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A suspicious society

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I believe we live in an over suspicious society!

Today as I was working door to door I knocked a door and the daughter answered, I asked if her mum was in, she said no. So I asked if she could let me use her toilet, I do this quite a lot during a week, I showed my id badge. After tht we started chattin, I later was walking to my car, the girl was leaving the house and I asked was she off shopping, she said yes down in to paisley. I was about to drive to another area passing the town so I asked if she would like a lift, she politely said no, I said no probs and carried on my way.....then I received a call from my manager asking me about it! The girl told her mum and her mum made a complaint to my head office! Now, I understand tht she didn't know me and thinking bk now I realize that it must've sounded suspicious to her mum, but c'mon can't people offer others a lift these days?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What age was this girl?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As long as the girl was over 16 I dont see anything wrong with offering a lift.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

She was at uni about 18 or 19

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I understand where you're coming from mate but in this day and age it's a bit unusual to offer strangers lifts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're lucky the mother has only called your Head Office, I'd have been on the phone reporting you to the police....asking a young girl if you can come into the house THEN offering her a lift.

You coulda found yourself on Crimewatch matey.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

[Removed by poster at 30/06/11 18:01:19]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Offering a lift is not worth your job is it.

Large company glasgow wide, has some zealous managers who like to stick the boot in when they can.

Smoking in a company vehicle, vehicle outwith its designated working area, offering lifts to family or friends who are uninsured.

In saying that if you are all alone in your job, no witness to back u your side of any story told.

If in doubt play safe, there are some nasty folk who tell porkies.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I believe we live in an over suspicious society!

Today as I was working door to door I knocked a door and the daughter answered, I asked if her mum was in, she said no. So I asked if she could let me use her toilet, I do this quite a lot during a week, I showed my id badge. After tht we started chattin, I later was walking to my car, the girl was leaving the house and I asked was she off shopping, she said yes down in to paisley. I was about to drive to another area passing the town so I asked if she would like a lift, she politely said no, I said no probs and carried on my way.....then I received a call from my manager asking me about it! The girl told her mum and her mum made a complaint to my head office! Now, I understand tht she didn't know me and thinking bk now I realize that it must've sounded suspicious to her mum, but c'mon can't people offer others a lift these days? "

Thats ok for you to say when all you had were good intentions,

but in all honesty Id badges can be made up very easily and to ask a young girl if you could entre the house when she had just told you her parents were out would have made any young girl nervous but to then follow that up by offering her a lift would only have risen suspicions further yes maybe people are suspicious these day and should be quite rightly so .

The first thing we tell our kids when they are young in never to speak to or go off with a stranger and that is instilled with them even as they get older and going out to pubs and clubs etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you need to take a step back and think about how bad this is ... if you knocked on my door and asked my daughter if you could come in then offered her a lift I would have called the police far less you Head Office!!!! How on earth you think thats acceptable is beyond me, yea your intentions were maybe good in your eyes but seriously .....

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

I think you are lucky you didn't get a visit from the police too.

I visit properties on a near daily basis with the contracts I am working on just now (ID badge always on show) and wouldn't dream of asking the tenant, never mind their daughter, if I could use their toilet and as for offering someone a lift who I have just met 5 minutes earlier; nope never!

Both situations could just leave you open to allsorts of accusations so a definite no no!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Big mistake m8, u should know better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe you shouldve got her to sign up and read your profile then she wouldnt have been so hasty to decline a lift from a total stranger. Phrases like need sex today, total nutjob and mad man wouldve put the irrational girl at ease.

Seriously, you need to have a severe word wi yirself. Im sure there must be public toilets on your route aswell as McDonalds etc you could pop in to.

No idea what you do but if I was your boss Id have your coat on a very shoogly peg for rather innappropriate and unprofessional behaviour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont get this at all, for various reasons, im 45, never in my life have i had a door to door anyone knock my door asking to use the loo!!

I once got instantly suspicious of a second gas meter reader showing up within 24 hours of the previous one,and lookin back on it, he said bugger all to assure me he was the real thing,just fed me a story on how it must of been an admin cock up and "anyway can i just get in to read it again"? Only cause i quickly reached the conclusion i have nowt worth nicking and im a bloke of 45 i thought, he might as well, but imagine the confusion/anxiety that nonsense causes some poor old lady for example.

So i hope you see how knocking a door, checkin nobody else is in then wanting in!!!???? is daft (puting it politely)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

what i dont get is she felt safe enough to let you in the house to use the toilet but not safe enough to accept a lift , did she tell her mum she let you into the house ?

a bit strange to say the least .

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside


"what i dont get is she felt safe enough to let you in the house to use the toilet but not safe enough to accept a lift , did she tell her mum she let you into the house ?

a bit strange to say the least ."

She probably said yes before she realised how stupid it was to say it though and then took a thought to herself at how silly she had been.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You're lucky the mother has only called your Head Office, I'd have been on the phone reporting you to the police....asking a young girl if you can come into the house THEN offering her a lift.

You coulda found yourself on Crimewatch matey."

He might yet. The next time anything unpleasant happens around that street - the girl or her mum might think back to the guy who wanted to pee then offered a lift.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

20 years ago, what the OP did would of been perfectly acceptable and in some areas of the UK would still be just someone been friendly.

Its the OP's intentions that are honurable but the daughter/mum/head office 'assume' that they are not.

We cant live our lives assuming that people that are been friendly are after something.

I regularily stop and help if i see women broken down at the side of the road, especially if they are stranded in a dangerous location. Many guys wont for fear of been accused of something. My way of thinking is that the NEXT guy who stops could be a rapist or want to attack/mug her.

Its not the OP that did anything 'wrong', its the nature of todays society that are twisted to beleive that every male, confronted with a young girl is going to attack/rape her.

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You're lucky the mother has only called your Head Office, I'd have been on the phone reporting you to the police....asking a young girl if you can come into the house THEN offering her a lift.

You coulda found yourself on Crimewatch matey."

And what crime exactly did the OP commit.

He asked to use the loo, she said yes. He offered her a lift, she said no, he walked away. Is there a crime?

S.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo

Sadly in this day and age, I wouldn't have let you into my house for you to use the toilet. As someone else said, wether you have ID or not, you are still a stranger to me.

If was my daughter at 18 letting someone into the house, I would have told her the dangers plus done the same thing as the mother, complained about you.

Surely there must be public places where you can use the loo.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"20 years ago, what the OP did would of been perfectly acceptable and in some areas of the UK would still be just someone been friendly.

Its the OP's intentions that are honurable but the daughter/mum/head office 'assume' that they are not.

We cant live our lives assuming that people that are been friendly are after something.

I regularily stop and help if i see women broken down at the side of the road, especially if they are stranded in a dangerous location. Many guys wont for fear of been accused of something. My way of thinking is that the NEXT guy who stops could be a rapist or want to attack/mug her.

Its not the OP that did anything 'wrong', its the nature of todays society that are twisted to beleive that every male, confronted with a young girl is going to attack/rape her.

Steve"

Found myself in both situtions recently, 2 students at side of road, car on fire, knew i had decent extinguisher, so tried to help, could'nt believe the amount of others just breezing by watching!!

Then the other day, all about how things look, guy in BMW, crawling along the road, attractive girl walking parralel with car, was he hastling her? Were they a couple having an arguement and he was telling her to get back in car? Would i of been right or wrong to stop and ask if she was ok? You can imagine about 3 diffrent out-comes if did do that instantly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that the only thing the OP did wrong was not to foresee how his actions could of been viewed in todays society.

Go the Islands of scotland and ask if you can use the loo and they will probably ask if you wanted a cuppa and a cake too. Stayed in many a B&B that just asked you to leave payment on the table, total trust. What a wonderfull way to live a life.

Anyhoo.... Tony, If I stop to help people then I always try and approach in a way not to be threatening and be wary of been in a situation where I can be accused of something inapropriate.

And, yes, if I see a guy that has broken down in a dangerous place then Ill stop and tow him out the way of traffic/danger too.

Few years ago, young girls car had broken down in Lane 2 of 2 of the M80, just on the bend. Traffic was awfull. Not one person got out to help. It was a danger to her and others and causing massive traffic problems. Having an amber beacon on the jeep I had at the time I stopped and pushed her car to the hard shoulder. Amazing, once I stopped and started to help, others did.

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