FabSwingers.com forum: Danger

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thought I would post this as I am worried about the increase in violence towards members from not just this site but another site too.

If you have read the status updates you probably noticed a member was attacked by her meet at the weekend. Completely shocking but it brings to mind that this is not just the only one I heard about.

A good few months ago another member was attacked by a man she went to meet but refused to go home with him. Now before you say it's just the guys attacking the girls I spoke to a guy from the other site who went to meet a female member and he was attacked by her after refusing give her sex because all she was after was to get pregnant.

Now I have to ask are these just random attacks or is it rather common on sites like this.??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's horrific!

Sadly I think it may come with the territory. You never know who you're really talking to on here. If you read some of the threads and see the verbal abuse that some site users receive,I can unfortunately imagine that things can sometimes turn violent when a meet doesn't go the way someone planned.

Doubt very much I'd ever be on here as a single female for that very reason.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

Unless there is solid proof of any of these events I would take these things with a pinch of salt.

In which case if a crime has been committed it should be reported immediately to the authorities.

Common sense prevails and there are many ways to prevent such things happning.

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By *ally_weaverMan
over a year ago

Stoneyburn

AFRICAN KILLER BEES!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a fem that does meet alone it is always in your mind something like that could happen.

But.

So is it when a single guy is knocking on a door really not knowing who is behind it?

That's why I always insist on a public social meet 1st.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"As a fem that does meet alone it is always in your mind something like that could happen.

But.

So is it when a single guy is knocking on a door really not knowing who is behind it?

That's why I always insist on a public social meet 1st."

Yeah it does make sense to meet in public first. Have always done first apart from one time I got invited to the womans house and I was worried it would not be her opening the door. Luckily it was. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To us it comes down to how you trust yourself to act in any given situation, having a social first would not stop anything bad happening after that in another meet. We will still be happy to have people at ours for a first meet.

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By *inUpGirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

This is why i always meet socially first although thats not to say that it always happens the first time you meet someone.

Its not just fab that runs the risk it could happen if you met someone from a dating site, its the same your meeting someone that youve only spoke to online.

Thankfully ive never had any bad instances and usually follow my gut n take my time before i meet anyone. However if it did happen i would be reporting it to authorities regardless of where i met the person x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never had a problem ever with violence in meeting anyone from fab or off fab.

Usually I'll chat for a bit first, meet someone for a social and get a feel for them.

Only once I've left a social meet early with a gut feeling and it turned out to be right.

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By *utdooryoneMan
over a year ago

Over there

I'm with the poster that suggests rumor Vs fact.

That said, this is why I meet publicly at first for coffee or pint. Even 'normal' dates this is sensible.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never had a problem ever with violence in meeting anyone from fab or off fab.

Usually I'll chat for a bit first, meet someone for a social and get a feel for them.

Only once I've left a social meet early with a gut feeling and it turned out to be right.

Ohh what happened after you left like?

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By *earded blossomCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

Just me or is someone fishing?

John

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

Innocent till proven guilty is all Im going to say

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By *is vixen at playCouple
over a year ago

Dundee

Over the years I've been here I've heard of incidents but they do seem rare.

As a female who meets alone, a lot of talking first and a social is essential. If I don't feel completely comfortable then a play meet won't happen

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By *rgoodnbadMan
over a year ago

greenock

Never heard about anyone being attacked on this or other sites.

Of course it can happen, there are some nut jobs out there, but did this really occur?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never heard about anyone being attacked on this or other sites.

Of course it can happen, there are some nut jobs out there, but did this really occur?

Its on the updates/status part of this site. Still a status from 13 hours ago saying she has the start of a black eye and maybe cracked rib.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never had a problem ever with violence in meeting anyone from fab or off fab.

Usually I'll chat for a bit first, meet someone for a social and get a feel for them.

Only once I've left a social meet early with a gut feeling and it turned out to be right.

Ohh what happened after you left like? "

Wasn't straight after. But he got the jail for violence charges with 6 different woman, mainly from online dating sites.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Over the years I've been here I've heard of incidents but they do seem rare.

As a female who meets alone, a lot of talking first and a social is essential. If I don't feel completely comfortable then a play meet won't happen

V "

Agree these things are rare and they can happen online or in the real world.

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By *mberbCouple
over a year ago

Lothians

you will find a lot of attacks will go unreported due to being on this site or indeed being married and this is what some people will play on! cant report it the husband/wife will find out pepper spray is good Ladies..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know of one really bad incident, won't mention the details as it wasn't me. However I did have a guy threaten someone I met for no reason other than I had met him. There is a danger in most things, but here... cannot emphasise good vetting enough, if someone doesn't understand that then they are no worth meeting. That goes for both sexes!!

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By *erigoodMan
over a year ago

glasgow

Another one been on too much sauce at weekend, I’m not sure what your going to do with the info to be honest, are you going to spread the word,

If i have a meet this week fancy going round and doing a stake out so I know it’s all good,

Without the green tick your already going to come under the spotlight with your intent? Just saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Terrible to hear that kind of thing happening on here, but if anyone is looking to hire an escort/bodyguard for these type of initial first meets check my profile out and we can come to some kind of arrangement

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By *iceandtightMan
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Thing you have to consider as well is that this kind of thing could happen with someone you meet at a bar (almost more likely due to alcohol being involved) or even with someone youve known for years. I agree with the previous poster, be confident in yourself and in your situation and take any precautions you can to stay safe. At the same time you cant live your life in cotton wool or you wont experiance life. x x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Social first, always alcohol free, always drive and always sorry if this offends I don’t care about discretion when I’m a single female, someone will always know who I’m I’m meeting and where, yes my friends don’t need to know a persons life story but when it comes to my own personal safety I take as many precautions as possible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a guy I know a number of years ago was locked up and beaten by a cpl Who used bear spray on his and he escaped naked and picked up by a lorry driver or something was in the papers the cpl im sure both got jail time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

High voltage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone should carry an attack alarm, pepper spray and probably an axe on every meet.

We'd all be a lot safer then.

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By *earded blossomCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"There was a guy I know a number of years ago was locked up and beaten by a cpl Who used bear spray on his and he escaped naked and picked up by a lorry driver or something was in the papers the cpl im sure both got jail time "

I know this guy... he went through a terrible time

K x

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I just think we should just all be aware of the dangers involved and never let out guard down. I have a meet with an unverified male this week which is a first for me but a risk im willing to take.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just think we should just all be aware of the dangers involved and never let out guard down. I have a meet with an unverified male this week which is a first for me but a risk im willing to take. "

"A risk"???

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By *r humanMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

That why if was meet some from fab rather go club then meet at home or in pub not know look can be deceptive and easy spot there weirdos

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By *arroness NikkiWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

I've never had any issues so far, but yeah thinking about it now (meeting someone you have never met before) this is always something that could happen. But putting it in perspective there must be must be hundreds (maybe thousands) of meets that take place every week/month that happen with a hitch. A cliche i know but gut feeling (and plenty of chat & research) goes a long way.

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

"Everyone should carry an attack alarm, pepper spray and probably an axe on every meet.

We'd all be a lot safer then. "

I did that

In retrospect i do see now that it probably looked a bit aggresive

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By *eADevilCouple
over a year ago

Blantyre

"I just think we should just all be aware of the dangers involved and never let out guard down. I have a meet with an unverified male this week which is a first for me but a risk im willing to take.

"A risk"???

Cmon ,she said the word risk as it technically is a risk. The same risk as you have getting off a bus or walking home from the supermarket. Im sure she has thought it through logically, what is the 'risk' , what is the likelihood of it happening, how can i minimise anything happening or how can i prevent it from happening. We all do risk assessments every single day . Meeting someone new is not high on that list. Yes someone may have been attacked and its not acceptable but 10s of thousands of members statically it will happen. More Fab doom and gloom i feel.

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

There are risks in everything and while we all like to think you take all the right steps to minimise it, you can never eliminate it.

People get attacked by people they know, it's not always strangers.

When I was meeting I would ensure someone knew where I was going, who with and we would do check-in. It made me feel a little more confident but that's really as much as you can do.

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I just think we should just all be aware of the dangers involved and never let out guard down. "

I agree. I'll not give details as it did not happen to me but... things do happen... during first meet, during a second meet with the same person and even in Clubs!

So we all have to be vigilant that we are swingers or not for that matter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have had a few showdowns in the past with two guys in hotel rooms who were chancing their luck and could have got more aggressive had I not literally called reception. However I'm a fairly assertive person and don't take nonsense from people generally. I wouldn't go to anyone's home and feel safer in a hotel room - particularly when it's me who booked it

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By *eADevilCouple
over a year ago

Blantyre

"I have had a few showdowns in the past with two guys in hotel rooms who were chancing their luck and could have got more aggressive had I not literally called reception. However I'm a fairly assertive person and don't take nonsense from people generally. I wouldn't go to anyone's home and feel safer in a hotel room - particularly when it's me who booked it"

Can see how this senario could go bad very quickly. If you met them earlier in a bar then went to a hotel room then in some guys eyes it would be game on. And if you invited them to your room direct it gives the same impression . Think from a female point of view your on a lose lose situation. You would really need some sort of hidden panic alarm for both those situations, just in case. Relying on getting to a phone for reception is a risky strategy. Not saying you done ANYTHING wrong but would recommend extra precautions. He Devil x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They were just a couple of chancers who thought that an invitation to a hotel room was the green light for doing what they wanted to me. Admittedly one had consumed too many gins but I had met them both socially before. However calling reception certainly worked although I did end up pushing one of the guys out the door before security came.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/02/18 10:32:34]

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