFLAKES!"

Oi you watch it

The point people are missing about harsh punishments is this. After 1 or 2 harsh punishments at the outset of bad behaviour it was never required again as the tone of voice was enough after that. I talk a good game about an erse skelp or whatever but the reality is , is that it was rarely needed and a genuinely mean that . Maybe kola will have experienced the same thing , i dont know.

Everybody has a different parenting style. I've never laid a hand on mine and never will....maybe I've just been lucky with easy kids, who knows. I do have a "look" and a tone to my voice which they both know means no messing."

And when they were 2 or 3 years old was it still tone of voice, ps i do totally believe you. Tone of voice wansnt always enough with us, as someone said earlier kids push boundaries constantly and sometimes cross them lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Negative reinforcement by ignoring the behaviour and positively reinforcing wanted behaviour can change the behaviour over time, some children when not getting enough attention will display behaviours like swearing to get a reaction, it. Is learned behaviour, but reacting camly and not reacting the child will stop the behaviour if it's not getting the desired reaction, everyone who has contact with the child needs to say the same thing in order to correct the behaviour there has to be consistency from all adults. Hope that helps always difficult with four years old who are mixing with other children and will pick up on anything that is different ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Negative reinforcement by ignoring the behaviour and positively reinforcing wanted behaviour can change the behaviour over time, some children when not getting enough attention will display behaviours like swearing to get a reaction, it. Is learned behaviour, but reacting camly and not reacting the child will stop the behaviour if it's not getting the desired reaction, everyone who has contact with the child needs to say the same thing in order to correct the behaviour there has to be consistency from all adults. Hope that helps always difficult with four years old who are mixing with other children and will pick up on anything that is different .."

Totally agree. May I add that they should explain to the child that this is not right and why it is not.

For instance ,"mum was upset that you used such a word. It is not a nice word and can upset people".

re enforce better more descriptive language.

Childern take in so much from there peers and surroundings. It is sometimes better to explain things. They will take it in more.

Of course the old naughty step can help from time to time too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She should calmly explain its not a nice word and it can upset people. Don't make a fuss over it otherwise he may keep doing it .

Then leave it and hope he doesn't do it again. She could mention it to the nursery incase he uses it there, they may know where it's coming from too

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By *uboCouple
over a year ago

East kilbride

A good skelp on the bum would have solved it but that is not allowed anymore.

Bloody snowflakes

Remember the threat of getting mouth washed out with soap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So who’s all still here some great replies as above I did give mine a good skelp! Slapped my daughter not that long ago and told school and social workers sorry folks but she deserved it she’s not daft and she’s got a cso on her for her attendance

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