FabSwingers.com forum: Verification

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Sorry can’t help... I don’t wanna infuse fun into your life

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By *ilveryFoxMan
over a year ago

Midlothian

"Sorry can’t help... I don’t wanna infuse fun into your life

Can you infuse some into mines Max?

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Sorry can’t help... I don’t wanna infuse fun into your life

Can you infuse some into mines Max?"

Nope! I don’t do infusions

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

What the sensible guy ^^^ says

Plus a lot of patience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol"

Go to socials, go to chat rooms on cam, you can be verified by cam. There's house parities and put a meet up and look for a social in a public place.

get chatting and get yourself seen, it definitely helps

good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol

Go to socials, go to chat rooms on cam, you can be verified by cam. There's house parities and put a meet up and look for a social in a public place.

get chatting and get yourself seen, it definitely helps

good luck OP

Listen to the wise man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming."

And some people don’t

Only inviting people who have been verified before usually stamps out the time wasters and the single men who seem to think this is instashag and assume that socials = sex. Most social organisers are very friendly and welcoming on fab (haven’t spoken to one who isn’t). And it’s easy to get a webcam verification - just go on the chat rooms!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

And some people don’t

I found the chatrooms to be very difficult to get on with. It always seems to be the same people, only interested in chatting to friends.

There was one social being organised on the west coast, recently, which I enquired about. I got blocked without reply, and found out afterwards about their verified only rule. I assume this was the reason I was blocked.

With the chatrooms, and this, I won't waste my time on people who won't even give me the time of day.

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By *tew008Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

And some people don’t

Not that easy been on a few times an no ones bothered

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

And some people don’t

Not that easy been on a few times an no ones bothered

Have you asked? I’m always happy to verify newbies who are on cam (with their face)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

And some people don’t

I found the chatrooms to be very difficult to get on with. It always seems to be the same people, only interested in chatting to friends.

With the chatrooms, and this, I won't waste my time on people who won't even give me the time of day.

I’ve only just started using the chat rooms but it does take a while to squeeze in as a lot of people are friends. The Scotland chat room isn’t busy normally, so maybe pop on when it’s quieter and get chatting. There’s plenty of people who are happy to verify people who need a verification if their on cam (face only for me)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have tried at different times, different days, different people, with the same result. I won't be repeating the exercise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have tried at different times, different days, different people, with the same result. I won't be repeating the exercise."

Okay. Well hopefully OP takes this advice on board

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By *tew008Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

And some people don’t

Not that easy been on a few times an no ones bothered

Have you asked? I’m always happy to verify newbies who are on cam (with their face)"

Yea, you just get a sarcy response. Although I would be sarcastic but still verify at least. If I see you I’ll message on the chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming.

And some people don’t

Not that easy been on a few times an no ones bothered

Have you asked? I’m always happy to verify newbies who are on cam (with their face)

Yea, you just get a sarcy response. Although I would be sarcastic but still verify at least. If I see you I’ll message on the chat."

Ah that’s surprising, is it in the Scotland chat room? Most of them are lovely in there. And yeah feel free, I’d be happy to verify if I’m online

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the Scots chat room is hard or don't seem friendly its because you are thinking it is that way.

Of course people know each other, why, because they come in regularly for a chat. If you find it difficult just sit and watch the conversations between a group of people and if the topic is of interest then add to it, I'm sure you'll then can get involved.

Any newbie is welcomed into the chat, except and I stress, except those idioms who want to direct or make smutty comments etc.. the scots chat room is what it says it is, its a chat room and not many use it to arrange meets or look for sex.

If you join the chat room and just say "looking to get verified", no one will bother as I'm sure they will like to chat first get to know a little about you then verify after.

I'm usually in the scots chat room and do I go into other rooms, yes, occasionally and I just sit and watch the conversation of people who are all friends, then if a topic interests me etc.. then I just in and people chat back so it can easily be done. it's really up to you, no one else.

what I will say regarding the big socials. the organisers, who can be any one are now stating that you must be verified but that does not mean you will get in. Does not mean you are guaranteed to get in as some have found out in the past because of their antics on fab. its really up to the person organising the social and remember anyone on fabswingers can organise a social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Re: chat - bullshit. On the ocassions I went in, I tried to strike up conversations, some with people I recognised from the forum, and got nowhere fast. It is cliquey and unless you have a vagina, you can forget it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you don't ser any contradiction in telling people to get themselves to a social to get verified, when organisers won't accept requests from people who are not verified?

It's not very inclusive, is it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you don't ser any contradiction in telling people to get themselves to a social to get verified, when organisers won't accept requests from people who are not verified?

It's not very inclusive, is it?"

No contradiction.

I've already said 'You can get verified in a chat room, any chat room infact'.

You can be considered if you are verified by cam, its seriously soooooo simple

Anyone claiming they can get verified, well what can I say. Seems there is a problem somewhere along the lines as I have verified newbies on cam in chat room, queen has stated she has done so and so has many others, so there's no problem there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you don't ser any contradiction in telling people to get themselves to a social to get verified, when organisers won't accept requests from people who are not verified?

It's not very inclusive, is it?

No contradiction.

I've already said 'You can get verified in a chat room, any chat room infact'.

You can be considered if you are verified by cam, its seriously soooooo simple

Opps and then when at a big social, you can be verified by actually meeting people during the social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I give up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give up."

That's up to you to give up.

Many have given up and left the site and many have stayed and continued to have a fantastic time.

I've just remember there's even a quiz night that anyone can come and join and you can get verified by meeting like minded people there. Think its in Paisley or Renfrew, some where near there.

There is no excuse for anyone complaining at not being verified or finding it hard to get verified.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people on here don't mind meeting people with no veris. It might seem like they are but they really aren't the be all and end all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people on here don't mind meeting people with no veris. It might seem like they are but they really aren't the be all and end all "

Agreed

Some people think that if they are verified that 'heavens gate' will open up for them. It wont, its just the same for verified or none verified you just need to get yourself out there.

What does being verified allow on fab:

Verified allows you to be in the search of people who are looking for 'verified only people' and allows you to go to a social that stats "verified only". being verified just makes people take a lot more notice of you that's theres less chance of you being fake etc.. although there is fakes out there with verifications.

Sure theres other benefits but cant remember but you can still have an enjoyable time on fab without being verified

Remember You never see a bad verification.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Re: chat - bullshit. On the ocassions I went in, I tried to strike up conversations, some with people I recognised from the forum, and got nowhere fast. It is cliquey and unless you have a vagina, you can forget it."

That's not true at all I myself and many others happily welcome newbies in the chat room

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you don't ser any contradiction in telling people to get themselves to a social to get verified, when organisers won't accept requests from people who are not verified?

It's not very inclusive, is it?"

There's not many socials that say verified users only happy to meet for a coffee this week if youre free and verify you but lose the negative Nellie attitude or you will struggle even with a verification

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people on here don't mind meeting people with no veris. It might seem like they are but they really aren't the be all and end all

Agreed

Some people think that if they are verified that 'heavens gate' will open up for them. It wont, its just the same for verified or none verified you just need to get yourself out there.

What does being verified allow on fab:

Sure theres other benefits but cant remember but you can still have an enjoyable time on fab without being verified

Remember You never see a bad verification.

On our old profile we left a veri that read "he turned up on time and looked like his pics" he never displayed it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you don't ser any contradiction in telling people to get themselves to a social to get verified, when organisers won't accept requests from people who are not verified?

It's not very inclusive, is it?

I'm not being negative, I am simply relating my experiences. The fact that the experiences have been negative doesn't come from my behaviour, but from those I have attempted to interact with. They are responsible for how they act, and I found THEM to be negative.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some great advice in this thread. Something that I will use and hopefully get a verification sometime soon.

Cheers folks xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you don't ser any contradiction in telling people to get themselves to a social to get verified, when organisers won't accept requests from people who are not verified?

It's not very inclusive, is it?

I'm not saying your being negative.

I personally have made it clear, given ideas on how to get verified.

Regarding the scots chat room. Maybe that's your experience the times you came in but you cannot class us all the same. I talk to any newbie who strikes up a conversation as do many, many others and have verified some when they asked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some great advice in this thread. Something that I will use and hopefully get a verification sometime soon.

Cheers folks xx"

Anytime mucker

but ffs, don't wear a mask if you come into the chat room on cam, you'll have people running for the hills thinking they being asked to join the WWF

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By *inUpGirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

As a social organisor eso for bug ones like xmas social myself and bearded blossom actually try n make time to meet people who arent verified so that we can say right ok we know your a real person not a timewaster or fake.

You cant expect eveyone to do all the work for you its got to be give and take x

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"It's all very well advising someone to go to a social, but when SOME people only allow verified members to go to their socials, it doesn't always help a newbie. It also doesn't seem very welcoming."

It is the organisers’ choice.

BUT... there are many other socials organised... IF... that is the OPs thing that he can attend and the organisers will verify everyone that they are newbies or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Folk here have chimed in with what they think and plenty of good advice has been given, it can be a slow process and quite frustrating at times.

Not wanting to be critical but you do seem to have a downer on the place right now like its not met your expectations. That in and of itself won't help get a meet or veri.

Best thing is to take things as they come and just get along for the ride, it will come along.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol"

It is a ridiculous set up. Total chicken and egg situation. I’m sure they have their reasons for it though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just out of curiosity, can single women verify off the bat without being verified? Can’t remember what it was as a couple though seem to think it was straight forward at the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just out of curiosity, can single women verify off the bat without being verified? Can’t remember what it was as a couple though seem to think it was straight forward at the time. "

No I don't think so, No one can verfi without being verified.

It's been like that a long time but I don't know how the every first person got verified. I've been on for over 10 years and verifications was in use then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol"

Had same problem when first started on here totally chicken and egg situ. U need to keep chipping away lots of frustrations ahead. I went to one of the clubs from here I got to meet a couple folk from fab who attend the club they were kind enough to verify me but even then still few and far between with chats. The ladies are brutal on here try being nice and your too boring then if u try to be crude then they block there’s no happy medium with them ur damned one way or another

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol

can understand what your saying.

but you went eh club route and you don't need verified to go along, just need to give your name and present id the same.

I get it when you say 'be too nice or be too crude, whatever way is too far the level'. Personally, I just say, be yourself, I don't change for people on here, take me for what I am, if they dot like it, kl, if they do kl. I'm just honest and respectful always, no matter what kind of time I have

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yip I messaged them booked a slot and when got there showed ID to show who I am. Then once in I chatted with people and had a laugh they were the ones that verified me. I am honest and genuinely nice guy even when trying to strike up a chat but u see posts from the ladies. Too many A holes on here timewasters etc you scream to yourself well fecking come chat to me then I’m not like them! Frustrating lol

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Yip I messaged them booked a slot and when got there showed ID to show who I am. Then once in I chatted with people and had a laugh they were the ones that verified me. I am honest and genuinely nice guy even when trying to strike up a chat but u see posts from the ladies. Too many A holes on here timewasters etc you scream to yourself well fecking come chat to me then I’m not like them! Frustrating lol "

You had to show an ID to get into a Social??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yip Cjs is on days throughout every week and you can go and meet and have a laugh, socialise and if they are on fab, become verified. Clubs not my scene so I never have gone to any.

No need to say your nice, just be yourself, people will eventually see who they like and who they don't. They may bypass you but don't feel bad about it that they met someone else who is an asshole, that persona has to learn from bad experiences as well so they can then look to find the genuine, nice ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You had to show an ID to get into a Social??

no, just talking about entering Cjs

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By *tew008Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Just out of curiosity, can single women verify off the bat without being verified? Can’t remember what it was as a couple though seem to think it was straight forward at the time.

No I don't think so, No one can verfi without being verified.

It's been like that a long time but I don't know how the every first person got verified. I've been on for over 10 years and verifications was in use then.

Person who started the veri’s would have been very busy to begin with.

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

You had to show an ID to get into a Social??

no, just talking about entering Cjs"

Ah! Got it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just out of curiosity, can single women verify off the bat without being verified? Can’t remember what it was as a couple though seem to think it was straight forward at the time.

No I don't think so, No one can verfi without being verified.

It's been like that a long time but I don't know how the every first person got verified. I've been on for over 10 years and verifications was in use then.

Person who started the veri’s would have been very busy to begin with.

We figure that out then we figure out how the dinosaurs started on the earth and how human beings started lollllll

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yip Cjs is on days throughout every week and you can go and meet and have a laugh, socialise and if they are on fab, become verified. Clubs not my scene so I never have gone to any.

Club not my scene either went along to get verified basically experienced it for first time don’t get me wrong I enjoyed my time there but do prefer the normal social drink then the comfort of my own or their bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

Ahem. *waves*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting verified is torture how's a guy supposed to meet someone without it.. Spoke to good few on here but no help lol"

Sorry can't help, I'd just end up getting banned again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

Ahem. *waves*

Prime example!

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

Ahem. *waves*

Prime example!

Waves also ..but then I'm not exactly a single male but the standards are the same lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

Ahem. *waves*

Prime example!

Waves also ..but then I'm not exactly a single male but the standards are the same lol "

Exactly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though."

It’s the best advice anyone could possibly give on fab to be honest

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though."

What else is there to say? Do guys want people to hold their hands and guide them through it for a year or two?

Come on, let’s be serious for a second.

I was a newbie too you know. But I managed it. If I can, anyone can.

You can’t always have everything given to you on a plate, sometimes you have to actually work for it you know.

Attention from a lady or couple is no different believe it or not.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

If you come in with a negative attitude then you won't get far. The chatrooms can be a little difficult at first but persevere, introduce yourself and keep joining in and people will get to know you.

Likewise using the forum and going to socials (not all are verified only) and clubs.

Effort = reward. When I first started here I didn't know anyone, so I got my arse along to the next social.

There is an Ayrshire social at the end of this month, and there's a Dundee Social for Halloween, then there will be Xmas socials. So a fair few to choose from.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though.

What else is there to say? Do guys want people to hold their hands and guide them through it for a year or two?

Come on, let’s be serious for a second.

I was a newbie too you know. But I managed it. If I can, anyone can.

You can’t always have everything given to you on a plate, sometimes you have to actually work for it you know.

Attention from a lady or couple is no different believe it or not.

think too many come on fab believing all they have to do is join and all they sex crazed women will be fawning over them at the first sight of a cock pic ..keep up the good work guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though.

What else is there to say? Do guys want people to hold their hands and guide them through it for a year or two?

Come on, let’s be serious for a second.

I was a newbie too you know. But I managed it. If I can, anyone can.

You can’t always have everything given to you on a plate, sometimes you have to actually work for it you know.

Attention from a lady or couple is no different believe it or not.

I have one that I don't do, only downfall on here. I don't chase.

but I am happy in my own skin so it is what it is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though.

What else is there to say? Do guys want people to hold their hands and guide them through it for a year or two?

Come on, let’s be serious for a second.

I was a newbie too you know. But I managed it. If I can, anyone can.

You can’t always have everything given to you on a plate, sometimes you have to actually work for it you know.

Attention from a lady or couple is no different believe it or not.

think too many come on fab believing all they have to do is join and all they sex crazed women will be fawning over them at the first sight of a cock pic ..keep up the good work guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you come in with a negative attitude then you won't get far. The chatrooms can be a little difficult at first but persevere, introduce yourself and keep joining in and people will get to know you.

Likewise using the forum and going to socials (not all are verified only) and clubs.

Effort = reward. When I first started here I didn't know anyone, so I got my arse along to the next social.

There is an Ayrshire social at the end of this month, and there's a Dundee Social for Halloween, then there will be Xmas socials. So a fair few to choose from."

Ayrshire is full as far as I'm aware, Dundee not sure yet and xmas is filling up fast

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

But you’ve been here aaaaaaaages Peter. So a lot of people know you. Same as me.

But think back to when you were new.

You made the effort to get to know people I bet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though.

What else is there to say? Do guys want people to hold their hands and guide them through it for a year or two?

Come on, let’s be serious for a second.

I was a newbie too you know. But I managed it. If I can, anyone can.

You can’t always have everything given to you on a plate, sometimes you have to actually work for it you know.

Attention from a lady or couple is no different believe it or not.

I'm not asking for anything on a plate, just pointing out the hypocrisy of certain things.

Personally, I couldn't give a tinkers cuss about verifications, just that I see the same nonsense told to newbies time and again, and how, in my own experience, it doesn't work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also fab is what you make of it. I know plenty of men with loads of verifications because they actually put the effort in, and don’t throw their toys out the pram with things don’t go their way

This very post shows you're not as welcoming and friendly as you'd like to think you are.

It's a good "filter thread", though.

What else is there to say? Do guys want people to hold their hands and guide them through it for a year or two?

Come on, let’s be serious for a second.

I was a newbie too you know. But I managed it. If I can, anyone can.

You can’t always have everything given to you on a plate, sometimes you have to actually work for it you know.

Attention from a lady or couple is no different believe it or not.

I'm not asking for anything on a plate, just pointing out the hypocrisy of certain things.

Personally, I couldn't give a tinkers cuss about verifications, just that I see the same nonsense told to newbies time and again, and how, in my own experience, it doesn't work. "

Well I’m sure you’ve tried absolutely everything and if it doesn’t work for you, maybe fab isn’t for you. However, in most cases if people take advice and put the effort in, it will work out for them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?"

I gave more detailed advice than that. But like I said, this advice works most of the time. Hopefully the OP (who we’re trying to give the advice too) will take it onboard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But you’ve been here aaaaaaaages Peter. So a lot of people know you. Same as me.

But think back to when you were new.

You made the effort to get to know people I bet "

yip and worse for me was I had to be totally discreet as I couldn't accom, as I lived with my sisters and her family and also my job, it would have caused problems if known I was on fab.

So yeah took my time, was still the same person I am today, hones and respectful and eventually things started to open up, so to speak

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?"

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?"

Listening to a clique.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?

Listening to a clique."

Then dont! Nobody is forcing you to take any advice which has been given to the OP

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?

Listening to a clique."

And there it is ..the infamous clique excuse ..let you into a little secret ...there is no clique Lol just because people come online chat and have some banter doesn't mean there's a clique ...anyone and everyone can join in ffs and those that do (and arent a knob) reap the benefits

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?

Listening to a clique.

Exactly

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?

Listening to a clique."

Right, so you think YOUR problem is listening to a clique? What about listening to what I said?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there really is a clique...it's pretty evident that some members are only welcoming to newer folk who tow the party line.

There were a few threads not so long back claiming that the trolls on the forum put newbies and others off posting.

Those thought to be the trolls have disappeared, stopped posting, or post less often.

There doesn't seem to be a new influx of folk posting as a result of this.

Most threads on the Scottish forum turn into a love-in with posters making it obvious they've met or at least communicate in private with each other, which as well as being a tad cringey, might also explain why new folk don't join in.

Re the verifications thing...a cam veri might not be taken that seriously by some, so don't know that advice is all that useful.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"I think there really is a clique...it's pretty evident that some members are only welcoming to newer folk who tow the party line.

There were a few threads not so long back claiming that the trolls on the forum put newbies and others off posting.

Those thought to be the trolls have disappeared, stopped posting, or post less often.

There doesn't seem to be a new influx of folk posting as a result of this.

Re the verifications thing...a cam veri might not be taken that seriously by some, so don't know that advice is all that useful.

To be honest, I couldn’t care less if people think there is a clique or not.

My question STILL stands....where do guys think they are going wrong?

If they tell me I may be able to offer MY advice to them.

It would be a lot more productive than moaning about a ‘clique’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It was an observation not a moan

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"It was an observation not a moan

Who said it was a moan? Tell me and I’ll kick their shins for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"where do guys think they are going wrong?

I'm not going wrong anywhere. I know this. I do not think it.

I don't need validation (or verification) from people who chose to ignore me in a chatroom, or set rules for socials that contradict the usual advice. My life, on or off fab, is not that sad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It was an observation not a moan

Who said it was a moan? Tell me and I’ll kick their shins for you

I'm not sure if that was supposed to be funny or an attempt to patronise me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It was an observation not a moan

Who said it was a moan? Tell me and I’ll kick their shins for you

It would be a lot more productive than moaning about a ‘clique’

Start kicking your own shins.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"where do guys think they are going wrong?

I'm not going wrong anywhere. I know this. I do not think it.

I don't need validation (or verification) from people who chose to ignore me in a chatroom, or set rules for socials that contradict the usual advice. My life, on or off fab, is not that sad."

So what’s the problem then?

The OP asked for help/advice. He got it from various people. You took exception to it all. You didn’t actually offer any help/advice to the OP, merely slagged off what was given by others.

I’m not quite sure what it is you are trying to achieve?

You are perfectly correct to not care about veris, lots of users don’t care less. But there are a lot that do and that may be the reason the OP asked for help.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

[Removed by poster at 05/09/18 18:47:19]

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"It was an observation not a moan

Who said it was a moan? Tell me and I’ll kick their shins for you

I'm not sure if that was supposed to be funny or an attempt to patronise me"

It was a genuine question.

Because not once have I seen anyone say you were moaning. I merely assumed someone had private messaged you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"where do guys think they are going wrong?

I'm not going wrong anywhere. I know this. I do not think it.

I don't need validation (or verification) from people who chose to ignore me in a chatroom, or set rules for socials that contradict the usual advice. My life, on or off fab, is not that sad.

So what’s the problem then?

The OP asked for help/advice. He got it from various people. You took exception to it all. You didn’t actually offer any help/advice to the OP, merely slagged off what was given by others.

I’m not quite sure what it is you are trying to achieve?

You are perfectly correct to not care about veris, lots of users don’t care less. But there are a lot that do and that may be the reason the OP asked for help. "

Exactly. I could understand if this was your thread but people have offered lovely and practical advice and you have told us all that we are basically wrong and none of it helps, when I know fine well it does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can get cam verified op or just visit a club and mingle, I have attended a club on several occasions myself and put myself out there so to speak so I could meet People.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It was an observation not a moan

Who said it was a moan? Tell me and I’ll kick their shins for you

I'm not sure if that was supposed to be funny or an attempt to patronise me

It was a genuine question.

Because not once have I seen anyone say you were moaning. I merely assumed someone had private messaged you"

You mentioned people moaning about cliques

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"where do guys think they are going wrong?

I'm not going wrong anywhere. I know this. I do not think it.

I don't need validation (or verification) from people who chose to ignore me in a chatroom, or set rules for socials that contradict the usual advice. My life, on or off fab, is not that sad.

So what’s the problem then?

The OP asked for help/advice. He got it from various people. You took exception to it all. You didn’t actually offer any help/advice to the OP, merely slagged off what was given by others.

I’m not quite sure what it is you are trying to achieve?

You are perfectly correct to not care about veris, lots of users don’t care less. But there are a lot that do and that may be the reason the OP asked for help. "

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"where do guys think they are going wrong?

I'm not going wrong anywhere. I know this. I do not think it.

I don't need validation (or verification) from people who chose to ignore me in a chatroom, or set rules for socials that contradict the usual advice. My life, on or off fab, is not that sad.

So what’s the problem then?

The OP asked for help/advice. He got it from various people. You took exception to it all. You didn’t actually offer any help/advice to the OP, merely slagged off what was given by others.

I’m not quite sure what it is you are trying to achieve?

You are perfectly correct to not care about veris, lots of users don’t care less. But there are a lot that do and that may be the reason the OP asked for help.

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour."

I’m barely ever on the chatrooms so I haven’t made ‘friends’ so happy to chat with everyone. It takes persistence.

And there’s no cliques here! Some people get on with other people, doesn’t mean there’s a clique

All we have tried to do is offer OP advice. No need to be negative

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

"It was an observation not a moan

Who said it was a moan? Tell me and I’ll kick their shins for you

I'm not sure if that was supposed to be funny or an attempt to patronise me

It was a genuine question.

Because not once have I seen anyone say you were moaning. I merely assumed someone had private messaged you

You mentioned people moaning about cliques

No, I said I couldn’t care less if people think there is a clique. I said it because it isn’t helping the OP with his original question.

Nor was it helping the other poster.

That’s why I was asking them both more probing questions in the hope that I may be able to offer them some different advice from my perspective.

But like all advice I give, it is from MY perspective and people are more than welcome to completely ignore it if they so wish

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour."

I certainly agree with you re the chat rooms being too fast paced and confusing. I don’t use them for those very reasons.

As for socials - the organizers spend their own time organizing them and are free to set any rules they wish to in order to make their social a success. It does not mean that ALL socials are arranged the same way, they’re not.

But my question STILL stands. Is there anything you feel may help you or wish to have some crappy advice given about?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour.

I certainly agree with you re the chat rooms being too fast paced and confusing. I don’t use them for those very reasons.

But my question STILL stands. Is there anything you feel may help you or wish to have some crappy advice given about? "

If you care to read back, you'll see I don't need help from you or anyone else. There is no point in you asking questions that have already been answered, other than for you to try to feel superior.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour.

I certainly agree with you re the chat rooms being too fast paced and confusing. I don’t use them for those very reasons.

But my question STILL stands. Is there anything you feel may help you or wish to have some crappy advice given about?

If you care to read back, you'll see I don't need help from you or anyone else. There is no point in you asking questions that have already been answered, other than for you to try to feel superior. "

If you don’t need help why are you telling us the advice we are giving us rubbish? If you’re doing well then maybe you should give OP advice

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour.

I certainly agree with you re the chat rooms being too fast paced and confusing. I don’t use them for those very reasons.

But my question STILL stands. Is there anything you feel may help you or wish to have some crappy advice given about?

If you care to read back, you'll see I don't need help from you or anyone else. There is no point in you asking questions that have already been answered, other than for you to try to feel superior.

If you don’t need help why are you telling us the advice we are giving us rubbish? If you’re doing well then maybe you should give OP advice

Now there’s an idea

Feel superior? Me?

I’ve never felt superior to ANYONE in my life. Pmsfl.

Oh, if you didn’t want any advice, why post negative comments? Why not offer your own words of wisdom to the OP? Give him the benefit of your own experience.

Or is it a secret you don’t wish to share?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered. I was not the only person to say here that it doesn't work.

The people in the chatroom were only interested in talking to their friends, and social organisers who don't want to help the unverified are clearly intent on maintaining some exclusivity.

Both of these are examples of what I understand to be cliques. If you don't like the term, don't indulge in the behaviour.

I certainly agree with you re the chat rooms being too fast paced and confusing. I don’t use them for those very reasons.

But my question STILL stands. Is there anything you feel may help you or wish to have some crappy advice given about?

If you care to read back, you'll see I don't need help from you or anyone else. There is no point in you asking questions that have already been answered, other than for you to try to feel superior.

If you don’t need help why are you telling us the advice we are giving us rubbish? If you’re doing well then maybe you should give OP advice

Now there’s an idea

Feel superior? Me?

I’ve never felt superior to ANYONE in my life. Pmsfl.

Oh, if you didn’t want any advice, why post negative comments? Why not offer your own words of wisdom to the OP? Give him the benefit of your own experience.

Or is it a secret you don’t wish to share? "

I've already explained it clearly enough, even for the hardest of thinking. Get someone else to spell it out for you.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered.

I've already explained it clearly enough, even for the hardest of thinking. Get someone else to spell it out for you."

No you didn’t, you simply pointed out the futility of the ‘advice’ regularly offered.

At no point did you offer any of your own, just merely disagreed with others advice - which is perfectly fair enough.

It just would have been nicer if instead of all the vitriol you had just offered a few kind words of advice to the OP.

Now if you don’t mind, I have to be off to my own little world of jelly bean grass. (You’ll have to ask around, there’s bound to be someone on Fab who will know what I mean).

Au revoir

(Sorry if I spelt it wrong Max

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The advice I gave the OP, and have repeated throughout this thread, is don't waste your time with the clique's "advice". If the advice they give is the best they can do, they'd be as well not bothering

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The advice I gave the OP, and have repeated throughout this thread, is don't waste your time with the clique's "advice". If the advice they give is the best they can do, they'd be as well not bothering"

It’s advice given to plenty of men who have taken it on board and have done well on fab. There’s absolutely no need to be so negative, if you have no issue with meets, verifications etc maybe give your own advice instead of telling people to ignore ours, which is very helpful.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

So apart from negative advice, any POSITIVE advice for the OP?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it matter if there is different views on how to have a verification and meets and fun etc...

Put it this way, there are tons of people who have had and continue to have great time on fab but do they all use the same methods, time taken where they have fun, socials, clubs, one on one meets ect... No they dont. So the Op has made a statement and people have come on and given advice on how to get verified and what they see as how to have a great time on here. If the Op takes the advice and it works, great, If the Op takes the advice and it does not work then sorry, hopefully there are a methods on how to get verified that will work for the OP and everyoe else.

Theres a difference of opinion, so what, put your view, the reason why and thats it, let the Op persuse over all the options and see if any might work from him

Good luck Op if you stay and eventually get verified,

, I'm sorry if you decide to leave if you dont think the site is for you

One thing for sure, people who are negative, especially on the forums will just find it really hard or wittle down their chocie of people who will want to mix with them, who view their posts as negative. Just saying like but hell, what so I know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

#get a life

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Your advice has been to use the chatroom or go to a social. I've done that. It didn't work. What part of that don't you get?

Ok, so the ‘general advice’ didn’t work for you.

If it worked for me and lots of others, where do YOU think you’re going wrong?

Listening to a clique.

Amen to that

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I'm simply pointing out the futility of the "advice" regularly offered.

I've already explained it clearly enough, even for the hardest of thinking. Get someone else to spell it out for you.

No you didn’t, you simply pointed out the futility of the ‘advice’ regularly offered.

At no point did you offer any of your own, just merely disagreed with others advice - which is perfectly fair enough.

It just would have been nicer if instead of all the vitriol you had just offered a few kind words of advice to the OP.

Now if you don’t mind, I have to be off to my own little world of jelly bean grass. (You’ll have to ask around, there’s bound to be someone on Fab who will know what I mean).

Au revoir

(Sorry if I spelt it wrong Max

Red tick

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Hopefully the OP will make sense of it all and stick with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been on Fab for an age. Regular in chat rooms. Cam in chat rooms. Chat to others. Meet socially in Fetish clubs. I have no verifications what so ever!!

Never asked. Never really bothered if I got any either. Do I care?

No. Does it matter? No.

How you communicate with others here and socially will get you accepted more than a 2 line piece of text notch of the bed post.

Mistress Amelia

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I normally have mine hidden but have a couple on display the now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Back in the early days of fab it was easy as pie to get a verification, I had 3 my 1st month on here “all meets & not a 1 was a social” & back then I was 19yo & 3stone heavier than I am now

Nowadays it’s very hard for single guys, but it’s just 1 of those things so ye either accept it & do your best or you leave

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